Colder and Short DMs on RM

[Guav_42]

So I’ve been DMing some people on RM and I notice the DMs are a little short and cold. I would think they’d be a bit warmer and enthusiastic considering they do charge quite a bit. Sometimes I get like one or two word answers.

I’m new to this so is this typical for RM? Is it really just more straight and to the point? Just makes me feel a bit uneasy since I haven’t done this before.

[jmichaeliii]

11 minutes ago, Guav_42 said:

So I’ve been DMing some people on RM and I notice the DMs are a little short and cold. I would think they’d be a bit warmer and enthusiastic considering they do charge quite a bit. Sometimes I get like one or two word answers.

I’m new to this so is this typical for RM? Is it really just more straight and to the point? Just makes me feel a bit uneasy since I haven’t done this before.

Very common and frustrating.  I move on if nothing improves on the second message.  There are many choices and many are happy to interact with you.

[DMonDude]

Definitely has been my experience so far after hiring for a little over a year. I've never really thought much of it though. I'm just trying to quickly set something up same as them, i don't need fake flowery intro messages personally. But i know many others enjoy that part.

Well reviewed popular guys are getting dozens of messages a day and, if they're properly booked and busy, don't have time write a more drawn out thoughtful message. If they did, I'd personally assume it was a copy/paste auto response or an AI generated message anyway, which would be more off putting to me than a short message they typed.

I usually get more cordial or casual messaging from them once I've booked and especially after I've hired and come back or become a regular.

Edited May 6 by DMonDude

[+ ApexNomad]

56 minutes ago, Guav_42 said:

So I’ve been DMing some people on RM and I notice the DMs are a little short and cold. I would think they’d be a bit warmer and enthusiastic considering they do charge quite a bit. Sometimes I get like one or two word answers.

I’m new to this so is this typical for RM? Is it really just more straight and to the point? Just makes me feel a bit uneasy since I haven’t done this before.

More and more over the years, straight-to-the-point has kind of become the norm. Finding providers who take the time to be a little warmer and more conversational (within reason, of course) can take some trial and error.

I also agree with the previous comment that once you’ve actually booked, or especially after you’ve had an appointment with someone, the messaging often changes completely, usually in a good way. Finding a regular that you really enjoy changes everything and you want to keep those.

[SecretProvider]

I saw a guys profile the other day and he gave advice as to how to reach out and I thought it was fantastic - Short, simple, polite, and serious!

Hello, my name is (Desired name) 
I’m in (Desired City) and i would like to get together with you (Desired date and time) 
I’m interested in ( Desired information)

I can almost guarantee that you will get a good reply if you use this template with a solid provider. I think a good general rule is = you get the same energy back you put into the message.

[soloyo215]

21 hours ago, Guav_42 said:

So I’ve been DMing some people on RM and I notice the DMs are a little short and cold. I would think they’d be a bit warmer and enthusiastic considering they do charge quite a bit. Sometimes I get like one or two word answers.

I’m new to this so is this typical for RM? Is it really just more straight and to the point? Just makes me feel a bit uneasy since I haven’t done this before.

I think it's common. I'm no expert, but it could be that some guys are not that experienced. I get that type of messages from fairly new providers and some who are very young.

BTW, the opposite also happens. I've gotten long list pf services provided and other messages that could be more succinct.

Edited May 7 by soloyo215

[Cretus]

In my experience:

Sometimes, RM chat has a weird thing that clears out everything you’ve been previously typing.

More importantly, lengthy convos are things that some time-wasters jack off to. 
 

Providers want to have signs that a paid meeting will occur, and that you are not taking advantage of their time for free. I see warnings in bios now too: providers are tired of being  contacted by of scammers, free-jerkers, and time wasters on the site . 
 

Once you meet with them, they could indeed become more verbose. 

Edited May 7 by Cretus

[PedroThreeTimes]

On 5/6/2026 at 11:51 PM, SecretProvider said:

I saw a guys profile the other day and he gave advice as to how to reach out and I thought it was fantastic - Short, simple, polite, and serious!

Hello, my name is (Desired name) 
I’m in (Desired City) and i would like to get together with you (Desired date and time) 
I’m interested in ( Desired information)

I can almost guarantee that you will get a good reply if you use this template with a solid provider. I think a good general rule is = you get the same energy back you put into the message.

I honestly, gushed from reading this template message as opposed to the usual “rates?”

[TxDaddyBear]

A lot of us are probably wary because many times we get people posing as clients so they can get whack off material or SOMETHING (who knows) from us. So they pump me for information and photos, say they will be in my town in a week, and they will get back with me to book time. Never to be heard from them again, unless they are like a few of the nuttier ones I get who change emails, phone numbers, or even their voices on the phone to get their next whack off session material. Providers are not getting paid when we chat with you, so they are trying to get one over on us. Haha. So I am very cautious with who I am going to spend my time chatting with and how long, and sometimes, they don't even show up either. It's always a gamble.

[jony]

I've been getting these 1-2 word answers more often from providers well reviewed here (described as "passionate", "attentive") than newer ones, even with that template intro message. It made me doublecheck if I was messaging the right person. But I imagine they must be busier. Guess we'll see if they're friendlier in person. 

 

[+ Jamie21]

It’s unfortunate but so many potential clients are just fishing for pics or sex chat with no or little intention to book. It makes one wary of engaging in too much back and forth to build a rapport. Plus there’s the time issue, how much time am I going to invest in a chat where someone is needing to be persuaded to book. Very little because those guys are usually flaky, they’ll book but then cancel nearer the time or even no show. So it’s not worth too much time to engage. Best approach is as someone said earlier ‘hi I’d like to book a session at 3 on Wednesday etc’. That will get a positive response. You can the ask any follow up questions. The best clients (those that get responses) have done their research and decided to book. It’s just a question of details after that. 

[Johnnyroad]

I must admit that I sometimes request to see the private pictures without communicating directly 🤭.

I got blocked after requesting a 5th tim, and to be honest it’s probably irritating for a provider to experience. 

You can definitely see increasing concern about time wasters in provider’s bios now. I increasingly see “serious only” on their profiles , and it’s probably to ward off time wasters and picture jerk-offers who don’t intend to meet.

 

my thoughts on Jony:

I think that providers probably get a lot of people who simply don’t intend to book, so they don’t invest a lot of words into interactions pre-meeting.

3 hours ago, jony said:

I've been getting these 1-2 word answers more often from providers well reviewed here (described as "passionate", "attentive") than newer ones, even with that template intro message. It made me doublecheck if I was messaging the right person. But I imagine they must be busier. Guess we'll see if they're friendlier in person. 

 

 

[+ SirBillybob]

Booking communication is performative but calls for practicality, style of course tied into branding, whereas service delivery is a different curated skill set. The hire may come across as cryptic or taciturn in planning, yet the session itself may prove so satisfying (or not) that any presumed halo effect linking “good DM energy” to actual meet quality starts looking less objective than originally imagined.

My experiential take is dearth of correlation along with consistent predictive capability. I acknowledge that brevity in texted planning and the trend of good fortune in consummation undermines the solid determination of an association between the parasocial scaffolding and the down and dirty.  

For added context, mine don’t in the least charge “quite a bit”, assuming that descriptor relates to the $ figures I routinely notice within this chatroom. I expect courtesy as a mutual general standard, not a quality baked into compensation. 

That said, a client might appreciate a romantic and flirtatious “Will you accept this rose?” in order to seal the deal. The heart being a lonely hunter, it wants what it wants. 

Edited 7 hours ago by SirBillybob

[Nue2thegame]

I don’t think that you’d make it as an RM provider based on your DM style (if the above is a fair representation).