Providers requiring Client photo to meet!?

[Nightowl]

1 hour ago, Archangel said:

And likely if you feel secure enough to do that, you already sense he’s a decent enough guy not to back out…

Yes.  I’ve already determined that there is a foundation of mutual trust and decency.

[+ KensingtonHomo]

1 hour ago, Archangel said:

There are many guys who act like it’s our privilege to pay them to deign to fuck us. It’s a constellation of issues that breeds this mindset, but it’s definitely rife among a certain type of guy.

It's a microcosm of the larger gay male social milieu, where youth and beauty are seen as more important then wisdom, sexual skill, kindness, etc. 

[JayCeeKy]

Whenever a "provider" requires a photo I always send this one - and it usually satisfies their demand.

 

[pubic_assistance]

On 7/1/2025 at 8:32 PM, jockstrapdaddy said:

What are your thoughts? Do you provide photos? 

I have NO problem providing a photo.

I dont send nudes to escorts. I send face/clothed body shots. Its not Grindr, but they do have a right to see who they are meeting. 

[dbar123]

I don’t mind sending a head shot that’s already in the public domain. What I really loathe are the escorts who want to have a conversation prior to hiring. I just don’t want to work that hard for a hookup

[soloyo215]

I've been asked for a pic 3 times, the first 2 in USA. I didn't think of blackmailing, particularly since the people who matter in my life know that I hire, and my employer has more important things to worry about. I know that's my employer's position since it already happened. Apparently somebody wanted to blackmail or mess with an employee and started sending pictures and emails about that employee and it had no effect.

The 2 times in USA I sent the picture (face), the provider either liked me or wanted verification of authenticity. The experience went well on the two instances. The third time was in Havana, Cuba. The only concern I had was that the guy was into santería. He also sent me his picture (and, Good God, was he hot!). I had a great time with him too. I never woke up at night acting funny, nor was I possessed by Changó, so nothing happened after, and if my picture is being misused in Cuba, who cares.

I like discretion, of course, but though I prefer anonymity, I don't feel anything other than worry about my personal information being divulged, but nothing around being ashamed or embarrassed. Signs of not being too discrete, in my experience, show in other ways before booking, so I have not proceeded with a booking if I feel like the guy might not respect my privacy or discretion.

As for rejection, well, it's bound to happen. Nobody likes rejection, but I prefer it before wasting [more] time and money in an unworthy provider.

On 7/1/2025 at 8:32 PM, jockstrapdaddy said:

Edited to add: 
Just curious about some demographics for those that aren't concerned about sharing a photo:

* Are you retired?
* Are you at will employment, self employed or some form of union? 
* Are you in a blue state (US)? 

No, I wish, not really. I love my job and will never be doing nothing.

Yes, yes-ish, no.

That doesn't matter. Assholes, bigots, racists and religious nutjobs and are everywhere in the USA. It's not wise to think that we are better or worse because we are in a red or blue state. My neighborhood is full of rainbow flags all over, and I am still quite hated for no reason.

Edited July 3 by soloyo215

[marylander1940]

25 minutes ago, pubic_assistance said:

I have NO problem providing a photo.

I dont send nudes to escorts. I send face/clothed body shots. Its not Grindr, but they do have a right to see who they are meeting. 

YOU are the exception!

99% of potential clients DON'T send pictures at all under any circumstances!

Edited July 3 by marylander1940

[SirBillybob]

28 minutes ago, pubic_assistance said:

I send face/clothed body shots.

I did that too when a resident of Lilliput. I don’t want anybody tied down. 

Edited July 3 by SirBillybob

[Archangel]

21 minutes ago, dbar123 said:

escorts who want to have a conversation prior to hiring

I never found one of those! Most of them seem like they’d bill you by the second for planning if they could. 

[jcmiami1]

I just sent a pic of me to a rentmasseur provider just because he texted me a dozen of his. He was ok with me - meeting tomorrow. Normally I don’t just kinda of have to feel the potential provider out first.

[sky]

On 7/2/2025 at 2:51 PM, KensingtonHomo said:

While I maintain that sex work is work and should be decriminalized or legalized, it's not the same as going to the barber or even getting a massage. While some providers may well be trying to monetize their sex lives, I suspect most who ask for a pic are trying to get a sense of the person they'll be meeting.

Hiring an escort definitely isn't the same as going to a barber or even getting a massage.  We are hiring them to "act" out a fantasy for us, meaning most times we want or expect them to get undressed and sexually engage with us in one way or another.  While I understand that some want to get a sense of the person they'll be meeting we are hiring them.  If they are getting into this industry they need to understand the territory that comes with it including being able to service anyone who hires them if they want the money.  If they aren't interested in that then they should find a different industry in my opinion.  

[Nightowl]

1 hour ago, dbar123 said:

I don’t mind sending a head shot that’s already in the public domain. What I really loathe are the escorts who want to have a conversation prior to hiring. I just don’t want to work that hard for a hookup

A new provider once tried to FaceTime me.  It was a bridge too far.

[SirBillybob]

I recently had a consultation with Ophthalmology in my province and paid a substantial user fee in spite of having socialized medicine coverage status. I had yearly such consultations fully insured over a lengthy period up to a decade ago in a different province and wanted a review. I had been fortunate to have a unique eye disease completely in remission. He expressed mild irritation and proclaimed that I shouldn’t have passed through the gauntlet he described as influencing the criteria for consultation given changes in population dynamics that affected supply and demand. I responded that it wasn’t my problem but still wanted the check-up and expressed to him that his suggestions about alternatives be delivered with an improved bedside manner. Done and dusted. The delivery could have been better but the circumstances were legitimate in terms of how to allocate eye care resources in the current context. The latter part, exclusionary, was not unprofessional because my eyes are healthy and the dozens of people waiting in the clinic certainly appeared to be in greater need. This is just an example within my frame of reference.

I myself have historically turned away referrals that would not have benefitted from the range of skills and expertise I possessed. Some commercial sex workers as prospective or initial specialized care recipients have truncated, by mutual agreement, their engagement for lack of an established template that could be applied to achieving their goals. Sometimes the reach exceeds the grasp. They would never assert that I shouldn’t be considered as professional. 

A man’s body is subject to two evolutionary imperatives, in many ways competing. One is to sexually function according to a circumscribed arousal template; in simplistic terms procreatively but with subjective pleasure driving the activity. The other is to not have genital arousal the bulk of the time, non-erection for the sake of biological physiological reproductive integrity. Priapism is not good. Assuming that the only man attached to an erect penis is aroused man is a logical fallacy. Failing to master on-demand requirements for ease of shifting between the two imperatives seems to be labelled by some punters as unprofessional.

So a unique capacity for unadulterated sexual function is framed as the criterion for professionalism. So what? I don’t sort and hire candidates in this way. It’s him and me. I’m not joining a movement that governs a 1:1 contract. I’m having fun and I hope everybody else is.

Edited July 3 by SirBillybob

[+ Jamie21]

I prefer clients NOT sending me their picture. I like the surprise. If they want to send it then fine, they can do so but I definitely don’t need it nor do I want pics of cock / ass etc. I think sometimes they’re fishing for compliments, or I’ve had a few who think that once I see their picture I’ll immediately offer them a free service (that never happens). In my experience those who send pics, especially of a close up cock / ass never actually book. They just get off on the thought of a session. I mean what can you respond to a cock or bum pic with other than ‘thanks’?  You’re hiring me, you get to see my pics and if you like it you hire. What you look like doesn’t affect how I treat you. That’s why I’m doing this work. 

[SirBillybob]

That a provider has absolutely no requirement for a preview of clients’ appearance is not in the least bit a criterion that comes into play in my shopping. It may have the appearance of being a cut above. There seems to be some desperation running through these threads in terms of attempting to define a uniformly best fit between the overall dual categories of provider and client according to whether a provider sorts his work or not. Sorting is pretty much all that clients do, so not surprising that providers’ selectivity is just an additional bone of contention.

[urbanfetish]

On 7/2/2025 at 2:51 PM, KensingtonHomo said:

Unless you're someone with no social media presence, there are likely photos of you that can be easily found.

They would have to have my real name and cell for that. I only use a fake name and a voip number for massages and escorts.

At most, I will give them my stats - age/height/weight. If they don't want to meet me because I'm overweight or whatever, I'll just find someone else who wants my money.  

[Nightowl]

1 hour ago, Jamie21 said:

I prefer clients NOT sending me their picture. I like the surprise. If they want to send it then fine, they can do so but I definitely don’t need it nor do I want pics of cock / ass etc. I think sometimes they’re fishing for compliments, or I’ve had a few who think that once I see their picture I’ll immediately offer them a free service (that never happens). In my experience those who send pics, especially of a close up cock / ass never actually book. They just get off on the thought of a session. I mean what can you respond to a cock or bum pic with other than ‘thanks’?  You’re hiring me, you get to see my pics and if you like it you hire. What you look like doesn’t affect how I treat you. That’s why I’m doing this work. 

The appropriate response to the cock pic: “Is that all there is?”

[pubic_assistance]

7 hours ago, marylander1940 said:

99% of potential clients DON'T send pictures at all under any circumstances!

Is that true ? 

I can't be THAT much of an outlier.

I understand that some people only use escorts services because they are so unattractive that nobody would fuck them for free...so being rejected by their last chance at getting laid would be humiliating and sad. 

But the guys who I seek are good looking enough that they can pick and choose the clients they want. So I dont mind the momentary gatekeeping if it gets me what I want.

[josh282282]

8 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

but they do have a right to see who they are meeting. 

Could you elaborate on how/when escorts achieved this societal "right" to get pictures of potential clients? 

I've never heard of this before and I'd like to learn more.  

[+ Jamie21]

8 hours ago, Nightowl said:

The appropriate response to the cock pic: “Is that all there is?”

😂, although some guys I’ve met would LOVE that response. They’ve got a micro cock and get off on it being humiliated!

I remember a guy whose cock was tiny, even when hard. I rubbed it between my index finger and thumb, sucking it was like I had the last little bit of a straw in my mouth (he shot a big load though). He got off by me putting mine next to his and showing him the contrast. At first I wasn’t comfortable with humiliating him about it but he was insistent he wanted that so I tried to ride him (obviously unsuccessfully) 😂. He absolutely loved it. Told me afterwards the micro cock was a medical condition. 

[+ purplekow]

Fat, bald over 60. Who wants a picture of that?   Either you can try to get hard for it or you can not.  So, if you can not perform on this particular stage, I can get a stand in.  

I do not like taking pictures and would avoid it under most social settings.  I am not sending one to an escort.  If he does not want the appointment after we meet or without a picture, that is on him.  Usually the escort is coming to me. so I can go back to Netflix as he leaves.

Ultimately it is his loss of income and the loss of having his world rocked by this fat, bald man over 60.

[Nightowl]

1 hour ago, Jamie21 said:

😂, although some guys I’ve met would LOVE that response. They’ve got a micro cock and get off on it being humiliated!

I remember a guy whose cock was tiny, even when hard. I rubbed it between my index finger and thumb, sucking it was like I had the last little bit of a straw in my mouth (he shot a big load though). He got off by me putting mine next to his and showing him the contrast. At first I wasn’t comfortable with humiliating him about it but he was insistent he wanted that so I tried to ride him (obviously unsuccessfully) 😂. He absolutely loved it. Told me afterwards the micro cock was a medical condition. 

I’ve got to give these guys credit for accepting their lot in life and making the most of their situation!

[pubic_assistance]

4 hours ago, purplekow said:

Fat, bald over 60. Who wants a picture of that? 

Well...for the purpose of this conversation: Its the person who youre asking to have sex with you !

Everyone can take ONE good photo. One of my childhood girlfriends is now very fat. I still love her and am overjoyed when I see here. I don't think I could fuck her..but I still think she's sweet.She has some nice face.pix that she uses for her job. (LinkedIN) etc

[pubic_assistance]

8 hours ago, josh282282 said:

Could you elaborate on how/when escorts achieved this societal "right" to get pictures of potential clients? 

Well...according to some of the gentlemen here...its a new ask...but the providers have always had a right to run their business as they see fit. 

Same with deposits. Just say no. (If you dont like it).

[d.anders]

On 7/3/2025 at 10:22 AM, Archangel said:

There are many guys who act like it’s our privilege to pay them to deign to fuck us.

I don't shop for penetration, but some guys only want model types sucking their cock. They think it's the only way to get and keep their cock hard. I get the fantasy. I also understand physical attraction. To each his own. Truth is, if I find a particular guy hot, and he requests a photo, I send it, because you never know. The beauty of being old is I don't care about rejection.