Client vs Gym

[The Dude]

This has happened more than once, where a guy says he can’t meet me at a certain time because he’ll be at the gym.  Why would you turn down a paying client for something you can do the other 23 fracking hours of the day?

Makes no sense to me.

[Bokomaru]

I get where you’re coming from, but off the top of my head…

Guys who are serious about the gym often like strict routines. It’s how they achieve amazing results. Some even see the gym as a job, it’s part of the work that enables them to be successful in everything else, including escorting. 

Maybe he has a trainer booked and can’t reschedule every time a possible client expresses interest. 
 

Or he has enough clients already, so doesn’t need to upset his routine to take an extra one. Not everyone wants to maximize.
 

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

18 minutes ago, The Dude said:

This has happened more than once, where a guy says he can’t meet me at a certain time because he’ll be at the gym.  Why would you turn down a paying client for something you can do the other 23 fracking hours of the day?

Makes no sense to me.

Routine is important.

My father would always turn down the opportunity to work overtime Friday nights, because that was family pizza night.   I have a friend who would turn down any paid work assignment that overlapped with football.  I can see how a provider who has scheduled gym time for the same time every day would avoid taking paid clients during that time, because gym is his time to work on his muscles and clear his mind.  And, should he skip or move gym time one day, it may soon fall off his routine altogether and ultimately result in him getting fewer clients in the long-run.

Edited February 13 by Vegas_Millennial

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

19 minutes ago, The Dude said:

This has happened more than once, where a guy says he can’t meet me at a certain time because he’ll be at the gym.  Why would you turn down a paying client for something you can do the other 23 fracking hours of the day?

Makes no sense to me.

Would a lawyer or doctor agree to an appointment at 2 a.m.?  Most would not.  They would happily forgo the extra income in order to not interrupt their daily/nightly routine.

[Jamie21]

I’ve learned that you need to set boundaries doing this work. It’s easy, and tempting to take clients at any time, even changing your plans to accommodate a client.

Unfortunately that’s a recipe for dissatisfaction because you fail to make time for important things. Keeping fit is an important part of the job, just as making time for yourself. It’s not a 9 to 5 job (thankfully) but that doesn’t mean you work anytime 7 days a week.

I carve out time to go to gym, see friends etc and I generally won’t cancel those things to see a client, especially if it’s a short notice booking, which a lot are. 

[+ DrownedBoy]

Also, some muscular escorts (including some I met)  have problems with body dysmorphia. They have a psychological need to work out to keep their bodies looking good. In the 90s we called them body fascists. 

 

Ironically,  such gym addicts often have self esteem issues. In college, I watched a skinny little twerp who knew psychology manipulate a muscular Black gym bunny and law student into his bed.

[+ APPLE1]

I fail to understand why anyone would explain WHY they aren't available. Unless we have matching wedding rings, all I need to say is "I can't meet then."

Giving details is an open invitation to question my life choices and priorities.

[Shawn Monroe]

When I was still working in office, my hours were set from 12-2 (for a lunch appointment if one came up), then 5-11. 

Once a client reached out and asked if I could meet “on my break time from 2-5” and I had to respond that I’m not just lying on the couch during that time; I was back in the office. 

just saying this to say that sometimes routine is important. Jumping at the chance to take any and every appointment can hinder other parts of your life. 

[Shawn Monroe]

There are ways to get around this - I go to the gym at 6:30 am, so it’s out of the way. That being said, I can’t take appointments after 10pm to be ready for the gym. 
 

either way I’m agreeing with everyone here - routine and boundaries are important. 

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

Because routine is important to those of us who are incredibly fit.

Lift. Rinse. Repeat.  Every day, on time (if possible).

Also, keep in mind that for some of us, money isn't the sole motivating factor because it doesn't need to be.

[viewing ownly]

Going to the gym or exercising religiously is great. Where I feel the initial reason for this post went wrong was an honest explanation of being unavailable. Just think how different OUR opinion is if we simply get a "not available at that time, how about time X instead?". We don't have to know why you're busy, we just care to know when you're available.

[SirBillybob]

9 hours ago, APPLE1 said:

I fail to understand why anyone would explain WHY they aren't available. Unless we have matching wedding rings, all I need to say is "I can't meet then."

Giving details is an open invitation to question my life choices and priorities.

 

3 hours ago, viewing ownly said:

Going to the gym or exercising religiously is great. Where I feel the initial reason for this post went wrong was an honest explanation of being unavailable. Just think how different OUR opinion is if we simply get a "not available at that time, how about time X instead?". We don't have to know why you're busy, we just care to know when you're available.

… including why use a gym without toilets.

[maninsoma]

14 hours ago, The Dude said:

This has happened more than once, where a guy says he can’t meet me at a certain time because he’ll be at the gym.  Why would you turn down a paying client for something you can do the other 23 fracking hours of the day?

Makes no sense to me.

Flip your question around: Why would you turn down an opportunity to be with a guy during the other 23 hours of the day?  Do you really only have one specific hour during which you can meet?

Your question assumes that someone else should change his schedule to accommodate you, and it's just as valid to question why you can't change your schedule to accommodate him.

[ICTJOCK]

His ego is talking rather than the need to follow a proper business plan.   My gym time is very valuable to me,  but one crafts time for both exercise and client.

What he is saying basically is,   "I'm more important than you are",   it is a sign of a non professional and I'd steer clear.     Health and fitness if very important,  but it should be set around work time.    If there is a problem with balancing both,  a "rebalance"  should be considered.     The guy who said that to you should never be considered again.

[+ Pensant]

Count me as one who doesn’t allow interruptions to my gym or outside cardio routine. It’s a key segment of my mental and physical well-being.

[Thelatin]

My last long term provider has a strict routine of getting up early, meditation, gym, diet etc.   Anytime he left that routine I could tell he was “off”.

I missed the gym a lot this week working on a project.  Now I’m feeling it. 

[+ poolboy48220]

Miss Manners recommends never giving a why when declining an invitation; it just opens the conversation for debate about whether your excuse is valid. 

[soloyo215]

16 hours ago, The Dude said:

This has happened more than once, where a guy says he can’t meet me at a certain time because he’ll be at the gym.  Why would you turn down a paying client for something you can do the other 23 fracking hours of the day?

Makes no sense to me.

Because he's entitled to manage his time as he sees it fit. I am no expert in exercising, but I do know that having a steady routine for working out is best to ensure that one maintains the body properly, body that BTW is giving him his clients.

Think of it as times when businesses are closed to clients for staff training or maintenance. That is his training and maintenance time. That should be respected. It's not that he's rejecting you (assuming that he's expressing availability at a different time).

Edited February 14 by soloyo215

[marylander1940]

16 hours ago, The Dude said:

This has happened more than once, where a guy says he can’t meet me at a certain time because he’ll be at the gym.  Why would you turn down a paying client for something you can do the other 23 fracking hours of the day?

Makes no sense to me.

 

Did you offer to meet the escort 1 hour later or whenever he as free that day? 

1 minute ago, poolboy48220 said:

Miss Manners recommends never giving a why when declining an invitation; it just opens the conversation for debate about whether your excuse is valid. 

Maybe it was an excuse, he had another client and politely told you he wasn't available. It takes 2 to tango!

 

[marylander1940]

2 hours ago, ICTJOCK said:

His ego is talking rather than the need to follow a proper business plan.   My gym time is very valuable to me,  but one crafts time for both exercise and client.

What he is saying basically is,   "I'm more important than you are",   it is a sign of a non professional and I'd steer clear.     Health and fitness if very important,  but it should be set around work time.    If there is a problem with balancing both,  a "rebalance"  should be considered.     The guy who said that to you should never be considered again.

Besides plenty of free time to go to the gym after!

I know escorts who go to the gym at noon but if a client wants that specific time they'll go to the gym before or after accommodating themselves. It's their choice to prioritize $ and they're happy to do it! 

 

 

Edited February 14 by marylander1940

[Simon Suraci]

I work in my gym time around clients as much as possible. As long as clients are booking ahead it’s no problem. I don’t really care what time of day I go, as long as I go.

Sometimes a client contacts me for something last minute when I am already at the gym and I have to tell them I can meet in an hour, counting finishing my routine, showering, and getting back. They get ruffled that I’m not on call 24/7 and that I can’t teleport. Sorry guys, if you didn’t plan ahead and you only have the same hour that you’re contacting me to meet…that’s on you.

[borgerback]

1 hour ago, Simon Suraci said:

I work in my gym time around clients as much as possible. As long as clients are booking ahead it’s no problem. I don’t really care what time of day I go, as long as I go.

Sometimes a client contacts me for something last minute when I am already at the gym and I have to tell them I can meet in an hour, counting finishing my routine, showering, and getting back. They get ruffled that I’m not on call 24/7 and that I can’t teleport. Sorry guys, if you didn’t plan ahead and you only have the same hour that you’re contacting me to meet…that’s on you.

This.  It's almost never 'right away' and that should be completely understandable.  The problem is, in general (e.g., please don't pile on gentlemen, I'm generalizing), folks looking through the connection sites are getting riled up to want 'right away' so any perceived delay is frustrating.

I know a planned and relaxed encounter is almost always better than a frenzied 'right away' but I still sometimes want what I want right then.  Count it part of the instant gratification culture, only enhanced in our psyche by technology.  Anyone else here remember having to wait for a spell check program to run?

As to keeping to a strict routine, I'm a believer - for those who desire that precise schedule discipline, I support it.

As to not providing an excuse (per Poolboy) I generally agree, although again I've felt the pressure of needing to give an excuse, particularly if I know the person I'm flaking on well.  Also, there could be a bit of 'hey I'm at the gym to make myself pleasurable/presentable to you' in the response.

As always though, I applaud Mr. Suraci and Mr. Nicholas on their thoughtful positions.

[Whippoorwill]

Hey, Macys is open 10 AM to 9 PM. If I want to shop there, that's when I go. What's so hard to understand about that? I don't have to know or care about what the clerk is doing from 9 PM to 10 AM, it's none of my business. If I think I absolutely need to buy x or y in other hours, I am free to shop around. In our society, there are lots of choices. If a provider absolutely needs your patronage, he can make himself available according to your schedule.  If not, you can adjust to his schedule or shop elsewhere. Simple. 

[blck37]

Food for thought, he is avoiding to meet you.....sorta a polite decline.

[Saabster]

A few thoughts here...

1- When the provider declined the requested time, saying "sorry I'm not available then" or "I have another appointment" should have been sufficient. Some folks are prone to oversharing. We don't need to know whether he's at the gym, doing laundry, seeing another client, visiting his mom, etc.

2- The provider should have proposed an alternate time. "I can't meet you at 2pm, but how about after 4pm?" If he didn't then take that as a no.

3- We as clients shouldn't get upset when someone isn't available the exact time we want them. I would try to have a range of time in my request ("Are you available between 1pm-6pm?")