Negative vs Negative on Prep

[Owen FL]

When a provider lists negative instead of negative on Prep, does that generally mean they are not on Prep but get tested? I am just trying to understand why someone would not list they are on Prep if they are actually on it….

somewhat new and only people I have met have listed themselves on Prep but there are some without it listed catching my eye

[Cliff]

3 minutes ago, Owen FL said:

When a provider lists negative instead of negative on Prep, does that generally mean they are not on Prep but get tested? I am just trying to understand why someone would not list they are on Prep if they are actually on it….

somewhat new and only people I have met have listed themselves on Prep but there are some without it listed catching my eye

Whenever I see a provider state “Negative” instead of “Negative on PReP,” that’s a clear indication to me that while he may have tested negative at some point in his life, he is not on PReP. I also assume, just to be somewhat sensible and realistic about it, that all providers may be positive and not necessarily honest about it, and I base my actions and behavior on the most clear headed thinking I can muster. My two cents. 

[MikeH10]

totally agree with Cliff's take above. when i see it i usually interpret two things from it: 

1/ they're allegedly negative but may not test as frequently, compared to someone who's on PrEP gets tested at minimum every 3 months. 

2/ i take it as an indirect signal that they aren't as open to barebacking (compared to someone on PrEP who might list 'Ask Me' or 'Anything Goes').... it's a more anecdotal observation, but i've found it to be the case more often than not. 

[NJF]

There were more providers listed as positive undetectable in the past but a lot of them now left the health status section blank.

Edited March 20 by NJF

[Your Man in Arlington]

8 hours ago, Cliff said:

Whenever I see a provider state “Negative” instead of “Negative on PReP,” that’s a clear indication to me that while he may have tested negative at some point in his life, he is not on PReP. I also assume, just to be somewhat sensible and realistic about it, that all providers may be positive and not necessarily honest about it, and I base my actions and behavior on the most clear headed thinking I can muster. My two cents. 

I would agree about not taking anyone's listing at face value re: negative/PReP/positive. But, the very few providers I've met who have listed "Negative" rather than "Negative on PReP" on RM have actually proffered to be on PReP during further conversation, but just not wanting to publish that as such, FWIW. (I know for a fact I'm on PReP, taking that horse pill each morning, which is the most important part of the equation.)

[pubic_assistance]

I just assume everyone lies about their status and proceed accordingly.

[+ APPLE1]

I think lazy or ignorant are on the list as well. I have talked to many guys who really don't understand the difference between negative, PrEP, PEP, and TasP. They consider them pretty much "all the same," and as long as they check, or write, one of them, it's "good enough."

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

9 hours ago, Owen FL said:

When a provider lists negative instead of negative on Prep, does that generally mean they are not on Prep but get tested? I am just trying to understand why someone would not list they are on Prep if they are actually on it….

somewhat new and only people I have met have listed themselves on Prep but there are some without it listed catching my eye

The reality is that you need to be on a form of PrEP if you're fucking or being fucked by another man.  It's readily available almost everywhere now.

Both escorts and clients alike lie to themselves and each other about their sexual responsibility.

Only you can protect you.

 

[DWnyc]

Some may be pragmatic (as they see it) and assume it maximizes clientele and doesn’t put off those who could be offended by an “in your face” or sermonizing on status or prep use (same reason some undetectable on ART will only say “positive”)

We’ve discussed here before how many have not stated status accurately - we know because they themselves have volunteered this to us or in other profiles - I know at least 2 in my geography and both made some fumbling noise about having forgotten to update their profiles, I just checked and after more than a year they still provide an incorrect status (not just blank) 

At the end of the day it shouldn’t really matter if you’re already ok seeing a provider if you protect yourself per your own tolerance level - and that can mean lots of different things 

 

 

[Jamie21]

Whether or not he’s on Prep shouldn’t affect your approach. Prep protects him, not you. Nor should you take as definitive anything he says because you can’t prove he’s on Prep, you’re just taking him at his word and that’s a lot of trust for something so critical to your health.

Because of my work I take Prep daily and I really can’t imagine why anyone doing sex work wouldn’t be on Prep unless they’ve a health issue that prevents them taking it. All of the guys I know who do similar work are on it. They also include it in their advertising. 

It’s free here in UK and I get tested regularly (also free) to ensure it’s safe for me to use. 

[SirBillybob]

It’s a loose guideline. Even if all true (not wilfully distorted) to the best of lister’s knowledge, the sole unequivocal “status” delineation is ‘positive’, unless you deem the not listed option as equivocal in terms of a binary: inquire further, or … accept a range of equivocal along with the one unequivocal and optionally inquire further.

If you require absolute specificity upfront, go with the HIV poz provider. The more ambiguous the listing the greater the justification for cracking open a dyadic conversation. The alternative is to second-guess, depending on the context of activity, and be subject to overthinking and fretting about it. The drop-down menu MO is more to stimulate and encourage dialogue than to completely assuage health concerns at point of attention to ad. 

You may be essentially paying to undertake a complex task. That’s the way the cookie crumbles. The outcome of the exercise further separates the wheat from the chaff.

Edited March 20 by SirBillybob

[+ nycman]

6 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

Whether or not he’s on Prep shouldn’t affect your approach. Prep protects him, not you.

Strictly speaking, that’s not 100% true.

Someone on prep is unlikely to become infected. It is when someone is first infected that they are the most infectious to others. So the fact that the man you’re having sex with is unlikely to be in the acute HIV sero-conversion phase does in fact lower your risk dramatically.

I wouldn’t rely on it solely as it means to protect myself, but it does slow your risk. 

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

13 hours ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

Only you can protect you.

 

Yes 💯

If the client is not on PreP or doesn't use condoms during an encounter, then it's pretty irrelevant what the provider's status is.  Assume the other person is always positive and behave accordingly.  It seems half of men lie about their penis size... You don't think they'll lie about their status, too?  At least with penis size you can verify in person.

If you need the paid provider to tell you he's negative and on PreP to feel safe before hiring, then this hobby isn't for you.

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

23 hours ago, Owen FL said:

I am just trying to understand why someone would not list they are on Prep if they are actually on it….

Some people don't want to publicly disclose the medication they are taking, the vaccines they have taken, etc.  There are multiple reasons from discrimination to potential future lawsuits.  It's better to give as little personal information as possible.

[Spiritualadvisor]

A simple solution is to ask the provider to show his test results and offer to show yours. 

[Jamie21]

11 minutes ago, Spiritualadvisor said:

A simple solution is to ask the provider to show his test results and offer to show yours. 

That might offer reassurance (someone with recent test results would appear to take their sexual health seriously) but of course even if the results are a week old they’re not any guarantee he’s free from any sexually transmitted disease. I think the best thing to do is protect yourself and not worry about what anyone else is doing or says they’re doing. Stay safe and rest regularly! 

[Bokomaru]

I am negative and on Prep and I *never* list my status as such. I simply put negative. If I say that I am on prep, many (most) people automatically assume I’m willing to bareback, which is inaccurate. In my experience , saying I’m on prep also tends to attract higher risk people. At least in the hook up world.  I imagine the calculus is quite different for a provider, who has to take business considerations into account. 

[+ DrownedBoy]

5 hours ago, Vegas_Millennial said:

  There are multiple reasons from discrimination to potential future lawsuits. 

There are still 13 states that require people to reveal their STD status before sex.

Even if it was a federal law, though, I wouldn't trust it.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

7 hours ago, Spiritualadvisor said:

A simple solution is to ask the provider to show his test results and offer to show yours. 

No, it's unfortunately really not that simple.

How many people has the escort or client had sex with since the test?  

There's also a gestation period for things like HIV:  A test can give a false negative anywhere from 18 to 90 days post-exposure.

An NAT HIV test is the most surefire way to go for early detection.

Edited March 21 by BenjaminNicholas

[ShortCutie7]

Ugh, this shit is why I’m so afraid to do anal at all.  I’ve only ever done so with condoms AND partners who claimed to rarely hook up and always use condoms when they do.  But there’s no way to know how truthful guys are being.  Yet another reason a provider who we know to be highly sexually active but also more likely to be diligent about sexual health is likely safer than a stranger on Grindr.

(And for reference, the last time I bottomed was around 2016, before PreP became widespread)

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

1 hour ago, ShortCutie7 said:

 Yet another reason a provider who we know to be highly sexually active but also more likely to be diligent about sexual health is likely safer than a stranger on Grindr.

Agree 💯

[marylander1940]

On 3/19/2024 at 10:12 PM, pubic_assistance said:

I just assume everyone lies about their status and proceed accordingly.

Yes, and I did use condom still PrEP arrived and it was up to each of us to keep ourselves negative by taking  a pill a day. 

 

9 hours ago, Spiritualadvisor said:

A simple solution is to ask the provider to show his test results and offer to show yours. 

Possibly not in a first encounter because the results will show his full name, age, etc. 

[marylander1940]

12 hours ago, nycman said:

Strictly speaking, that’s not 100% true.

Someone on prep is unlikely to become infected. It is when someone is first infected that they are the most infectious to others. So the fact that the man you’re having sex with is unlikely to be in the acute HIV sero-conversion phase does in fact lower your risk dramatically.

I wouldn’t rely on it solely as it means to protect myself, but it does slow your risk. 

[+ JEC]

On 3/19/2024 at 11:32 PM, BenjaminNicholas said:

The reality is that you need to be on a form of PrEP if you're fucking or being fucked by another man.  It's readily available almost everywhere now.

Both escorts and clients alike lie to themselves and each other about their sexual responsibility.

Only you can protect you.

 

......and there are a handful of vaccinations you should get.   Then, there are a few things which there is no prevention or cure for, including Herpes.

[+ DrownedBoy]

If you're willing to wait 15 minutes, you can always take or administer a swab HIV test at a session.

However, if you're newly infected, you might not test positive for several weeks. That won't help either. Just be safe.