Anybody else fall for the men they hire?

[+ SirBillybob]

Going the other way, I think I’ve only gone as far as mitigating a stricken look by exclaiming “I luv you … pant pant omg omg gasp gasp … sucking/ fucking/ /pulling/ tweaking /pumping/ pounding /railing exactly the way I like!”  

[SubNick]

I fell in love with an escort. We've been together for 18 months.. He stopped escorting. I'm helpng him go back to school. Luckily, I can afford it. I don't doubt that part of his attraction to me is that I have money, but I really believe we have a great sexual chemistry and a real emotional depth in our connection.  He's one of the kindest people I've ever met, and I feel like we take care of each other in beautiful ways. 

Edited August 10 by SubNick

[The Dude]

I've never been in love with an escort, but I've definitely been in lust with a few.

[Mark_fl]

Late to this party, but definitely got a strong attachment to my escort. I think having him for the weekend and sleeping in the same bed makes it stronger as well. This is the danger of a BFE. He's paid to act as if he loves you. And if he does it well, why wouldn't you love him back? He's sexy, there to please you, and gives you full attention. So if you have some good conversations,  it's easy to convince yourself there is more there.

But I'm not stupid. I've paid for this performance. And I'm glad he's on the other side of the country or I could see myself spending way too much money on this fantasy.

What concerns me though is that he's much younger, and in addition to wanting him in my life romantically,  I feel protective and paternal toward him, which feels creepy to me.

[Danny-Darko]

Caveat emptor! 

[savantsav]

3 hours ago, Danny-Darko said:

Caveat emptor! 

and all I want is that D constantly so what's the problem? Haha

[MassageCommunityMember]

On 8/9/2025 at 10:01 PM, SubNick said:

I fell in love with an escort. We've been together for 18 months.. He stopped escorting. I'm helpng him go back to school. Luckily, I can afford it. I don't doubt that part of his attraction to me is that I have money, but I really believe we have a great sexual chemistry and a real emotional depth in our connection.  He's one of the kindest people I've ever met, and I feel like we take care of each other in beautiful ways. 

How is this going? 

[SubNick]

On 11/17/2025 at 12:57 PM, MassageCommunityMember said:

How is this going? 

still great. Mutual care and love and hot sex. 

[Rudynate]

I just wrapped up a  weird situation with an escort.  This guy approached me on A4A - a very attractive guy, 28 yo.  Initially, he didn't identify himself as a pro, but when I expressed interest, he revealed that he was a pro.   I didn't like the deception, but,  I thought, "I don't like it, but I can live with it."  We started interacting by text to get better acquainted, and to talk about cost.  But his initial pretense remained an issue for me, even though I didn't say anything.  And then he kept doing little deceptive things, that I didn't like.  Another thing that I didn't like is that he wanted full payment up front, no cash.  But paying him turned out to be this huge chore because the payment apps kept refusing the transaction.  Every time one of these things happened, I would think, "This just doesn't smell right," and I would bail.  But he would plead with me not to bail, and I would change my mind, because he was "just my type." Finally, he told me he would take payment in gift cards, which solved the problem of paying him and we, finally, made an appointment. But my instinct was telling me that this guy was bad news, and I needed to walk away and I decided, "OK, I'm walking and I won't change my mind." I texted him to say that I was done, and of course, he tried to talk me out of it. I told him "I'm a bad client for you. You don't want a client that is as suspicious of you as I am."  That did the trick.  But I'm not sure that I have seen the last of him.  You couldn't really say that he was an escort more like a con.  It's a jungle out there.

 

Edited Wednesday at 02:24 AM by Rudynate
add content

[Nue2thegame]

41 minutes ago, Rudynate said:

I just wrapped up a  weird situation with an escort.  This guy approached me on A4A - a very attractive guy, 28 yo.  Initially, he didn't identify himself as a pro, but when I expressed interest, he revealed that he was a pro.   I didn't like the deception, but,  I thought, "I don't like it, but I can live with it."  We started interacting by text to get better acquainted, and to talk about cost.  But his initial pretense remained an issue for me, even though I didn't say anything.  And then he kept doing little deceptive things, that I didn't like.  Another thing that I didn't like is that he wanted full payment up front, no cash.  But paying him turned out to be this huge chore because the payment apps kept refusing the transaction.  Every time one of these things happened, I would think, "This just doesn't smell right," and I would bail.  But he would plead with me not to bail, and I would change my mind, because he was "just my type." Finally, he told me he would take payment in gift cards, which solved the problem of paying him and we, finally, made an appointment. But my instinct was telling me that this guy was bad news, and I needed to walk away and I decided, "OK, I'm walking and I won't change my mind." I texted him to say that I was done, and of course, he tried to talk me out of it. I told him "I'm a bad client for you. You don't want a client that is as suspicious of you as I am."  That did the trick.  But I'm not sure that I have seen the last of him.  You couldn't really say that he was an escort more like a con.  It's a jungle out there.

 

Run, Rudy, run.

[SecretProvider]

I have had to cut clients off because they became infatuated and could not distinguish reality from fiction- despite me being very clear: I am not opposed to dating a client but I would need to be provided for in that I wouldn't have to work. 

[Nue2thegame]

I have fallen in love with a provider several times…….but only for an hour or two. 

[+ sf westcoaster]

Never fallen in love, but have certainly made some ongoing connections and friendships.

 

[nottheworst]

I also experienced something similar to most ppl here but maybe I ended up  differently (or it was my decision to cure my heart). It has been a while since we first met. That was a summer night when everything in my life was on their trajectory, I decided to meet him who I admired long ago. We are about the same age. The first date was not that impressive to me or I could say he was not my cup of tea as I thought. However, after we talked, I knew more about him, I knew his stories and understood what he has been through. I felt for him. Someone may say I was too emotional or overthought everything. I must confess that yes I am but I am also practical and materialistic. I know what I am doing and I rarely let my heart decide my mind. I felt for him because I was somehow in his situations and somebody gave me a hand. At that moment, I just purely wanted to give him a hand. However, I did not foresee everything would become like this now. If you asked me whether I would regret or not, it would be no. If I had to choose again, I would still do the same. The thing here is the more times we met, the more I couldn't help my heart from falling for him. He was kind to me, and I knew sometime I was unreasonable and clingy. We had a fight but I made up. After that, we understood each other more. I used to ask him about our relationship, I knew I would not get the answer I wanted but some parts of me still had hope for it. He said he also liked me and I knew he meant it but maybe that was not enough for us to be together. I understood because that was also not my initial intention. I used to promise myself that after his life gets better, I will leave and I believe it is time for me to put myself first. It is just sad that we were together in the darkest time but could not after that. After all, I won't regret what I have done, all the times with him will be my most beautiful memory. He was the first person I have dated and maybe the last. We also did a lot of first things in my life, just unfortunately we could not end up together. 

[mrkileen]

On 6/13/2024 at 7:35 PM, Rgsnva said:

Just wondering if anybody else does this dumb thing or if it’s just me.  I only started hiring about 3 years ago, but I can see a pattern. (Okay, only twice, but still…). When I hire a man repeatedly because there’s great intimacy (at least from my perspective, I start to lose my grip on the reality and develop feelings.  I misread cues and think there’s a mutual thing developing.  Then the reality has to hit home that I’m not a romantic interest or even a hookup interest and I wouldn’t be there if I wasn’t paying. The man I currently see regularly - he pushes all my buttons physically and emotionally, and I could fall head over heels for him.  But I see him in rooms with guys who are hookups, not clients, and he talks about trips in which he meets someone in a room, they chat and are hot for each other, and travel to meet.  And it has to hit me then that I’m not one of those guys he met because he was attracted to them.  Big blow on both my ego and my heart.  Anybody else? Thoughts? Suggestions? And you don’t need to tell me it’s all my own fault - I already own that.  

If you fall for them then they are good at their job. Don't confuse your feelings with theirs. I am very aware that absent payment, none of who I've hired would ever look my way or talk to me. Im glad I've been fortunate to enjoy what I have. If you can't get the person of your dreams the next best thing would be to pay for one? 

[+ purplekow]

58 minutes ago, mrkileen said:

If you fall for them then they are good at their job. Don't confuse your feelings with theirs. I am very aware that absent payment, none of who I've hired would ever look my way or talk to me. Im glad I've been fortunate to enjoy what I have. If you can't get the person of your dreams the next best thing would be to pay for one? 

Out of the many I have hired, I have about ten escorts that I hired for a prolonged period of time.  I was, essentially,  a serial monogamous escort hirer. who occasionally strayed to others for variety.    I am still in contact with all ten of these men to a greater or lesser extent.  I consider then acquaintance at one end and friends at the other.  It is as though I dated them and it did not work out but we remained friends.  In fact, one of them just spent a week at my home on a trip from one coast to the other.  

That being said, I have never had sex with these men off the clock and once :I stopped hiring them, when we are together, there is not an attempt to get together sexually.  

So, even though at the time I was seeing them, I may have fantasized about being in love, these relationships evolved, as most sexual relationships do into less desire and more routine.  None of them evolved into love.  And though most of them remain in great shape and very sexy, I have never considered returning to our previous arrangement.   One of them did stay at my home for a few days and made a point of walking around naked and at least a bit aroused, but while he looked great I had no desire to pay for sex with him and did not try to get there for free.