How do you handle potential clients who engage in endless texting?

[marylander1940]

Endless, incoherent, and certainly redundant texting asking questions already answered in your ad is unfortunately part of the job. 

How do you handle endless texters? Do you ever ask them to call you so they can ask you everything they want and more instead of keeping the texting going. 

[ICTJOCK]

I’ve discovered that the conversation is part of the “experience “ and it turns them on.  Doesn’t mean they won’t book you, butI kind of wonder.  I usually curtail the conversation at some logical point.  The other reason is they are inexperienced and uncertain.  I’d rather pass at some point.

[Shawn Monroe]

As @Jamie21 has said before, you begin to recognize patterns. The majority of times, testers are looking for a warm body to talk to, not an actual appointment. So I’ll engage them for a bit, but once I realize it’s going nowhere, I’ll wrap it up or stop responding. 

[Simon Suraci]

I concur. I respond to questions, but I politely cut them off when it’s become very clear to me that they only want to sext for free or consume my time without any clear benefit to them deciding whether to hire me or not. If their comments and questions are not relevant to a hiring decision, scheduling, addressing legit concerns, etc, I know it’s time to exit asap.

Some clients don’t know when to stop, like asking me every day for weeks after a one hour appointment how my day was and initiating meaningless chit chat. I do a little bit of engagement here and there, but not daily, or multiple times a day, especially for a client I am very unlikely to see anywhere in the foreseeable future.

[NyGold]

On 8/31/2023 at 5:03 PM, ICTJOCK said:

I’ve discovered that the conversation is part of the “experience “ and it turns them on.  Doesn’t mean they won’t book you, butI kind of wonder.  I usually curtail the conversation at some logical point.  The other reason is they are inexperienced and uncertain.  I’d rather pass at some point.

If it doesn’t mean they wont book you per your comment, and if it’s not actual “sexting” maybe it’s something providers do need to incorporate more into their time and effort for marketing themselves (ie develop more tolerance).

 

 

[Vulgarii]

Some people actually get off on just talking and endless texting, and when I notice that I just tell them setting up an appointment isn't difficult and that all the details are on whatever website, and I ignore them and/or block.

[NyGold]

Maybe I’m naive … but what texting (sexting ) happens other than discussing rates, schedules prior to a paid meet?

 

 

[Jamie21]

1 hour ago, NyGold said:

Maybe I’m naive … but what texting (sexting ) happens other than discussing rates, schedules prior to a paid meet?

 

 

You are being naive! It can start off rather innocently: ‘hi can you tell me about x or y during the session, I’m thinking of booking’…. this question gets asked despite your advert or website being quite clear about the activities. However some clients like to ask…so you answer with some detail without making it salacious. 

Then they say ‘will you do x to me?’ ….you reply ‘yes x can be included’. Then comes back ‘can I do x to you?’…’yes you can’. Then a picture arrives of a part of his anatomy ‘do you like my x?’.  By now you know it’s a time waster and he’s sexting. I reply ‘if you’d like to book a session please let me know when and how long for’…

Other ‘clients’ (they’ve never booked but they keep saying they’re ‘definitely booking once they’ve saved up / got a free day / visit your area / lost weight etc) message regularly to chat and ask questions about the work: ‘hey how’s it going? What pants are you wearing today?’ ‘Any clients today?’ or they’ll send a cock / ass pic for comment ‘waiting for you’ or ‘I need your cock’ etc. It’s like they think they have a special relationship with you. 

Other times you get clients who did visit text some time later (it’s usually weeks afterwards) to say how they enjoyed it (which is nice!) but then they also want to talk about their session and kind of deconstruct it: ‘did you enjoy it? Was I your best client?’ ‘Tell me what you liked about me?’ This is awkward to answer because sometimes it’s hard to remember any details but you don’t want him to think he was just another client. I keep some notes now (to help me for potential future visits) so I can remember what he liked etc. 

So I hope you can see that handling enquiries etc can take up a lot of time! I’d say only 50% of enquiries end up with a client booking. The rest just don’t happen for various reasons to do with window shoppers, schedules that don’t align and those shopping where they can’t afford it. 
 

 

[Nodalguy]

These are just my thoughts as a client, but I can definitely understand what the complaint is and that probably tons of clients reach out wanting graphic wank material, or something like that.

First, I do think in some cases a not-insignificant number of texts are warranted just to confirm things and make actual plans.I had one case where we must have had a couple hundred Whatsapp texts over 2-3 weeks by the time it was all done (I am sure given how much he ended up making from me, he was quite happy to work through the details like that). The reason we had so many texts in that case is that he canceled on me and we had to reschedule, and then the original rescheduled time didn't end up working for a few reasons, so we had to reschedule again. There was also some back and forth regarding deposits (which I no longer do, but did for this case), as well as different possible scenarios and pricing and so on. On top of that, he was doing some shady things with his payment transfer accounts, so I had to ask him for an explanation.  I don't think a fixed number of messages "or I block" or "or I cut off contact," etc. is necessarily a good idea. I think the key is are the messages accomplishing anything? Is the client actually seeking to get information that will help him decide or make plans on rate, payment amount, potential partners, details on services, location, any "ask me" items, any enhancements, and so on.

I'll admit I've had a couple exchanges where I wanted to confirm some details and it probably sounded like I was trying to generate wank material. But again, one or two messages in isolation don't mean much in my view. It's the overall trajectory and multiple recent messages and what they're accomplishing.

If you want to cut it off, just be a little creative. "Can you reach out to me closer to the date we're planning to meet?" "Let's work through that in person." 

I'm sure other more creative people have or will provide more specific responses to cut off a wanker.

[NyGold]

@Jamie21thanks for enlightening me

so I have more sympathy if the escort complaint about time wasting through questions is about this …

but I’d ask then what’s the success rate from this type of engagement for a further booking as if it’s low why indulge them in the first place? 

but I’ll double down on my resentment at providers getting snippy with me then for time wasting given my questions are only on rates, logistics, a clinical questioning of what might be involved - as in comparison I’m totally “clean” 

[Jamie21]

If the client is just a bit green and probably anxious then I’m fine to indulge them in longer discussion. Even though most probably won’t book, a few do (I’m estimating about 20%), those kind of clients are great to see when they do come. So it’s worth talking with them. Everyone has to start somewhere don’t they? 

Practical questions are ok too although if they open with ‘how much is it?’ then I’m 95% confident it won’t happen. 

At the end of the day it’s very easy to quickly identify the time wasters, and to cut them off. 

 

[bigdipper]

One provider has figured a way to stop endless texts… his first reply is with a link to his Venmo account with his rate info! Not even a hello or how are you doing!

[DWnyc]

4 hours ago, bigdipper said:

One provider has figured a way to stop endless texts… his first reply is with a link to his Venmo account with his rate info! Not even a hello or how are you doing!

Well that approach would certainly put an end to any further texts (or any contact of any sort) from me 😊

[Guest]

On 8/31/2023 at 12:49 PM, marylander1940 said:

Endless, incoherent, and certainly redundant texting asking questions already answered in your ad

That sort of person cuts himself off. 1. "Endless" tells me he has little regard for peoples time.  2. "Incoherent" tells me that's not someone I'm interested in meeting 3. "Asking questions already answered in your ad" tells me that the person didn't read my ad. We're already off to a not so stellar start 😂

For whatever it's worth, I've never listed my phone number in ads so I feel I've reduced a lot of wasted time and energy. After a few back and forth's on RM via the messenger or inbox feature I can gather enough information to go forward or not, I'm certain the same can be said about me.  At the end of the day ( no pun intended ) we only have so much time and energy and how we choose to spend that time and energy is crucial. 

[Guest]

50 minutes ago, DWnyc said:

Not even a hello or how are you doing!

@bigdipper I  too 🙋🏻‍♂️ appreciate social graces. I'm never in so big a rush that I can't initiate communication with a simple "hello" and or "how are you?" Sometimes what we don't say speaks volumes 😉

Edited September 5, 2023 by V_Marco

[marylander1940]

18 minutes ago, V_Marco said:

That sort of person cuts himself off. 1. "Endless" tells me he has little regard for peoples time.  2. "Incoherent" tells me that's not someone I'm interested in meeting 3. "Asking questions already answered in your ad" tells me that the person didn't read my ad. We're already off to a not so stellar start 😂

For whatever it's worth, I've never listed my phone number in ads so I feel I've reduced a lot of wasted time and energy. After a few back and forth's on RM via the messenger or inbox feature I can gather enough information to go forward or not, I'm certain the same can be said about me.  At the end of the day ( no pun intended ) we only have so much time and energy and how we choose to spend that time and energy is crucial. 

Possibly people like that don't have a life outside their phone....

[edinbrooklyn]

On 8/31/2023 at 3:49 PM, marylander1940 said:

Endless, incoherent, and certainly redundant texting asking questions already answered in your ad is unfortunately part of the job. 

How do you handle endless texters? Do you ever ask them to call you so they can ask you everything they want and more instead of keeping the texting going. 

Crickets!

[Jarrod_Uncut]

On 9/1/2023 at 9:36 AM, Shawn Monroe said:

The majority of times, testers are looking for a warm body to talk to, not an actual appointment. 

Perfect way to describe: emotional vampires 🧛🏼‍♂️ 

 

Edited September 5, 2023 by Jarrod_Uncut

[Decatur Guy]

Don't want 20 or 25 texts for a first-time connection? Let's talk on the phone for five minutes. That will speed things along -- and help establish chemistry. I'm not sure what constitutes "endless texting," but I can't get that all that wrapped up in a few back and forths. A lot of younger providers in particular undercommunicate. If someone is going beyond 20 to 25 texts, yeah -- increasingly that's a sign they are stringing you along.

Personally, I hate texting beyond a few back and forths. But so many providers are INSISTENT on only texting. If a provider insists on texting, and it's our first time, get ready for more than a few texts or get ready to lose a new client. Even a well-written ad can't cover all the things that need to be nailed down: Time to meet, where to meet, potential parking instructions, who has the lube/condoms (or not), what I look like, confirmation I'm keeping appointment, confirmation I'm on the way, etc. And yes, a little bit about expectations on what we both enjoy. A list on RM doesn't always cover it all in one fell swoop. Rimming. What does that mean? Give or get or both? See what I mean?

Edited September 6, 2023 by Decatur Guy

[Archangel]

On 9/5/2023 at 12:01 PM, DWnyc said:

Well that approach would certainly put an end to any further texts (or any contact of any sort) from me 😊

Me too. And I’m someone who does book…

[Archangel]

How about this added element…

Texting with a client who’s paid a deposit? Or bought a plane/train ticket already?

I will book in advance. And I have (very rarely, and not without some unease) paid deposits. I believe that signals intent. I also like to text periodically before the meetup. I like to be friendly.

 I struggle with understanding how texting is such a time sucker. In my job, I receive emails, texts, and calls (I’d guess in that order of frequency) from people I work for at any hour of the day and in the middle of anything I’m doing. I always respond. It’s not an isolated event either. I have it from the moment I wake up til I go to sleep, even out of the office. Even with people who aren’t likely to produce a “connection.” I don’t find engaging people in communication in a people-job as that unbearable. I sometimes wonder what escorts do with all the time saved when they choose not to engage in small talk texting. I don’t mean that judgmentally, but just as a curiosity. I don’t invest a lot of time in a text conversation with specific folks as a general rule, and it usually satisfies/placates folks. When I send a message to a booked escort to make small talk maybe once a week before we actually meet, I don’t understand why that’s so terrible. It’s also okay for him to respond when he has a chance. I don’t expect immediate responses.

I don’t like when an escort will say he’ll text me back because he’s occupied in the moment. Not once has that ever happened. Whether I’m attempting to initiate booking or I’m booked and just checking in. Like an escort can tell the particular signs of behavior of clients, I can read the particular signs of behavior of escorts after having done this for a while. “I’m not able to text right now. I’ll text you back in a few hours/tomorrow/next week” never materializes. At least it hasn’t for me. Maybe someone else has had followup, but no moi. 

[The Dude]

What is considered “endless texting?”  I hate it when I have to text multiple times for the most basic of information.  If providers don’t like all the back-and-forth, tell me right away your general location, your rates, etc.  You know I’m going to ask anyway.

[+ DrownedBoy]

On 9/5/2023 at 6:46 AM, bigdipper said:

One provider has figured a way to stop endless texts… his first reply is with a link to his Venmo account with his rate info! Not even a hello or how are you doing!

Hey, I like that.

I'm not wasting time using texts for small talk - that's what talking is for.

My goal when I text someone is to schedule something at a particular price for particular services. The quicker an escort gets to the point, the better.

[RandyVue]

On 9/6/2023 at 9:58 AM, Archangel said:

I sometimes wonder what escorts do with all the time saved when they choose not to engage in small talk texting. I

Working their other jobs that pay them, studies if they’re in school, activities and hobbies that they are passionate about, spending time with their friends or family members, working out to stay in shape, working on their goals, etc.

Edited September 14, 2023 by RandyVue

[RandyVue]

On 9/5/2023 at 5:07 PM, Decatur Guy said:

Don't want 20 or 25 texts for a first-time connection? Let's talk on the phone for five minutes. That will speed things along -- and help establish chemistry. I'm not sure what constitutes "endless texting," but I can't get that all that wrapped up in a few back and forths. A lot of younger providers in particular undercommunicate. If someone is going beyond 20 to 25 texts, yeah -- increasingly that's a sign they are stringing you along.

Personally, I hate texting beyond a few back and forths. But so many providers are INSISTENT on only texting. If a provider insists on texting, and it's our first time, get ready for more than a few texts or get ready to lose a new client. Even a well-written ad can't cover all the things that need to be nailed down: Time to meet, where to meet, potential parking instructions, who has the lube/condoms (or not), what I look like, confirmation I'm keeping appointment, confirmation I'm on the way, etc. And yes, a little bit about expectations on what we both enjoy. A list on RM doesn't always cover it all in one fell swoop. Rimming. What does that mean? Give or get or both? See what I mean?

What on earth are you sending 20-25 text messages about? I do not believe for a second that you are sending a provider 20-25 messages to book an appointment. There’s no way! I would be embarrassed and I’d feel like a nuisance doing that. It reminds me of that movie Swingers where he calls the girl that he likes and leaves her like 12 messages for something he could’ve easily said in the first one…..and she tells him never to call again.

Edited September 14, 2023 by RandyVue