Providers - how often do you get stiffed?

[+ DrownedBoy]

Not in the physical sense - I mean in the monetary.

I was wondering - how many clients try to get out of reimbursing what they promised? Are you generally able to convince them? And if not, do such meetings make you lose a significant amount of money?

[Trick]

I’ve met several providers who can’t get stiff. Bummer!

[+ Jamie21]

Happened to me recently. I don’t think he intentionally did it. Was an out call to his hotel, a visitor to London from China. He offered payment by card at the start but I never accept payment until afterwards (it kills the vibe I think). So we finish the session and he’s very happy, he inserts his card but it’s declined. So I suggest another card (after trying twice) but he doesn’t have one, nor any cash. There’s a language issue too. In the end I sent a PayPal request but he couldn’t settle that immediately either. 

After that I gave up. It’s never happened to me before and I put it down to experience, because there were a couple of red flags. Strange thing is he’s not blocked me and replies to my chaser for setting the PayPal request by promising he’ll do it shortly. I think there is an issue for him regarding using his Chinese card. Anyway, I’ve written off the money (don’t tell him!). 
 

 

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

I've never been stiffed on my rate for time, but was once taken for a rather large hotel bill.

Client was a solid guy for 15+ years.  He was visiting NYC.  Suite at the Carlyle.  His card was giving him issues, so I graciously put down a cc and he agreed to make sure I was paid back.  I didn't think there'd be an issue.

There was an issue.  A $24k issue.

Moral of story:  Don't confuse being gracious and being stupid. 

I ended up getting my money back. 

From what I was told, he eventually ended up dead, pulling this same bullshit on people who weren't so understanding of his con.

[Monarchy79]

40 minutes ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

I've never been stiffed on my rate for time, but was once taken for a rather large hotel bill.

Client was a solid guy for 15+ years.  He was visiting NYC.  Suite at the Carlyle.  His card was giving him issues, so I graciously put down a cc and he agreed to make sure I was paid back.  I didn't think there'd be an issue.

There was an issue.  A $24k issue.

Moral of story:  Don't confuse being gracious and being stupid. 

I ended up getting my money back. 

From what I was told, he eventually ended up dead, pulling this same bullshit on people who weren't so understanding of his con.

You need to write a book. 

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

12 minutes ago, Monarchy79 said:

You need to write a book. 

I was approached years ago by a small, but well-known publishing house in NYC.  I was asked to write a sample chapter for them to look at.

They didn't like how I blurred the more juicy details.  They clearly wanted a tell-all (or something like one).

I said I'd be more interested in writing it as fiction.  Alluding to, but not directly pointing things out.

I tried to frame it as good for them to avoid lawsuits.  They didn't budge.

That was the end of me ever wanting to write a book.

 

[Luv2play]

11 minutes ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

I was approached years ago by a small, but well-known publishing house in NYC.  I was asked to write a sample chapter for them to look at.

They didn't like how I blurred the more juicy details.  They clearly wanted a tell-all (or something like one).

I said I'd be more interested in writing it as fiction.  Alluding to, but not directly pointing things out.

I tried to frame it as good for them to avoid lawsuits.  They didn't budge.

That was the end of me ever wanting to write a book.

 

How about a posthumous memoir?

[nate_sf]

I've only been stiffed once. It was a forum member, during one of the DC meetups. Both clients and providers warned me ahead of time that he was known to pull stunts, so I wasn't surprised when at the end of the session he claimed to have lost his wallet. He put on quite the act, trying to look panicked and all. "Where is my wallet? OMG, I've lost my wallet!!!" I just sat and watched his performance for a couple of minutes, then showed him the door. (For what it's worth, I don't believe he posts on this forum anymore, let alone attend any of the events)

[NJF]

14 hours ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

I was approached years ago by a small, but well-known publishing house in NYC.  I was asked to write a sample chapter for them to look at.

They didn't like how I blurred the more juicy details.  They clearly wanted a tell-all (or something like one).

I said I'd be more interested in writing it as fiction.  Alluding to, but not directly pointing things out.

I tried to frame it as good for them to avoid lawsuits.  They didn't budge.

That was the end of me ever wanting to write a book.

 

It is not much a hustle to self publish these days. You definitely have some unique stories 😂 that will sale well.

[Monarchy79]

16 hours ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

I was approached years ago by a small, but well-known publishing house in NYC.  I was asked to write a sample chapter for them to look at.

They didn't like how I blurred the more juicy details.  They clearly wanted a tell-all (or something like one).

I said I'd be more interested in writing it as fiction.  Alluding to, but not directly pointing things out.

I tried to frame it as good for them to avoid lawsuits.  They didn't budge.

That was the end of me ever wanting to write a book.

 

It’s unfortunately that the publishing house didn’t budge. 
 

They could have possibly considered transforming it into a set of scripts for a miniseries (TV show) or a movie. 

[Simon Suraci]

23 minutes ago, Monarchy79 said:

They could have possibly considered transforming it into a set of scripts for a miniseries (TV show) or a movie. 

Makes me think about Six Feet Under, where every episode you have a death at the beginning and it plays into the ongoing story. How entertaining would it be to have a show about hookers where you start each episode with a scene involving a new John? HBO style with gratuitous nudity (or not, entertaining either way). It would be fictional of course, just like writing a book, if not for the legal and privacy reasons, then for narrative cohesiveness and creative reasons. All you need are a few well developed characters, some story arc trajectories and the script practically writes itself. 

[BuffaloKyle]

I like to ask providers this very question when I'm paying them at the end of the session and no one so far has said it has happened to them. 😅

[nate_sf]

9 hours ago, Simon Suraci said:

Makes me think about Six Feet Under, where every episode you have a death at the beginning and it plays into the ongoing story. How entertaining would it be to have a show about hookers where you start each episode with a scene involving a new John? HBO style with gratuitous nudity (or not, entertaining either way). It would be fictional of course, just like writing a book, if not for the legal and privacy reasons, then for narrative cohesiveness and creative reasons. All you need are a few well developed characters, some story arc trajectories and the script practically writes itself. 

I love this! Someone find a scriptwriter and we can all be executive producers 🥳

[viewing ownly]

On 4/6/2024 at 4:24 PM, BenjaminNicholas said:

I was approached years ago by a small, but well-known publishing house in NYC.  I was asked to write a sample chapter for them to look at.

They didn't like how I blurred the more juicy details.  They clearly wanted a tell-all (or something like one).

I said I'd be more interested in writing it as fiction.  Alluding to, but not directly pointing things out.

I tried to frame it as good for them to avoid lawsuits.  They didn't budge.

That was the end of me ever wanting to write a book.

 

This right here could be your prologue. 🤣

[Jay_lucas]

Unfortunately, I have got stiffed a few times, including a guy that flew me out to Texas for a three day weekend and never paid me. An Overnight situation like that I think it’s fair to ask for  50% upfront ( because of issues like this). Then the rest when I’m there. I tend to not want to ask for the payment upfront when I meet a client because I don’t want them to feel uncomfortable, but I always tell them if they feel like getting out of the way just leave it on the nightstand. 
but at the end of the day, I want my clients to feel comfortable, enjoy themselves, and also not have to worry about anything. Rentmen.com  Onlyfans.com Twitter

[marylander1940]

13 hours ago, BuffaloKyle said:

I like to ask providers this very question when I'm paying them at the end of the session and no one so far has said it has happened to them. 😅

well, gentlemen always keep their word and pay their bills!

[marylander1940]

On 4/5/2024 at 6:05 PM, DrownedBoy said:

Not in the physical sense - I mean in the monetary.

I was wondering - how many clients try to get out of reimbursing what they promised? Are you generally able to convince them? And if not, do such meetings make you lose a significant amount of money?

 

I know several providers who ask payment upfront only if it's late at night, there are clear signs of PNP or any other red flags.

One of my escort friends has been stiffed $20 5 or 6 times in his over 20 years career, he also had guys who agreed on a couple of hours and 1 hour later say they're done, most of them pay for 2 hours while a few pay only 1 because that's how long they stayed. Not sure if that's "stiffing"...,

He never had a major issue of someone walking out of his place without paying but a close friend of him who used his place had it happened once.

On 4/6/2024 at 6:27 PM, BenjaminNicholas said:

I've never been stiffed on my rate for time, but was once taken for a rather large hotel bill.

Client was a solid guy for 15+ years.  He was visiting NYC.  Suite at the Carlyle.  His card was giving him issues, so I graciously put down a cc and he agreed to make sure I was paid back.  I didn't think there'd be an issue.

There was an issue.  A $24k issue.

Moral of story:  Don't confuse being gracious and being stupid. 

I ended up getting my money back. 

From what I was told, he eventually ended up dead, pulling this same bullshit on people who weren't so understanding of his con.

Karma!

I hate to say but that was Karma, he messed with the wrong guy! 

 

 

[Jmore]

The second time I hired someone, he asked if I wanted him to stay the night.  As hard as it is to believe now, at that time I didn’t realize he was asking about hiring him for the night (I thought he just liked me!).  I said I’d love it if he stayed the night.  He did and it was awesome.  In the morning, when he was ready to leave, I didn’t have any more money than what we had agreed to for the hour.  I was so embarrassed and he could tell I was sincere that I didn’t realize I would need to pay more.  He was so kind about it.  He explained how it worked but said he’d let it slide because he had a good time.  What a great guy.

[mtaabq]

On 4/6/2024 at 4:27 PM, BenjaminNicholas said:

Moral of story:  Don't confuse being gracious and being stupid. 

@BenjaminNicholas Thank you. That was something that I needed to read this morning. That is some good advice, not just for provider/customer situations, but for life in general. 😀

Edited September 4 by mtaabq
To correct a punctuation error.

[Alchemy]

An experienced provider I've seen told me he was robbed by a client. The provider went to the restroom after sex (the client had booked an overnight). But the client snuck out without paying -- and stole the escort's backpack, including phone and some clothes. Everything had seemed normal until that point. The provider told me he raced through the hotel hallway naked when he discovered the guy had left. 

[+ ThroatCummer]

On 9/4/2025 at 6:13 AM, Jmore said:

The second time I hired someone, he asked if I wanted him to stay the night.  As hard as it is to believe now, at that time I didn’t realize he was asking about hiring him for the night (I thought he just liked me!).  I said I’d love it if he stayed the night.  He did and it was awesome.  In the morning, when he was ready to leave, I didn’t have any more money than what we had agreed to for the hour.  I was so embarrassed and he could tell I was sincere that I didn’t realize I would need to pay more.  He was so kind about it.  He explained how it worked but said he’d let it slide because he had a good time.  What a great guy.

That's an amazing story actually. 

First, you learned a huge lesson on how all this works. 

Second, you really didn't know and he could read that about you. That is a very good escort. 

Lastly, if you had a great time and the chemistry and energy was there -- and he really did seem to enjoy it and was sincere in that statement -- I would hire him again in a heartbeat and offer to over-pay the next handful of times (break it up if you can't afford it) and be straight up honest about it. It's a teachable moment and you could turn out to be one of his best clients if you really valued him. 

[Peter Eater]

On 4/6/2024 at 3:27 PM, BenjaminNicholas said:

Suite at the Carlyle.  His card was giving him issues, so I graciously put down a cc and he agreed to make sure I was paid back.  I didn't think there'd be an issue.

There was an issue.  A $24k issue.

Wow. How big was that suite??? 

[Hands4You]

It’s happened to me a couple of times in 10 years. One of the client’s had some mental problems. At the end of his session he claimed to work for the fbi and was a nut job lol. 
 

Luckily I rarely have an issue with clients paying

[Luv2play]

On 9/6/2025 at 10:14 AM, Peter Eater said:

Wow. How big was that suite??? 

More like how many nights was it occupied. 

[ReynST]

I've never been stiffed, but I think every provide has been ghosted at some point or another. 

This can be scheduling an appointment and not showing up or giving a false address for outcalls and then blocking the providers number or failing to respond.

This is one reason providers are increasingly requiring deposits