samhexum

we have a topic in this forum for that story.

I think I found your female counterpart: I’m too hot to date but don’t call me arrogant — haters are just jealous and insecure

I’m the ‘Girthmasterr’ — my massive penis earns me $80K a month on OnlyFans He’s getting to the meat of the matter — and it’s a fleshy feast for the eyes. Sex work hadn’t been a lifelong dream job for this redheaded millennial from Brisbane, Australia. But now, at age 30, the Down Under wonder — who’s anointed himself the “Girthmasterr,” owing to his 8-inch-long, 7-inch circumference penis — is totally in the thick of it. I’m an OnlyFans content creator,” bragged the well-endowed digital dynamo in a trending street interview with employment app @Getahead. “I’m in the top .1% of earners on the platform worldwide,” he claimed in the clip, which has beckoned more than 4.5 million views on TikTok alone. “[I earn] between $40,000 to $80,000 a month.” But since starring in the eye-popping vid, Girthmasterr’s star has, well, grown bigger and bigger. “I’m going viral on Twitter right now,” he said Tuesday in a post shared to his social media account, with which he’s popularized the hashtag #GirthTok. “It has millions of views and bookmarks … it’s blown up pretty quick.” And that it has. Drawing the attention of more than 99 million X users — including a seemingly stunned Cardi B, who tweeted then deleted her shocked reaction to Girth’s goodies — his “random” interview with the Getahead rep has sent cyber freaks searching for sights of his sizeable snake. “It’s been a crazy 24 hours,” the Girthmasterr told Rolling Stone before revealing that his NSWF nickname was inspired by the KitchenAid Mix Master — you know, the appliance granny uses to bake homemade cookies and cakes. “Funnily enough, that name actually does mean a lot of favors in marketing, because it really stands out,” he said. “People see it and they kind of want to investigate to see if I can actually live up to the claim or not.” And, boy, does he. Since becoming a full-time porn performer in 2023, working himself to the bone 80 hours a week, the cash flow has turned into a full-on flood. In fact, he’s earned upwards of $40,000 in just the last 30 days, per screenshots obtained by RollingStone. But he explained that the most difficult aspect of his saucy success was coming clean to his mom and sisters. “We grew up pretty poor, and one of my sisters said, ‘I’ll be many things, but I’ll never be poor,’” recalled Girthmasterr. “So I took her out for dinner. I said, ‘Remember that time you told me you’ll be many things, but you’ll never be poor? Well, now I’m making porn on the internet. And I’m not going to be poor.’” Luckily, his family and friends have been “very cool” about his dirty work. “Men get so excited when they find out what I do,” he revealed. “They shake my hand. I’m kind of the envy of my friends.” In fact, Girthmasterr claimed that most of his fans are other men. However, he believes the vast majority of the crowd doesn’t identify as gay — a side of erotica he’s hesitating to explore. “I only want to create things that I enjoy and that I kind of have a vision for,” said the virile VIP. “I kind of feel like [if I shot gay content], I’d be ripping [gay fans] off. It would kind of be a cash grab in a sense. “I just wouldn’t feel ethical.” And he, too, hopes that the world will one day see past his jumbo Johnson. “I try not to fall into the trap of making my penis my entire personality,” he said, adding that he’s exploring new hobbies like sailing and piloting in his free time. “There’s only so much penis talk that the regular people in my life can handle before they get sick of me,” said Girthmasterr. “I try to keep myself interesting enough in other aspects [so] that if people do like me, they could like me for more than my penis.” If I had a nickel for each time I'd said that, I'd be flat broke.

Comedy ran in the family. Her twin brother, Nipsey, was a hoot.

I finished the initial package and bought another. I find it bitter on its own, but have added it to wraps and re-heated pot roast and soup, and have found that the flavor gets easily hidden so I can add a bit of healthiness to my meals here and there.

Dog recovering after Queens teen shoots canine while playing with guns that's ruff...

I do, but when the experts at Stouffer's recommend a little extra time, I tend to believe them.

what difference does a little extra cooking time really make? KEEP FIRE EXTINGUISHER NEARBY.

my god-daughter took dance lessons on that block 20 years ago. Middle Village Bagels claims the throne as best bagel spot in Queens Looking for the best bagel spot in Queens? Look no further. Middle Village Bagels, located at 79-16 Eliot Ave., has been crowned the best bagel spot in Queens. The Queens Chamber of Commerce named Middle Village Bagels the best spot for bagels in the borough on Feb. 9, after reviewing 55 nominations and tallying over 3,000 votes over several weeks.

CREDIT WHERE CREDIT IS DUE...

Dear Abby: I’ve been married to my husband for 40 (long) years. Whenever I do something wrong, I get a note on the kitchen counter. This has gone on for years and years. This is the note I woke up to this morning. “Why did you leave the light on in the garage? To burn it out to see what I would do? I will do nothing except go to the garage in daylight.” He always makes it seem like I purposely do things. I’m tired of being treated like this. What is his problem? — Notes in the East Dear Notes: I will assume you have addressed this directly with your husband. For whatever reason, he is hesitant to communicate with you face-to-face, which is why he resorts to notes on the kitchen counter. Instead of openly expressing his annoyance, he expresses it indirectly, which is the definition of passive-aggression. The next time it happens, call him on it — and confront him directly. HE IS AN ASSHOLE WHO IS MARRIED TO AN IDIOT WHO HAS BEEN A DOORMAT FOR 40 (LONG) YEARS Dear Abby: My husband and I live in a lovely older neighborhood and have enjoyed wonderful neighbors over many years. The homes are close together with windows often left open in spring, summer and fall, as large shade trees keep our homes cool. A couple of years ago, our longtime next-door neighbors moved, and a new neighbor, a single woman, moved in. She was quiet, and we would occasionally visit in the yard. Well, over the last few months, a “problem” has developed. This neighbor has a new male friend who is there much of the time. Since the new friend’s arrival, loud moaning sounds frequently emanate from her home. It quickly went from a bit funny to shocking to annoying. It’s unbelievable how loud and prolonged the moaning sounds are, the “Oh, Gods,” the slapping and spanking sounds, not to mention the frequent back-to-back sessions. Other neighbors hear it and have commented, so it’s not just we who are offended. One neighbor thought someone was in distress and almost called the police until another neighbor told her what it was. It has awakened us and kept us up at night. Also of concern is that there are small children among our nearest neighbors. Abby, is there anything you can suggest I do so our neighbor keeps her private business private without embarrassing or offending her? I would sure like to put an end to the auditory assault. — Kept Awake in Ohio Dear Kept Awake JEALOUS: Approach your neighbor privately and inform her that the sounds of her lovemaking are creating a disturbance not only for you, but also for the other neighbors. Tell her that one of them nearly called the cops, but someone was able to stop the person. Then suggest that when she entertains her gentleman caller, they close the windows, because not only are people scandalized, but there are children who can hear what’s going on. Then cross your fingers. If the noise isn’t abated, RECORD THEM FOR A FEW DAYS, THEN DO inform the authorities AND RECORD THEIR VISIT, THEN SEND THE WHOLE THING TO AMERICA’S FUNNIEST HOME VIDEOS.

well, this IS a thread about positions...

and a banana peel on the floor for entertainment value.

We know... we've seen the size of your shoes.

Solar power canopy at JFK long-term parking lot to help power AirTrain, nearby homes Swing Dancing at The Castle in Fort Totten 4/26 Chinese-style charcoal BBQ and live music at Gao’s BBQ & Crab 4/26

Contact restored. That was the message relieved NASA officials shared after the agency regained full contact with the Voyager 1 space probe, the most distant human-made object in the universe, scientists have announced. For the first time since November, the spacecraft is returning usable data about the health and status of its onboard engineering systems, NASA said in a news release Monday. The 46-year-old pioneering probe, now 15.1 billion miles from Earth, has continually defied expectations for its life span as it ventures farther into the uncharted territory of the cosmos. It wasn't as easy as hitting Control-Alt-Delete, but top experts at NASA and CalTech were able to fix the balky, ancient computer on board the probe that was causing the communication breakdown – at least for now. A computer problem aboard Voyager 1 on Nov. 14, 2023, corrupted the stream of science and engineering data the craft sent to Earth, making it unreadable. Although the radio signal from the spacecraft had never ceased its connection to ground control operators on Earth, that signal had not carried any usable data since November, NASA said. After some serious sleuthing to fix the onboard computer, that changed on April 20, when NASA finally received usable data. In interstellar space The probe and its twin, Voyager 2, are the only spacecraft to ever fly in interstellar space (the space between the stars). Voyager 2 continues to operate normally, NASA reports. Launched more than 46 years ago, the twin spacecraft are standouts on two fronts: they've operated the longest and traveled the farthest of any spacecraft ever. Before the start of their interstellar exploration, both probes flew by Saturn and Jupiter, and Voyager 2 flew by Uranus and Neptune. They were designed to last five years but have become the longest-operating spacecraft in history. Both carry gold-plated copper discs containing sounds and images from Earth, content that was chosen by a team headed by celebrity astronomer Carl Sagan. For perspective, it was the summer of 1977 when the Voyager probes left Earth. "Star Wars" was No. 1 at the box office, Jimmy Carter was in the first year of his presidency, and Elvis Presley had just died. https://www.aol.com/contact-restored-nasa-voyager-1-192332625.html

'The Heart of Rock and Roll' review: Huey Lewis' Broadway show is... NYPOST.COM There’s rock and rolling in the aisles. JOHNNY OLEKSINSKI Here’s something I never imagined writing five years ago: In 2024, there are no musicals by Andrew Lloyd Webber currently running on Broadway, but there are somehow two that feature the songs of Huey Lewis & The News. Even more surprising is that one of those shows, “The Heart of Rock and Roll,” which opened Monday night at the James Earl Jones Theatre, has turned out to be an underdog highlight of the season. (The other, “Back to the Future: The Musical,” did not.) Rolled out modestly, little “Heart” is also a lot more fun and proudly frivolous than any of its sober-minded neighbors. It’s perhaps the first time in my life that I’ve been happy to see a confetti cannon at curtain call. The show is hilarious, too. Set in 1987, the musical is not only a brightly-colored time machine back to the decade of big hair and boomboxes, but the lighthearted Times Square of not so long ago. Lewis’ catchy hits like “Back In Time,” “The Power of Love” and “Hip To Be Square” are paired with book-writer Jonathan A. Abrams’ winning jokes about human resources and IKEA. There’s rock and rolling in the aisles. I don’t mean this as a slight, but Abrams’ man-with-a-plan tale could be ripped from a lovably bad 1980s movie such as “The Secret of My Success” or “Road House.” Actually, as Bobby, a Milwaukee factory worker who’s trying to climb the corporate ladder, the dishy and talented Corey Cott is the spitting image of the latter film’s star Patrick Swayze in “Dirty Dancing.” Bobby’s workin’ for a livin’ at a cardboard plant, run by Mr. Stone (John Dossett) and his daughter Cassandra (McKenzie Kurtz), but he dreams of rising the ranks into a plum sales gig. After “Kinky Boots,” you would think there was no more cleverness to be mined from assembly-line shenanigans. Wrong! Choreographer Lorin Latarro has the cast perform a campy tap dance on a big piece of bubble wrap that’s “Anything Goes” meets the Monty Python coconuts. After Bobby goes rogue and fails at signing a big client, the boss gives him the ax. Determined to succeed regardless, he follows Stone and Cassandra to a conference in Chicago with friend and HR director Roz (Tamika Lawrence) to try one more time to win the account of a wacky Swedish furniture store founder named Fjord (Orville Mendoza). While staying at the Drake Hotel, a romance blooms with work-obsessed Cassandra, even though she’s also being chased by her preppy ex-boyfriend Tucker (Billy Harrison Tighe, a real smarm-er). And Bobby also starts to have the urge to rejoin his old rock band, The Loop. You see what I mean about the plot resembling (surely on purpose) wacky ‘80s movies? “The Heart of Rock and Roll” is practically “Cocktail.” Cranked-up antics ensue on Derek McLane’s set that begins as Super Mario Bros.-style pipes of the factory, then whooshes to bubblegum plush settees at the hoity-toity Drake and finally a concert venue. This Wonka-fied vision of a workplace is populated by sensational dancers and singers, who fuse rock, pop and musical theater styles with ’80s informercial grins. But they sell the tunes with knockout comedy. There’s a Richard Simmons “Sweatin’ To The Oldies” parody, and a dream ballet for Cassandra about how horrifying it would be to marry her ex. Kurtz makes for a caffeinated version of Melanie Griffith in “Working Girl” — quirky, optimistic and appealingly awkward. And Lawrence, as irritated Roz, speaks fluent punchline. Playing the Swede, all Mendoza needs to do to get laughs is weirdly say sauna (“soooow-nuh!”). When most musicians hand over their catalogue to a Broadway show, it’s for a respectable biography like “Beautiful: The Carole King Musical” or “Jersey Boys.”

Man suffering from possible OD rolled in chair from apartment and left to die in back of NYC pizzeria Hanging out in Staten Island... Two people were caught on camera pushing a man suffering from a possible overdose in a rolling office chair to the back of a Staten Island pizza shop, where he was found dead Sunday morning, law enforcement sources said. And while the duo returned a short time later, it was only to retrieve the chair as the man, 32, laid face up on the ground. Surveillance footage captured the depraved body dump around 2 a.m. on Sunday. The suspects were seen rolling the man from a nearby apartment to the pizza place just around the corner and placing him on the ground. A worker at the pizzeria found the body when she opened up the shop around 6:15 a.m.

Ex-school cop on the run after allegedly killing teacher ex-wife at her school, murdering girlfriend and abducting kid on day he was due in court for child rape Washington State Police have labeled Elias Huizar, 39, as “armed and dangerous” and fear he may commit more crimes. I'm guessing his resume says he excels at multi-tasking.

Is that anything like decoupage?

Photo of the Day: Green-Wood Cemetery.