35 - and feeling so worn out.

[JayCeeKy]

I have little hair left on my head

But in your picture you've got a full head of hair.

 

Concerning the OP, it sounds to me like maybe you've got a low-grade depression. People often over-eat when they are depressed and lack motivation. Depressed folks 1)feel like there's very little good about their lives; 2)feel like the future is pretty hopeless; 3)the problem is ME, not my circumstances. Along with @Monarchy79 (and others) excellent advice, I would encourage you to see a therapist to help you identify your feelings, process them, and MOST IMPORTANTLY, set some goals (and SPECIFIC STEPS to achieve them). Therapy is not meant to be "rent-a-friend" - it's about CHANGE - what do you need to change to make your life more enjoyable (it could be a change of thinking about yourself, change in your daily routines, change in who you hang out with). Set SMART goals (specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, time-limited). From your posts, I am sure you have the intelligence to make changes, I suspect you just need a professional to help you get going. Bon chance.

 

To help you find a therapist in your area, this list might be helpful.

 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists

[Merboy]

Thanks to all of you for the advice! I definitely will re-read all of the comments and make changes to improve things!!! ?

[marylander1940]

Thanks to all of you for the advice! I definitely will re-read all of the comments and make changes to improve things!!! ?

 

Keep us posted about your road map to recovery!

 

Scheduling an appointment with a Dr. should be the first thing you do as suggested by many including me.

[dbar123]

Thirty five is still so young. Get off your ass and lose weight while you are still young enough to enjoy it.

 

When I turned 55 I was at my peak weight of 240 and my bloodwork went to shit...high glucose and high cholesterol etc. It has taken me the last 10 years to gradually get down to 170 but it was worth it. I feel better at 66 than I ever did at 35.

 

Try intermittent fasting and do some bike riding or walking (I do at least 75min/day). You won’t make anything happen without getting done exercise and doing a little weightlifting.

 

Good luck

[jjkrkwood]

I have been unhappy with my looks for years. When I look in the mirror, i dont think I look that bad for my age (70 on Oct 29th), BUT when I see myself in photos or on Zoom, I'm horrified. My face is drooping and sagging, and looks like its melting...

 

And also, for years I've had a "pooch", and no diet or excercise gets rid of it, although if I lose weight, it goes away everywhere BUT in my belly....

 

So, today I had a consultation with a highly recommended plastic surgeon at NYU Langone about full face, eye and neck lift, AND liposuction of the belly and flanks.....He happens to be the chairman of the department there, as well as a pioneer of the very first FULL face "transplant".....

 

Now, its just a matter of deciding whether I should allow myself to spend $97,000 at my age 70, or just try to live with myself as the few years I might have left ???

 

Now @samhexum , that's a REAL dilemma ! ???

[+ FrankR]

I have been unhappy with my looks for years. When I look in the mirror, i dont think I look that bad for my age (70 on Oct 29th), BUT when I see myself in photos or on Zoom, I'm horrified. My face is drooping and sagging, and looks like its melting...

 

And also, for years I've had a "pooch", and no diet or excercise gets rid of it, although if I lose weight, it goes away everywhere BUT in my belly....

 

So, today I had a consultation with a highly recommended plastic surgeon at NYU Langone about full face, eye and neck lift, AND liposuction of the belly and flanks.....He happens to be the chairman of the department there, as well as a pioneer of the very first FULL face "transplant".....

 

Now, its just a matter of deciding whether I should allow myself to spend $97,000 at my age 70, or just try to live with myself as the few years I might have left ???

 

Now @samhexum , that's a REAL dilemma ! ???

You can't take your earthly possessions with you when you die. If you have the money to spare an want to do it, I say go for it. You are not "spending" it, you are "investing" it in your own wellness. I am sure some will look down on your choice, but that is my 2c!

 

Edited January 14, 2021 by FrankR

[+ sync]

I have been unhappy with my looks for years. When I look in the mirror, i dont think I look that bad for my age (70 on Oct 29th), BUT when I see myself in photos or on Zoom, I'm horrified. My face is drooping and sagging, and looks like its melting...

 

And also, for years I've had a "pooch", and no diet or excercise gets rid of it, although if I lose weight, it goes away everywhere BUT in my belly....

 

So, today I had a consultation with a highly recommended plastic surgeon at NYU Langone about full face, eye and neck lift, AND liposuction of the belly and flanks.....He happens to be the chairman of the department there, as well as a pioneer of the very first FULL face "transplant".....

 

Now, its just a matter of deciding whether I should allow myself to spend $97,000 at my age 70, or just try to live with myself as the few years I might have left ???

 

Now @samhexum , that's a REAL dilemma ! ???

It's subjective. If I was sitting on $97 grand of discretionary funds, that alone would lift my face. ?

[Luv2play]

I have been unhappy with my looks for years. When I look in the mirror, i dont think I look that bad for my age (70 on Oct 29th), BUT when I see myself in photos or on Zoom, I'm horrified. My face is drooping and sagging, and looks like its melting...

 

And also, for years I've had a "pooch", and no diet or excercise gets rid of it, although if I lose weight, it goes away everywhere BUT in my belly....

 

So, today I had a consultation with a highly recommended plastic surgeon at NYU Langone about full face, eye and neck lift, AND liposuction of the belly and flanks.....He happens to be the chairman of the department there, as well as a pioneer of the very first FULL face "transplant".....

 

Now, its just a matter of deciding whether I should allow myself to spend $97,000 at my age 70, or just try to live with myself as the few years I might have left ???

 

Now @samhexum , that's a REAL dilemma ! ???

I would try less drastic options than the full retrofit the doctor is proposing. A lady in Montreal about 15 years ago who owned a cosmetics company with her husband did exactly that at the age of 54 I think and died on the operating table. Her heart couldn’t take the strain of the hours long operation.

 

And the same happened to another person, a man who coincidentally owned a cosmetics firm, was only in his 40s I think when he died as a result of a body makeover by surgery. Both of these people were multi millionaires and really didn’t have serious problems with their looks. Perhaps their occupations made them susceptible to wanting access to the fountain of youth.

[CuriousByNature]

I would try less drastic options than the full retrofit the doctor is proposing. A lady in Montreal about 15 years ago who owned a cosmetics company with her husband did exactly that at the age of 54 I think and died on the operating table. Her heart couldn’t take the strain of the hours long operation.

 

And the same happened to another person, a man who coincidentally owned a cosmetics firm, was only in his 40s I think when he died as a result of a body makeover by surgery. Both of these people were multi millionaires and really didn’t have serious problems with their looks. Perhaps their occupations made them susceptible to wanting access to the fountain of youth.

I'm concerned about losing weight and the effect on skin sag. I am trying to lose slowly and steadily to allow my aged skin to contract slowly, but I expect i will have a lot that wont snap back to shape. I have no problem taking the risk for surgery but also dont want to be taken for a ride. Im expecting it will only be needed in my abdomen, because my face, arms and legs dont tend to be where my fat settles in. I really want to see if I can find at least one ab again.

[CuriousByNature]

Aging disgracefully is (mostly) a choice people make. It's years of bad decisions, regrets, what-ifs and I-shouldas.

 

Stop the cycle now while you're still young enough to make seismic changes.

 

Like I tell a lot of other escorts and guys in porn, live for tomorrow, not just moment to moment.

Very impressive profile picture.

[Guest]

I have been unhappy with my looks for years. When I look in the mirror, i dont think I look that bad for my age (70 on Oct 29th), BUT when I see myself in photos or on Zoom, I'm horrified. My face is drooping and sagging, and looks like its melting...

...

Now, its just a matter of deciding whether I should allow myself to spend $97,000 at my age 70....

Yikes! You're making me think of that scene from Raiders of the Lost Ark...

 

Dude, with 100K, you can hire yourself some pretty hot escorts and have a super good time. Ask yourself what the surgery would be buying you.

[samhexum]

Now, its just a matter of deciding whether I should allow myself to spend $97,000 at my age 70, or just try to live with myself as the few years I might have left ???

 

That's over 100,00 White Castles you couldn't buy.

[+ Autumnal]

There are few truer sayings than "You are what you eat". IMHO the quality of the food you eat is more important than the quantity - if you eat and drink junk foods your body will be a mess. Eat healthy food and your body will thank you!

[Guest]

Of course the original post on this string reminded me of this scene from Blazing Saddles....

[jjkrkwood]

I'm concerned about losing weight and the effect on skin sag. I am trying to lose slowly and steadily to allow my aged skin to contract slowly, but I expect i will have a lot that wont snap back to shape. I have no problem taking the risk for surgery but also dont want to be taken for a ride. Im expecting it will only be needed in my abdomen, because my face, arms and legs dont tend to be where my fat settles in. I really want to see if I can find at least one ab again.

 

I did also specifically ask the doctors about weight loss... I have been a dieter ALL my life in a quest to keep my weight down, and have maintained relatively stable weight, more or less 10-15 lbs up or down AFTER losing a ton of weight in my early 20's, starting to lift weights then and eat right (except for a White Castle or KFC splurge now and then)....... He DID say that IF I lost a significant amount of weight AFTER the makeover, I might be a bit "saggy" in the face, AND the lipo would surely result in some "slightly" saggy skin as at my age, skin elasticity is minimized. That's the only thing that gave me "pause"..... since I have NO saggy skin now, and I thought "so I really want to spend 97K and come out with a "shar pei" body, and THEN need a tummy tuck to fix that ? I mean at 70, how many more years do I really have ???? I should have done this 20 years ago, BUT NOW ?????

The one upside is that they do "send you home" with a nurse escort for overnight care... and I thought hmmmmm, maybe I'll get a hot MALE nurse to spend the night ? But then I came back down to reality and realized i'll be bandaged up like a mummy and in pain. WTF will I be able to do with HIM anyway ? ?

[+ keroscenefire]

I'm 35 as well and definitely feel similarly. It's hard getting old. One small thing I do is really try to get exercise every single day even if it's just a short walk. It really does help improve almost every other part: Increases energy, allows you to sleep better, helps digest food.

 

But I definitely feel similarly about the mid-30s. We still got a lot of life to live though so don't feel too down.

[samhexum]

But then I came back down to reality and realized i'll be bandaged up like a mummy and in pain. WTF will I be able to do with HIM anyway ? ?

Ever read Johnny Got His Gun?

 

 

I'm 35 as well and definitely feel similarly. It's hard getting old.

 

 

[+ Pensant]

@Merboy Aren’t you glad you joined the forum!

[Luv2play]

I did also specifically ask the doctors about weight loss... I have been a dieter ALL my life in a quest to keep my weight down, and have maintained relatively stable weight, more or less 10-15 lbs up or down AFTER losing a ton of weight in my early 20's, starting to lift weights then and eat right (except for a White Castle or KFC splurge now and then)....... He DID say that IF I lost a significant amount of weight AFTER the makeover, I might be a bit "saggy" in the face, AND the lipo would surely result in some "slightly" saggy skin as at my age, skin elasticity is minimized. That's the only thing that gave me "pause"..... since I have NO saggy skin now, and I thought "so I really want to spend 97K and come out with a "shar pei" body, and THEN need a tummy tuck to fix that ? I mean at 70, how many more years do I really have ???? I should have done this 20 years ago, BUT NOW ?????

The one upside is that they do "send you home" with a nurse escort for overnight care... and I thought hmmmmm, maybe I'll get a hot MALE nurse to spend the night ? But then I came back down to reality and realized i'll be bandaged up like a mummy and in pain. WTF will I be able to do with HIM anyway ? ?

[/quoteHer

I made an error in giving the example of a lady who died having extensive liposuction surgery in a single day. Her name was Micheline Charest and she was the co-founder of Cinar, the film company that made popular animations such as Arthur for children. She was 51 and in good health when she underwent the procedure in 2004.

 

If you search her name on the Internet, there is extensive coverage of her death.

[Rudynate]

In the late 20s and early 30s, I saw unbelievable aging happen to me. I remember when I was 27 and looked at the mirror after a hard day and never saw myself look so old. Now I'm in mid-30s and I look unbearably bad. I gained 130 pounds within the past decade, going from 140 to 270, and the weight has not gone down.

 

At 25, I had faith I'd meet a man one day. Today, I am under no delusions anymore and realize there is no such thing as a "perfect romance."

 

I decided to hire in my late 20s as my body was worn down because I saw the clock ticking. I was one of the last holdouts out of anyone I knew when it came to intimacy. There simply was no intimacy until I began to hire. Hiring offered a rare opportunity to meet guys I knew I could not get to look at me twice out on the street.

 

Now at 35, I'm looking more for a really handsome companion - a weekend, dinner, and conversation. My general feelings about sex are undergoing dramatic change - I guess I'm getting older and beginning to lose interest in just the physical bodies of men.

 

I find 35 a hard age. You're not young anymore and you're not that old either. They keep saying "40 is the new 30" and all that stuff but I think for the past decade we've seen people desperately try to hold onto their youth. I'd rather just age... gracefully if possible, but I know it's coming and I know youth is long-gone.

 

I just wanted to share that with y'all and also ask you about your age and how you feel about it. Do you have any regrets or bitterness about the choices you've made in life? Do you struggle with aging at all? Are you secretly longing to be "young" again?

 

When I was your age, I remember thinking that the fun part of life was over, and it was all going to be downhill from there. I was too heavy, I smoked, I had an abusive boyfriend, I was dissatisfied and disappointed that I hadn't accomplished more at my age and I was stuck in a rut that I couldn't seem to get my self out of. At the time, my father's health was failing and I picked up and moved across country back home to help him out.

 

It was the best thing that ever happened to me. We came from an industrial city in the the Northeast with a large blue-collar population and everybody worked - there wasn't any tolerance of somebody who didn't work full-time. In moving back there I rediscovered my work ethic and got a job and stayed on it. I stayed there for almost two years. When my father died, I realized I had one of those openings in life where I was free to do whatever I wanted. I was 37. Friends in San Francisco had been urging me to move there, and I thought, "Why not?" I loaded my car up and hit the road for California. That was 31 years ago.

 

The last 31 years have been a whirlwind - I don't know where the energy comes from. I have owned two properties, I have gotten two professional degrees, I have spent my entire career working with tech companies in Silicon Valley, I have my own business, I'm respected in my profession. I met the love of my life and we've been together for 29 years, and I am a competitor in masters' bodybuilding. It hasn't been all roses - I have a couple of semi-serious health conditions that I have to be mindful off. Between age 50 and 60, I was hospitalized four times. I barely squeaked through the financial collapse and now the present sorry state of affairs.

 

My whole point in telling this story, is that it's not too late for you. You have a lot of life left in you. Start now.

[+ Charlie]

Ever read Johnny Got His Gun?

Yes. Everyone should read it.

[+ Charlie]

I have been unhappy with my looks for years. When I look in the mirror, i dont think I look that bad for my age (70 on Oct 29th), BUT when I see myself in photos or on Zoom, I'm horrified. My face is drooping and sagging, and looks like its melting...

 

And also, for years I've had a "pooch", and no diet or excercise gets rid of it, although if I lose weight, it goes away everywhere BUT in my belly....

 

So, today I had a consultation with a highly recommended plastic surgeon at NYU Langone about full face, eye and neck lift, AND liposuction of the belly and flanks.....He happens to be the chairman of the department there, as well as a pioneer of the very first FULL face "transplant".....

 

Now, its just a matter of deciding whether I should allow myself to spend $97,000 at my age 70, or just try to live with myself as the few years I might have left ???

 

Now @samhexum , that's a REAL dilemma ! ???

With $97K, think how many hot escorts you could hire to tell you how much you turn them on.

[jjkrkwood]

With $97K, think how many hot escorts you could hire to tell you how much you turn them on.

 

[+ Lucky]

Okay, young'uns, I will tell you from my experience that after years of fighting the skin sagging, paying for Botox and moisturizers, I finally reached the point where I just don't care anymore. It's kind of like fighting your gayness when young, once you just accept it life gets much better! Now isn't that a wrinkle?

[jjkrkwood]

Okay, young'uns, I will tell you from my experience that after years of fighting the skin sagging, paying for Botox and moisturizers, I finally reached the point where I just don't care anymore. It's kind of like fighting your gayness when young, once you just accept it life gets much better! Now isn't that a wrinkle?