Overweight clients

[shawshini]

First time posting here so apologies if this is a repeated topic. I did some searching but didn’t find a lot.

Some background, used to be super obese (over 400 lbs) and now into the obese territory, (250 lbs). Still losing but I’ll probably never be thin or buff...

I’m looking at some escorts and obviously I’d disclose all of this before, just wondering if I should be prepared for rejection. 

Honest feedback please, I can take it!

thanks!

[Kevin Slater]

Any provider worth his salt should be happy to see you, but it never hurts to briefly describe yourself beforehand, especially if it will make you feel more comfortable during the session.

Kevin Slater

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

[Jamie21]

Yes check with the provider. When I do massage there’s a size limit for the table, but that means the bed can be used instead. Yay! 
If you check you’ll find out beforehand whether the provider cares or not about your body size. It’s better than turning up and finding out they’re sizeist. 

[EastCoastGuy]

I am in the same position. Over the last 20 years I went from 180 to 480 to 220. I have only once had a provider turn me down. However, when I was above about 250, I always informed providers ahead of time. Many suggested a floor mat or futon, which I find very comfortable and secure. 

[Islesguy]

As an overweight client, it's always a worry for me. Thankfully, I have yet to message someone who had an issue when I told him in my initial contact. I do stick to well known (on here) escorts so that could be why I have been fortunate.

[WolfCompanion]

If you feel somehow uncomfortable with your weight, I suggest to be upfront with the provider and see how he reacts about it. If he is not okay with your weight, he is not worth your time. As a provider, I would never reject a client because of his weight. The things I expect from a client are respect, politeness, good hygiene, and being std clean.

[MiamiLooker]

On 6/7/2021 at 10:57 PM, Benjamin_Nicholas said:

 

Don't let the overweight client know you think they're lacking self-respect...

On 6/7/2021 at 11:31 AM, Benjamin_Nicholas said:

Self-care is a real thing.  It's not just vanity...  It's self respect.  

Whether you're in a looks-based biz or not, giving a shit about how you look is not a bad thing.  Eat right.  Stay in shape.  Skincare.  This isn't rocket science, however, it's something that most of America doesn't practice. 

We treat symptoms...  We don't do preventative care.

 

 

[italianboyph]

On 6/7/2021 at 4:12 PM, jtmick said:

First time posting here so apologies if this is a repeated topic. I did some searching but didn’t find a lot.

Some background, used to be super obese (over 400 lbs) and now into the obese territory, (250 lbs). Still losing but I’ll probably never be thin or buff...

I’m looking at some escorts and obviously I’d disclose all of this before, just wondering if I should be prepared for rejection. 

Honest feedback please, I can take it!

thanks!

Anybody who’d reject you based off physical looks shouldn’t be in the biz. Any provider would be lucky to have you and the ones who reject you again shouldn’t be providing. I’ve never rejected anybody for anything, it’s also not my place to do that. The truth is that I’m here to provide, not judge. I understand the rejection for size because I’ve been there. Just keep your head up cause we’re not all AHoles🥰

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

11 hours ago, MiamiLooker said:

 

Don't let the overweight client know you think they're lacking self-respect...

 

 

 

Weak pivot Fox News...  Try harder the next time

[dbar123]

If you are in a position where you are worried about your weight then it should be a wake-up call to better spend your hard earned money in the gym and take it off. I speak from personal experience in this having shed close to 100 pounds over the past 10 years in multiple attempts. Sorry if I offend anyone but that’s my personal view on this. Health trumps pleasure.

[marylander1940]

On 6/7/2021 at 7:12 PM, jtmick said:

First time posting here so apologies if this is a repeated topic. I did some searching but didn’t find a lot.

Some background, used to be super obese (over 400 lbs) and now into the obese territory, (250 lbs). Still losing but I’ll probably never be thin or buff...

I’m looking at some escorts and obviously I’d disclose all of this before, just wondering if I should be prepared for rejection. 

Honest feedback please, I can take it!

thanks!

 

Just tell the guys in advance about you physique. I'm sure most would have no problem seeing you. 

[shawshini]

After being overweight for most of my adult life I don’t offend easily and have a thick skin. (Pun intended).  I’m not sure if you even read my post, but that’s just what I am doing, having gone from 477 to 250 lbs in three years.  My health is better than it has ever been the past ten years and my doctor tells me I’ve added years to my life.

The point of the post was to get feedback on what I should expect from providers at this size. 

I can assure you that any overweight person does not need to be told to get to a gym, we live in these bodies and whether or not we show it, we know deep down the effect excess weight has on our health.  Unsolicited advice like this is neither helpful or supportive.  

[CuriousByNature]

1 hour ago, dbar123 said:

If you are in a position where you are worried about your weight then it should be a wake-up call to better spend your hard earned money in the gym and take it off. I speak from personal experience in this having shed close to 100 pounds over the past 10 years in multiple attempts. Sorry if I offend anyone but that’s my personal view on this. Health trumps pleasure.

With all due respect, the OP wasn't looking for advice on how to spend his money.  It's awesome you have been able to shed the excess weight, and that's a big achievement you should rightly be proud of, but the OP's immediate concern is about how he might be received at his current weight.

[+ sam.fitzpatrick]

As an overweight client, I always disclose my weight to a potential masseur or escort.  I've found providers care less about my physique and more about cleanliness.  I've never had any provider explicitly decline me for my weight. 

I assume that a provider that replies with a message, "I am not available" at the time requested without suggesting an alternative appointment option are politely saying "Something in the information you have provided does not meet my standards.  Look elsewhere."  

 

[Colton]

5 hours ago, jtmick said:

having gone from 477 to 250 lbs in three years

 

5 hours ago, jtmick said:

My health is better than it has ever been the past ten years and my doctor tells me I’ve added years to my life.

Congratulations!  That is an accomplishment worth celebrating.

[Jamie21]

I look to my clients for 3 things. Be clean and fresh (that’s the top requirement and an absolute red line), be punctual (I have a schedule, if you’re unavoidably delayed please communicate, we can always reschedule), be respectful and polite (I’m a human being not a piece of meat). That’s all. If they’re those things then I’m able to give my best for them. They’ll get my total attention and focus because there’s no issues with cleanliness, rushing or dealing with attitude to distract me. 
Their body size, shape or colour isn’t any issue atall. A good provider knows that sexiness goes way beyond physical appearance. There’s something sexy and attractive about everyone and a great provider will know how to find it in their client and bring it out. The fact that you’ve come for a session in the first place makes you attractive in my opinion. It means you chose me to share it with…and that’s definitely a positive for me! It starts things off well and I’m eager to show you that you made the right choice. 
Long post, sorry but I think this is important because lots of my clients say they worried about being sexy enough to have a massage and fun. It’s a shame because everyone can be sexy and they shouldn’t worry about their body shape. Just be clean punctual and nice. 

[shawshini]

Just want to thank everyone for chiming in on this thread! I really appreciate the perspectives and it makes me feel a lot more comfortable booking a session.

[sydneyboy]

Could I put the question this way. How many clients of escorts are in their 20’s and built like super fit athletes? If that was a requirement of an escort I think they would starve.

[Bargara Leatherboy]

As someone who has been large most of his life, I had a period where I walked a lot and swam a lot and was very trim, but that did not last.

 

I feel good about myself , self love is important, but I also am smart enough to know its not attractive to some, and of course there are the health issues.

 

The heaviest I got to was 320 pounds and currently i am slowly loosing and at 275 today.

 

When i see a new provider I always send a description, in a email or text message,  “I am a 60 year blonde bear 275 pounds looking for …..”  and take it from there.

 

If someone says does not work for me  - I thank them for the honesty and move on.

 

I have a couple of great providers who make me feel great, and we have a fun time exploring pleasure.

 

I could go to a bathhouse, pay my $25 and wander around all night, maybe get lucky, maybe get rejected, maybe end up in a cubicle giving myself a hand job.

 

Or I could spend $300-$600 with a provider and have a wonder couple of hours .

 

A lesson there for providers who are looking to improve their business.

 

I reflect back on an evening i spent in a gay B&B which was closing optional.  I spent a couple of nights there, the middle night I was the only guest, the owners were out of town and they had a guy in who was looking after the place and me.

We had chatted briefly when he arrived, i did not take much notice, i was swimming and sunbathing naked, had a walk on the property and a swim in the river that passed thru their property, i had a long relaxing outdoor shower, and thought nothing of it.

I went into town in the late afternoon, had a walk on the beach and some dinner.

When I returned the host offered me a glass of wine, and wanted to see a pic of my husband, so i grabbed my iPad and found one, he came and sat very close to me while looking at the pics.  He then suggested a moonlight swim.

I dived in first, he joined me and of course he was very handsy.

We had a fun night, drank some wine, soaked in the hot tub, played, I particularly remember bending over the balcony as he ate my ass out.

he told me that what attracted him to me, was the way I just showered that afternoon without any self consciousness.

 

The really professional providers will see past your excess weight and will discover your inner sexiness and enjoy you as a sexual being and an interesting person

 

 

 

 

 

[Jamie21]

2 hours ago, westernsyd said:

As someone who has been large most of his life, I had a period where I walked a lot and swam a lot and was very trim, but that did not last.

 

I feel good about myself , self love is important, but I also am smart enough to know its not attractive to some, and of course there are the health issues.

 

The heaviest I got to was 320 pounds and currently i am slowly loosing and at 275 today.

 

When i see a new provider I always send a description, in a email or text message,  “I am a 60 year blonde bear 275 pounds looking for …..”  and take it from there.

 

If someone says does not work for me  - I thank them for the honesty and move on.

 

I have a couple of great providers who make me feel great, and we have a fun time exploring pleasure.

 

I could go to a bathhouse, pay my $25 and wander around all night, maybe get lucky, maybe get rejected, maybe end up in a cubicle giving myself a hand job.

 

Or I could spend $300-$600 with a provider and have a wonder couple of hours .

 

A lesson there for providers who are looking to improve their business.

 

I reflect back on an evening i spent in a gay B&B which was closing optional.  I spent a couple of nights there, the middle night I was the only guest, the owners were out of town and they had a guy in who was looking after the place and me.

We had chatted briefly when he arrived, i did not take much notice, i was swimming and sunbathing naked, had a walk on the property and a swim in the river that passed thru their property, i had a long relaxing outdoor shower, and thought nothing of it.

I went into town in the late afternoon, had a walk on the beach and some dinner.

When I returned the host offered me a glass of wine, and wanted to see a pic of my husband, so i grabbed my iPad and found one, he came and sat very close to me while looking at the pics.  He then suggested a moonlight swim.

I dived in first, he joined me and of course he was very handsy.

We had a fun night, drank some wine, soaked in the hot tub, played, I particularly remember bending over the balcony as he ate my ass out.

he told me that what attracted him to me, was the way I just showered that afternoon without any self consciousness.

 

The really professional providers will see past your excess weight and will discover your inner sexiness and enjoy you as a sexual being and an interesting person

 

 

 

 

 

Exactly this. “Discover your inner sexiness” Although I’d say it’s not inner because it is on display in how you behave and interact. A good provider will notice these things like that guy noticed you taking a shower. Someone who only looks superficially won’t notice. 

It’s the reason if clients ask to send me their picture I decline. It’s not necessary to see a picture. A picture isn’t the person, it’s just what they look like not who they are. 

[EastCoastGuy]

Hating on your weight, or your appearance in general, whether from yourself or from others, does not help you to change. I did not lose weight or start getting in shape until I learned to love my body the way it was. People don’t usually make positive change from negative motivation.  

[shawshini]

Update: had my first meeting and it was fantastic. Incredibly grateful to this forum and all the posters!

[HoleTrainer]

Don’t forget that plenty of guys out there are into bigger guys too, including some escorts.

One of my best friends is also an escort.  We go drinking together on our off time.  He loves bears and will usually be checking out one of the guys with the biggest belly in the room and telling me how hot he is.  (Sometimes I agree, sometimes not, as I’m more face-oriented.) He’d probably be more likely to hook up with a bigger guy for free than anyone else.  Just because that’s his preference.

So my point is, guys who are bigger, don’t assume that all escorts are just being nice and putting up with you non-judgementally.  Plenty of us actually think you’re hot and that your body is a great body.  Being in this line of work tends to really open up our minds and teach us that all kinds of people can be very sexy.  Not everyone but a lot of us.

[+ Lucky]

8 hours ago, HoleTrainer said:

Don’t forget that plenty of guys out there are into bigger guys too, including some escorts.

One of my best friends is also an escort.  We go drinking together on our off time.  He loves bears and will usually be checking out one of the guys with the biggest belly in the room and telling me how hot he is.  (Sometimes I agree, sometimes not, as I’m more face-oriented.) He’d probably be more likely to hook up with a bigger guy for free than anyone else.  Just because that’s his preference.

So my point is, guys who are bigger, don’t assume that all escorts are just being nice and putting up with you non-judgementally.  Plenty of us actually think you’re hot and that your body is a great body.  Being in this line of work tends to really open up our minds and teach us that all kinds of people can be very sexy.  Not everyone but a lot of us.

What about guys with overtrained holes? 🙂