What level of restaurant and hotel do you go with providers?

[Dingdi]

Planning to have a lunch with an escort for the first time. A little bit hesitant when it comes to choosing restaurant. 

When you dine out with providers, what level of restaurant do you go? I know a high end restaurant with experience wine won’t be wrong. What about those regular ones with good vibes?

Same question for hotel selection.

Do providers usually expect everything treated to be luxury? Will I be looked down on if what I offered is just moderate?

Looking forward to your voice. 

[Rod Hagen]

14 minutes ago, Dingdi said:

Do providers usually expect everything treated to be luxury? Will I be looked down on if what I offered is just moderate?

When a couple's dinner at Spago or 21 Club (RIP) was $150, it was worth a splurge to spoil your new friend.  Now that equivalents hover at $500 for two, why break the bank? If moderate is what works for you, do that.   

[DznNYC]

Provider perspective:  

Not expecting luxury!  A sensible lunch, with a range of dietary options, in a pleasant casual atmosphere is more than enough. 

When it comes to hotel needs?  I would say:  clean, private, and in a convenient location.  Luxury is never the expectation!  But a convenient accessible location is everything!

[jackcali]

I wouldn't obsess too much about what the escort thinks of your choice, though it should be reasonable.  For a first-time meeting with an escort, I think the Spago treatment is completely out of line.  After all, who knows if you'll like him (or him you).  On the other hand, if it's a regular of years standing, a blowout dinner can be fun, but not because you're trying to impress the escort.  Rather it's an acknowledgement of the depth of your relationship.  

For a more practical answer, when I host in a hotel, it's usually because I'm traveling on business, so I stay at relatively nice hotels.  If I'm hiring specifically for the purpose, then any of the chain hotels are adequate.  If I'm taking a new escort out to lunch or dinner, I wouldn't take him to a place I'd take a client but rather to a place I'd go with a co-worker or business friend, so someplace good but not pricey.  That said, the best meal I ever had with an escort was takeout from In-N-Out Burger, mostly because it fueled an overnight of almost non-stop fucking.  Oh, to be young(er) again!

Edited April 15 by jackcali

[BrickBuilder]

1 hour ago, jackcali said:

hat said, the best meal I ever had with an escort was takeout from In-N-Out Burger, mostly because it fueled an overnight of almost non-stop fucking. 

If a provider has an issue with any place you select to dine, then you probably selected the wrong provider.  Since he is not paying, he really needs content going anywhere.  One of the best meals I ever had was at a downtown late night Philly diner - - pancakes, waffles, eggs, good ole comfort food - - after we had our fun (the hotel happened to be the old Ritz on 17th street but the diner was a different world).

Now hotels are a bit different.  Mid to upper scale (can be boutique or chain).  Clean and not seedy.  Easy to get to (in some cities that means public transit or convenient parking).

Honestly if the provider is more worried about the number of stars in the guidebook than the company in front of him, he probably has words like "elite" or "selective" or "premium" in his ad...and all those are red flag trigger words.  DANGER WILL ROBINSON DANGER.

[+ pizzaBoy]

I worry about this too, but I'm getting over it. I think anything between Motel 6 and the Waldorf Astoria is acceptable. I'm meeting my guy at a Doubletree this weekend; we'll imbibe and dine at the hotel lounge and restaurant. He's dessert. 😋

[MscleLovr]

1 hour ago, Dingdi said:

Will I be looked down on if what I offered is just moderate?

No, absolutely not. I’d just ask the guy in advance about any dietary constraints (vegan, gluten-free etc)

You might check your plans with the guy first. I always preferred to get physical before eating, and so work up an appetite (and I had bottoms thank me for being considerate).

[Starlight77]

True story....I hired a hot escort who was traveling to see my by train.  I told him I would pick him up at the train station,  go out to dinner, then go back to my place.  The restaurant I made a reservation at for us was swarming with cops when we showed up....apparently some sort of arrest warrant was out for one of the staff.  We couldn't go in and I was a bit embarrassed but the escort was extremely nice and understanding and he said,  "hey its totally OK...let's just go there".....he pointed at the McDonalds across the street.   I was like....what?   he laughed and smiled and said..."I'm a sucker for a good Big Mac".  And thats what we did,  then went back to my house for hours of fun.  

 

[+ Jamie21]

I’ve been taken to Annabel’s in Berkeley Square (private high end London club  for those not familiar) by a client, and to a chain coffee shop for a coffee and cake. It really doesn’t matter (although it did feel special at the club…the toilets are astonishing!) it’s the company that matters most. That said, I prefer an out call at a quality hotel rather than a lower end chain hotel. It just somehow feels a bit downbeat at those chain hotels. The walls are thin too. 

[BaronArtz]

If I host at a hotel, it usually is a mid priced place that I find on the Dayuse.app.  I live in NyC and would never ever host at my apartment.

From time to time I take out one of my two favorite regulars out to lunch or brunch - always at Dowlings at the Carlyle or Milos in Hudson Yards.  These restaurants offer amazing value and a great decor.  Carlyle and Milos fall in the affordable luxury market segment.  

[+ azdr0710]

If a client feels the need to impress a provider with ultra-upscale lodging and food, there may be some personal insecurity the client needs to evaluate.  A very well-known provider and I were walking thru a popular mall one day and we needed to eat. I was thinking of an average sit-down chain spot when the provider pointed to a Five Guys in the food court and said he'd never eaten at one. Lunch decision solved. This same provider mentioned being entertained by a client at a trendy upscale Beverly Hills "restaurant of the moment" and receiving a main course plate with a shockingly small amount of real food. This provider very definitely does not need to be impressed (and I'm grateful for that) 😁 

[aiseeya]

5 hours ago, Dingdi said:

Planning to have a lunch with an escort for the first time. A little bit hesitant when it comes to choosing restaurant. 

When you dine out with providers, what level of restaurant do you go? I know a high end restaurant with experience wine won’t be wrong. What about those regular ones with good vibes?

Same question for hotel selection.

Do providers usually expect everything treated to be luxury? Will I be looked down on if what I offered is just moderate?

Looking forward to your voice. 

If your main aim is to impress a provider, THE sure way is by giving him excessively massive cash tips - or a high end jewelry or a watch. No one will say no to a Patek.

Otherwise, its him, the provider, who should strive to impress you - your job is to be respectful and pay for his service. His job is to peform within agreed parameter.

That said, I would always go for places with great food, doesnt have to be a michelin, just gotta be great food. Or new resto that I wanted to try. Went to dessert bars couple times - had even bought ice cream to eat whilst walking on beach, spent hours just waking and talking. Its all about the connection. My reguler would sometime meet me on super casual clothing, tee and gym short at public park.

As far as accomodatiob, now this is where I would splurge. Pick your accomodation based on what you plan to do in the evening....do you need a bathtub? Jacuzzi? King size bed (for obvious reason)? Balcony (for late night talk before bed or smoke)? Extra spacey room (for 3s)? 24hr room services? Good sound proofing (especially for rough play)? Good room service (for extra towels)? Full set kitchen (I once cook late night snack after play with provider)? Or private pool (for overnight)?

IMO for consideration, a suite in a 4 stars might be a better option than a standard room in a 5stars. A service apartment (that operates like a hotel) is also often a great option.

 

[NJF]

I have taken one of my regular to two Jose Andreas’ spots in the DMV area. Both were casual and relaxing places. The small plate menu offered a huge selection of delicious foods. The waiters were also cute but my companion was cuter lol. 

Edited April 16 by NJF
Fixing typo

[jimbosf]

When I lived in San Francisco, I had someone I would see on a regular basis.  After playtime we would always go out for dinner together.  I usually let him decide on the restaurant.  He is Thai and always preferred Asian restaurants.  There are many excellent restaurants in the Bay Area, but he had his favorites and would always choose one of them.  They were moderately priced.  I would always entertain my special friends at my apartment in the City unless I was traveling.  

[Luv2play]

Years ago when I was working and travelled a lot overseas I was always booked into 5 star hotels in places like London, Paris, Geneva and Brussels. I ate at very good high end restaurants all on the boss’s dime. 
 

Then I retired and came back to earth. But that didn’t mean staying at cheap hotels or dining in chain fast food places. I choose hotels with an eye on value for money. So like another poster above I will go for the better rooms in a four star rather than a standard room in a 5 star.

I will eat at a good restaurant that has real table cloths, a maître d’ and good wine list but avoid overpriced trendy places that are pretentious. If I don’t know the restaurant before going in I ask to see the menu before choosing to stay (assuming there are other good choices in the area). This wouldn’t work if I am driving. 
 

As for the provider I will make suggestions in advance about the dining options and make sure the type of food served is acceptable for dietary reasons. I draw the line at vegetarian or vegan places. If that is their only choice I skip the meal part of the date and go straight to fucking. 

[mtaabq]

I once secured the services of a provider at a Starbucks in Tempe so that cost me $5 (back then) for some fancy iced tea. After we had our fun (at a Courtyard by Marriott) I agreed to give him a ride and he asked if I would buy him In & Out. There's another $10. That was no problem and he was a nice man. 

In Dallas I once had a provider tell me that he didn't meet customers at the Hampton Inn (where I was staying), but I have always thought he was looking to get out of the appointment rather than having a genuine objection to my choice of accommodations. An hour later another provider said to me, "The Hampton Inn Market Center? No problem. That's easy for me to get to and easy to get in and out of. See you soon." We went at it hard during a thunderstorm and it was great. 

In Las Vegas I've learned that a lot of providers sometimes prefer the smaller off-strip properties as they can be easier to get to and easier to get into.

It pretty much comes down to confidence and courtesy. From both parties. 

I hope that's all on-topic. 

[italianboyph]

I’ve gone to different places with clients. Everything from fast food to casual to nice restaurants.  

[pubic_assistance]

I agree with many of the sentiments above. If you want to treat your provider well...tip well.

Flaunting your wealth with five star hotels and over-priced Michelin Star restaurants only leads to emotionally separating yourself from your evening's companion.

A pleasant hotel room, with a degree of privacy, works just fine. Dinner, when I am traveling is always the choice of my provider. I will throw out a few suggestions and let him pick what he likes. I prefer a companion to think I spent my money on HIM, not the sushi.

Edited April 16 by pubic_assistance
grammar

[jeezifonly]

If you choose a spot where you and friends/colleagues might go, be prepared to make introductions should any of them happen to be there… 🥂

[Dingdi]

Thank you for all of your sharing and suggestions. I’m pretty much relieved. I’m really not a fan of Michelin star restaurants or molecular cuisine. 

[marylander1940]

On 4/15/2025 at 10:48 AM, Dingdi said:

Planning to have a lunch with an escort for the first time. A little bit hesitant when it comes to choosing restaurant. 

When you dine out with providers, what level of restaurant do you go? I know a high end restaurant with experience wine won’t be wrong. What about those regular ones with good vibes?

Same question for hotel selection.

Do providers usually expect everything treated to be luxury? Will I be looked down on if what I offered is just moderate?

Looking forward to your voice. 

Are you planning to "play" with him before or after or this is nothing but lunch?

If you pick a high end restaurant, will you ask him to be dressed in a certain way? 

 

[marylander1940]

35 minutes ago, Dingdi said:

Thank you for all of your sharing and suggestions. I’m pretty much relieved. I’m really not a fan of Michelin star restaurants or molecular cuisine. 

me neither... molecular cuisine is weird!

[Mo Mason]

I'm glad you asked this question because after reading through the responses I can tell you that I have overspent by thousands of dollars since I started hiring.  I've always sought 4-star accommodations for hosting and now I see that it probably was not necessary.  From now on I will try to book 2-to-3 stars so that I can use the savings to give better tips.

[+ nycman]

I always prefer to offer dinner after I’ve met the escort and we’ve done the deed. That way I can pick an appropriate restaurant based on his mode of dress. Wife beater and short-shorts? Yeah, we’re not going to La Bernadin dressed like that. I did once have an escort in Vegas show up dressed to the Nines. I was stunned when I opened the door. He noticed my reaction and said "word on the street is I might get a great meal if I dress up", so I guess my reputation preceded me.

If I’m planning on dinner, I also make sure I have various outfits prepared for a low, mid, and high range dinner. Showing up at Taco Bell in a 3 piece Armani suit is almost as embarrassing as showing up at Daniel in a Tie-die T-shirt and jeans. Although I like fancy restaurants, it’s much more important that we’re both comfortable and having fun. 

I’ve also been told "I only bottomed because your sheets were so nice". You never know what’s going to turn a dude on (or off). Just do you. Read the room and make minor adjustments as needed. If he’s the right dude, and it’ll be a match naturally. Just like sex, faking it or forcing it, never really works. 

Edited April 19 by nycman

[Whippoorwill]

I had a young fellow I used to see in Puerto Vallarta, and all he ever wanted to eat was pizza and coke. That's one of the clues I got that I should be going out with slightly older guys.