Escorts Say the Darndest Things

[+ glutes]

"I only do penetration on Overnights"

 

"I am going to the gym now so I can look hotter for you"

 

"I don't post a face picture because it affects my brand"

[jawjateck]

That's funny! I have a blog post in draft form, still a work in progress, that lists some of the ridiculous hyperbole guys use to make their ads stand out. To experienced clients, the faux hype actually turns us away, but some providers don't understand marketing.

[+ VeryHappyCustomer]

"I am going to the gym now so I can look hotter for you"

 

He may mean it. Once a guy asked me whether his pecs were the best I'd ever seen... When I smiled and said nothing, he jumped out of bed and did 50 push ups.

[Jbdesc]

He may mean it. Once a guy asked me whether his pecs were the best I'd ever seen... When I smiled and said nothing, he jumped out of bed and did 50 push ups.

 

To echo on that note - professional bodybuilders do quick workouts prior to getting on stage because it has great effects on the muscles visually.

[Tonyko]

"My license was suspended my girlfriend drives me to appointsments can she come in and watch One Tree Hill? (she won't disturb us)"

[Jbdesc]

"My license was suspended my girlfriend drives me to appointsments can she come in and watch One Tree Hill? (she won't disturb us)"

I'm dying..  Some people, I wonder if they even think about things like this before they speak..

[+ poolboy48220]

"My license was suspended my girlfriend drives me to appointsments can she come in and watch One Tree Hill? (she won't disturb us)"

I had a duo massage session with a couple guys who had a female roommate. At one point (maybe when we were switching from the massage room to their bedroom; this was a fun session), one of the guys yelled to the roommate "Are you going to shut your bedroom door?"

[DMICS]

"Cum is extra $$$"

[TruHart1]

"I got my ass waxed just for the rimming you plan to give me tomorrow!!!"

 

and from a different escort...

 

"Come here babe, let's make love!"

 

TruHart1

[+ V-Vhitner]

Somewhat different, but the first escort I ever hired showed up with a leg cast covered by a plastic bag.

[+ Keith30309]

"Do you have any condoms or lube?" then "how do you feel about bareback?" :eek:

[Jock123]

On Topic

 

Here's one of my Favorite "Clients say the Darndest things"

 

 

From Guy's you havent even met yet ... " Hey man, I plan on Hiring You often and am looking for a Regular. Anyway You can Reduce Your Rate since I'll be seeing You so much?"

[+ Truereview]

I think clients say the darnedest things too:

 

When it's late - "It's 2am, how soon can you get here?"

When it is literally too late - "Does it hurt when I bite it like this?"

How to kill a boner - "I could be your dad!"

[Kevin Slater]

I think clients say the darnedest things too:

 

When it's late - "It's 2am, how soon can you get here?"

When it is literally too late - "Does it hurt when I bite it like this?"

How to kill a boner - "I could be your dad!"

 

Well I can't possibly come to you, there's a blizzard going on!

 

Kevin Slater

[eyesopen]

Totally fair game Jock, True, Kevin!!

[Jbdesc]

On Topic

 

Here's one of my Favorite "Clients say the Darndest things"

 

 

From Guy's you havent even met yet ... " Hey man, I plan on Hiring You often and am looking for a Regular. Anyway You can Reduce Your Rate since I'll be seeing You so much?"

 

In college when I worked at a car dealership, this is what we would call a tire kicker. They talk a lot and are never to be seen again when it gets serious.

Edited November 23, 2016 by Jbdesc

[+ V-Vhitner]

Fair play, good sirs!!

[+ Truereview]

Well I can't possibly come to you, there's a blizzard going on!

 

Kevin Slater

Lol, you reminded me of one of my fave gifs...

 

http://cdn.gifbay.com/2013/11/cat_hopping_in_snow-100772.gif

[TopTierTop]

"I only do penetration on Overnights"

 

"I am going to the gym now so I can look hotter for you"

 

"I don't post a face picture because it affects my brand"

The first and last one are bizarre, but the 2nd one I say very often when I have to leave a conversation to go to the gym, because it is true. It's not the only reason I go to the gym, but I am certainly thinking about looking hotter for my clients when I work out.

[TopTierTop]

"Cum is extra $$$"

Ridiculous! Any escort who would say that is one to run away from fast. He has no idea of the importance of relationship building with clients. When he starts asking for extra money for things that are generally part of a sexual encounter, in my view, he is not respecting the client.

[TopTierTop]

On Topic

 

Here's one of my Favorite "Clients say the Darndest things"

 

 

From Guy's you havent even met yet ... " Hey man, I plan on Hiring You often and am looking for a Regular. Anyway You can Reduce Your Rate since I'll be seeing You so much?"

Hahaha! My motto is never reduce your fee. I would rather lose a potential client than start negotiating the value of my services on a case by case basis. If my fee feels expensive to them, I worry that, at any amount, they are spending money they can't afford to spend anyway. And the worst feeling I could ever leave a client with is regret! That is also the reason I often hesitate to do "right now" requests from new clients.

Edited November 24, 2016 by TopTierTop

[Irtwo]

Nothing can beat the famous:

 

"Money see, Monkey do......"

[+ jeezopete]

An escort mentioned he had dinner with his wife before he came to my hotel room, then said, “She’s waiting downstairs for me.”

[UpDownUnder]

Exchange with a Brazilian escort in Europe just last week:

 

"Why do you have two identical iPhones?"

"Because my wife would be pissed if she knew I was fucking girls."

"Um, you mean guys?"

"No, she's ok with me fucking guys, she just doesn't like when I fuck other girls, but I really like pussy."

"Oh..."

[Flynn]

"We don't need condoms, I take Truvada!" My favorite escort and I then started humping like bunnies, bareback.