Archangel Posted September 15, 2023 Share Posted September 15, 2023 Purportedly a client pays for time when he hires an escort. That amount of time is decided before the meet, in most cases, I'm sure. It might change during, but on the whole, the duration of the meet is normally figured out before client and escort meet. It seems that 1-hr meetups would occupy the whole time the escort is with the client. Push in. Pull out. Go. Or whatever thing is agreed upon during the hour. I don't know what all you-all's warped fantasies and activities are! But for longer times together, how is "time" approached. If a client hires an escort for a weekend, say, what is the reasonable expectation for a client to have for an escort to dedicate to focussing on the weekend? What is the opinion of clients and escorts here about doing "business" while with a client who's paying for a weekend? How about phone time? I had a regular who continued his day job while we went away on vacation to Hawaii for a few days. He would do work meetings while we were out. That was a relationship that soured over time, but I think in part because he wasn't committed to the escort time. I accommodated it for a while, but eventually I just didn't book him anymore. I didn't like paying for his time when he spent a lot of it doing work for his daytime job. But I also recognize that if it's a 72-hr meetup, we're both going to need some time to check phones, maybe laptops, whatever. It doesn't need to be a sustained 72-hrs of interaction. That's simply silly to think for anyone, client-escort or anyone else hanging out with anyone for that matter. I suspect that escorts who were with me for multiple-day BFE were doing work with other clients while we were together. Is it fair for the client to put in their add "unavailable" during a multiple-day BFE? I'm assuming that some clients who might message to discuss a booking them won't message during that period if the "unavailable" is up, but then of course there's those who just don't care. Some employers don't want you doing anything else on "company time" other than "company work." Why does or why doesn't that same idea apply to multiple-day meetups with clients and escorts, in your opinion? I ask that of hirers and hirees here. I mean this for a conversation...not criticism or lecturing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ DrownedBoy Posted September 15, 2023 Share Posted September 15, 2023 It depends on how you get along. If you don't like each other's company, you need to minimize contact. If a client expects you ny his side 72 hours in a row, you need to adjust his expectations Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archangel Posted September 15, 2023 Author Share Posted September 15, 2023 @DrownedBoy, I’m guessing “liking” each other was an assumption on my part. Even still, how devoted to the time paid for should an escort be expected to be? marylander1940 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
liubit Posted September 16, 2023 Share Posted September 16, 2023 When I hired for sessions longer than an overnight -let’s say a day, a weekend, a multiple-day trip-, I always allotted some “alone time”, both for me and the escort. The amount and length of that “alone time” varied depending on the total duration of the meeting, and it was mutually agreed. On average, I would say that for a weekend tryst, we would schedule 2-3 alone-hours daily. That would allow for phone or computer checking, gym, solitary shopping, etc. Believe me, the rest of the time we spent together was more than enough to cover bed fun, going to a show, or eating. In my experience, this “alone time” is ESSENTIAL for the success of the encounter. ICTJOCK, MikeBiDude, Simon Suraci and 7 others 8 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jeezifonly Posted September 16, 2023 Share Posted September 16, 2023 Just like employees who spend their workday seeking connections for the next job more than doing the job they have now… they become less welcome in the workplace. So phone activity limited. Not off (for emergencies) but if time is the one thing guaranteed by the provider, it does need to be attentive, not passive, with me watching him chat and scroll. The max I ever book is a couple hours. One brief personal break within that is fine. Archangel and ICTJOCK 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ICTJOCK Posted September 16, 2023 Share Posted September 16, 2023 Interesting conversation, but an important one to have. I think "on the clock time" should be agreed in advance. That includes point of focus. With so many people working from home (or anywhere else), it makes it easy for an escort with a "day job" (so to speak) to double up. I think that needs to be a point of negotiation or discussion and if is a consideration, the escort should discuss (and maybe the client ask about such distractions). There isn't a "right or wrong", just agreement by both parties as to expectations. What about payment for travel? Most escorts may require to be compensated based on mileage, but some may set it on billable time. Again, agreement in advance. Archangel and marylander1940 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Solution big-n-tall Posted September 16, 2023 Solution Share Posted September 16, 2023 In my experience, longer sessions and how much focus on the client depends a lot on the individual provider. The guy I hire the most is also the guy I have been on the longest extended sessions with (8 days). We have a lot of common interests so other than time he needs to work out, he’s with me constantly. I don’t care if he uses his cell. I think it’s unrealistic to ask him to not use it for that extended amount of time. He is rarely on it long, if he needs to call or check his phone. Another guy I have seen just focuses entirely on me for a weekend. I have never asked him to not use his cell, but I have never seen him even touch it the entire time we were together. He also never requested alone time. This is during weekends together. Yet another guy had a business outside of escorting and needed alone phone time occasionally to handle whatever came about with his other business. He asked me in advance and I said it was fine so long as it wasn’t a constant hindrance to our time together. Ultimately it comes down to communication between the client and provider. It needs to be discussed beforehand if alone time or phone time is needed when you are together for a overnight or longer. If you’re together for more than overnight I think it’s expected both client and provider may need some time to themselves to do whatever. However again with some providers, with me, it hasn’t always been the case. Archangel, Simon Suraci, + KensingtonHomo and 2 others 2 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ BenjaminNicholas Posted September 16, 2023 Share Posted September 16, 2023 Everyone needs their own time. Email, gym, calls to check on a dog, etc. You just need to communicate those needs and everything remains copasetic. I tend to be leery of clients who want to spend every waking moment together. Simon Suraci, thomas, MikeBiDude and 4 others 1 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archangel Posted September 16, 2023 Author Share Posted September 16, 2023 6 hours ago, big-n-tall said: Ultimately it comes down to communication between the client and provider. It needs to be discussed beforehand if alone time or phone time is needed when you are together for a overnight or longer. This really the answer for everything. The theory of everything if you will. Not 42! 😂 Simon Suraci 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archangel Posted September 16, 2023 Author Share Posted September 16, 2023 3 hours ago, BenjaminNicholas said: I tend to be leery of clients who want to spend every waking moment together. I don’t think anyone here was saying that was their expectation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted September 16, 2023 Share Posted September 16, 2023 (edited) 3 hours ago, BenjaminNicholas said: Everyone needs their own time. Email, gym, calls to check on a dog, etc. You just need to communicate those needs and everything remains copasetic. I tend to be leery of clients who want to spend every waking moment together. What he said ☝ 💯 Edited September 16, 2023 by Guest Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ BenjaminNicholas Posted September 16, 2023 Share Posted September 16, 2023 (edited) 1 hour ago, Archangel said: I don’t think anyone here was saying that was their expectation. Trust that there are clients who always 'want to get their money's worth' to the nth degree. Edited September 16, 2023 by BenjaminNicholas Medin, + KensingtonHomo and marylander1940 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ nycman Posted September 16, 2023 Share Posted September 16, 2023 1 hour ago, Archangel said: The theory of everything if you will. Not 42! Simon Suraci 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ JamesB Posted September 16, 2023 Share Posted September 16, 2023 This is something you need to discuss with your provider ahead of time. In my experience, alone time is essential for both during any meeting longer than an overnight. I usually schedule 2-3 hours a day of along time but again, this should be discussed and agreed upon in advance. While I don´t really care too much about a provider using his cel to reply to messages and quick checks, some really can put their phones down. I think that discussing and agreeing in advance each others expectations goes a long way for having a great experience. Archangel and Simon Suraci 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archangel Posted September 16, 2023 Author Share Posted September 16, 2023 3 hours ago, BenjaminNicholas said: Trust that there are clients who always 'want to get their money's worth' to the nth degree. I believe you. But coming from a provider it also sounds like someone who’s afraid they may be expected to a mite more than they’re comped for. The reverse if you will…trying to wring every last drop of blood from a turnip. Clients want as much as they can get for as little as they give. Escorts want top dollar for the least work. Those, together, seem to be the cynical assumption of many a client and an escort, respectively, here. And frankly, it gets old. Don’t people (clients) get tired of cynically bitching about something that alledgedly is fun? And if people (escorts) despise the working conditions so much, maybe other work would provide happier fulfillment. It seems like a lot of griping to me! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archangel Posted September 16, 2023 Author Share Posted September 16, 2023 2 hours ago, JamesB said: This is something you need to discuss with your provider ahead of time. In my experience, alone time is essential for both during any meeting longer than an overnight. I usually schedule 2-3 hours a day of along time but again, this should be discussed and agreed upon in advance. While I don´t really care too much about a provider using his cel to reply to messages and quick checks, some really can put their phones down. I think that discussing and agreeing in advance each others expectations goes a long way for having a great experience. I may have a candid conversation about phone usage the next time. Just because it’s been an issue in the past. I’ve had guys who seem to forget where their phones are when we’re together. And I’ve had guys who seem like their phones are surgically attached to their wrists. As for “me time” when we’re together, that’s just healthy for any relationship. Escort-client relationship or not. People need a break. I need my nap, damnit! 😂 I will decline the meetup with a guy who says he needs to do work while he’s with me. If you worked at Walmart part time, they wouldn’t allow you to take a call from your Wall Street broker no matter how important it is. I’ve been burnt by that. I would be really hesitant to hire a guy who needs to work while we’re together. I might understand a call or two…but not meetings and so forth that I have to conform my time off around. I’ve lived that with an escort, several times with the same guy, and it wasn’t a terribly fantastic experience. I like to think I could/would be accommodating, but I’d need some pretty good assurances it wouldn’t ruin the time together. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikeBiDude Posted September 16, 2023 Share Posted September 16, 2023 36 minutes ago, Archangel said: Clients want as much as they can get for as little as they give. Escorts want top dollar for the least work. That's a bit of a generalization that I doubt everyone here would agree with. + DrownedBoy, marylander1940, + sam.fitzpatrick and 1 other 2 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archangel Posted September 16, 2023 Author Share Posted September 16, 2023 2 minutes ago, MikeBiDude said: That's a bit of a generalization that I doubt everyone here would agree with. I agree. But there is many a squawker who does! And they tend to show up in my reading here a good bit. Time to exercise the hide function again! MikeBiDude 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ sam.fitzpatrick Posted September 17, 2023 Share Posted September 17, 2023 4 hours ago, Archangel said: I believe you. But coming from a provider it also sounds like someone who’s afraid they may be expected to a mite more than they’re comped for. The reverse if you will…trying to wring every last drop of blood from a turnip. I didn’t take the comment that way at all. It wasn’t a matter of comp but of respecting an escort’s limits and trying to stretch those. + BenjaminNicholas 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DWnyc Posted September 17, 2023 Share Posted September 17, 2023 I’ve never engaged more than a couple of hours - and have wondered how people can stand each other for more than that - in the hobby dynamic. In ”real life” people need breaks from each other even in the most upbeat / passionate scenarios. Otherwise the mood can sour quickly. Or maybe I’m just annoying to be with more than a couple of hours 😊 Archangel, + KensingtonHomo and big-n-tall 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DWnyc Posted September 17, 2023 Share Posted September 17, 2023 5 hours ago, Archangel said: I may have a candid conversation about phone usage the next time. Just because it’s been an issue in the past. I’ve had guys who seem to forget where their phones are when we’re together. And I’ve had guys who seem like their phones are surgically attached to their wrists. As for “me time” when we’re together, that’s just healthy for any relationship. Escort-client relationship or not. People need a break. I need my nap, damnit! 😂 I will decline the meetup with a guy who says he needs to do work while he’s with me. If you worked at Walmart part time, they wouldn’t allow you to take a call from your Wall Street broker no matter how important it is. I’ve been burnt by that. I would be really hesitant to hire a guy who needs to work while we’re together. I might understand a call or two…but not meetings and so forth that I have to conform my time off around. I’ve lived that with an escort, several times with the same guy, and it wasn’t a terribly fantastic experience. I like to think I could/would be accommodating, but I’d need some pretty good assurances it wouldn’t ruin the time together. On the subject of moonlighting while on the job … One memorable proactive marketing message I received from a provider I’d seen a few times and hadn’t reengaged- went something like: “I’m with a guy for a week - a whole week! That’s how much I’m in demand! But he falls asleep after we play for a good few hours … so if you want a phone or video session I’d be up for that …” MikeBiDude, NJF, + DrownedBoy and 1 other 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ purplekow Posted September 17, 2023 Share Posted September 17, 2023 I recently had a conversation with an escort about this. Basically, I told him I have gone on trips with friends and with my wife. I cared deeply for these people, but I always needed a break from them during a vacation. After dinner, I might take a walk and sometimes I would ask them to join and sometimes I would suggest that I needed some time to think and would like to walk alone. As we were secure in the relationship, there was no concerns of not spending too much or too little time, but if there were, a brief conversation about it would rectify it. I believe that on an extended encounter with an escort, respect for their privacy and their respect for your privacy and a willingness to talk about expectations is all you need to keep things on an even keel. I believe it is easier for the client to do this, than it is for the escort. So as a client, be cognizant of the personal needs of the escort and inquire if he needs more personal time if he seems off his game. + m_writer, liubit, MscleLovr and 2 others 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ DrownedBoy Posted September 17, 2023 Share Posted September 17, 2023 (edited) 13 hours ago, DWnyc said: “I’m with a guy for a week - a whole week! That’s how much I’m in demand! But he falls asleep after we play for a good few hours … so if you want a phone or video session I’d be up for that …” As another CoM mentioned, a provider who visited Chicago did the same thing after being hired for an overnight. When his current client was sleeping, he was texting other clients. If he hadn't arbitrarily, and without notice, cut my session short after getting the overnight, I could put up with it. Edited September 17, 2023 by DrownedBoy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Archangel Posted September 17, 2023 Author Share Posted September 17, 2023 Everyone needs me time…I think. That’s not the discussion here. The discussion is what is “on the clock” time. People who work outside of escorting have me time (I hope). But their lives also have other obligations that don’t allow for them to have me time. I don’t consider gym time work time for an escort. Not all clients want a muscled guy. A twink likely isn’t in the gym nearly as much as a muscle guy. If I hire a twink for a weekend I’d expect comparable time together with him as I would if I hired a muscle guy. If the muscle guy needs to use the gym, he can use his me time. Like everyone who goes to the gym. Unless you’re an athlete, you’re not paid to use the gym. Even if you have a physically demanding job. I use that example because if we’re paying for time, then time should be comparable between escorts. Not one for one of course, but comparable. We often ask about the market rate in NYC compared to Chicago, say. Well, if we’re paying for a muscle to spend time in the gym, not with us, that would be different rate between him and a twink who spends his time with us who’d otherwise be in the gym. So a twink’s per hour rate with us would be cheaper than a muscle guy if he spends more time with us than the muscle guy if the muscle guy is considering his gym time as something different from me time, as comped time but not with us. If we’re paying for time… I don’t know if I made myself clear. I know it’s clear in my head but it sounds confusing in explaining it! 😂 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
+ KensingtonHomo Posted September 17, 2023 Share Posted September 17, 2023 23 hours ago, Archangel said: Clients want as much as they can get for as little as they give. Escorts want top dollar for the least work. While I agree SOME people feel this way, it is a horrible mindset to approach being a client or a provider. Medin, MikeBiDude, Archangel and 1 other 2 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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