Escorts Say the Darndest Things

[30somethingsexybear]

LOL the last 3 WERE more or less St pickups! The crotch washer was actually a quite famous pornstar in town w his GF from West Coast. But I won't mention names even thou he's retired and out of the biz. (James Jameson:rolleyes:)

lol, be happy he did ask to wash his crotch. I remember him and he STUNK! I could imagine what his crotch would smell like without a good scrub ! YIKES!

[+ VictorPowers]

This is now my favorite thread!

[KyleS]

The escort told me he will go to the gym before we meet. So I asked him is it ok for him not taking the shower before I come, cause I want the sweat and the smell.

He replied:

No problem, but we can meet earlier. I can't keep sweet for a long time.

 

Can't believe I almost jizzed over a typo there.

[Guy Fawkes]

I don't care if you stink to high heaven... Just means I have to scrub every single inch of that body from head to toe.

 

This is now my favorite thread!

Edited February 11, 2018 by Guy Fawkes

[Gymowner]

Wasn't an escort but a really hot breeder I was giving head to while he was sitting in a chair. Head back and enjoying. All of a sudden he opens his eyes, looks at me and says "hey...is it cheating on your girl if you get head from a gay dude"? I looked at him with my mouth full and said mmmphumph and kept going. He shook his head, closed his eyes and blew out a massive load! Hahahaha

[marylander1940]

Wasn't an escort but a really hot breeder I was giving head to while he was sitting in a chair. Head back and enjoying. All of a sudden he opens his eyes, looks at me and says "hey...is it cheating on your girl if you get head from a gay dude"? I looked at him with my mouth full and said mmmphumph and kept going. He shook his head, closed his eyes and blew out a massive load! Hahahaha

 

I did that when I was in the Navy...

[Guy Fawkes]

As it should be!

 

"Have coffee first? Well my $400 fee starts right away, not when you put your dick in me."

[+ sniper]

Wasn't an escort but a really hot breeder I was giving head to while he was sitting in a chair. Head back and enjoying. All of a sudden he opens his eyes, looks at me and says "hey...is it cheating on your girl if you get head from a gay dude"? I looked at him with my mouth full and said mmmphumph and kept going. He shook his head, closed his eyes and blew out a massive load! Hahahaha

So like, how did things get THAT FAR before it even occurred to him? How did you meet him? Teach me your secrets lol.

[+ José Soplanucas]

I looked at him with my mouth full and said mmmphumph and kept going.

 

Your eloquence in such a critical moment is commendable.

http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lxels9BoVU1qff8too1_r1_400.gif

[Gymowner]

gotta do what ya gotta do guys!

heehee

[crushme99]

I looked at him with my mouth full and said mmmphumph

 

Ahahahahaha hahaha hahahaha

[marylander1940]

"The AIDS epidemic is costing me money... al those guys who died in the 80's now would be old and hiring escorts"

 

That was his comment when I told him I got lucky to be in a monogamous relationship in the 80's... It was a first hire I had tonight, I won't see him again.

[Ajac]

"The AIDS epidemic is costing me money... al those guys who died in the 80's now would be old and hiring escorts"

 

That was his comment when I told him I got lucky to be in a monogamous relationship in the 80's... It was a first hire I had tonight, I won't see him again.

All I can say is Wow.

[marylander1940]

All I can say is Wow.

 

it was a mean statement by him!

 

I won't see him again, I only hire nice guys

[30somethingsexybear]

"The AIDS epidemic is costing me money... al those guys who died in the 80's now would be old and hiring escorts"

 

That was his comment when I told him I got lucky to be in a monogamous relationship in the 80's... It was a first hire I had tonight, I won't see him again.

I think that line falls under what I would call "Just because you are correct, does not mean you should say it" category

[Cliff]

This from an escort who was cancelling on me just a few hours before our scheduled meeting:

“I can’t meet with you. I have to work.”

[Cliff]

Exactly!

 

Besides being nice is as free as being rude, but rudeness might cost money.

 

I must admit I wanted to bump this wonderful thread started by @Oaktown !

 

 

 

Maybe he escorts part time. He could have been nice and offer to reschedule...

He told me he was going to retire from escorting at the end of that month, so basically he didn’t give a shit about his escort reputation anymore; he didn’t care that he was cancelling at the last minute. What a dick.

Edited April 2, 2019 by Cliff

[Bearman]

"Cum is extra $$$"

 

YES! This one I've encountered very often in among "Taxi Boys" in Argentina and Brazil. They claim "if they cum they can't keep working" which is a lie. I've paid more to have them cum, and of course I see them go right back to work looking for the next client.

[Bearman]

Ridiculous! Any escort who would say that is one to run away from fast. He has no idea of the importance of relationship building with clients. When he starts asking for extra money for things that are generally part of a sexual encounter, in my view, he is not respecting the client.

 

True, but they always spring it on you when you ask them to cum right in the middle of the act! These are expert cons and know just when and how to play their games. I agree with you 100% though and I've never seen them again after no matter how much I've liked them. Sadly they don't seem notice it will cost them business on the long run. But they mostly seem to have $hort$ighted goal$.

[Bearman]

Twice I've been asked while naked in bed trying to get the rentboy hard: "Lets go out and hire a hooker, EH?!, so I can eat her out and fuck her while you fuck me? I'm straight and can't get hard with men!" said a gay club stripper and a hustler that regularly picked up older men at a gay bar in Vancouver.

Edited April 2, 2019 by Bearman

[carnalvore]

YES! This one I've encountered very often in among "Taxi Boys" in Argentina and Brazil. They claim "if they cum they can't keep working" which is a lie. I've paid more to have them cum, and of course I see them go right back to work looking for the next client.

 

Taxi boys?

[Bearman]

Taxi boys?

 

Yes it's common term used is some regions of the world to describe men that charge for time spent with them, i.e. hustlers. Taxi referring to a meter running. And probably also because many times one will be taken for an unexpected ride.

[RealAvalon]

Twice I've been asked while naked in bed trying to get the rentboy hard: "Lets go out and hire a hooker, EH?!, so I can eat her out and fuck her while you fuck me? I'm straight and can't get hard with men!" said a gay club stripper and a hustler that regularly picked up older men at a gay bar in Vancouver.

Twice? Why did you go back for seconds?

[Jbronson]

Provider: "You're not married, are you?"

Me: "Haha, no I'm not married."

Provider: "Ok good"

Me: "That's very sexy, you know, a guy with character morals and integrity. It's hot knowing you would've turned me down if you knew that I was married" (chuckles)

Provider: (Nervous laugh)

Me: (Chuckles) "So, shall we get started?"

 

"

Edited April 6, 2019 by Jbronson

[Bearman]

Twice? Why did you go back for seconds?

 

Two times, but one each with a two different guys! One was a stripper and the other a hustler both from the same gay bar on different occasions.