Jamie21

I can identify, although I think maybe you are believing the pictures that others present. They’re not necessarily reality. I have some gay friends but I don’t tend to hang out with them at the club, sauna, beach etc like you describe. I don’t do that with my straight friends either…and the groups do mix. How I spend my time with friends doesn’t have much to do with our sexual orientation. I’m not bothered about going to gay clubs, or gay themed events. If the event is of interest to me then I’ll go regardless of whether it’s a gay or straight event. I think you’re not unusual nor do you have a gay bug spray! You don’t need to live in a gay social bubble or do only ‘gay things’ with gay friends. Do what you want with who you want. I accept that my attitude is probably extreme because I refuse to be part of any group (my contrarian streak) but I think you shouldn’t worry about what others seem to be doing. Just do things you like with people you like and ignore the gay / straight labels.

A big dick goes a long way if you work as a provider or in porn. You need other attributes of course but a big dick definitely helps to make a start.

Exactly! ….And often is all the better because it doesn’t have the pressure of penetrative sex, either as a top or bottom. Remove that expectation and you can be more relaxed, explore different things and simply enjoy the intimacy rather than feel like you’re working towards a goal. That’s why I think massage is a great way to explore intimacy.

Amazed that some guys don’t have a toothbrush etc. I carry one around. I’ve got my kit with me - toothbrush, mouthwash, wipes, massage oil, lube, douche bulb etc… Sometimes clients book at short notice “hi I’m staying at xxx and looking for a massage this afternoon etc”. If I’m out in town then I can accept the booking. There’s always somewhere at their hotel you can freshen up before meeting them. Having said that a few clients like me to not have showered beforehand and to be ‘fresh from the gym’. None have ever said ‘oh and eat onions or garlic and don’t brush your teeth’ though! I can live with that because I’m sure they tried. I just clean off and don’t make a big deal about it. There’s been occasions when I’ve bottomed and not felt completely confident about things…it’s a relief to see he’s not especially large 😂…so one can emphasise when slight mishaps occur. I think advice on preparation for inexperienced guys is a great service. No one seems to ask how should they prepare though. I once saw a client who had only just finished douching as I arrived (at his apartment). Things got predictably messy so he broke off mid session to douche some more, but it didn’t help. I had to advise him to prepare much earlier, and let things settle down.

Supposedly ‘indistinguishable physically, cognitively and emotionally from an actual human…and prepared to fulfill any desire’ wow. If that claim is true then perhaps it might take business 😕. Imagine it pounding away at you for hours… just as you’re about to cum the battery runs out 😂. I think if I had one of these I’d tell it my desires are for it to do stuff like take the bins out, clean the bathroom and make me tea.

Gold means he’s paying top price for advertising on RentMasseur. They have 3 levels and if you go for the top one (Gold) you get more features and prominence as a masseur. I do the Gold option because otherwise the site has limited use for me. Certified means he has sent to RM his massage qualification certificate. In some jurisdictions it’s mandatory to have such certification if you’re advertising massage services. I wouldn’t attach too much meaning to either if you’re thinking that these are indicative of quality. Best to look at reviews, see how long he’s been practicing and advertising, and go by how he responds to any enquiry.

If he advertises as doing erotic or sensual massage then you can safely assume he’ll offer at least a happy ending, probably more. If he advertises as therapeutic only then best not to ask about sexual elements. I prefer it when clients ask for exactly what they want. My advertising is clear I think that I offer sexual services but some clients still seem anxious to ask in case it offends me! Honestly it doesn’t offend me (nothing does, I’ve heard it all). I prefer it when clients are clear about what they want. if it’s something I wouldn’t want to include then I’ll just say ‘sorry I don’t do that’. No problem!

I think it’s more about how the client raises it. Yes, I do want to know if you’re inexperienced or really anxious because I think I can help with that. But some clients raise it in a way that implies that they’re a more attractive client for me: as in “I’m a virgin / really tight / straight and have never been with a guy and I really want you to do x…” etc. in the hope that I’ll offer a session for free. That’s a red flag. But if someone says “I’d like to book but I’ve not hired before and am worried about x” then that’s not a red flag: it just means I might need to engage a bit more than usual to answer his questions. I can tell when he’s a genuine inexperienced guy and when he’s fishing for a discount or wanting to sext.

Yes, if they’re both involved in the session. If one just wants to watch (it happens, some guys like watching) then I don’t charge extra.

I’d say it’s more likely for the price to go up if the client is difficult or unreliable more than if they’re older or not in great shape. Certainly I’m not bothered about age or shape and that never affects the price. Everyone pays the same. However, I do find clients who are disrespectful, unreliable (flaky) or not clean more difficult to see and so those people, if they come back, will attract a higher rate. Call it an ‘asshole premium’. Usually when I tell them the rate for their next visit they change their mind. Job done 🙂

I’m sure it happens because I know clients of mine who see other guys that I know, in some instances I have recommended them. I’ve also had other providers I know contact me about a client to ask if they’re genuine (as in reliable to turn up) because the client had mentioned he’d seen me. In a couple of those it was because the client had seen us both together in videos. Other times it’s because I get enquiries about 4 hands so I send the client the details of the guys I do that with. There’s a line though that one doesn’t cross whether it’s discussing other providers with clients or clients with providers and that’s details about their identity or their performance. People’s confidentiality is sacrosanct, so is their self esteem. I only say positive things if asked “would x be good?”. I’m happy to share if a client was flaky or wanted to negotiate on price but that’s it. What someone likes doing etc is not for me to share because it’s up to each individual (provider or client) to decide whether the other person is good for them.

Never works for me. My rates clear (no legal need to be coy about it here) and if the client wants a reduction on that it’s a “no” regardless of their reason. Negotiating on rates always ends up disappointing one party to the deal so why start the arrangement like that? If they want something that isn’t advertised then fine, make a proposal to me, but I usually find in those instances the client wants me to quote first.

I’ve been on prep for about 4 years. It’s now just natural to not use a condom and most guys I know don’t use them. Most clients I see don’t use them. If I go to a sex party (not often, maybe a few times a year) no one uses a condom. Prep has changed attitudes, on the whole I think for the good. I’m aware of the risks of other sexually transmitted infections… because catching something can affect my business but more importantly my health, therefore I get tested every month. I think if you are having bareback sex then it’s imperative to get tested regularly.

No decent provider will have any expectations of your performance. Honestly it doesn’t matter to them if you don’t stay hard long or you don’t shoot all over the place. What really matters is you’re a nice guy who turns up and enjoys himself. I do find it useful to know if you don’t cum when you orgasm, or if you might not get there (although I see that as a challenge ha ha). But none of this is of much importance to me as long as I can tell that you’re enjoying yourself….and if you are then I am too. Last week I saw a client who doesn’t cum when he orgasms - medical reasons. Another guy last week has a patch where his insulin is delivered (he removed the insulin line before we started but said he may need a bite to eat part way through - no problem). I had to avoid the patch area when massaging him. Another time a client had a pump thing he used to get his cock hard - he told me about that because you could feel it under the skin. I’ve had similar with guys who had a pacemaker thing in their chest. It’s really not unusual to see clients with conditions or things that they think might be a limiting factor in how their session runs. I find all of it interesting and to be honest it’s kind of flattering because they chose me for their session. It’s a turn on for me to know that this person laying on my massage table or in the bed had all the providers in London to choose and they saw my profile and said ‘yeah him, he looks ok’. Then they come and enjoy themselves, leave happy and even better they book again. How awesome is that! 😊. Most guys doing this work for any length of time will be doing it because they genuinely enjoy the job in the way I describe. Find one of those providers, tell him what you need to for your peace of mind and then let him do his thing. Relax, enjoy yourself, explore, smile, don’t take it too seriously or over think It. I would also say I agree massage would be a good idea, it’s nice to build intimacy and is like a seduction….and you’re right about the oil! The previous posters @jmichaeliiiand @dbar123 both said it too. They’re right. My perspective from a provider point of view is the same as theirs.

Ah yes I’m talking from a UK perspective. However I’m sure it’s more of a perceived risk than a real one? Especially so if you hire a guy who has been around a while and is well reviewed.

There’s no agreed definition. You best ask what’s included. I advertise sensual massage, sometimes clients request anal intercourse (give or receive) and other things across a range of activities. I’m open to discussing it as part of a sensual massage, and depending on what’s agreed my rate may vary. The important thing is that if you specifically want something included then ask your masseur. Someone advertising sensual or erotic will be open to such requests. Someone advertising therapeutic only should not be asked for any sexual type services.

I don’t like it much either. Couldn’t see what was wrong with the old design. Why do they change it so much? Just let it evolve slowly, don’t make wholesale changes.

It sounds like it’s intimacy you seek, and approval from other men. This need not be a sexual encounter: intimacy does not have lead to anything sexual and it’s best if that is not an obligation on you (or on the masseur). This is why I suggest a massage with a sensual masseur would be a good starting point for your exploration. Pick one of similar age, who seems to be understanding and empathetic (most are if they do this kind of work). Tell him what you’d like, with your limits clear. The session can unfold naturally and you only do what you’re comfortable with. Initially that may mean just being naked with a guy and enjoying his touch, his presence and most of all his approval. Once you’re comfortable with him you can go further in future sessions.

Lisbon? Porto? The Algarve? Do you want city activities or a resort? The sea will be cold for swimming…so maybe avoid that and do Lisbon. There’s plenty to see if you like history, great eating options, lively nightlife, Christmas markets and midnight mass. The people are friendly, it’s inexpensive and easy to travel around and it won’t be too busy with tourists. Bairro Alto is good in the nighttime, eat late and explore the area.

The few well known clients I’ve seen (a politician, a tv entertainer)- didn’t ask for one. I was invited to a party one time and sent an agreement to sign but it all seemed too shady so I declined 😂

Confidentiality agreements… could be he’s prepared to sign one rather than he requires one. High profile clients sometimes require such an agreement if you’re hired to entertain them.

Me too. Wasn’t easy for him. He’s back to his old effervescent self now, and is avoiding those nefarious types who led him down that path.

Could work but make sure they’re both ok with it before you hire, including what you want them to do together. Your experience with each separately may have been great but the dynamic changes a lot when there’s 3 or more of you. As always communication is key. If clients hire me to work with another guy (called a duo session) then they usually ask me to come up with some suggestions. There’s 5 of 6 providers I know well, have worked with and I know what they’re into. Similarly they know me so if the client wants us to focus on each during the session, as well as him, then we can do it. Some clients have seen me in films with other providers so they hire us for their session knowing that we can work together. It saves the risk of the guys they hire not working out especially given hiring 2 guys is costly. The other advantage of asking one guy for his suggestions is you can ask him to set it all up. Saves you liaising with 2 guys. What you might find with 2 guys who don’t know each other is that even though they might say they’re ok with what you want…when it comes to it in the session it doesn’t quite come off. I’d also suggest don’t book 3 guys. Not all at same time anyway. 4 is a bit awkward. If you want multiple guys hire someone to join a bit later and have him join as someone else leaves. A fresh person livens up the session after the first guy has done his thing. Your main hire can be booked for the whole session. It’s the best way for a longer session.

You sound sensible. If you’re able to do sex work and stay sane and clean of drugs etc it can set you up nicely. The trouble is it’s very difficult to keep grounded, especially if you’re young. I started at a more mature age, which has helped me keep things in perspective. The work can be exciting, well rewarded and it gives you a lot of flexibility, but there’s a dark side unless you’re careful. Had I found sex work at 19 I’m sure it would have eaten me up. A friend who started it around the same time as me found the dark side and it nearly got him. He’s younger than me and threw himself into the work, encouraged by the attention he got. He was fit, sexy etc and flew very close to the sun. He got involved with the wrong people and ended up on meth. His looks went, so did most of his money. He managed to hide what was happening to him for a long time but eventually it was unavoidable and he sought help. He gave me all his cash (not in a pea box unfortunately) to look after while he got himself back clean. Now he’s back to his former self but no longer escorts… just a bit of porn filming.

No it’s not true. That comment by the sociologist is I suspect made based on her assumptions rather than direct experience of the work.