What is it with unsolicited groping among gay men?

[+ PhileasFogg]

2 hours ago, soloyo215 said:

Assault? Sounds a little dramatic. Unwanted advances, boundary crossing, poor judgement, harassment, not respecting personal space maybe, but assault? To me assault involves a level of aggressiveness where you need to physically defend yourself, not fend off unwelcome touch.

REGARDLESS, I agree that it could be quite uncomfortable. However, if I could ask, had there been instances when you have welcomed such "approach"? I ask since this has been the topic of many conversations I've had with friends, family and in many other social settings for decades. The thing is that the vast majority of the time the person complaining does so only when they feel the touch and groping is unwanted, neglecting to recognize the other times when the same touching and groping has been welcome and wanted. Of course, I don't know you, which is why I inquire. Every time I have a conversation about this, that's my starting point.

Many times we focus on the touch we don't welcome, neglecting to recognize that the same approach is used with the touch we have welcomed from other people.

Just my thoughts, not law.

As I said, I’m not trying to blow my personal experience out of proportion BUT, yes, lack of consent constitutes assault in most places according to my research.

Maybe it’s a surprise to some - but times have changed.   If you haven’t heard, “Baby It’s Cold Outside” was blacklisted by #MeToo for glamorizing date rape.

And I will say that the two advances I’ve described were completely unsolicited and unwelcomed and, given their degree of intimacy, would have met the standard to constitute a crime.

so, pray tell, how is anything I’ve described different from this:

https://www.bbc.com/news/world-us-canada-45958023.amp

[jeezifonly]

In a public social situation where rules of conduct aren't enforced, use humor to deflect. Nothing too bitchy, but if privately blocking his progress with your hand hasn't been heard, engage your inner Dorothy Zbornak.

[+ nycman]

5 hours ago, PhileasFogg said:

I’m not trying to blow my personal experience out of proportion BUT…..

Edited 49 minutes ago by nycman

[+ Pensant]

I wouldn’t dream of touching somewhat like that; however, if a cute guy pinched my muscular ass, I’d invite him to continue!