Charlie

I let people know if they are mentioned in my will. It makes them much friendlier when I am alive.

I wonder where that other guy's arm is headed>

It's finally cooling down here in Palm Springs: today's high temp is supposed to be only 107F.

I still get mentally aroused by porn, but for some reason it never works its way down to my prostate.

Since Lucky died only a few weeks before his birthday, his partner decided to throw a birthday party for him anyway, on the Monday afternoon of the day. About 20 people showed up, mostly locals but also a few family members from LA. We enjoyed cake and drinks, made short speeches and toasted a portrait of him. Now he can finally be laid to rest.

It looks like little brother wants to imitate big brother.

The heat in Palm Springs has been miserable this summer. The thermometer in my backyard got permanently stuck on 111F about a week ago; the predicted high today is 112. I had planned to drive up to visit a cousin in Wyoming at the beginning of August, but when I checked the forecast for my driving route, I saw that it was predicted to be over 100F almost every day along my route. So I told my cousin I would re-schedule the visit for October. Some people in other parts of the country say to me when I grouse about it, "Oh, but it's a dry heat." Then why are my clothes stuck to me as I sit here typing this early in the morning?

Another provider whose "map me" function indicates he is available at City Hall.

When I met my life partner, neither of us was a virgin (we had both been out for several years), so one of our first discussions was about whether ours would be an exclusive relationship or one which accepted the possibility of sex with other men. We admitted that we were both sexual sluts at heart and unlikely to change, so we agreed that sex with other men was acceptable, as long as we were honest with one another about our activities. Neither of us had ever paid for sex (this was before Internet sites like this one had even been invented--we didn't even have personal computers!), so weren't aware that it was possible to shop for providers--whatever we did outside the relationship was usually the result of a spur-of-the-moment opportunity. We both agreed that one-off experiences were acceptable, but multiple experiences with the same person were not. As far as I am aware, we both kept to the terms of that compact during the 56 years we were together.

I retired at 62 and started taking SS immediately, mainly because my spouse was 8 years old than I was, and I figured if we were going to have any fun in retirement (travel, etc.), I had better do it as soon as possible.

Game, set and MATCH!

My dog also reacts to signals that I might be going out without him, like changing my clothes during the day or even loading my pockets. But he never retaliates by pooping or peeing in the house. His reaction is always to try to hide somewhere, but of course he always chooses the same places, so I have no trouble finding him.

For some reason, my dog doesn't react to my brushing my teeth at all when I get up in the morning or prepare to go to bed at night, but if I do it at any time during the day, he immediately sees it as a signal that I am going to go out somewhere, and he hides under the bed, because he is afraid I will put him in his cage to keep him from misbehaving while I leave him home alone.

I was first introduced to amyl nitrate--"poppers"--in the 1960s; they were called "poppers" because they were sold in little tubes wrapped in yellow cloth and "popped" and soaked the cloth when you broke them before you inhaled. I only used them when I was close to coming, because they intensified the orgasm. Friends told me they got headaches if they used them frequently during a scene, so I never did. I used them many times over the years, and luckily I never had an experience like the one that you had.

I never thought of myself as either one.: To me, "fem" was a man who acted like/wanted to be a woman, but I was just a man who liked to have sex with other men. I wanted to be perceived as a man by both men and women. I could be top or bottom, or both even with the same partner. I was a young man of average height, weight, and looks. In high school and college, I dated girls, but was not interested in having sex with them. I came out as gay to family and friends when I was in my early 20s. I wasn't interested in drag, for myself or for my boyfriends. I worked out at a gym, but was not particularly athletic. I had a beard and mustache, but they were primarily to distract attention from the fact that I was starting to go bald at an early age. I don't think anyone would be shocked when meeting me to learn that I am gay, but I don't think they would automatically assume that I was, unless they already knew.that I was married to a man (who was also neither fem nor masc).

I misunderstood the assumption of the question when I read the title of this thread, because it immediately reminded me of one of the most important episodes in my life. I was traveling alone and checked into a gay guest house on Cape Cod, and in the lobby I got into a conversation with another guest. He told me he was traveling with a friend, and it was his friend's birthday: he was trying to assemble a group of guests for a dinner at a nearby restaurant to celebrate his friend's birthday, and he invited me to join the group. I was a stranger in town and didn't know where I would eat, so I said I'd be happy to join the party of about 8 men which he had assembled. At the large round restaurant table, I found myself seated next to the birthday boy. We got into an animated conversation, and at one point I realized that no one else was conversing: they were all watching the two of us. Well, of course, later that night the two of us ended up in bed in my room. He and his friend checked out the next day to continue their trip, but before they left, birthday boy and I made arrangements to meet at his home in NY when our travels around New England were over. We did, and we ended up living together for the next 56 years.

I had no idea that NY State lawmakers had ever dealt with this subject.

I never had a weight problem--I was always naturally skinny, just like my father. I also worked out at a gym regularly for most of my youth and middle age, and when I retired, I became an almost daily tennis player. However, in old age I have become less physically active for several reasons, and not long ago, I caught a glance of myself after getting out of the shower, and I was shocked to realize that for the first time in my life, I have a bulge around my waist, even though my overall weight has only slightly increased (I am now 5'10" and 148 lbs.). I have an annual physical coming up with my doctor, and I intend to ask his advice about the appropriate way to deal with it, because I have never dieted at any time in my life. (OK, I'll admit it: I hope he will suggest some kind of shot or pill that will deflate my spare tire.)

I would agree with those who say there is no specific physical action comparable to heterosexual "loss of virginity," which usually is defined as vaginal penetration. Most gay men would think of their first consensual physical interaction with another male that involved the penis--whether it be sucking, getting sucked, fucking or getting fucked--as loss of virginity, but others would think that even passionate kissing would count. Loss of virginity for gay men has more to do with the reason for the physical interaction than the physical specifics. Some would even include mutual masturbation if it is motivated by sexual attraction to the other male.

I have just finished reading A Troubled Oasis: A Critical History of Palm Springs, California, by Ronald Eugene Isetti, an historian who has written several histories of places in California. It is a serious analysis of the area from its original settlement by the Cahuilla Indians until the present. It deals with all sorts of social and political issues, but the long last chapter deals with the arrival and influence of the gay community, entitled "Coming of the Gays and Lesbians, 1990 to the Present." Obviously, they didn't arrive out of nowhere, and there are many references earlier in the book to notable gay residents, but the placement of this chapter at the end of the history seems to imply that the GLBTQ community is now the most important social influence in the city. I am not sure that I would agree with that conclusion, but it is the only serious academic history I have ever read that seems to arrive at such a claim.

A memorial for Lucky was held yesterday at a church in Palm Springs. Unfortunately, it was the hottest day of the year (117 degrees at the time of the service), and there were not many people present--another old friend of his and I were almost the only non-family members, and we were both asked to speak about our experience with him, which we did relatively truthfully (we did not discuss the primary subject matter of this website). One of the most positive aspects of the memorial was the fact that everyone present knew and openly acknowledged Lucky's sexual orientation in a very positive way (e.g., his nieces and nephews all refer to his partner as "Uncle"). I was moved by the love and admiration that his family members obviously felt for him. He was my best friend in Palm Springs for many years, and I will truly miss him.

I had that model Plymouth when I was a young dude!

I wonder why "Milo" is such a common name here in Palm Springs these days? I even have two new neighbors on my block who have dogs named Milo!

This is a hard question to answer, since the profession is not the only non-sexual aspect of an individual. Just as I would not reject someone as a friend just because he sells his body for sexual activity even if he is is disgusted by the buyer, I would not refuse to have sex with someone I am physically attracted to solely because he also practices another profession that I find repugnant for some reason. Most of us have friends who have some religious or political belief or practice that we do not agree with, yet we accept the totality of the person as a friend anyway; the real question is how strongly we feel about the person's profession or belief as a disqualification for friendship. No matter how sexually attractive a person appears to me, I would find it difficult to have sex with him if I knew that he practiced a profession that I considered truly immoral, especially if he did not not consider it immoral at all (or even worse, if he did consider it immoral, and didn't care). When we insist that everyone we interact with practice or believe exactly as we do, then we are reduced to being members of a cult.

That is one of my favorite products, too.