nate_sf

For me, I don't mind if someone is rubbing one out to my pictures. I take it as a compliment! 😛

For some providers, there is an understanding that it is not OK to reach out to a client without being contacted first. This might be old-school, as there is lots of discussion about providers reaching out after having been viewed on RM, or contacting clients proactively. But for many like myself, it's considered an invasion of privacy to make unsolicited contact.

My exceptions are like as @ICTJOCK mentions, someone has checked out my profile a whole bunch of times so I figure something must have got their interest. Or if their profile invites providers to contact them I'll reach out. Or if traveling I'll let former clients know I'll be visiting. But otherwise I try to be discreet and wait for the client to approach.

If you're wanting providers to contact you if they are interested, put something in your profile that invites it. You could even describe a bit of what you're looking for, and invite those who fit the bill to get in touch.

16 hours ago, TonyDown said:

May I ask how

Descanso 

Twin Palms

and Santiago resorts compare?

 

I see the pricing on their Websites and they have some kind of relationship.  Same owner?

What I'd be interested in hearing is any pluses and minuses for each and your recommendation.

Santiago is the oldest? They brand themselves as a luxury resort.

 

I realize rooms may not be available in some cases.  But I'd still like to know your opinion for these resorts.

 

Thank you!

I've stayed at both Santiago and Descanso. As @sam.fitzpatrick mentioned, they are under the same ownership, as is Twin Palms. I was thinking of trying out Twin Palms this year just to do the full trifecta, but decided on InnDulge.

Santiago and Descanso have comparably good service and quality. Staff are very friendly and helpful, and the properties are well maintained. If I recall Santiago is a bit more lushly landscaped. Santiago is a larger resort, and with that comes a more expansive social scene. Descanso has a more intimate scale. Both have pools and hot tubs so you're not missing anything at one versus the other. Sometimes it just comes down to availability, which one has rooms. I can't speak for Twin Palms since I've never been there, but you can't go wrong with either Santiago or Descanso and I expect Twin Palms would be good as well.

6 minutes ago, Vegas_Millennial said:

Is it the one with you in the tub?  I can see it... And I only have a free Rentmen account.

That’s the one! So perhaps good times are here again… 😝

I checked out my listing using a browser that was not logged into my rentmen account, and at least for my own listing the full-frontal pic is still missing on rentmen.eu. But maybe others are having better luck!

On 11/6/2023 at 2:53 PM, marylander1940 said:

I remember meeting an escort in a sauna on Van Ness Avenue (San Francisco) and getting a private room. It was certainly fun but if I have to choose I'd rather a good bed.

I visited that place many times back in the day. It was referred to as "the hot tubs." Private rooms with a hot tub, shower, and bed. Not great but not awful, and it served a purpose. However the place closed several years ago. Meanwhile the day stay apps have become a better option for when it's not possible to host.

1 hour ago, BuffaloKyle said:

I'm waiting for someone to pop out and scream April Fool's, maybe Halloween Fool's actually.

I too have been wondering if we’re all being played here. But having been on the receiving end of some stalking, I know it happens. 

Well let's change this! I just posted a notice for an upcoming trip to Phoenix.

I think the reasons people have mentioned here make sense for why there haven't been posts in that forum. And the lack of posts creates a disincentive for those who might otherwise post there. I'd thought of posting for some past trips, but when I checked the forum and saw it was empty that put me off. It's like walking into an empty restaurant, and thinking there must be something wrong with the place otherwise there'd be people there.

I don't do a lot of travel though, so won't be able to contribute to that forum very often!

6 hours ago, CuriousByNature said:

Is there a reason why providers cannot move their profiles to Hunqz or another Europe-based site?  Perhaps RM operates as if it's the only viable option because nobody has challenged that characterization.

I tried Hunqz, and yes in theory it would be an alternative. The user interface is ok, not great but not terrible. But how do you get people to migrate there? When I had a profile there it was crickets...

I think the context here is important. This was a known trusted client, and the prospect of introducing the boyfriend into the mix had already been discussed. So it's not the same thing as having it just sprung out of nowhere. But yeah, surprises don't always go over well, so it probably would have been better if the client had said something ahead of time. Personally I would not have been too bent out of shape given the context.

When this has happened to me, usually the client at least mentions first that he wants to mix it up with a third, and asks if I'm ok with it. Once though many years ago I arrived at an appointment and all the client said was "a buddy stopped by, I hope you don't mind." As it turns out, the buddy was a porn star who'd I'd long admired, so I didn't mind! But it did throw me a bit, first with the surprise itself and then with who it was.

36 minutes ago, Jarrod_Uncut said:

Well in my case, I never ask lol.

Lol, yes I should have said "if one asks oneself." Though one of my Baltimore clients did mention that not a lot of guys come through there, but he also seemed to be into it so I didn't think too hard about it.

Also your point earlier about a city being good or bad the first time, and the opposite the next time rings true. I used to totally bomb in LA, to the point I said never again. But more recently when I've visited it's been decent. Either I've changed or LA has changed, or it's just luck of the draw.

This is the first I've heard about it, but I'm guessing RM will be phasing this change. I just moved a couple of dick pics from private to public, so we'll see if I get snared.

If this change sticks, it will require providers to develop yet another workaround. Providers in the US already have to do that with their fees. Some have their fees in an autoresponse in their instant messages. In my case I have a stand-alone web page with my rates that I point clients to. I suppose a stand-alone gallery might be in the cards... 😐

I realized I never reported back on this...

My parents tried Hello Fresh for a couple of weeks but discontinued it because it involved too much time and energy preparing the meals. They liked that they didn't have to go grocery shopping, and they liked the novelty of the dishes and thought it was fun, but said it was still a lot of work to prepare the meals. Mom can't stand for long periods so it was difficult for her.

I took a couple of kits myself to try it out, and yes it's a fair amount of work to put the meals together. However it was interesting, some of the preparation was more involved than my usual day-to-day cooking, so I felt like I was learning something. It could be good for someone who wants to hone their cooking skills a bit.

So with Hello Fresh out of the picture, I turned to craigslist and found a chef to come and prepare meals a couple of times a week. It took a couple of tries. The first chef was a real primadonna and ended up quitting when we asked him to reduce the sodium content. But he referred us to someone else, and he's been great. His cooking is not fancy but really good, and he makes enough so there are leftovers for a couple more days. Plus he is sexy AF, and super charming. They're very happy with the arrangement. And if M&D are happy, I'm happy!

13 hours ago, Jarrod_Uncut said:

I find I do best in; smaller enclave cities that aren’t so frequented. Tucson in Arizona, Santa Fe in New México, Oklahoma (though it’s not as busy like it used to be when I would go years show), Salt Lake City; Boise, Idaho…

I've found this too, I do well in the secondary cities. Last year I had a great time in Baltimore for example, meeting some solid clients (one of whom had me join him on a trip a few months later). There was also enough demand to stay longer if my schedule had allowed it.

It can be a bruise to one's ego if you ask whether they are hiring you because they're really into you, or are they just hiring because there are few local choices. But in the end, who cares! The important thing is that you're being hired.

I agree with the others that you need to advertise further in advance to get the right exposure. Try two or even three weeks in advance. You need to give people a bit of time to mull things over.

1 hour ago, azdr0710 said:

Anybody else getting an "account suspended" notice?

 

Yes. 

Maybe they got hacked? 

14 hours ago, AngusStevensxxx said:

A big red flag would be the amount of time this 'client' has spent talking to you adn sexting you -  Serious clients do not do that.

This is the most obvious red flag. Serious clients tend to get down to business without too much back-and-forth. Exception would be a client making arrangements for a more extended appointment or travel, that could justify more coordination. But eventually you'll develop an intuition for who's bullshitting and who's for real.

As for sharing nudes, there are photo collectors out there, or at least guys who are just curious and want to see your stuff even if they have no intention of booking. You'll have to decide if you're OK with that. Personally I don't care too much, I unlock my private pics for pretty much anyone who asks. There does not seem to be any correlation between who I unlock for vs. who books, at least in my experience. I always follow up by saying "I hope you like the pics" and some just reply yes and that's it, while others go ahead and book.

This is a variation of a very common scam. I get a variation of it about once a month, though it's never been from a woman. It usually mentions a very generous client who is traveling into town, is very specific with dates, etc. Often they say they are representing someone else and wanting to set things up on their behalf. They follow a similar pattern.

It’s ok to ask directly in advance. I’ve had guys contact me to ask about BB and if it’s ok to breed or cum inside (however you want to characterize it). So no need to be shy, if it’s important to you just ask. 

I’ve found paying to be a Sponsor gives good visibility and is worth the money. Same with RM of the Day, if you can find an available slot. 

I haven’t tried Platinum boost so can’t speak to that. 

On 8/30/2023 at 5:00 AM, ICTJOCK said:

The comment from the proposed client was that I would be "missing out"  on a profitable time.

In my experience this kind of manipulation is part of what to expect in an appointment where PNP is involved. I don't indulge, but have from time to time agreed to an appointment where the client indulges. In these instances I've found the issue is sense of time gets lost for the client, and it's hard to end these sessions within a reasonable timeframe (let alone get paid).

Last time I was in Palm Springs I went with a buddy to the Bear Wear store:

They had a lot of fun, stylish things for big guys. I think the swim shorts look especially good on a big guy. However unfortunately their website shows most of their offerings being modeled on slim, chiseled bodies, which seems counterproductive. I'm guessing these are the stock images that are provided by the manufacturers. In any case, the swim shorts and the short/shirt sets are fun and look good.

Lots of great suggestions here. Ultimately the only way to see what it's like is to give it a try.

I still remember my first client, back when I was just a young(er) thing. I had a severe case of imposter syndrome, and wondered whether I could really carry this off. Would someone actually pay me for this? Not only did he say he had a good time, but also said I was not charging enough. That seemed like a good confirmation.

Initially I was advertising erotic massage, but after the first few massages I realized I really liked the sex part better. I know masseurs who say the exact opposite, so some of this is figuring out what you really enjoy. For me, I decided I wanted to offer escort services, and I really enjoy it.

It can take a while to get traction as well. New and fresh will have appeal, but others will wait around until they've seen your listing for a while. So it's important to keep the listing going for a while so that potential clients will be thinking of you over time. Don't be alarmed if things take a bit of time to get going, and as the saying goes, don't quit your day job just yet. On Rentmen you need to get at least the Gold subscription, as nobody will see you in a crowded market if you have a Basic listing. Signing onto a sponsor listing can also really broaden your visibility.

On the other hand, you may be a wild success right out the gate, and then you'd have the issue of how to manage your time and not get burned out. I've known some really busy guys, and being able to manage the volume has been an issue for them. Or if you're keeping your day job and trying to accommodate a busy hiring schedule, that can be stressful too so put some thought into how to balance things so you're in a good space for your clients and for yourself.

This site is a great sounding board so don't be a stranger!

Happy Birthday PK! May all your wildest dreams cum true… 😛

16 hours ago, mike carey said:

The one thing I might have done differently in my situation as it was then, was take the pickup truck Avis offered me, so I'd fit in. I didn't have the right hat though.

Lol I’ve rented pickup trucks on more than one occasion so I’d fit in with the local context. The prices are usually really good, and it feels so butch! 

6 hours ago, 56harrisond said:

BAY AREA/SAN FRANCISCO

Crime is so bad near S.F. Federal building employees are told to work from home, officials said
Megan Cassidy
Updated: Aug. 11, 2023 7:02 p.m.

Officials at the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services advised hundreds of employees in San Francisco to work remotely for the foreseeable future due to public safety concerns outside the Nancy Pelosi Federal Building on Seventh Street. 

The imposing, 18-story tower on the corner of Seventh and Mission streets houses various federal agencies, including HHS, the U.S. Department of Labor, the U.S. Department of Transportation and the office of Speaker Emerita Nancy Pelosi. The area is also home to one of the city’s most brazen open-air drug markets, where dozens of dealers and users congregate on a daily basis. 

HHS Assistant Secretary for Administration Cheryl R. Campbell issued the stay-home recommendation in an Aug. 4 memo to regional leaders.

“In light of the conditions at the (Federal Building) we recommend employees … maximize the use of telework for the foreseeable future,” Campbell wrote in the memo, a copy of which was obtained by The Chronicle. 

“This recommendation should be extended to all Region IX employees, including those not currently utilizing telework flexibilities,” Campbell wrote, referring to the federal government zone that includes California and other Western states.

The memo came on the same day that, according to Axios, President Biden’s White House chief of staff called for more federal employees to return to their offices after years of remote work due to the COVID-19 pandemic. 

It was not immediately clear whether other tenants in the building had issued similar directives. Officials with Pelosi’s office and the Department of Labor said they have been working closely with local and federal law enforcement to ensure safety for their staffers, but they have not advised employees to work from home. 

The building has long been a locus of some of the city’s most intractable problems. 

Dozens of dealers routinely plant themselves on, next to or across the street from the property, operating in shifts as users smoke, snort or shoot up their recent purchases. The property’s concrete benches are an especially popular site for users to get high, socialize or pass out. 

While Pelosi’s five-person staff was not advised to work remotely, she raised concerns about the building’s tenant safety last week in a meeting with the U.S. attorney for the northern district of California, according to officials with her office. 

“The safety of workers in our federal buildings has always been a priority for Speaker Emerita Pelosi, whether in the building or on their commutes,” Pelosi spokesperson Aaron Bennett said in a statement. 

“Federal, state and local law enforcement — in coordination with public health officials and stakeholders — are working hard to address the acute crises of fentanyl trafficking and related violence in certain areas of the city.”

Pelosi recently secured more federal law enforcement assistance in cracking down on the city’s fentanyl crisis in the Tenderloin and SoMa areas. San Francisco is one of the cities included in a federal program called Operation Overdrive, which targets drug traffickers in areas with the highest levels of drug-related violence and overdoses. 

The Speaker Nancy Pelosi Federal Building is maintained by the federal General Services Administration, and policing is handled by Federal Protective Services. 

Richard Stebbins, a public affairs officer for GSA, said the agency coordinates with San Francisco police to enhance safety outside of the building, which includes routine patrols and camera systems around the perimeter of the building. 

“The building is a safe and secure space for federal employees and the visiting public,” Stebbins said in an email to the Chronicle. “There are a number of security controls GSA employs to make sure the building is safe including Federal Protective Services officers at the building and secure checkpoints.”

Officials with the Department of Homeland Security, which oversees the Federal Protective Service, did not immediately respond to a request for comment. 

But a tenant of the building familiar with recent decisions said the agency and GSA have recently implemented a number of new security measures to address safety concerns. This included pulling FPS personnel from other nearby properties for additional security, a pending vote on funds for an additional “roving” guard dedicated to the property, and creating a “BART Buddies” program that has escorts on call from 4:30 p.m. to 5:30 p.m. to walk employees to and from BART. 

Evan Sernoffsky, a spokesperson for the San Francisco Police Department, said officers are working with local, state and federal partners to address the drug crisis in the Tenderloin and South of Market neighborhoods. 

“This work includes seizing an unprecedented amount of fentanyl this year while also arresting drug dealers,” he said. “The SFPD is also making arrests when people are openly using and creating a danger to themselves or others.”

It's always possible to cherry-pick news stories to suit one's narrative. This can also be done to present a more positive narrative. Here are headlines from this past week that present a more optimistic narrative:

From the San Francisco Business Times:

• "San Francisco Sees Siginficant Jump in Return-To-Office Study"
• "IKEA on Market Street Set to Open This Month." The story mentions that "San Francisco is the first pioneering U.S. site for the company's new urban-centric format..."

From the San Francisco Standard:

• "Out-of-Town Zillow Users Are Lusting After San Francisco Property"
• "Downtown San Francisco’s Return to Office Highest Since Covid"

Interestingly, the San Francisco Chronicle is really, really negative. I had a hard time "cherry-picking" any positive stories from that source.

My earlier observation that vast majority of the city looks great also implicitly acknowledges that some areas do not look great. And yes, the Federal Building on 7th Street is an awful blighted mess. 6th Street had traditionally been the City's "Hamsterdam," but it has become marginally better in recent years. Meanwhile, 7th Street has declined. Seems like the trouble has migrated towards 7th.

The design of the Federal Building doesn't do any favors. Generally I like modern architecture, but that building is just butt-ugly. It's built like a fortress, and was further fortified after 9-11, so its perimeter is a no-man's land that is conducive to nefarious acts. I didn't know that policing of the building is handled by Federal Protective Services. We all know that there are legal limitations to prohibiting people from camping on the streets, despite the blight it brings, thanks to that frustrating court decision. So I suppose the Fed's hands are tied on that one. But it seems like the drug dealing could be cleaned up.