Asking a provider to make change.

[viewing ownly]

Wondering if anyone who saw either an escort or masseur ended up at the place of the meet-up, but forgot to break down the donation beforehand, and asked if change could be given?

I'm sure that it's a mixed bag with clients being too embarrassed, and ending up over-tipping rather than face the awkward conversation of wanting change made, if possible.

Do providers have change on-hand for situations such as this? Would you block a client from further visits if this is ever done to you? I feel that the reason that many set their amounts ending in the "80s" range are hopeful that the client rounds up, and doesn't ask for change. 

It's quite common I'll put my own % on a gratuity - because of this, I'm remembered for better or for worse.

[+ Pensant]

It’s the client’s responsibility to have the correct money in advance. It would be unlikely that the provider could make change and, as you said, it would be awkward as hell.

[Thelatin]

7 hours ago, viewing ownly said:

over-tipping

I don’t really think this is a thing lol.

[marylander1940]

7 hours ago, viewing ownly said:

Wondering if anyone who saw either an escort or masseur ended up at the place of the meet-up, but forgot to break down the donation beforehand, and asked if change could be given?

I'm sure that it's a mixed bag with clients being too embarrassed, and ending up over-tipping rather than face the awkward conversation of wanting change made, if possible.

Do providers have change on-hand for situations such as this? Would you block a client from further visits if this is ever done to you? I feel that the reason that many set their amounts ending in the "80s" range are hopeful that the client rounds up, and doesn't ask for change. 

It's quite common I'll put my own % on a gratuity - because of this, I'm remembered for better or for worse.

I'm sure it happens. Certainly the provider has a wallet with some cash but I doubt they carry a lot of money considering most people use credit card.

At home they might have a place where they store money before taking it to the ATM.

[Vin Marco]

In all my years and for god knows how many people I've met up with, I can say I've never been asked to make change. What are we talking about? "Give me 10 bucks back? " "Give me 20 bucks backs?"  I would have to guess that it's probably an extremely rare occurrence. 

Edited December 17, 2024 by Vin Marco

[Shawn Monroe]

I have been asked to make change. It’s rare but it’s happened. So I just make sure to have something to break down a $20 at this point. 

[Hot4latin]

If you've got a pocket full of 20s, rounding up is the safest way to go.  I'm not going to risk being misconstrued as cheap over the potential of a $15 "over-tip".  Now if all you have are 100s, that's a different story.  I'd consider asking the provider to break it but best not to put yourself in that situation in the first place.

Along these same lines, I was at the Tin Room in Dallas this past weekend.  I had just arrived and didn't really have all my cash organized so I was tipping the various dancers with singles and fives as I explored the place.  At some point, I realized I was down to larger bills.  Dropping $10 or $20 was a little high for the brief exchange the dancer and I had.  But I also didn't want to walk off without tipping.  So what did I do?  Since I liked the guy, I went ahead and obliged to a $40 private dance (two songs) and as luck would have it, he provided change for the C note I had in my wallet.  Crisis averted.

[+ Jamie21]

I occasionally get asked for change, an and I keep a few notes on hand just in case I need to give my client change. Usually they have the correct cash, or they’re paying by card. 

[+ ApexNomad]

Nothing kills the vibe faster than treating an escort like a cashier. If you really want to make the experience feel even more transactional, asking for change will do it. Just consider it a tip—they’ll appreciate it, and trust me, they’ll remember you if you decide to hire them again.

[Vin Marco]

17 minutes ago, ApexNomad said:

Nothing kills the vibe faster than treating an escort like a cashier. If you really want to make the experience feel even more transactional, asking for change will do it. Just consider it a tip—they’ll appreciate it, and trust me, they’ll remember you if you decide to hire them again.

Truth! ☝️ They'll certainly remember, they'll move the moon to accommodate in the future and likely give extra time when possible. We don't forget ( at least I don't ) 

[+ KensingtonHomo]

This is why I prefer paying electronically. That way if I want to give a bigger tip, I can. If the session was "meh", I can pay just the agreed upon rate. 

[Vin Marco]

This reminds of something that occurred in November... I was in California for 3 1/2 weeks and between multi night overnights, overnights and hourly commitments. I didn't have a single day to myself in those 3 1/2  weeks ( by design ) if you can believe this, I only had one cancellation in those 3 1/2 weeks and it was from someone I've known for many years, he became ill with Covid a day before we were set to meet...  he offered and insisted on paying me for the session anyway, it was a two hour commitment ... I graciously declined the generous offer and told him it's not necessary, I've been so busy, It's really not a big deal and that all I hoped for was that he recovered quickly....  even though I had declined,  he had sent me the money via Zelle...  after thanking him, I told him, "well then you have a credit and I'll see you the next time I visit Southern California... he said there will be no credit and told me, "merry Christmas Danny "  The moral of the story is that there's nothing I wouldn't do to accommodate him in the future, I would bend backwards to return such a generous gesture. He's a memorable and remarkable character, but I will never forget what he did, to your point @ApexNomad 

* I didn't ask a single person for a deposit nor did I charge anyone to ask me questions by the way 😉

Edited December 17, 2024 by Vin Marco

[maninsoma]

The solution is for the client to have the exact amount for the session in one pocket, and then what one wants to give as a tip in another.  That way it's easy to hand over just the contents of the first pocket if the session wasn't very good, and hand over both if it was.

I would never think of asking an escort or masseur to make change.  ATMs typically dispense twenties, so at most one would be "over tipping" $10 if one bothered to go to an ATM before the session.

[+ ApexNomad]

8 minutes ago, Vin Marco said:

This reminds of something that occurred in November... I was in California for 3 1/2 weeks and between multi night overnights, overnights and hourly commitments. I didn't have a single day to myself in those 3 1/2  weeks ( by design ) if you can believe this, I only had one cancellation in those 3 1/2 weeks and it was from someone I've known for many years, he became ill with Covid a day before we were set to meet...  he offered and insisted on paying me for the session anyway, it was a two hour commit... a graciously declined the generous offer and told him I've been so busy, It's really not a big deal and that all I hoped for was that he recovered quickly....  even though I had declined,  he had sent me the money via Zelle...  after thanking him, I told him, "well then you have a credit and I'll see you the next time I visit Southern California... he said there will be no credit and told me, "merry Christmas Danny "  The moral of the story is that there's nothing I wouldn't do to accommodate him in the future, I would bend backwards to return such a generous gesture. He's a memorable and remarkable character, but I will never forget what he did, to your point @ApexNomad 

* I didn't ask a single person for a deposit nor did I charge anyone to ask me questions by the way 😉

That’s a beautiful story. It speaks to the care, respect, and commitment both of you have towards each other. That’s really special.

[ICTJOCK]

I have been asked to provide change once and I did so.   It wasn't a big deal.  Generally the client has it counted and ready.

[Rod Hagen]

All the years that my Massage was $85, most people just paid $100, which is what I was counting on when I set that price "undercutting" everyone else charging $100.  There were a few who did ask for change.  The escort rate of $220 was occasionally the OPPOSITE situation, "$220 was it?  Oh, I only have $200, I'll get you next time."

[Act25]

I typically don't pay with bills smaller than 20's so I just round-up by $10 if need to.  I did have a recent experience that was so bad I was determined not to pay extra so I gave him part of his fee in 1's and quarters.  

[+ DrownedBoy]

Asking for change from a provider shows no class.

Like they said, carry smaller bills, ask to use an app, or give it as a tip.

[BrickBuilder]

I have never expected a provider to make change.  I don't ask but I suspect many of them bring little to no cash with them for a variety of reasons.

The question becomes do we as the client carry and pay in small bills (10 and 20's) to avoid the change situation (but then you have to sit there and watch the provider count out several hundred dollars)? or do you carry and pay in larger bills (50's and 100's) so that the provider can count quickly.   It's a dilemma because I think endless counting cheapens the entire experience.  Also my preference used to be to leave the payment for the provider in an envelope so they could just pick it up and slide it into their backpack or pocket.   Unfortunately over time, distrust among clients and providers have done away with the "I trust the payment is all there in the envelop."  I can typically only do that with repeat providers and they know that the money is there.

So, in the end, I typically have a blend of larger and smaller bills so I can pretty much make any dollar amount and try to use the fewest number of bills as possible. Envelops come and go depending on the provider.

[viewing ownly]

32 minutes ago, AtlTopGuy said:

I have never expected a provider to make change.  I don't ask but I suspect many of them bring little to no cash with them for a variety of reasons.

The question becomes do we as the client carry and pay in small bills (10 and 20's) to avoid the change situation (but then you have to sit there and watch the provider count out several hundred dollars)? or do you carry and pay in larger bills (50's and 100's) so that the provider can count quickly.   It's a dilemma because I think endless counting cheapens the entire experience.  Also my preference used to be to leave the payment for the provider in an envelope so they could just pick it up and slide it into their backpack or pocket.   Unfortunately over time, distrust among clients and providers have done away with the "I trust the payment is all there in the envelop."  I can typically only do that with repeat providers and they know that the money is there.

So, in the end, I typically have a blend of larger and smaller bills so I can pretty much make any dollar amount and try to use the fewest number of bills as possible. Envelops come and go depending on the provider.

I have never witnessed a person I've donated time to count money in front of me, ever. I also never put it in an envelope - that just wastes their time. And, if any providers want to chime in on my hunch - the ones that may short-change are envelope guys more so than the "dough in sight, on a table in a stack" ones.

[Vin Marco]

10 minutes ago, viewing ownly said:

I have never witnessed a person I've donated time to count money in front of me, ever.

Unless it's insisted upon, I find it in very poor taste to count money in front of somebody. 

[Cretus]

This scenario, where it is cumbersome to come up with very specific and atypical donation amounts, is exactly why I advise providers to stick to some round, even numbered rate (for many, it’s $300 an hour). 
 

A super-specific number like $440 is not just more money for the client to pay in a raw sense, but it may be a less convenient sum of money for them to immediately come up with on hand (they may only have hundred dollar bills).

A client may be likelier to say yes to your rate of $400 instead of $440, not just because it is cheaper, but because they happen to only have hundred dollar bills on hand. 

 

Edited December 18, 2024 by Cretus

[Vin Marco]

12 minutes ago, viewing ownly said:

I also never put it in an envelope - that just wastes their time. And, if any providers want to chime in on my hunch

It's not a waste of time. I see people that use special stationary. They write my name on it, in a way I like it.... it tells me they took the time.... those that leave the honorarium in plain sight is also fine. 

[marylander1940]

On 12/17/2024 at 10:34 AM, maninsoma said:

The solution is for the client to have the exact amount for the session in one pocket, and then what one wants to give as a tip in another.  That way it's easy to hand over just the contents of the first pocket if the session wasn't very good, and hand over both if it was.

I would never think of asking an escort or masseur to make change.  ATMs typically dispense twenties, so at most one would be "over tipping" $10 if one bothered to go to an ATM before the session.

Unfortunately sometimes common sense it's not common. 

 

[+ ApexNomad]

14 minutes ago, viewing ownly said:

I have never witnessed a person I've donated time to count money in front of me, ever. I also never put it in an envelope - that just wastes their time. And, if any providers want to chime in on my hunch - the ones that may short-change are envelope guys more so than the "dough in sight, on a table in a stack" ones.

For first-time providers, I always put the cash in an envelope on a table or stand, and it’s always visible when they come in. They know it’s there, I know it’s there. I don’t hand it to them directly—call it a bit of caution on my part or stupidity. 

For regulars, I hand it over directly, still in an envelope, since there’s already trust established. Call me old-fashioned, but I don’t like handing over paper money right after our encounter.

“Don’t treat them like a commodity, and don’t treat me like an ATM.”  It’s a reminder to me to always maintain respect and dignity in this transaction, emphasizing that both parties should be valued beyond just the exchange of money.