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Posted

A podcast is interviewing me soon. We’re going to talk about m4m sex work. The audience is primarily gay men and other LGBTQ+ folks, but isn’t as knowledgeable as most of you here on The Company of Men. Most of them have never hired a masseur or sex worker before. They will want to know all the basics. It’s hard for me to step back and put myself in the shoes of someone who knows almost nothing about the profession, or perhaps has misconceptions about our work.

What questions would you ask me?

What do you think I should cover?

Is there anything you would like other men who are interested in men to know about hiring? Any advice for them?

Some topic ideas:

General

What is sex work?

Who does sex work? 

Who hires sex work?

Why is sex work important and valuable?

Is sex work really work?

Economics

How much do sex workers make?

Why does it cost so much?

What about discounts?

Do I tip my sex worker? How much?

How do I receive the best value for my money?

Do sex workers pay taxes?

What methods of payment can I use?

Risks, Personal Safety

Is sex work legal?

Is sex work safe?

What about STIs?

Will I get in trouble?

Are sex workers discreet?

Will anyone find out?

How do sex workers screen?

How do I select a good sex worker?

How do I avoid fraud and scams?

Practical Matters

Cum

Erections

Performance

Stamina

Hygiene

Sex roles, preferences

Communication 

Expectations

Other

Why do you do this work?

Do sex workers have romantic relationships?

 

Posted

Looks like a very comprehensive list -more than you could likely cover in an hour. I’d echo Nightowl and address how initial contact is typically conducted and some basic etiquette. Also, you might want to discreetly mention the existence of forums (like CoM) which provide much more information including reviews. 

Posted

I did a podcast. Was good fun. Good luck with it @Simon Suraci

It is hard to put oneself in the shoes of someone who isn’t a sex worker. One becomes a bit blasé about it all. My experience was that people are intrigued by the work and have a lot of misconceptions about it, such as you have sex all day, you make loads of money and you live a jet set lifestyle. If only. I found they’re interested in the things that show those misconceptions aren’t necessarily correct. Yes some days I have a lot of sex, make money and go to interesting places but most days I’m dealing with flakes, making zero, and washing towels at home. 

Posted
1 hour ago, Nightowl said:

Will you be able to provide a link here to the podcast once it’s done? Would love to listen to it.

Same here.

 

3 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

I did a podcast.

Is this available somewhere?

Posted

Q: How do you balance/maintain your personal romantic relationship(s)?  How do you separate (sex) work from real-life (sex) situations?  How do your real-life romantic partners feel about your work?

I believe if anyone seriously invests the time and energy in studying the countless topics here in CoM, he can probably write a nonfiction, how-to book about the various aspects of sex work, from both the providers' and clients' viewpoints.  For the creative type, he can even fictionalize all the discussions found on CoM.  CoM is truly a not-so-hidden treasure chest.

Posted (edited)
On 10/23/2025 at 9:46 AM, Simon Suraci said:

A podcast is interviewing me soon. We’re going to talk about m4m sex work. The audience is primarily gay men and other LGBTQ+ folks, but isn’t as knowledgeable as most of you here on The Company of Men. Most of them have never hired a masseur or sex worker before. They will want to know all the basics. It’s hard for me to step back and put myself in the shoes of someone who knows almost nothing about the profession, or perhaps has misconceptions about our work.

What questions would you ask me?

What do you think I should cover?

Is there anything you would like other men who are interested in men to know about hiring? Any advice for them?

Some topic ideas:

General

What is sex work?

Who does sex work? 

Who hires sex work?

Why is sex work important and valuable?

Is sex work really work?

Economics

How much do sex workers make?

Why does it cost so much?

What about discounts?

Do I tip my sex worker? How much?

How do I receive the best value for my money?

Do sex workers pay taxes?

What methods of payment can I use?

Risks, Personal Safety

Is sex work legal?

Is sex work safe?

What about STIs?

Will I get in trouble?

Are sex workers discreet?

Will anyone find out?

How do sex workers screen?

How do I select a good sex worker?

How do I avoid fraud and scams?

Practical Matters

Cum

Erections

Performance

Stamina

Hygiene

Sex roles, preferences

Communication 

Expectations

Other

Why do you do this work?

Do sex workers have romantic relationships?

 

Here's my take on it from a client's perspective:

You don't live and work in places where sex work is legal, so I'd be circumspect with some answers.  Hell, I wouldn't volunteer specific information with respect to the economics of being a sex worker regardless of legality.

I've watched some YouTube videos where the interviewee was doing sex work but obviously not doing so well.  I assume your success in this business will prevent you from coming across that way, but I always feel bad when watching someone's video where their misery is palpable and I imagine the only reason they are baring their soul is they are being paid to do so.  

Edited by maninsoma
Posted (edited)

Comprehensive question list.

Always make sure to add an anecdote about the funniest session you had. I read an article like this, and it started with a client who paid the provider to let him teach the escort Russian (and nothing else during the session).

Edited by DrownedBoy
clarify
Posted

The interviewers may wonder about your social background (family relationships, abuse, etc.), whether drug use is common, and whether you or your clients experience stings or other legal issues. Many gays assume the most dark aspects of sex work and sex workers and you may get some “well meaning” version questions that seem naive or more likely to come from a straight person.

Posted
17 minutes ago, SometimesBi said:

One important question that I still don't know the correct answer for:

What is the proper way to measure your penis? 

And followup: how to translate the big lengths guys list in most ads. What to really expect when a guy says 10" 

 

a question that’s been debated for millennia…

Posted (edited)

From ChatGPT:

Volume appropriately captures length and girth. In fluid mechanics, displacement, eg, of water occurs when a dick is immersed in a fluid, pushing it out of the way and taking its place. The volume of the fluid displaced can then be measured, and from this, the volume of the immersed dick can be deduced: the volume of the immersed dick will be exactly equal to the volume of the displaced fluid. Convert millimetres to cubic centimetres. 

If you are using the method in which the water is initially filled to the top of a receptacle and the displaced water spills and is captured for measurement, as opposed to measuring the difference between a lower and higher water line, don’t jiggle the water receptacle, high dive or springboard your dick into the water, or splash your dick around unnecessarily; that’s cheating. 

Edited by SirBillybob
Posted
1 hour ago, SirBillybob said:

From ChatGPT:

Volume appropriately captures length and girth. In fluid mechanics, displacement, eg, of water occurs when a dick is immersed in a fluid, pushing it out of the way and taking its place. The volume of the fluid displaced can then be measured, and from this, the volume of the immersed dick can be deduced: the volume of the immersed dick will be exactly equal to the volume of the displaced fluid. Convert millimetres to cubic centimetres. 

If you are using the method in which the water is initially filled to the top of a receptacle and the displaced water spills and is captured for measurement, as opposed to measuring the difference between a lower and higher water line, don’t jiggle the water receptacle, high dive or springboard your dick into the water, or splash your dick around unnecessarily; that’s cheating. 

So that's what Archimedes did that make him jump out of the tub naked and yell 'Eureka' 😂

Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, DrownedBoy said:

So that's what Archimedes did that make him jump out of the tub naked and yell 'Eureka' 😂

Exactly. He was emotionally buoyant. And as a result of witnessing the power of an object to displace a primary element, inspired to invent the screw pump. 

Edited by SirBillybob
Posted
3 hours ago, SirBillybob said:

From ChatGPT:

Volume appropriately captures length and girth. In fluid mechanics, displacement, eg, of water occurs when a dick is immersed in a fluid, pushing it out of the way and taking its place. The volume of the fluid displaced can then be measured, and from this, the volume of the immersed dick can be deduced: the volume of the immersed dick will be exactly equal to the volume of the displaced fluid. Convert millimetres to cubic centimetres. 

If you are using the method in which the water is initially filled to the top of a receptacle and the displaced water spills and is captured for measurement, as opposed to measuring the difference between a lower and higher water line, don’t jiggle the water receptacle, high dive or springboard your dick into the water, or splash your dick around unnecessarily; that’s cheating. 

An ad that describes the provider’s cock as 1.7 cups just doesn’t sound as exciting as one that says 9”

Posted
3 hours ago, Nightowl said:

An ad that describes the provider’s cock as 1.7 cups just doesn’t sound as exciting as one that says 9”

24.5 cubic inches in 1.7 cups. That sounds more dangerous than sexy. 🙅‍♂️

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