Experiencea hiring as a fat man?

[bigfattie]

Hello, guys!!

I don’t really hire escorts often, and when I do, it’s usually just to suck their dick.

I’m 25 years old and still a virgin, and I want to change that! The problem is that I don’t know if any escort would say yes to penetrative sex (I’d bottom), because, well, I’m fat 😕 I’m 185 cm tall (6'0") and weigh 95 kg (209 lbs). I’m super clean and chill, etc.

What are the chances that the escorts I’m interested in will reject me?

To be fair to myself, I did have an escort once ask if he could fuck me while I was sucking his dick, and I was so dumbfounded that I said no lol. I tried reaching out to him again later, and he said yes but that I would have to travel half the world since he moved to germany lol.

Is it fair to assume that I’ll get at least one yes out of the three men I'm interested??

[mike carey]

Welcome to the forum, @bigfattie. You're likely to get comments from supportive to, well, less so, but you'll also get thoughtful answers. In the US, at 1.85m/95kg, many people would say you're not fat at all, although at 25, and (since you defaulted metric) in another country (like me), you may be self conscious about your weight. Some escorts may decline to see you but most won't care. Just ask them (as I do about my age), if they say no, you know where you stand, and in either case you have set your mind at rest about your decision. Happy hiring!

[big-n-tall]

When you do a search for providers (if you're using rentmen) in your area be sure to look for ones that have "bears" in their intos. Also read the ad copy carefully. Some guys will specifically state they are into bigger men.

[+ Kman]

Welcome, @bigfattie,  I am a bigger guy as well and I’m pretty sure I was bigger than you when I first hired. I don’t know the exact number but I think I’ve had less than five guys say no based on my size or when I gave them my picture.  As @big-n-tall said look for profiles that are into ‘bears’ or that say ‘I welcome all shapes and sizes’ or something similar.  Have fun and be safe! 

[jusmeinbr]

This is just a suggestion.  I created my own RM client profile that outlines just about every question a prospective provider may have.  I make it a point to send that link in my introductory text.  
 

I’ll just say this.  I’m 62 years old, not as tall as you (5’9”), and weigh far more than you (240), and I’ve found that I never have any trouble getting positive responses and positive experiences.

It probably helps my case that I like to place the provider up on a pedestal, with me taking on the mental attitude that I’m very fortunate the provider is willing to even be in the same room with me, and my profile makes it very, very clear that I seek ONLY to worship his feet, have my face sat upon by him, and be spanked by him.  I make it clear that I will “take care of things later.”

My problem is the opposite of yours in that I seek highly specific attributes of a provider in order for me to cultivate and maintain that mental attitude that motivates me to be subservient.  It doesn’t take much to TOTALLY screw that mentality up by my knowledge that the provider is a smoker (I never have in my entire life), uses drugs (I never have), or has an abundance of tattoos.  Any one of those (especially drugs or heavy presence of tattoos) causes me to perceive the provider as not even being worthy of being in the same room as me (that’s how important that mentality is for me),  thus making it impossible for me to gear myself up mentally to willingly and eagerly accept a high level of pain (spanking) from the provider.

If someone as unique as me with my non-standard criteria has been able to meet with dozens and dozens of providers over the last 23 years, trust me, you aren’t going to have any trouble at all!

[SecretProvider]

5 hours ago, bigfattie said:

I don’t know if any escort would say yes to penetrative sex (I’d bottom),

5 hours ago, bigfattie said:

I did have an escort once ask if he could fuck me w

You already answered your question here.  Of course they will say yes. 

My advice - reach out to provider you like, be honest about your size (i promise they have seen bigger) and go and enjoy yourself. You will have better luck if you chose someone who is already well reviewed both on rentmen and on here.

Maybe even reach out to the escort that moved to Germany and ask him if he has any friends you think you'd click with. 

Good Luck and Enjoy. 

[+ SidewaysDM]

Please take all the great suggestions from the previous comments on this thread! There is some awesome advice on this thread for you!
 

Welcome to the forum, @bigfattie! I understand your reservations, better than most. I have only been hiring for less than a year.

I am a virgin with men, not with women, so this has been a whole new experience for me. Having sex with men, has been an interesting and amazing journey. 

I am a much bigger guy than you. I am 6’ 1” and weigh 285 lbs and I am 64 years old.

I truly thought I would find one or two providers, who would give oral, rim, top or bottom me. To my pleasant surprise, every provider I have contacted was very supportive and willing to provide all the services that I was curious about. Even though I prefer being a Side, which for me entails, oral, rimming and other fetishes. 
 

The key to a successful and enjoyable encounters with providers is fairly simple. Most importantly, communicate clearly what you want and need. Also, be kind, pleasant and respectful, which you sure seem to be.  Of course, being really clean and hygienic, which you are. I also am always on time and give a tip for great service. 
 

If you follow these steps, I promise you will a number of great providers to choose from. You will be amazed how much fun and great sex you can experience! 
 

My only regret in exploring my gay sexuality is that didn’t start hiring years ago!

Get out there and find some great providers, who will give you the tools to explore and enjoy some awesome sex with a variety of guys! 

[Mark_fl]

Good advice above. One more piece from me. Your problem isn't your weight, it's your self-esteem.  You aren't so big that you need to lead with it, or even point it out. 

Change your name to something that highlights something good about yourself, and enjoy!

[SecretProvider]

4 hours ago, SidewaysDM said:

The key to a successful and enjoyable encounters with providers is fairly simple. Most importantly, communicate clearly what you want and need. Also, be kind, pleasant and respectful, which you sure seem to be.  Of course, being really clean and hygienic, which you are. I also am always on time and give a tip for great service. 

this is fantastic advice - for anyone, no matter their size. 

[zeyfur]

16 hours ago, bigfattie said:

Hello, guys!!

I don’t really hire escorts often, and when I do, it’s usually just to suck their dick.

I’m 25 years old and still a virgin, and I want to change that! The problem is that I don’t know if any escort would say yes to penetrative sex (I’d bottom), because, well, I’m fat 😕 I’m 185 cm tall (6'0") and weigh 95 kg (209 lbs). I’m super clean and chill, etc.

What are the chances that the escorts I’m interested in will reject me?

To be fair to myself, I did have an escort once ask if he could fuck me while I was sucking his dick, and I was so dumbfounded that I said no lol. I tried reaching out to him again later, and he said yes but that I would have to travel half the world since he moved to germany lol.

Is it fair to assume that I’ll get at least one yes out of the three men I'm interested??

Just ask. A professional provider should have no issues as long as it is a service they generally provide..

[jackcali]

9 hours ago, Mark_fl said:

Good advice above. One more piece from me. Your problem isn't your weight, it's your self-esteem.  You aren't so big that you need to lead with it, or even point it out. 

Change your name to something that highlights something good about yourself, and enjoy!

If I could click the +1 button in this post more than once, I would click it ten times.  Escorts, at least the successful ones, are used to dealing with clients with a wide variety of sizes and shapes.  I started hiring in my 50s, when I was 5-9 and 205 pounds and it never occurred to me to flag my weight to a potential hire.  I just gave my stats (age, height, weight, dick size) and my interests to the escort so there were no surprises.  I don't recall ever being turned down specifically because of my weight, but if there was something in that information that turned the escort off more than the money turned him on, I was glad not to see him.  

To the OP, you are so much more than what the scale says.  Also, you're not even that fat compared to a lot of the population.  If you're insecure about your weight, try to do something about it (or not, no judgment or pressure here), but don't let it negatively interfere with your life.  Not to gloat, because it's entirely due to Ozempic, but I'm down to 175.  I also shrunk to 5-8, but that happens when you get old.  I'm also just as ugly as I was a quarter-century ago, and that hasn't had much impact on my hiring either.

Good luck, be happy and love yourself for your best qualities!

[MaybeMaybeNot]

You are not a big fattie. Your perspective is wrong.  And, to be honest, your stats could make you very hot. 

[TxDaddyBear]

I am a bigger guy who decided one day to jump into this world as a provider. Some people have no interest in me, others can't wait to meet me. It's always going to be that way. The important thing is to know how fabulous you are and plenty of escorts out there that will happily take care of all your needs. Just don't get stuck in your head. Sometimes that voice is your head is very wrong!! 

You sound adorable. Come see this daddy bear in San Francisco sometime!

[Wings246]

I’ve only been in this world for a bit more than a year.  I did share similar sentiments with you when I first started.  I worried about this and that and questioned if I would be rejected for ABC and XYZ reasons.

Trust me, there is absolutely nothing that the providers haven’t heard or seen.  I’m very sure most, if not all, providers will welcome you with open arms (and many other body parts).

There’s too much fun to be had.  Don’t waste time and energy on second guessing yourself.