Do you take your wallet with you?

[nomad]

When meeting with guys, what do you take with you other than your phone and money?  If I go to them, I avoid taking my wallet. If I host at hotel, it's out away in a secure place and out of sight. 

I almost never have cash on me anyhow except when meeting guys.  The pain of having to cancel all the cards and getting 🆔 isn't something I want to endure.

Is it just me?

[Peter Eater]

No, it’s not just you. 

[maninsoma]

I never carried my wallet when I went to meet providers (escorts or masseurs) -- just my license, enough cash for the agreed upon fee, enough extra cash should I decide I wanted to extend my appointment or tip, and maybe one credit card in case I wanted to stop off somewhere on my way home.  

I stopped carrying my wallet several years ago.  The only time I bring a wallet is when traveling by plane, and when I get to my destination I leave the wallet in the safe.  There's not really a reason to have a wallet on one's person -- ID, insurance card, maybe one debit card and one credit card are typically all I need.

[AtlRob]

I take just my burner phone, an envelope with cash for the donation and my car key. 

Once, I rode the train when the provider was hosting near a station, so I took my rail pass, parked at a nearby station and rode to the appointment. But when I exited the train, I saw that I had no more trips on my pass (even though I had added more value earlier)!  When we finished the appt, and I paid the donation (in $100 bills), I had to ask the provider for train fare! He said I should just reload it in the train app on my phone, but it's a BURNER and has no apps! Anyway, he scrounged up $5 for me to use.

MORAL: always take some extra cash because you may need it! 

[DMonDude]

If it's the first time meeting a guy and i haven't vetted them here/they have no reviews here and i am taking a chance on them. I do leave my wallet in my car and i only take my phone/cash/car keys in with me if i'm meeting the guy at their place. Once i get a second phone, in this scenario i'd leave my main phone in the car too. If i'm hosting at a hotel, i hide my stuff.

Once i know the guy is cool/safe after a couple meets, or if it's a guy who is well reviewed/recommended here. I admittedly get much more lax though and don't really bother.

[Chien Andalou]

I have been hiring men for years. I always put away the valuables when I host, but I have never lost anything when I have met at the provider’s location. Not once, not even when I went to use the shower. There is always a risk, but my experience is that it is minimal. 

[Wings246]

4 hours ago, DMonDude said:

I do leave my wallet in my car and i only take my phone/cash/car keys in with me if i'm meeting the guy at their place. Once i get a second phone, in this scenario i'd leave my main phone in the car too. If i'm hosting at a hotel, i hide my stuff.

This has always been my struggle.  Which is riskier, leaving my stuff in my car that is parked on the street or keeping my stuff with me when I'm inside the provider's home/hotel room?  To me, both options are equally risky, for different reasons.

Edited Friday at 10:27 PM by Wings246

[jonasfoleson]

Can’t say I’ve ever had an issue. In uk my country there is an unspoken rule of discretion and mutual respect. Not to say theft neve happens but it’s not normal etiquette

[+ FrankR]

4 hours ago, jonasfoleson said:

Can’t say I’ve ever had an issue. In uk my country there is an unspoken rule of discretion and mutual respect. Not to say theft neve happens but it’s not normal etiquette

Really? You should read the The Daily Mail and The Sun sometime soon… 

[+ BOZO T CLOWN]

When visiting a provider, Bozo never brings his wallet. Only the agreed upon $$, cell phone, keys and Metro Card (when in NYC).
When hosting the provider, all valuables ($$, credit cards, important docs, spare noses, etc.) are hidden away.

BTC
🤡

[Nue2thegame]

52 minutes ago, BOZO T CLOWN said:

When visiting a provider, Bozo never brings his wallet. Only the agreed upon $$, cell phone, keys and Metro Card (when in NYC).
When hosting the provider, all valuables ($$, credit cards, important docs, spare noses, etc.) are hidden away.

BTC
🤡

Same but phone now stays in the car. Once when the provider and I were sharing photos on our identical phones, I left with the wrong phone. Made for a fascinating follow up discussion. 

[Rod Hagen]

Did you tell the man who leased you his youth and beauty and skills for a short bit that the reason you couldn't share photos (and the previous poster who had to borrow train fare) was that you had only a burner phone because you presumed he's a criminal? 

I'm being arch, and I suppose an argument can be made that it's not much different than practicing safe sex, better safe than sorry, yet to me it seems cynical to assume he would give a shit about your phone, especially when you know his number and where he lives.

Edited Saturday at 02:37 PM by Rod Hagen

[Rod Hagen]

5 hours ago, Rod Hagen said:

Did you tell the man who leased you his youth and beauty and skills for a short bit that the reason you couldn't share photos (and the previous poster who had to borrow train fare) was that you had only a burner phone because you presumed he's a criminal? 

I'm being arch, and I suppose an argument can be made that it's not much different than practicing safe sex, better safe than sorry, yet to me it seems cynical to assume he would give a shit about your phone, especially when you know his number and where he lives.

After breakfast, I realized I made a stupid post; we use fake names for fuck sakes, talk about a lack of trust from the outset. 

Think, "Hagen", think.  Then post.

Edited Saturday at 07:44 PM by Rod Hagen

[+ KensingtonHomo]

49 minutes ago, Rod Hagen said:

After breakfast, I realized I made a stupid post; we use fake names for fuck sakes, talk about a lack of trust from the outset. 

Think, "Hagen", think.  Then post.

No, I think you have a point. I live in NYC and carry a bag with me at all times. I don't have a burner phone (I do have an app) and I leave my wallet in my bag. 

I'm an SA survivor, so I read men very clearly and quickly. If I wasn't comfortable leaving my wallet in the same room as a guy, I'm not going to have sex with him. 

As I said on a similar thread, we each have to assess what we're comfortable with based on our lifestyle, job, relationship status, etc. I do tend to meet only guys who are well-reviewed both here and on other sites. I will say I do not carry cash. I actually prefer to pay electronically because it creates a shared need for security, since we now know each other's government names. If I show up to a place I've never been with $400, it's easier to rob me. 

[viewing ownly]

I suppose the concern is based on the volume of people you encounter before & after more so than the trust in the person you are seeing. 

Each circumstance is different. I barely bring more than what I donate, and would know since not much would be left if something was aloof, which in all my years of hiring has never happened. It's not worth it to him to go digging into my pants pocket while I'm naked on the table to find just ten bucks. 

[nomad]

ID theft is a big business for the criminal gangs.  Mailman being robbed is increasingly common.  The gangs are after checking account information to clear people's accounts out. 

Make me wonder if the Russian (or other crime syndicate) scammers running fake profiles are looking at new ways to steal people's identities and clear their accounts out.  Wasn't just last year that 3 people were convicted in drugging several men at gay bars, clearing out their bank accounts and leaving them to OD from the drugs they laced their drinks with.  

[Nue2thegame]

11 hours ago, Rod Hagen said:

Did you tell the man who leased you his youth and beauty and skills for a short bit that the reason you couldn't share photos (and the previous poster who had to borrow train fare) was that you had only a burner phone because you presumed he's a criminal? 

I'm being arch, and I suppose an argument can be made that it's not much different than practicing safe sex, better safe than sorry, yet to me it seems cynical to assume he would give a shit about your phone, especially when you know his number and where he lives.

Not sure who this was in response to. As for me, I take only what’s absolutely needed into the room mainly to limit collateral damage from my absentmindedness, rather than distrust of my companion. In my euphoric state, as previously noted, I have picked up the wrong phone once and walked out without paying once. Both occasions elicited an hilarious response from my companions. 

[jonasfoleson]

On 9/12/2026 at 12:53 PM, FrankR said:

Really? You should read the The Daily Mail and The Sun sometime soon… 

Well since I live there I can say first hand I’ve never had issues. Maybe as a  midwesterner since as a case don’t think well shouldn’t pathetically try to warp years of understanding of how sex work happens here 

[jonasfoleson]

On 9/12/2026 at 12:53 PM, FrankR said:

Really? You should read the The Daily Mail and The Sun sometime soon… 

The sun is a trashy The sun is a trashy  tabloid which I haven’t read in years. I know that from being here for years 

[ACluelessGent]

I haven't been using a wallet for years. Credit cards, ID, driving licence are on my phone. I carry one physical card just in case.  And it's a pity because I love my Valextra green wallet 😭

Edited yesterday at 02:05 PM by ACluelessGent

[Mark_fl]

17 hours ago, KensingtonHomo said:

No, I think you have a point. I live in NYC and carry a bag with me at all times. I don't have a burner phone (I do have an app) and I leave my wallet in my bag. 

I'm an SA survivor, so I read men very clearly and quickly. If I wasn't comfortable leaving my wallet in the same room as a guy, I'm not going to have sex with him.

There are just risks you have to take and ones you don't.  You can't hire for sex and not accept the risks of sex.  That doesn't mean you're going to give him your ATM pin code and leave your wallet on the end table when you take a shower. 

[+ KensingtonHomo]

15 minutes ago, Mark_fl said:

There are just risks you have to take and ones you don't.  You can't hire for sex and not accept the risks of sex.  That doesn't mean you're going to give him your ATM pin code and leave your wallet on the end table when you take a shower. 

That's true. But we all have different risk tolerances. And, as I said, some of us are significantly better at reading a room, assessing threats - from theft to physical harm - than others. If you're a cis white guy who passes as straight in the world and hasn't been sexually assaulted, in general you will overestimate certain threats (stranger danger!) and underestimate real threats (the guy I'm dating is capable of rape). As someone who has been visibly queer since I was a child, my ability to threat-assess a room, a situation, or a particular person is finely tuned. Ask your visibly gay friends and the women in your life about this. It's rarely spoken about but it's happening constantly. 

[KeepItReal]

59 minutes ago, jonasfoleson said:

The sun is a trashy The sun is a trashy  tabloid which I haven’t read in years. I know that from being here for years 

Hmm... My many trips to the UK has not left me with the impression of "rule of discretion and mutual respect" as you claim. Are you sure the rule book is widely available at Waterstones?? 🤔  Caution is warranted wherever you hire a companion.

[Peter Eater]

On 9/12/2026 at 5:56 AM, BOZO T CLOWN said:

When visiting a provider, Bozo never brings his wallet. Only the agreed upon $$

Really? Don’t you bring bail money? 

[jonasfoleson]

3 hours ago, KeepItReal said:

Hmm... My many trips to the UK has not left me with the impression of "rule of discretion and mutual respect" as you claim. Are you sure the rule book is widely available at Waterstones?? 🤔  Caution is warranted wherever you hire a companion.

Well, I don't deal with people with cognitive issues who use comically off gaslighting techniques. There are cultural differences in escorting between countries and regions. And I'm citing my experiences across cis, trans and gay escorts. I never said it was a utopia but there are differences in how shit unfolds here relative to the USA.