Why not masturbate?

[Archangel]

There’s also the “pathetic” angle if you “need” to masturbate it must mean you aren’t able to win over someone for the real thing.

[Nightowl]

On 1/30/2025 at 5:42 PM, Angel-Ayy said:

Considering I'm home from work, naked, and masturbating, I wanted to resurrect this thread 😂

What are some other techniques or grips you use (apart from the standard-closed-fist-jerk)?

Grab your dick with one hand to hold it steady and rub the open palm of your other hand in a circular motion over the tip. The feeling is very intense. I don’t usually cum that way but it doesn’t take many “traditional” strokes after that to get me to explode.

[soloyo215]

On 1/21/2025 at 2:08 PM, Angel-Ayy said:

I remember when growing up that it was seen as extremely embarrassing if it was discovered that you masturbate.

I hear young people continuing this trend today. They say things like, "your only GF/BF is your left hand!"

I've heard other adults in my life complain that they caught their spouse masturbating to porn, and they made a big deal about how it's a "pathetic" and "sad."

 

I've never seen it that way. I've always enjoyed a good stroke session. I'm married, and my spouse knows that I'm masturbate, and I know that he does as well.

My question is... WHY do you think people have such a strong reaction against it? Why does it get a bad rep?

In the USA, it's part of the puritan and christian heritages. It's more tolerable to kill than to masturbate. The place that they give to anything sexual is beyond belief. Spouses that have that attitude towards their partners masturbating to porn are just projecting their own insecurities and inadequacies around it.

Masturbation is just men being men, nothing more. We do it, we like it, and we enjoy it. The rest is just nobody's business.

[CuriousByNature]

1 hour ago, soloyo215 said:

It's more tolerable to kill than to masturbate.

I'm assuming this is hyperbole - lol.  

I agree it shouldn't be anyone's business.  It is unfortunate that the misunderstanding of texts led to some very twisted ideas regarding the body, sexuality, and sexual expression - particularly during the later Victorian era.  Vestiges of that period likely continue to factor into many people's moral standards.  It also might explain why nobody names their son 'Onan' anymore...  

 

[Archangel]

It’s not just the Abrahamic traditions that censure masturbation.

[soloyo215]

19 hours ago, CuriousByNature said:

I'm assuming this is hyperbole - lol. 

 

Well, maybe. If you watch the Investigation Discovery channel, there's a show named "Deadly Women", where they feature crimes committed by women. Other shows also have episodes of people who have killed their spouses to avoid the shame of divorce, or because the spouse was masturbating or deriving sexual pleasure from something other than another person.

So yes, there are people who seem to think that murder is less embarrassing than sex.

[CuriousByNature]

3 hours ago, soloyo215 said:

Well, maybe. If you watch the Investigation Discovery channel, there's a show named "Deadly Women", where they feature crimes committed by women. Other shows also have episodes of people who have killed their spouses to avoid the shame of divorce, or because the spouse was masturbating or deriving sexual pleasure from something other than another person.

So yes, there are people who seem to think that murder is less embarrassing than sex.

I would hope it has more to do with an undiagnosed mental illness than embarrassment about sex...  

[+ purplekow]

On 1/21/2025 at 10:29 PM, CuriousByNature said:

I could never engage in Onanism, lest I grow hair on the palms of my hands.

But seriously, I've heard that the 'sin' of Onanism (self-pleasuring to climax) is a much later misinterpretation of a Biblical passage where the character Onan spills his seed on the ground, rather than fulfilling the levirate obligation of consummating a required marriage to his late older brother's widow.  In the story, God apparently strikes him dead.  Not for masturbating, but for not fulfilling the obligation he had as the surviving younger brother.

I hope this post is not taken as a 'religious' post - that is not my intention at all.  It's meant to be a historical explanation about why western society has traditionally been uncomfortable with self-pleasure.

And it also probably explains why nobody ever names their son Onan. 

 

What about Onan O'Brien, he did a great job with the Oscars.  

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

On 3/7/2025 at 8:51 AM, soloyo215 said:

In the USA, it's part of the puritan and christian heritages. It's more tolerable to kill than to masturbate

Since you brought it up, let's remember that nearly half the country are one-issur voters that prioritizes the opposite: not killing.  And it's probably the ones with Christian heritage that are more likely to prioritize that.  I'm not advocating one position or the other; but, I couldn't let this comment slide without some fact checking.  Maybe you meant to say "More tolerable to kill those found guilty of a crime", because that would be an accurate assessment of puritan heritage. 

I think the women's sexual revolution, the AIDS epidemic, and child predator awareness all made men's masturbation even more taboo.

[soloyo215]

4 minutes ago, Vegas_Millennial said:

Since you brought it up, let's remember that nearly half the country are one-issur voters that prioritizes the opposite: not killing.  And it's probably the ones with Christian heritage that are more likely to prioritize that.  I'm not advocating one position or the other; but, I couldn't let this comment slide without some fact checking.  Maybe you meant to say "More tolerable to kill those found guilty of a crime", because that would be an accurate assessment of puritan heritage. 

I think the women's sexual revolution, the AIDS epidemic, and child predator awareness all made men's masturbation even more taboo.

True, but even that almost half the country alsohave very conservative views around sex and sexual expression. Let's not forget that either.

[+ purplekow]

Let's not wonder into a political discussion.  Let's stick to real masturbation instead of internet mental masturbation.  

By the way, I believe we have had jerk off counts before and while five seems like a nice number, it really depends on your age and general well being.  If I can get myself off twice before getting out of bed one day, I am good for awhile.  Meanwhile, in my younger days, 35 years ago in my 30's, even if I had had sex with a partner, a nice jerk off to sleep was a part of my nightly regimen.  I did not always reach orgasm but the warm touch of my hand did help lull me to sleep and most times it ended with me falling asleep right after an orgasm.  

Edited March 8 by purplekow

[Guest]

1 hour ago, purplekow said:

Let's not wonder into a political discussion.  Let's stick to real masturbation instead of internet mental masturbation.  

I was wondering!

I started this thread to talk about the beautiful pleasures of masturbation and an encouragement for more to be comfortable with its practice.

😂😘🤤

I think I'll go and stroke right now, in fact. 💦

[+ Vegas_Millennial]

I remember hearing/reading that masturbation is part of a healthy "sex pyramid", similar to the "food pyramid".

When you're single, solo masturbation makes up the base of the pyramid and is the foundation of your sex life.  It's healthy to occasionally focus on the other parts of the sex pyramid and have some sex with dates, hookups, friends, other couples, and mutual masturbation.

When you're in a relationship and living together, the "sex pyramid" likely inverts (turns up-side-down).  Now, solo masturbation should probably be the peak of the pyramid.  It's a much smaller part of your sex life, but still a part.  Sex with your partner likely makes up the base of the pyramid; and, the middle of the pyramid is mutual masturbation and group sex and sex with other people, etc.

Edited March 9 by Vegas_Millennial
Added semicolon

[CuriousByNature]

59 minutes ago, Vegas_Millennial said:

I remember hearing/reading that masturbation is part of a healthy "sex pyramid", similar to the "food pyramid".

When you're single, solo masturbation makes up the base of the pyramid and is the foundation of your sex life.  It's healthy to occasionally focus on the other parts of the sex pyramid and have some sex with dates, hookups, friends, other couples, and mutual masturbation.

When you're in a relationship and living together, the "sex pyramid" likely inverts (turns up-side-down).  Now, solo masturbation should probably be the peak of the pyramid.  It's a much smaller part of your sex life, but still a part.  Sex with your partner likely makes up the base of the pyramid; and, the middle of the pyramid is mutual masturbation and group sex and sex with other people, etc.

So I guess that means I have a 'sex parking lot'.

[56harrisond]

College 101

[+ Charlie]

I was the shy only child of older than normal parents, who never talked about sex (at least, not in front of me), so I never heard anything about masturbation--not even the term--when I was growing up. I noticed around puberty that my cock would get hard when I heard about certain things or saw certain pictures of men, and I found that when I held it, it felt even better, and then one day while I was holding it and slightly stroking it, I suddenly ejaculated. From then on I held it and stroked it to climax often, but never when there was anyone else around, because I knew that anything involving my genitals was something that for some reason wasn't polite to even talk about, even with male friends my age. It wasn't until I had my first sexual experience with a guy when I was 17--he was in his early 20s and had picked me up in a public men's room--that I discussed masturbation with anyone, and realized that it was OK to jerk off, but only if there was no one to jerk me off or blow me; in a half century of sex with other males, I don't remember ever jerking off in front of someone else. Since I wanted to cum much more often than when I was engaging in sex with someone else, my hand became my secret best friend for life.

[+ purplekow]

I first masturbated to orgasm inadvertently, as been told by several posters here.  I had starting getting erections and decided to get a ruler to measure it.  As it grew larger I began to bear down to try and move the needle upward.  I continued to bear down on and off with incremental increase in the measurement.  I found that I just wanted to continue that bearing down even though there was no longer any increase in size.  I began bearing down faster and firmer and was near exhaustion when much to my shock, a shower of fluid came shooting out of me.  I was not expecting that and almost immediately the desire to bear down stopped.  

Later, I went to the library and started looking at sex education books in the medical section.  I learned the term masturbation and also orgasm and it has been mastrubation and orgasm on an off ever since.    I can no longer bring myself to orgasm hands free however.  

I other technique I used was alternating warm and cold water from the bath faucet on my erect penis. The brought me near an orgasm and a stroke or two ended the urge with a splurge.  

[+ Lucky]

It's so odd to me that my reliigon made me feel strongly that I should not masturbate, yet colleagues of the people telling me this were abusing boys to an enormous extent. None of those guys ever came on to me, not in the slightest.

[+ Just Chuck]

May is International Masturbation Month.

 

Now, get out there and do your part!

[CuriousByNature]

12 hours ago, Just Chuck said:

May is International Masturbation Month.

 

Now, get out there and do your part!

A different way to erect the maypole?