Giving Christmas gift to providers

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

2 hours ago, NYXboy said:

Maybe they say 'happy holidays' because they don't know if you are jewish, christian, muslim, atheist - and they just want to be kind and encompassing of everyone.  Your theory is weak- if you don't like people saying happy holidays because you watch Fox News - just say that! 

I edited my post to emphasize the secular traditions of the National Holiday referenced in the subject title.

I do the same with other legal holidays.  If I'm hosting an Independence Day pool party and fireworks celebration, I'll first say "Happy Independence Day".  If they respond with a generic "Happy Holiday" or "I don't celebrate American Independence", then I won't invite them to my celebration.  If they counter with Happy Canada Day, then I'll wish them Happy Canada Day and invite them to my Independence Day party and would ask them if they had any plans to celebrate Canada Day.  I would gladly go to a Canada Day event if they asked me.

How silly it would be for an American and Canadian to wish each other "Happy Holiday" for two separate holidays that occur at a similar time of the year.  Likewise, it is silly to diminish the importance Hanukkah by lumping it together with Christmas in a generic Happy Holiday.

Back to the topic of Christmas gifts, I have a few regular providers that I send Christmas cards to, and one that I send Christmas gifts to.  The cards and gifts are on par with those I give to my close friends with whom I am not regularly sexually involved.

Edited December 21, 2023 by Vegas_Millennial

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

43 minutes ago, Becket said:

Why is this a hard question?

In many cultures, gifts or tips are interpreted as insulting.  So it's important to know if the recipient participates in Western cultural Christmas time norms.

[Thelatin]

I routinely took a provider out for nice dinners.  It was my custom to wear multiple nice bracelets….many of which I knew would be taken from me over the table lol.  But bb….you have two.

I always enjoy gifting. 

[+ glutes]

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

42 minutes ago, glutes said:

Amen.  The best gift I can ever receive is to be in an escort's presence!

[+ DrownedBoy]

I just send them a Christmas tip on one of their apps. Money is always welcome. But it's only for providers I've been seeing for at least several years.

I only do this for regulars who lock me in on their rates when I first hired them. One hand washes the other.

Edited December 21, 2023 by DrownedBoy

[Marc in Calif]

5 hours ago, Vegas_Millennial said:

In many cultures, gifts or tips are interpreted as insulting.  So it's important to know if the recipient participates in Western cultural Christmas time norms.

And there you go again, assuming that Christmas is the "norm." 😒

Why not just give a gift with a simple and genuine This is for you, my dear! I've really appreciated your companionship over the years! 

[+ Pensant]

8 hours ago, NYXboy said:

Maybe they say 'happy holidays' because they don't know if you are jewish, christian, muslim, atheist - and they just want to be kind and encompassing of everyone.  Your theory is weak- if you don't like people saying happy holidays XXX just say that! 

The funny thing about Happy Holidays is that it is derived from Happy Holy Days!

[Marc in Calif]

16 minutes ago, Pensant said:

The funny thing about Happy Holidays is that it is derived from Happy Holy Days!

And the eight days and nights of Hanukkah are definitely not "holy." It's a fairly minor holiday compared to others.

For Jewish people, the holy days typically come two or three months before December 25. 😊

[+ glutes]

What are the High Holy Days?

Of the two main High Holy Days, also called the High Holidays, the first is Rosh Hashanah, or the New Year celebration. It is one of two new year celebrations in the Jewish faith, the other being Passover in the spring.

The second High Holiday is Yom Kippur, or the Day of Atonement.

[soloyo215]

22 hours ago, BananaBagel said:

Does anyone give Christmas gifts to providers? I’m seeing a guy on Friday evening. We’ve had many appointments over many years and are friendly to a point. I’d like to give him something to  nod to how special he is - but I don’t want to make things weird. 

I haven't thought of any of my providers for holiday gifts, but it's not weird, IMO. It's a good gesture. Of course, goes without saying that it's a good gesture for as long as you're not creepy about it. I mean, there aren't any restraining orders in place, right? Joke aside, if it's coming from a good place, just because you want to shower him with a gift, by all means. On the other hand, if you are expecting something in return (other than his gratitude), be graceful if that doesn't work and all you get is his gratitude.

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

On 12/21/2023 at 8:27 AM, mature_guy said:

On 12/20/2023 at 7:01 PM, glutes said:

Paying your provider ~~$350/hour "many times", he should be giving you a present.

That happened to me this year, for the first time, one of my regulars gave me a gift when we met earlier this month.  

I usually give a cash gift to a couple of regulars I've seen on a long term basis.

Last year one of my new masseurs (now a regular masseur) gave me a scented candle 🕯️ for Christmas.   It was totally unexpected, but very much appreciated.

This year, a provider gave me a free session last night as a Christmas gift. It's nice when it works both ways. 😊

As I get older, I look back and remember the unexpected Christmas gifts the most. 🌲

Edited December 22, 2023 by Vegas_Millennial

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

3 hours ago, Pensant said:

The funny thing about Happy Holidays is that it is derived from Happy Holy Days!

My co-worker, friends, and regular providers know to only wish me a "happy Holiday" when I'm leaving for travel, or as they say across the pond, "going on vacation".  No gifts are exchanged until I come back from holiday 😊 (meaning, I bring them a gift from my holiday abroad).

Edited December 22, 2023 by Vegas_Millennial

[Bargara Leatherboy]

Not Christmas or Holiday related but I had a great overnight with a highly respected gentleman.  I had put the money in an envelope and it included a tip - which he messaged me later to say thank you for.

During our conversations I while we were organising the overnight, I learnt that he enjoyed cigars - and scotch - so I bought some cigars and scotch duty free on my way to the country he was in, and yes we smoke some and drank some during the night.

 

In the morning I gave him the 3 or 4 cigars that were left in the pack and the remains of the scotch bottle with the simple explantation that I would not be partaking of either so please enjoy them .....

 

it was neither awkward or uncomfortable 

 

[Guest]

[Rudynate]

On 12/21/2023 at 5:46 AM, BananaBagel said:

Makes me wish I kept track of his size. I’ve surely had the chance to look at the tags of his clothes on the floor. 

While I don't think he would care at all if you wanted to know his size, I would ask  him.  To me, looking at the tags in his clothes is nosy.

[Rudynate]

14 hours ago, Pensant said:

The funny thing about Happy Holidays is that it is derived from Happy Holy Days!

There are holy days that are feast days and holy days that are fast days. 

[nate_sf]

1 hour ago, Vin_Marco said:

As someone with a December birthday, this resonates! 🤣

[nate_sf]

Maybe I'm old fashioned or had learned this from my mom, but I thought it's customary to provide service folks with small gifts or bonuses this time of year. A little cash or something to the mail carrier, paperboy (if there is still such a thing), hairdresser/barber, cleaners, etc.

So I'd think if an escort or massage provider is a regular, a small gift would be in keeping with this tradition. Of course there is passion involved with an escort/masseur's services so that might confuse things a bit, but a bit of extra cash or a small gift seems just fine.

[+ Pensant]

Exactly. I just tipped my long-term fitness coach $200.

[Whippoorwill]

Like nate_sf, I was brought up to always give a token New Year's gift to service providers...the mailman, hair dresser, cleaning lady, newspaper boy, etc. It's a thank you for a year of good service and a hope for a coming year of good service. For many years I was in a personal service business, and often received a holiday gift from clients. A bottle of decent wine, a box of good chocolates, a gift card, cash...depending on the person. Why ever would a masseur or escort be confused by this?

[myophile]

6 hours ago, Pensant said:

Exactly. I just tipped my long-term fitness coach $200.

I always did this with my former trainer, and I assumed it was customary. But this year, when I tipped ($300 gift card) my new trainer, who has been in the business for more than a decade, he thanked me, and said he was quite touched: apparently I was the first client who had ever tipped him like this at the holidays. I was shocked  — what is the MATTER with people???

Edited December 23, 2023 by myophile

[+ DrownedBoy]

2 hours ago, nate_sf said:

Maybe I'm old fashioned or had learned this from my mom, but I thought it's customary to provide service folks with small gifts or bonuses this time of year. A little cash or something to the mail carrier, paperboy (if there is still such a thing), hairdresser/barber, cleaners, etc.

So I'd think if an escort or massage provider is a regular, a small gift would be in keeping with this tradition. Of course there is passion involved with an escort/masseur's services so that might confuse things a bit, but a bit of extra cash or a small gift seems just fine.

That is correct. Traditional manners involves giving gifts to service people on Christmas. Few people remember that.

[Jamie21]

I can accept tips via my justforfans. Just saying😉

[Ali Gator]

Exactly a year ago, I met with a masseur who was traveling through my area and spending Christmas weekend here. It was my third or fourth time meeting with him since the summer. His family was overseas, so he wasn't able to travel to be with them for Christmas, so he was 'working' the holiday weekend.  Turned out on Dec 23, 2022 I was his last appointment at 5 pm. He had nothing to do the rest of the evening, so I suggested I'd take him out to dinner and we would have our own 'Christmas dinner'. Sometimes such 'simple things' mean so much. 

 

I was careful to choose a place we'd be comfortable with (he was wearing a track suit, so couldn't go for fine dining) and would fit his food preferences (he's vegetarian).  I took him to a nearby locally-owned family restaurant, sat at the bar with him, and had a wonderful dinner and pleasant time with the others at the bar (turned out there was a couple there who was traveling to his home-country in mid-January, so that made for an easy / engaging conversation for him). Being with this handsome guy (with a hot body) and watching how genuinely happy he was 'in this strange land' made my Christmas. It was a memorable evening.

 

When I drove him back to his hotel, he thanked me profusely for such a special evening and making his Christmas 'less lonely'. When he leaned in to kiss me good night, unexpectedly it turned out to be quite a make-out session in my car in the parking lot. He wanted me to go back to his room with him, but I wanted to end the night without going further (we went much further in his other appointments since then).