Rates on the Rise??

[ShortCutie7]

5 hours ago, Simon Suraci said:

Nothing wrong with asking for info not listed on the ads, even from a dozen providers at once. As long as there’s not a lot of back and forth wanting free random conversations or sexting behavior, or “negotiating” behavior, I have no problem responding to inquiries. It means someone is considering hiring me and I want that. Be direct, ask for specific things and you’re good. Maybe you hire me tomorrow, maybe you hire me next year. Maybe never. That’s fine. Just respect the provider’s time as best you can, and you’re golden.

Exactly, I have neither made an effort to negotiate nor engaged in any back-and-forth beyond “thanks, I’ll be in touch when I have a better idea of when I can see you”.

4 hours ago, SouthOfTheBorder said:

a word of advice since you’re new - if you’re reaching out months in advance to multiple providers , that’s wasting their time and it’s not polite.  
while there are no hard rules, a week would really be the most I’d reach out & then only if I’m visiting a city where a provider is located.  If in my city, then 3-4 days advance max.  
Providers are inundated with inquiries where there is zero chance it happens.  Dont be one of those people.  You will be appreciated that much more when providers know you are serious & follow through. 
 

Thanks, that is very helpful advice and something I would have never thought of. And as @Jarrod_Uncut mentioned, it didn’t occur to me that the rate could change, or for that matter that the provider could move, etc.
 

[cany10011]

On 2/6/2024 at 1:57 PM, arnemgreeves said:

In my country, rates have beenthe same in a long time. literally 20 years or more. this is accounting for a lot of economic happenings. Then again, charging 150 an hour, and seeing maybe 5-10 clients a week is more than enough to live on. 

Are you in Germany? My favorite Berlin guy charges $600 overnight, which is the same hourly rate as my favorite NYC guy. 

Edited February 8 by cany10011

[ShortCutie7]

1 hour ago, jmichaeliii said:

I prefer providers that are OK with booking in advance..sometimes up to a month or more.  It's hard with my job to do it any other way and I make it a priority for these appointments.  I have 3 guys in my area I see and I am lucky they are all excellent and easy to work with.

My kind of guy!  I now have an appointment to see my first provider next Friday 😍

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

3 hours ago, Simon Suraci said:

Say things escalate and you quote someone 150% of what you normally would, that word could get around: “he quoted me $XXX. Can you believe that guy? What a prima donna!” …when in reality the client is the problem and his behavior is reason he’s getting an inflated rate, but he won’t see it that way and blame you and may even trash talk you to others. 

Oh, I've been around this long enough to hear it all and get called every unsavory name in the book. Very publically, actually... For years. 

Over time, I've learned to stop giving a shit about what strangers say.

My motto remains: I don't care if you don't like me... I love myself enough for the both of us.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

3 hours ago, mike carey said:

*Counts number of times contacting Benjamin*

*Gulp!*

*I guess I haven't talked about rates, more often about fares*

We talk shop. 

That's the kind of stuff I love. 

Keep emailing 😀

[Guest]

Curious, I recently spent some time on Seeking. The time/energy of it all…no thanks. Will happily pay a premium to avoid all that.

I’m in the professional services industry. I learned early in my career to know my worth and to never negotiate my rate. Has worked out well.

[+ Pensant]

Got a hilarious response yesterday from a non-binary provider who I thought would be a nice diversion. $700/hour plus Uber. I went for a run and let the initial desire lapse!

[GenerousGent]

Everybody charges whatever they can get away with.  Basically sites like OF and JFF have liberated organized sex workers.  They have steady streams of income and can pick and choose if they even want to do "in person" sex work anymore. 

Gay men, generally speaking, have a lot of discretionary income.  The boys know it and charge accordingly.  If a guy is hot for you, you have to strike in the initial moment.  I'd have totally become a sex worker in my youth if I had the resources available to me that exist now. 

Trust and believe also, the more a queen can/will pay, the more obnoxious and demanding they probably are.  So per usual in the gay "community" the pretty boys are all fucking each other and loving it and the rich gays get the cream of the crop. 

Work a day fellas are basically just out of the online gay hiring game now, except for the random street meat you can still find on the ground occasionally.  BUT, not every guy can demand $300 and up and make any money.  And there are only so many rich guys tricking at any given time.  Many are in steady sugar relationships.  I'm definitely always looking for the humble, discreet, more rural provider who likes the game and depends more on volume than anything else. 

Fuck LA and NYC, both are just out of control and ridiculous, lol.  LIfe is much better in the hinterlands.  I'd rather put up with a little cold weather a couple months a year and an affordable cost of living year round than deal with the level of narcissism those environments encourage and allow any day.  Also, thank goodness I'm old and my sex drive died so I'm rarely even looking any more.

[ShortCutie7]

Came back to this thread to let you all know that I had my first ever meeting with a provider this morning and it was absolutely worth the $360 I spent!  I won’t (financially or time-wise) be able to do this regularly, but I had no reason to worry and left very happy.  That said, we didn’t get to do everything I had intended- the guy really followed my lead.  

[mango]

Just had to share - I was looking for a cam show instead of an in person hire recently. Had a guy quote £750 (~$950) for a 20 min non-nude cam.

It was either a "shut up and go away" number or he genuinely can get that because of his OF. Either way, even if I was loaded and rich, I would probably steer away from that. 

[Rod Hagen]

On 2/9/2024 at 8:21 AM, GenerousGent said:

Fuck LA and NYC, both are just out of control and ridiculous, lol.  LIfe is much better in the hinterlands.  I'd rather put up with a little cold weather a couple months a year and an affordable cost of living year round than deal with the level of narcissism those environments encourage and allow any day.  

You can find rent-stabilized units in desirable parts of LA.  It takes work, but it's doable.  Also, we have the ocean and mountains and lots of cheap Asian and Latin food, and with Vito's and Joe's and Prince Street the pizza is as good as NYC, and I know where of I speak. Ice cream is expensive, but really, except for Rite Aid, ice cream in a cone is expensive everywhere now.

Edited March 8 by Rod Hagen

[Jamie21]

On 2/8/2024 at 1:23 AM, jmichaeliii said:

I prefer providers that are OK with booking in advance..sometimes up to a month or more. 

I’ve currently got a client booked in for end of June…and it was booked a month ago. He plans ahead! 

[+ JamesB]

25 minutes ago, Jamie21 said:

I’ve currently got a client booked in for end of June…and it was booked a month ago. He plans ahead! 

Out of sheer curiosity, what percentage of bookings made months in advance typically experience alterations or cancellations?

[+ DrownedBoy]

1 hour ago, Rod Hagen said:

 lots of cheap Asian and Latin 

Oh...you meant the food....

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

On 2/9/2024 at 10:21 AM, GenerousGent said:

Fuck LA and NYC, both are just out of control and ridiculous, lol.  LIfe is much better in the hinterlands.  I'd rather put up with a little cold weather a couple months a year and an affordable cost of living year round than deal with the level of narcissism those environments encourage and allow any day.  Also, thank goodness I'm old and my sex drive died so I'm rarely even looking any more.

'Siri, define chip-on-your-shoulder'

NYC and LA are both great cities if you don't have a sharp stick in your ass about them.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

8 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

I’ve currently got a client booked in for end of June…and it was booked a month ago. He plans ahead! 

Advance clients are the absolute best 👍

[Jarrod_Uncut]

On 2/9/2024 at 10:21 AM, GenerousGent said:

Everybody charges whatever they can get away with.  Basically sites like OF and JFF have liberated organized sex workers.  They have steady streams of income and can pick and choose if they even want to do "in person" sex work anymore. 

Gay men, generally speaking, have a lot of discretionary income.  The boys know it and charge accordingly.  If a guy is hot for you, you have to strike in the initial moment.  I'd have totally become a sex worker in my youth if I had the resources available to me that exist now. 

Trust and believe also, the more a queen can/will pay, the more obnoxious and demanding they probably are.  So per usual in the gay "community" the pretty boys are all fucking each other and loving it and the rich gays get the cream of the crop. 

Work a day fellas are basically just out of the online gay hiring game now, except for the random street meat you can still find on the ground occasionally.  BUT, not every guy can demand $300 and up and make any money.  And there are only so many rich guys tricking at any given time.  Many are in steady sugar relationships.  I'm definitely always looking for the humble, discreet, more rural provider who likes the game and depends more on volume than anything else. 

Fuck LA and NYC, both are just out of control and ridiculous, lol.  LIfe is much better in the hinterlands.  I'd rather put up with a little cold weather a couple months a year and an affordable cost of living year round than deal with the level of narcissism those environments encourage and allow any day.  Also, thank goodness I'm old and my sex drive died so I'm rarely even looking any more.

This is all relevant however, even outside of LA and New York, some of the same scenarios are playing out. I notice for example in the Midwest: many ethnic/minorities tend to marry/get involved with White guys who have money instead of escort. I notice it a lot.
 

As for gay guys with discretionary income: meh. The problem is, many of those don’t want to spend it on sex. Many will play like they don’t have money to give, but then turn around and spend thousands on trips and other things with friends. I’ve said it elsewhere here, but I’ve started to realize selling *** is hard. Not because they don’t want me, but because getting the rate I want…And at a time that is convenient for both. 

Regardless, I’m looking for alternatives to the big cities. I don’t want a rural town necessarily because, that’s the position I’m in now and NOBODY wants to pay for it out here. I’m always having to commute to the city. But they always want same day/short notice meets, and I can’t work like that everyday.

[Jamie21]

10 hours ago, JamesB said:

Out of sheer curiosity, what percentage of bookings made months in advance typically experience alterations or cancellations?

Very few. Because they’re made with intent. If you plan something that far in advance you really mean it. Often they’re clients who are visiting London, they plan their itinerary and they want to know I’ll be available, hence booking the session then. If they left it to short notice then I might be busy. Occasionally someone who booked months in advance might change the day or time but that will also be done with a lot of notice.

I find the bookings that happen on the day (as in “hey are you available this afternoon around 3?”) are much more likely to flake or mess around on timing because they’ve booked on a whim. 

 

 

[Rod Hagen]

10 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

I find the bookings that happen on the day (as in “hey are you available this afternoon around 3?”) are much more likely to flake or mess around on timing because they’ve booked on a whim. 

 

 

That's true.  Additionally, in my experience those people who schedule weeks or months (rare) out, are also friends so if something comes up on either end, as it were :-), it's fine.  And, also, we make each other a priority.

As Susan Sontag said to Michael Silverblatt the day they met: "WE ARE FRIENDS.  We've wasted too much time already.  I will make time available to see you when you visit New York, just as you will make time to see me when I visit LA."  Now that's definitive!

[Rod Hagen]

14 hours ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

'Siri, define chip-on-your-shoulder'

NYC and LA are both great cities if you don't have a sharp stick in your ass about them.

No, I get it.  Zum beispsiel, I've entirely fallen, largely, out of love with NYC, a place I once felt was ideal.  Opinions change, feelings sour...and fester...and ooze...and pop :-)  

p.s. I love "sharp stick" not just stick.  Nicely done.

p.p.s. I don't know what is up with my off-topic stuff the last couple days.  Sorry about that.  Back to the certified-fresh topic of rising rates :-)

Edited March 9 by Rod Hagen

[marylander1940]

On 2/7/2024 at 9:28 PM, cany10011 said:

Are you in Germany? My favorite Berlin guy charges $600 overnight, which is the same hourly rate as my favorite NYC guy. 

When something is legal is usually cheaper.

[marylander1940]

On 3/8/2024 at 4:41 PM, JamesB said:

Out of sheer curiosity, what percentage of bookings made months in advance typically experience alterations or cancellations?

Many friends who escort tell me that unless it's an overnight or a trip most guys who book days ahead tend to cancel or go unresponsive.

 

[marylander1940]

On 2/9/2024 at 9:18 AM, Pensant said:

Got a hilarious response yesterday from a non-binary provider who I thought would be a nice diversion. $700/hour plus Uber. I went for a run and let the initial desire lapse!

[Simon Suraci]

1 hour ago, marylander1940 said:

Many friends who escort tell me that unless it's an overnight or a trip most guys who book days ahead tend to cancel or go unresponsive.

 

Not true for me. Maybe with new clients moreso, but even then most of mine show up.

[jmichaeliii]

8 minutes ago, Simon Suraci said:

Not true for me. Maybe with new clients moreso, but even then most of mine show up.

Because of work schedules I prefer booking ahead so I know I have time blocked for this.  Some providers will do it, others not.  My anchor guys will so I tend to stick with them most of the time.