The Pejorative Side of "Daddy"

[+ PhileasFogg]

Am I the only older guy who doesn't like to be called "Daddy?"

I know most gay men don't have kids or grandkids. I do.

I have very few rules with guys I get with - no drugs, keep it vanilla, etc - but my #1 Rule is "Don't call me Daddy"

For me, that's a moniker reserved for my adult kids.   And the thought of being in a fit of passion with someone who calls me "daddy" makes me cringe at the association.

Am I alone in this because of my personal family composition or are there others who feel this way?

[+ JamesB]

I’m guessing you’re not hiring Latins, since most of them will definitely call you “Papi.” 😂😂

[+ BOZO T CLOWN]

At the strip clubs in NYC (where it's at least 80% - 90% Latino performers), Bozo is greeted by either "Hey baby" or the more endearing "Hola papi". But never daddy. 

BTC
🤡

[DenverDad]

If I'm wanting to do a daddy/boy scene, then no issue for me.  But if a random guy at a bar calls me daddy, I will usually correct him that it is grandpa

[Nue2thegame]

I don’t like it either but have learned to tolerate it when it’s shouted in a moment of exceptional passion (few and far between). But, “who’s your daddy” can mean something entirely different.
Papi has a little different connotation from “Daddy “. In addition to meaning father, it can also be used as a substitute for buddy or pal, according to this gringo. 

Edited December 18 by Nue2thegame

[+ Jamie21]

If they’re paying they can call me whatever they like. Lots of young guys like to hire older experienced guys who know what they’re doing. I work that market: ‘Let daddy massage you boy’. 🤪

[BeamerBikes]

1 hour ago, JamesB said:

I’m guessing you’re not hiring Latins, since most of them will definitely call you “Papi.” 😂😂

The first time my Dominican Masseur called me Papi, I did get some goosebumps.  
 

but yes @PhileasFogg, I’ll joke about Daddy advice, but I don’t like the Daddy/Boy labels outside of the bedroom as role play.  In everyday life, I’d rather two adults mutual respect etc. Power dynamics will still exist between older/younger or provider/clients, but I don’t get off on that being pointed out in public. 

[+ Lucky]

Didn't someone named Daddy use to own this website? We all called him Daddy. I think the name is usually used with affection or good intent, so it doesn't bother me.

[+ SidewaysDM]

I love it! I am 64 with no children, so they can call me daddy, papi or whatever name comes out of their mouth in the heat of passion! 

[+ Charlie]

But I draw the line at "Gramps."😒

[Nue2thegame]

Call me anything but late for dinner. 

[+ PhileasFogg]

2 hours ago, JamesB said:

I’m guessing you’re not hiring Latins, since most of them will definitely call you “Papi.” 😂😂

I know what it means... and I do tell them "no papi"

 

1 hour ago, Jamie21 said:

If they’re paying they can call me whatever they like. Lots of young guys like to hire older experienced guys who know what they’re doing. I work that market: ‘Let daddy massage you boy’. 🤪

and all this time, I thought you were 21 Jamie

[+ JamesB]

21 minutes ago, PhileasFogg said:

I know what it means... and I do tell them "no papi"

 

On a more serious note, it really doesn’t matter much to me. I have a son, and since we’re both fluent in English and Spanish, he calls me either Dad or “Papá”. I’m actually the one who sometimes calls him “Papi”. 

I also have a regular provider from Asia who calls me “dear”. The first time, I’ll admit it caught me a bit off guard, but I eventually realized it’s a language and cultural thing, so it doesn’t bother me at all. Honestly, as long as there’s no intention of disrespect and they do the job I’m paying them to do well, they can call me whatever they like.

[+ Jamie21]

47 minutes ago, PhileasFogg said:

I know what it means... and I do tell them "no papi"

 

and all this time, I thought you were 21 Jamie

21 at heart @PhileasFogg…

[jeezifonly]

4 hours ago, PhileasFogg said:

Am I alone in this because of my personal family composition or are there others who feel this way?

Not alone, I imagine. It's not generally intended as a pejorative, but your specific relationship to the word as a father can certainly take the sexy out of it. You’re right to ask to not be called that.

If you have a preferred similar generic term like "buddy" "boss" or "coach" that fits your vibe, let him know. Unless you're also a coach or have workers reporting to you...

[wsc]

I just correct them with, "That's bitch to you, punk."

[mike carey]

2 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

21 at heart @PhileasFogg…

I, on the other hand, am 21 and some months.

[+ PhileasFogg]

9 minutes ago, mike carey said:

I, on the other hand, am 21 and some months.

So was my mother until I became proficient in arithmetic 

[mike carey]

2 minutes ago, PhileasFogg said:

So was my mother until I became proficient in arithmetic 

The maths is indisputable. Some numbers are rational, some are irrational, some imaginary, but no matter what 'some months' means, the numbers never lie.

[big-n-tall]

I don't mind being called daddy, baby, sir, bro,... even unc (as in uncle). However, one of my regulars, during a session started calling me master. I got turned off real quick and told him not to call me that ever again. 😋 It gave me the ick for some reason.

Edited December 18 by big-n-tall

[Nightowl]

Call me daddy but don’t call me grandpa.  I take “daddy” to be a compliment but “grandpa” to be an insult.

[BigK]

Don’t like being called daddy either but sometimes when it slips out, I just slip back in.

[+ Pensant]

Yeah, Daddy can be pretty cringey.

[LookingAround]

In the gay community it's used as a term of endearment. 

[BuffaloKyle]

I don't like it as I still think of myself as young, I'm 39. (I know you can be a daddy and still feel young) and I don't look like the typical "daddy" type you'd see in porn.