Occasional

A good few years ago now, I hired a Brazilian escort from the UK (heavyweight) website Sleepyboy for a fairly local incall in London - about 5 miles from the centre. Went well, added him to my favourites. A couple of weeks later, turned up the profile to see new name, new phone number, new photos - but still the same address (as can be deduced from feeding in the (very granular) UK postcode into the SB search function then 'search for nearest' and see "0.0 miles") In fact - a new escort! Another change of escort a few weeks later. I came to the conclusion that the premises were a word-of-mouth 'first stop' for newly arrived Brazilians getting themselves sorted, cutting their teeth with escorting with the benefits of the mentorship of the last-most-recent arrival and a long-ago-created profile showing a reassuring six-figure hit number on the profile. They would then move more centrally, create their own profile with the confidence that comes from a bit of experience, and up their rates. Quite a neat 'production line' !

There's two sorts of 'just laying there'. The 'good' sort is 'lay back, relax, get comfortable, and I'll see to you ... " with the escort having a willing, involved and pleasure-anticipating frame of mind. The 'bad sort' is a complete lack of interest and engagement.

.. but of course, they're not at all experienced with this sort of thing. So it's all subcontracted out to Thailand. Bangcock, to be precise.

Leather boots and denim jacket would be more my thing ...

I feel I might be tempted by a straight guy who makes it clear in his profile that he's looking to receive oral. Men give the best blow jobs! At some level, I think that a lot of straight guys realise that. And I get pleasure from giving men pleasure - when I'm in the mood for that. A competent massage as a warm-up would add to the appeal . . .

I would extend that to read "explicitly say otherwise outside the current session . That is, your hard limits can't be breached - even by you - on the spur of the moment in the excitement of it all.

Sadly, I'm not surprised at all. One of my pet peeves with the site Sleepyboy here in London (UK) is the large number of providers whose 'nearest [tube, metro] station' is miles away from their location according to the map at the end of the profile, which is driven off the postcode that they enter. They move, they update one but not the other.

When they tell you their real name?

Were this a real-life personal relationship (as distinct from paid-for provider-client relationship) I would see this as you prematurely jumping to seek to solve the problem rather than initially 'holding space' for the upset party to feel their upset, and you acknowledging that you hear their pain. The closer and more significant the personal relationship, the more time, effort and energy I would put into the 'holding phase', waiting for the other party to 'move' (e.g. they might 'move' to "I do actually feel that you .. [whatever]"). I'd have no problem expressing sorrow that an uncomfortable situation has arisen - sorrow is an emotion, it's not the same as guilt, not an admission of blame or culpability. Note that I wrote 'waiting for the other party to 'move'. Not waiting indefinitely under the spell of round-and-round-in-circles attempted guilt-tripping, nor the other party's ramping-up ("the more I think about it, the worse I feel"). And certainly not submitting myself to the dynamic "I feel bad due to you, now it's your job to work out exactly why I feel bad and what you can do about it, then do it, and then I'll likely still feel bad and it'll be your job to .. etc etc". With a provider, I would cut short the energy and effort that I put into the 'holding space'. Perhaps "I'm sorry you feel like that, perhaps best if I give you space to process it, and we can chat again in a few days". With a regular (only) provider with whom I'd had a good rapport (only), I'd take the initiative to get back in touch after a few days and re-open along the lines "I'm hoping we can get back on track .. what if anything can I do towards that?". I'd be prepared for (likely) spin-it-out ploys : "I don't know" [response: "well, I'm afraid that I don't either, so it looks as if we [exit-wording]" - "apologise" ("I don't feel I've done anything wrong, so [exit-wording])", etc. OTOH I might hear "really sorry about that, I got triggered due to childhood baggage/ problem with SO / etc, I feel embarrassed, can we put it behind us" or "actually, I came to see it's a donation thing - a discount shouldn't of course mean exclusivity but, even so, can we agree to resume on the basis of my standard fee". While I enjoy it when there's rapport and good chemistry with providers, I don't 'do' drama and emotional embroilment with them. Which is one of the reasons that I hire. It's not within your power to make him pick up on, and feel, your positive vibes towards him rather than him choosing (albeit subliminally) to wallow in "I'm hurt, over to you to sort it".

So that you wake up with them! For me, the cherry on the cake of an overnight session is to wake up feeling refreshed and relaxed right next to an attractive, naked young man in bed with me. My hand gently finds his thigh and then slides up his leg to gently fondle his cock and balls, mentally reliving the actvities of the previous night and pleasurably anticipating a further round of action in the comfort of our warm bed .....

... yes, you'll certainly need a light when filming action where the sun doesn't shine .. <cough>

Depends on my mood. And if I'm in the mood to scratch the itch with certain kinks, the top-vers-bottom axis doesn't always matter that much.

Reminded me of a notorious vice bust many years ago here in London. Prostitution per se is not illegal in England, for a single provider working in private. Beyond that, there's a forest of legal no-nos: soliciting in public, pimping, running a brothel, and the quaint 'living on immoral earnings' which, I recall, once saw a respectable businessman convicted (and upheld on appeal) because his tenant was - unknown to him - working as a prostitute from the flat he'd rented to her, so that the rent he received from her was 'immoral'. But I digress. From https://www.thejusticegap.com/a-very-bad-case-of-brothel-keeping/ " In her home [in suburban London] [Cynthia Payne] held sex parties ... a flat fee included food, drink, a film, a live show and the sexual services of one woman. The fame of Cynthia’s parties spread and women who sought to sell sexual services were attracted to her establishment, some of those present at the premises [when the police raided] on 4th December 1978 were there simply to earn extra cash for Christmas. But this very British carry-on came to an end after an anonymous letter was sent to police. The simple offence of keeping a brothel would have only allowed a magistrate to sentence her at most to six months in prison and so [the police] relied on an offence which existed at common law ... the offence of keeping a disorderly house. The definition of that offence dated back to 1751, but the offence itself dated back to the time of [King] Henry 3rd [reigned 1216-1272] , when parliament became concerned that a group of women had set up a brothel just south of Fleet Street [in London] and close to a Friary. When Cynthia Payne appeared at the ... Inner London Crown Court, in April 1979 she faced 21 charges and was represented by [a] prominent human rights barrister ... She pleaded guilty to only three charges of controlling prostitution and one of keeping a disorderly house. The facts put before the court, which were undisputed, were that those present on the day of her arrest were all consenting adults who chose to be there. It was accepted by the prosecution that Cynthia [Payne] had not recruited the women. There was no question of coercion or corruption by her. The clients knew perfectly well what they were doing, none of the neighbours complained and the women were not obliged to have sex and could say no. It was a safe establishment for them to trade in with no dangers. The police superintendent in charge of the case gave evidence to the court that Cynthia’s clients were principally middle aged and elderly business men, managing directors [=CEOs] accountants, barristers, solicitors [=attorneys, lawyers], a member of parliament [lawmaker] for Ireland, a member of the House of Lords and not to forget several vicars [=priests]. " ----- Payne was sentenced to 18 months imprisonment (reduced to six months on appeal) and none of the men were charged - there was nothing to charge them with. Word at the time was that the very highest-profile customers were discreetly shown out of the back door by the police when they raided and never appeared on the list of customer names. That list was never made public, although it was produced to the judges in the case. Conspicuous by its absence in the categories of customer above is ... ... judges. Enough said.

I actually ask the provider to count it "to save any misunderstanding". With modern plastic banknotes that can stick together, it's as much for my benefit as theirs!

If you create a free account with Sleepyboy, after logging in you'll find an option "Make a Request", which leads to a page where you can post a message that all escorts can see. I was pleasantly surprised when I used that facility some time ago to say I was seeking a provider who was definitely into my kink, rather than simply including it in the list of options on their profile and being perfunctory and transactional when it came to it. I had a number of thoughful and encouraging replies from providers, which helped me forward. Maybe that might work for you, too? Also DM'd you.