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DWnyc

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Everything posted by DWnyc

  1. Providers like this need to be “outed” - with the ability for them to defend themselves of course which is why forums like this are good. At some point if what you say is accurate this becomes akin to extortion, preying on client fears for safety, discretion etc - would help to know who he is if you’re comfortable sharing. The few times I’ve tried to leave without fully paying a donation for reasons I consider fully justified, it’s turned ugly; the most disengaged / high / drunk / entitled / narcissistic (etc etc) provider still wants his cash at the end of the day.
  2. In more than one of these cases I’m pretty sure specific individuals were targeted using the location feature - so someone already on some kind of list was lured into a trap where they generate evidence to use against them, rather than it being a general trap for anyone unlucky to engage with the cop.
  3. I don’t have a specific time to wait. I’ll reach out to multiple people as it’s rare I'm looking for a specific person, more looking to fill a specific schedule, and I like to have options. Took me a while to realize in the early days that providers don’t have dedicated 24/7 call centers servicing them so I don’t mind the varied response times - as long as we don’t get into the dynamic of them expecting me to be immediately responsive when they choose to engage, and that it should turn into a booking no matter what. If any only reply after I’ve made other plans, I’ll either politely decline or say now won’t work maybe later (and if they show fury at that, they go on the crossed out list). And if they’re reasonable I may even engage a little with full disclosure I’m getting info for the next time and it saves back and forth if there is a next time.
  4. Providers aren’t always the most rational or strategic. Though I can see someone interpreting a “no” as “I didn't actually enjoy our session” and so determining you’re no longer a realistic prospect worth cultivating. Not unlike the online hookup world where the etiquette seems to encourage ending on a positive note but it being acceptable to ghost / block the minute you walk out the door. Later in the month isn’t odd. I’ve even had providers reach out for later the same day if I’ve indicated I’ve enjoyed the experience - I don’t think they’re assuming you’re made of money as much as trying to monetize an apparently positive experience.
  5. No individual can determine whether something is “too” expensive - the market does a fine job of that. If supply (of what you’re offering and at what price) has insufficient demand - it’s too expensive. if on the other hand you are turning people away you’re likely underpriced and the market will welcome you raising prices and making a fine profit. Whether or not you make ends meet (and then some) has nothing to do with what a client will be willing to pay. If you have financial goals unmet with what you’re doing, you need to reevaluate those choices as many of us likely have had to do.
  6. I like the talk too. One of my selection criteria is if a provider seems they can engage. Which is why the act that many put on at the negotiation stage of one word grunts or “I’m too busy to even talk to you” is a turn off beyond the immediate physical aspect.
  7. Bingo Which of us has not complained about our jobs to someone at some point, including about compensation, even though most of us wouldn’t trade the security of a paycheck without a backstop or real probability of a better alternative.
  8. I think that holds for providers who top as well
  9. The most frequent reason I’ve been offered discounts is because the figurative rent check is due, and a discount is better than a zero revenue alternative, or it’s a means to getting more overall (tips, extended or repeat bookings, referrals). Most providers are business people first and foremost, and they’re not going to take a loss or a lower margin just because they’re going to enjoy part of their job more than they otherwise might. I think there’s a little game some don’t understand especially if they consider themselves above average. The seasoned provider will see through that, and just as he might tell someone he appreciates their humor / intelligence / kindness / power in real life etc (when he actually sees the self perception) he can play on that and validate with a gesture that brings in more in the long run. That’s smart business.
  10. Same writing style, same compliment said a different way (he’s so funny, he knows how to tell a joke, he makes me laugh … etc) and you know something funny is going on. And I assume when providers reappear with a new name/account it’s because of a negative review that was actually genuine and cut too close.
  11. Well I have been told that the size of the tip (of donation) is what brings most joy
  12. Exactly - they’re often the ones posting on this issue repeatedly.
  13. I would expect either me or the person I’m meeting, whether a provider or a dentist or a long lost relative visiting town to confirm at least the day before and definitely the day of. Not hard to do in this era of instant comms. “I’m about to leave, ETA xyz, are we still good?” has saved me from much hanging around for someone else running late or not wasting time on someone who can’t or won’t make it anymore. A provider who will ditch you because of a more lucrative opportunity or because they can’t keep to schedule for whatever reason can do so regardless even at the last minute. Don’t be the cause of any uncertainty at their end.
  14. The only point on AI here is that there are people who will be fooled now more than they would have been (checkout new apps available to everyone that allow you to create a mock app on your phone in seconds), just as they may have been when photoshop first became available - and the larger point about personal responsibility for one’s self still overrides. Everything else (eg the point about seroconversion between tests) opens up debate on those issues. That could be fine and informative for many whether new on here or not. If we can tolerate noise on all resulting discussion.
  15. It’s just good practice for Thanksgiving
  16. Yes and I’m not disagreeing (and include clients as potential fakers so no issue there) and actually doubling down on the point - Ie take responsibility for yourself and don’t rely on info from others that can be wrong for whatever reason. Because there are many people out there who will actually be satisfied with a quick glance at a piece of paper or an image on a phone (in hookups as well as what we are describing here). Especially among some of our demographic in this forum who think they can free-ride off public health efforts while weighing their fear of “discovery” (eg doctor/insurance records) / effort on their own part (if everyone else taking PREP why do I need to …) And partly I’m trying to say something new since this topic of personal responsibility comes up repeatedly.
  17. No - it just doesn’t constitute an appointment
  18. Just thinking about those folks (whether providers or clients / regular hookup partners) who knowingly (not accidentally or in ignorant bliss) misstate status … Given the technology out there including now with AI, do you really think it’s inconceivable someone could fake an HIV test result if that’s all it took to make the questions stop? I believe fake COVID tests and injection records overtook fake driving license and green card sales on the streets of New York at one point a couple of years ago …
  19. Tell typical NYC provider they’re no good as a provider and they’ll roll their eyes and likely comment on your performance as they show you out the door. Comment on their ability as an actor and be ready for a total meltdown.
  20. Even if I did all the above (told you I was coming to town, that I was happy to meet up, would text this week) that doesn’t constitute an appointment.
  21. Some may be pragmatic (as they see it) and assume it maximizes clientele and doesn’t put off those who could be offended by an “in your face” or sermonizing on status or prep use (same reason some undetectable on ART will only say “positive”) We’ve discussed here before how many have not stated status accurately - we know because they themselves have volunteered this to us or in other profiles - I know at least 2 in my geography and both made some fumbling noise about having forgotten to update their profiles, I just checked and after more than a year they still provide an incorrect status (not just blank) At the end of the day it shouldn’t really matter if you’re already ok seeing a provider if you protect yourself per your own tolerance level - and that can mean lots of different things
  22. You just killed the need for this site …😉
  23. That’s not the only reason many don’t want to pay deposits to providers but why is this not true? Pretty much every disclaimer or terms and conditions for cash sites makes it clear that they can and will share data with the government if requested and that they will proactively report anything they suspect violates their rules which includes transacting in illegal categories.
  24. Unless you’re advocating the abolition of free market economics that makes no sense
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