If the bottom does not have an erection and does not ejaculate is he really enjoying it?

[+ KensingtonHomo]

3 minutes ago, MscleLovr said:

Do you feel that might be because the pounding is painful? Or is it for some other reason such as wanting to pee?

No, it's not usually painful. I think it's just that the prostate has being stimulated and the nerves are all activated so there's probably more blood flowing to that area, which is highly pleasurable for me. Occasionally it will make me feel like i have pee, but not usually. 

[Ran]

2 hours ago, Vegas_nw1982 said:

It takes a big man to admit when he's lost an election.

(Not trying to be political...just funny🤣)

Back to the topic:  When I bottom, I am usually hard and ejaculate about half the time.  Even when I don't, I'm still having a great time

🤣🤣🤣 my bad! Freudian slurp!

[Indestructible]

10 hours ago, MscleLovr said:

Another time, in a small group, he’d been fucked by all of us but he only came to a shuddering climax after I bound his hands and fee

Sign me up!!

[arnie]

As one of the guilty as to not cumming at times or even being able to maintain an erection.  You can still have a great time.  Sex is as much or maybe more about the connection than the body parts.  It has been said that the biggers se organ is the brain.  Sometimes I have an emotional climax with my buddy, we reach an intense level of emotional intensity and then take a break.  But cumming is not always in the cards and at my age that is OK.    

[Ran]

4 hours ago, arnie said:

As one of the guilty as to not cumming at times or even being able to maintain an erection.  You can still have a great time.  Sex is as much or maybe more about the connection than the body parts.  It has been said that the biggers se organ is the brain.  Sometimes I have an emotional climax with my buddy, we reach an intense level of emotional intensity and then take a break.  But cumming is not always in the cards and at my age that is OK.    

I want to have sex with you, buddy!

[HoseMaster]

On 7/5/2022 at 9:38 AM, MscleLovr said:

Do you feel that might be because the pounding is painful? Or is it for some other reason such as wanting to pee?

Over the years, I’ve found myself topping more.  I only bottom now to please my partner.  I don’t feel any real pleasure sensations from bottoming, and now that I think back, I don’t think I ever did.  I wish I did though, as that’s probably why I’ve reverted more to topping.  It takes me a good 5-10 minutes to get used to someone inside me as well.

For me, when I’m bottoming, I do feel more pain than pleasure.  I do get the urge to pee sometimes (from the prostate).  I think I only seem to enjoy the site of a smooth muscle boy pounding me, as I can only really get off with the visual of him.  This always means I’m on my back with him facing me.

I wish I could be one of those guys that just come from someone inside them, but I haven’t felt anything close to cumming by bottoming.  I always have to jack-off while they’re inside me.

Edited July 6, 2022 by HoseMaster

[hungry4darkmeat]

I’ve had several experiences where the top sent shivers through my body by hitting a nerve or my sweet spot lol but the best thing ever is when you have the woman’s orgasm where you get shocks of pleasure and waves of warm and euphoric body wide shivers shakes and quivers- in my experience the cum drips out of my soft peepee after several minutes of that amazing feeling 

[+ Charlie]

This thread made me try to think about how I reacted when I got fucked, but it's been so many years that I can hardly remember. However, I'm sure there was no regular pattern--it probably all depended on the entirety of the situation: who I was doing it with, why I was doing it, how he was doing it, etc. Sexual pleasure is more than just a mechanical process, even when one is only masturbating.

[jmichaeliii]

On 7/1/2022 at 5:55 PM, 7829V said:

I've met some bottoms that don't have an erection when I'm fucking them, and some don't even cum. I always ask if they want to cum, so I can help them. I don't want to be a selfish top, but several of them say they are fine. A guy I met yesterday didn't remove his jockstrap... and didn't have an erection, but I noticed precum.  For me the best, is when I'm inside them and they cum... to me is a sign and they are enjoying it and I'm doing a good job....

But I also have a young friend on the other side of the spectrum, after less than a minute he will always cum... haha.

Me personally for whatever reason I don't either.  It takes me about 30 minutes to be ready afterward.  Almost like I need a little recovery, but the orgasm is really intense at that point.

[pubic_assistance]

I haven't been fucked in years...but when I was younger I do recall encounters where the top took a long time to cum and I would lose my own erection during the sex play. There were times that I would (if the sex had been particularly hot) ejaculate while barely being erect.

Pleasure during sex has never required a constant erection for me.

I've been at sex parties where I had sex with dozens of people and got fucked multiple times. After cumming five or six times, your ability to hold an erection becomes reduced but I don't ever recall my excitement about the interplay of naked men and women ever being reduced by the lack of an erection.

[marylander1940]

Yes!

Some guys cum while getting fucked, others don't or just can't. 

Each person is different, each situation is different. 

[marylander1940]

On 7/2/2022 at 8:31 PM, nycman said:

I actually find it kind of hot when a bottom is clearly enjoying himself but is flaccid.
To me it means I’m doing such an amazing job that he’s totally focused on his hole.
Everything else, even his dick, is secondary.

Feel free to create your own fantasy. Mine works for me. 

[+ purplekow]

If the bottom is not hard and is into humiliation, I find that a good opportunity to make fun of him not having an erection. You have to know your partner and know his turn ons.  I have had one partner in particular who only got hard when bottoming when he was humiliated verbally alomg  with physical humiliation such as teasing slaps across the face.   He would answer back when he was hard, with things like "see I am a man" or "your cock made a man of me". "or no one else gets me hard like that" The exact words did not really matter so much as his realizing that his pleasurable erection was directly due to my control over him.  Now that I think about it, not sure who was controlling whom but it was fun and very hot.

Edited February 4 by purplekow

[hungry4darkmeat]

I used to jo to cum whenever I got fucked but now I prefer to just stay soft and enjoy the fuck especially his cumming. I can jack off any time so the actual ejaculation is not my goal- If he gets it right, I will get much more than an orgasm out of it and if I’m fortunate enough to get the woman’s orgasm too thats a bonus. When I find tops who can make that happen I keep them around!

Edited February 4 by hungry4darkmeat

[dcguy20]

This thread has been very informative. I have run the gamut when I've bottomed, but have one rule that remains the same. If there isn't any kissing, I won't be getting fucked. The kissing relaxes me. 

[Guest]

My experience bottoming is similar to others; sometimes hard and cum and sometimes not. All times very pleasurable. 

[SouthOfTheBorder]

it’s common for the bottom to lose an erection bc of overstimulation.  while ejaculation is pleasurable & desirable, I think it’s a mistake to base the entire experience on me cumming or the provider cumming.  it’s the overall experience- the journey, not the destination.

I don’t care if a provider cums or not.  If they want to cum, I’ll give it my best shot. But, they don’t need to make me cum.  

and then there are the elusive butt orgasms that are a total body ejaculation in a different way.  If you experience these, then you know 

yes - the bottom can experience intense pleasure without an erection & without cumming. 

Edited February 4 by SouthOfTheBorder

[craigville beach]

i focus on the top having a great time, if he is having a good time, than I will.  I enjoy have him climax while deep inside me. I can feel his whole body react to his achieving climax.  

[+ Charlie]

I became sexually active fairly young (17), so most of the gay men with whom I had sex in the early years were older than I was, and most wanted to, or expected to, fuck me. They seemed to stereotype me as a "twink," since I was average height (5'10") and very slender, and I was attracted to taller men who were well built and hairy, so they often were taken aback when I resisted the classic script. As a result, when they did fuck me, I was usually less than enthusiastic about it, and rarely maintained an erection while being fucked.

The first time that I discovered that getting fucked could actually be pleasurable occurred in my early 20s. I was a regular at a local gay bar in Philadelphia, and one of the bartenders was a favorite with many customers. I found him physically and personally very attractive, and I was told by other regulars that he had a big cock and loved to fuck, and he was good at it. One night he suggested at closing that he would like to accompany me to my apartment, and I said yes. Because I liked him and already knew what to expect, I was relaxed and prepared to make the best of the experience. When we tumbled into bed we were still partly dressed, and he quickly took me from behind. He whispered sweet nothings in my ear as he slowly fucked me while jerking me off, and to my own surprise I came explosively at the same time he did! It wasn't until he withdrew that I saw his cock, and was shocked at the size of it--how could I possibly have taken that?! The answer, of course, was that I was strongly attracted to him, was psychologically prepared, and he was an expert at what he did to make me enjoy the whole physical and emotional experience. Unfortunately, it was a once-in-a-lifetime experience, but he did make me realize that it was possible.

[Zapped]

When I first explored bottoming, while in college, it seemed more painful than pleasurable physically, but so emotionally powerful. I've always been more of a side, but when I have bottomed, I'm almost always soft. One time I came from my boyfriend fucking me (an experience that solidified my sense that I am gay), although it's since been explained to me that was probably from prostate stimulation. I got raped when I was in my early 20s and didn't bottom for over 20 years. When I started again, it was so emotionally/spiritually powerful, even if I didn't cum while being topped.

Point is, someone can not get hard and still LOVE being topped.

[Simon Suraci]

I echo many of the sentiments already posted. Everyone is different. Level of enjoyment has no relationship with level of, or duration of hardness.

When I bottom, I tend to go soft, whether I am enjoying it or not. The top has to hit the right places and the right angles with the right pace to get me going, but once he does, it’s a blast. It’s rare, but the full body orgasm is amazing.

It’s not important for me to cum, whether topping or bottoming. I do when my client wants me to cum. I often do. It just depends on the client and what I am feeling in the moment, and o of course if I need to save up my mojo for another client and I know that cum is optional or unimportant to my current client.

While being fucked, I can cum when:

- hard

- hands free

- flaccid

- stroking

- any combination of the above 

Even when I am just being rimmed, I lose my erection. It has nothing to do with my level of enjoyment. As soon as someone goes south, so does my dick. I can get hard again at various points, usually with some stroking. Not always. The buildup and chemistry matter. Every encounter is different.

My favorite is flip fucking. Lots of mutual ongoing anticipation and opportunities for breaks without having to stop.

[ICTJOCK]

Well I think it has largely been said.,  but I'll add my 2 cents.    I've been all over the place.  I'm primarily a bottom,  so if I'm with a client,  I almost am always hard getting going and sometimes am hard throughout the entire bottoming process,   sometimes not.

Really a variety of reasons,  but not being turned on certainly isn't one of them.    It can be number of clients,   just the events of the day,  but it could imply a lack of something with the client.     That usually doesn't happen.      I wouldn't assume if he isn't hard and doesn't climax,  he isn't having a good time,  however.

[jeezifonly]

We who enjoy XL toys and/or hands as part of anal play can have overall responses that vary even from our own norms of staying hard getting fucked by live dick. First, is the time factor - lots of gradual teasing, opening, etc combined with upsizing.

Something about the combo of girth and depth simultaneously yields a level of unique pleasure that doesn’t involve my own cock, but while experiencing deep waves of ecstasy from inside, I achieve the penile orgasm as well (minimal come…) in way that employs my softie like a clitoris. The hum capped by the bang. ‼️