35 - and feeling so worn out.

[Merboy]

In the late 20s and early 30s, I saw unbelievable aging happen to me. I remember when I was 27 and looked at the mirror after a hard day and never saw myself look so old. Now I'm in mid-30s and I look unbearably bad. I gained 130 pounds within the past decade, going from 140 to 270, and the weight has not gone down.

 

At 25, I had faith I'd meet a man one day. Today, I am under no delusions anymore and realize there is no such thing as a "perfect romance."

 

I decided to hire in my late 20s as my body was worn down because I saw the clock ticking. I was one of the last holdouts out of anyone I knew when it came to intimacy. There simply was no intimacy until I began to hire. Hiring offered a rare opportunity to meet guys I knew I could not get to look at me twice out on the street.

 

Now at 35, I'm looking more for a really handsome companion - a weekend, dinner, and conversation. My general feelings about sex are undergoing dramatic change - I guess I'm getting older and beginning to lose interest in just the physical bodies of men.

 

I find 35 a hard age. You're not young anymore and you're not that old either. They keep saying "40 is the new 30" and all that stuff but I think for the past decade we've seen people desperately try to hold onto their youth. I'd rather just age... gracefully if possible, but I know it's coming and I know youth is long-gone.

 

I just wanted to share that with y'all and also ask you about your age and how you feel about it. Do you have any regrets or bitterness about the choices you've made in life? Do you struggle with aging at all? Are you secretly longing to be "young" again?

[jtwalker]

I'd like to tell you it gets better, the worn out part, but it gets worse. If I had a time machine, I'd warp back a decade and take care of my weight issue. As hard as it is to lose weight at 35, its harder at 45 and I assume harder yet at 55. I'm trying to take care of it now so that 55yo me can't say the same thing. Besides, eventually your blood sugar, erection (gasp) and other stats start to go and then feeling inadequate is suddenly not your biggest problem.

 

I'm making some assumptions here. Assuming you are like me, my weight has been the center of my image and relationship issues for as long as I can remember.

 

I suspect that if you and I both just bit the bullet and got rid of the weight (others have done it, so it is possible), I bet that would improve things just a bit.

[EastbayMike]

Get a grip and buck up! 35 is young. My 30s was the decade of my fondest memories. You are wasting precious time wallowing in self pity. Soon you'll be 40 wishing you were 35 again. Then 50 wishing you were 40. Take charge of your life for god's sake! Live in the present.

[+ DERRIK]

I think the last 12 months has aged us 1 year plus some.

[+ Axiom2001]

I'd like to tell you it gets better, the worn-out part, but it gets worse. If I had a time machine, I'd warp back a decade and take care of my weight

 

I suspect that if you and I both just bit the bullet and got rid of the weight (others have done it, so it is possible), I bet that would improve things just a bit.

 

As one who has had a problem with his weight and image during the past 2 decades, I joined WW and stuck with the program and became a life member.

 

I reached my goal and remained a little under it. I had to purchase an entirely new wardrobe; I received far too many compliments (some folks becoming absolutely ridiculous), and I continued to engage the services of sex providers w/o any difficulty a month prior to the horrendous pandemic hitting our world.

 

I continued being faithful to what I eat and continue to feel better about myself.

 

Begin the program and see what benefits would be reaped. Last September I turned 80 but feel younger as well as look it as well.

 

I am not escaping being a citizen of senior status.

Edited January 13, 2021 by Axiom2001

[+ Lucky]

If you want to lose weight, build your confidence that it is possible. Not every one wants to lose weight, the reason I ask. But my experience in losing weight is that the heart rate dropped, the blood pressure dropped, the blood sugar lowered, the knees felt better with less weight on them, and my general outlook improved. And that's with just a 40 lb. loss.

[+ Axiom2001]

I think the last 12 months has aged us 1 year plus some.

 

It depends on how one has or has not adjusted to these horrendous times.

[bendable2019]

This is why the non-penetrative sex is great as we age. There’s not much struggle to cum but more on satisfaction. My nipples are supple as ever and a good slow rim brings to the abyss. LOL... gone are the “Give it me baby ah ha ah ha’ days... ???

[marylander1940]

In the late 20s and early 30s, I saw unbelievable aging happen to me. I remember when I was 27 and looked at the mirror after a hard day and never saw myself look so old. Now I'm in mid-30s and I look unbearably bad. I gained 130 pounds within the past decade, going from 140 to 270, and the weight has not gone down.

 

At 25, I had faith I'd meet a man one day. Today, I am under no delusions anymore and realize there is no such thing as a "perfect romance."

 

I decided to hire in my late 20s as my body was worn down because I saw the clock ticking. I was one of the last holdouts out of anyone I knew when it came to intimacy. There simply was no intimacy until I began to hire. Hiring offered a rare opportunity to meet guys I knew I could not get to look at me twice out on the street.

 

Now at 35, I'm looking more for a really handsome companion - a weekend, dinner, and conversation. My general feelings about sex are undergoing dramatic change - I guess I'm getting older and beginning to lose interest in just the physical bodies of men.

 

I find 35 a hard age. You're not young anymore and you're not that old either. They keep saying "40 is the new 30" and all that stuff but I think for the past decade we've seen people desperately try to hold onto their youth. I'd rather just age... gracefully if possible, but I know it's coming and I know youth is long-gone.

 

I just wanted to share that with y'all and also ask you about your age and how you feel about it. Do you have any regrets or bitterness about the choices you've made in life? Do you struggle with aging at all? Are you secretly longing to be "young" again?

 

Have you thought about doing some hiking, seeing a nutritionist to see if you have insulin resistance, etc. ?

[Merboy]

Have you thought about doing some hiking, seeing a nutritionist to see if you have insulin resistance, etc. ?

Gee that could be possible... so I might have diabetes? AND YES I definitely need to do a lot more walking. I used to live next to a wonderful park where I would walk every day and listen to music (carrying a CD player). I really need to start seeing a nutritionist as well!

[Monarchy79]

You’re 35, this is the PRIME of your life.

Let go of that B.S. mindset into your head and Start fresh.Today!!!

 

1.) Get a FULL PHYSICAL from your doctor, to consider any underlying health conditions, then seek any applicable treatments.

 

2.) Start moving. I don’t care if it’s a daily walk, Or a You Tube fitness video. Physical activity is not just for vanity, it’s for total body health, inside and out. Your body is a machine, and must be regularly used in order to keep working.

 

3.) See a dermatologist, to resolve any skin aging issues you think you may have. Then start on a basic skincare regiment to get things in order.

 

4.) Upgrade your diet. Eating better, in combination with exercise and a skin care routine will create an overall synergy of improvement.

 

One more thing:

Stop seeing self-maintenance, as “struggling to stay young”.

Self-maintenance is a personal responsibility to ensure that you can actively take care of yourself and live your best life.

 

Stop hiring the men you want to be with, and start investing in yourself, to BECOME the man you’d want to be with.

[KrisParr]

Get thee to a physician now. And if you don’t “click” then find another. Eventually you want to find a professional who believes in you. I also recommend WW. Although I’ve been athletic, but if you’re not hitting the gym or playing some sort of sport, age will not be your friend and the pounds will arrive, but you already know that. Work on small goals, seriously. One pound a month in 5 years will be a whole new you. I had gained 40 over 10 years very slowly, and it took a lot of work and diligence, but with WW, and some great support, I now weigh what I did at 25, which is 160. It’s a choice every day what goes in the mouth and making myself get up and move off the couch. Good luck, there are many on this board who will go the extra mile for you - just ask.

[marylander1940]

Gee that could be possible... so I might have diabetes? AND YES I definitely need to do a lot more walking. I used to live next to a wonderful park where I would walk every day and listen to music (carrying a CD player). I really need to start seeing a nutritionist as well!

 

If you remain at 270 you're likely to turn diabetic among other things.

 

Insulin Resistance Diet, Symptoms, Treatment & Diagnosis (medicinenet.com)

 

Hereby I summon our resident Doctor @Unicorn

 

Give it a shot! Good luck and thank you for sharing your feelings!

[kingsley88]

When I turned 35 I just remember filling out surveys and I had to bubble in the 35-44 age category instead of the 21-34 or 30-34 and somehow I felt old too. I've found that I tend to feel 'old' when I hangout with friends who are younger than me. When I hangout with friends older than me, I tend to feel 'young'. Not sure if that will help or not. I'm currently 37 and I don't think of myself as old though I may do so in a few years.

As for the weight issue, I'm no help there as my weight tend to goes up and down plus or minus 20 pounds depending on the season. Hang in there bud. I've watched chub porn online and there are guys who look like they weigh 300+ who still get laid from apps and what not!

[KrisParr]

My diabetes diagnosis arrived when I hit my peak weight. But my grandparent, dad, and one brother all have it as well. Obesity doesn’t cause it, but it sure doesn’t help. With a little medication, and exercise, my A1C is well under control. Here are common symptoms - especially number 8. And ED on occasion.

 

1. using the bathroom frequently.
   
2. increased drowsiness.
   
3. infections.
   
4. increased thirst.
   
5. increased hunger.
   
6. itching.
   
7. weight loss.
   
8. fatigue.
   

[+ Charlie]

I just had my annual physical. The doctor told me that every clinical test that was done shows that I'm in excellent condition, for my age. I have little hair left on my head (but a lot in my ears and nose); I have almost no fat, so my weight is maintained by losing muscle instead; and my skin is mottled and sagging, no matter how much sunblock and moisturizer I use. I still remember the panic I felt in the WC of a train in Europe when I saw my first grey hair in the mirror when I was in my 30s: "No!! My sex life is over!" Now I see a new age spot and say, "Whatever." As long as I can see clearly, hear my favorite music over the tinnitus in my ears, remember where I put my wallet, learn how to use FaceTime for a telemedicine conference with the doctor, and still occasionally beat some young whipper-snapper on the tennis court (I won 6-3, 6-2 on Sunday!), I'll be OK.

[bendable2019]

Have you thought about doing some hiking, seeing a nutritionist to see if you have insulin resistance, etc. ?

 

Thanks Dear. I will surely start on that. ??❤️❤️??

[RandyVue]

I don't know who brainwashed you into thinking 35 is old, but you are wrong. 35 is still very young in terms of years. You're an adult, but a young adult. Scientists have literally studied the brains of human beings and determined that we aren't fully adults until we hit our 30's, though some physically age faster than others due to many factors https://www.bbc.com/news/newsbeat-47622059

The first thing we say when someone dies in their 50's is that "they were so young when they died," but some people pretend like it's old when that person is alive...it's very, very strange.

I don't think people should pay attention to the number anyway because it is something created by man that was actually rooted in paganism...and its just a number system that has no real meaning other than it marking an anniversary of your birth, but every day is literally an anniversary of your birth so you don't need to wait 365 days to acknowledge or celebrate it and I think it's strange that so many people do...but that's a whole other discussion. With all of that being said, I think you are only as old as you look, think, and feel.

Edited January 13, 2021 by RandyVue

[marylander1940]

When I turned 35 I just remember filling out surveys and I had to bubble in the 35-44 age category instead of the 21-34 or 30-34 and somehow I felt old too. I've found that I tend to feel 'old' when I hangout with friends who are younger than me. When I hangout with friends older than me, I tend to feel 'young'. Not sure if that will help or not. I'm currently 37 and I don't think of myself as old though I may do so in a few years.

As for the weight issue, I'm no help there as my weight tend to goes up and down plus or minus 20 pounds depending on the season. Hang in there bud. I've watched chub porn online and there are guys who look like they weigh 300+ who still get laid from apps and what not!

 

Enjoy!

 

More to love! Guys with a few extra pounds! | Page 6 | M4M Message Forum (m4m-forum.org)

[+ sync]

I find 35 a hard age. You're not young anymore and you're not that old either. They keep saying "40 is the new 30" and all that stuff but I think for the past decade we've seen people desperately try to hold onto their youth. I'd rather just age... gracefully if possible, but I know it's coming and I know youth is long-gone.

For me, aging became much more palatable after considering the only other alternative. ?

[Guest]

Yikes. I've never thought of 35 as older. I'm so, so grateful that in my late 50s, I don't have any wrinkles, any gray hairs or hair loss, and little loss in physical health. A weight like yours should be addressed, from a health standpoint. Exercise will mitigate some of obesity's adverse effects, but ultimately something will get you. Now that there's a cure for hepatitis C, fatty liver is becoming the #1 reason for needing a liver transplant (and that's if you can get one). When adverse consequences of obesity happen depends on your exercise pattern and genetics, but eventually a substantial majority of obese people will develop hypertension, type II diabetes, back problems, and knee problems. While there are treatments for hypertension and DM-II, back problems really don't have very good treatments overall, and knee replacement surgery tends not to have good outcomes with those with BMI's over 35.

Now that I'm retired, I hope to be able to devote even more time to staying in shape. I urge the OP to devote efforts to staying in shape as well.

[CuriousByNature]

I wish I could go back a few years to 35... there is a lot I would have done differently. Even better if I could go back to 15.

 

@Merboy - hopefully you have many more years in front of you than you do behind you. Its never too late to make positive changes - even one step forward is still a step forward from where you are at. Break things up into manageable goals to reduce the pressure on yourself and make sure you celebrate each success.

 

This is very much a 'do as I say and not as I do' post, because I have rarely taken my own advice. And that may be why I often wish my father had worn a condom the night I was conceived!

[caramelsub]

I have the opposite problem. I wish I was older. I’m in my early 30s, but I wish I was in my 40s. I don’t care about looks fading with age. I wish I was more established. With a house, money in the bank, and a more established work history. I remember my twenties being like hell. It’s only now that I feel like my life is starting to plateau and even out. Anytime I have a car problem or emergency I still have to call mom or dad for support or money. It sucks being a millennial. And with the cost of living rising where I live, it’s difficult to be completely independent.

[marylander1940]

I have the opposite problem. I wish I was older. I’m in my early 30s, but I wish I was in my 40s. I don’t care about looks fading with age. I wish I was more established. With a house, money in the bank, and a more established work history. I remember my twenties being like hell. It’s only now that I feel like my life is starting to plateau and even out. Anytime I have a car problem or emergency I still have to call mom or dad for support or money. It sucks being a millennial. And with the cost of living rising where I live, it’s difficult to be completely independent.

 

Don't you worry, time will go by, that's a given in life!

 

Accumulation of money is also something that happens to most who simply live within their means and invest their earnings.

 

I hope mom and dad don't know about you hiring

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

Aging disgracefully is (mostly) a choice people make. It's years of bad decisions, regrets, what-ifs and I-shouldas.

 

Stop the cycle now while you're still young enough to make seismic changes.

 

Like I tell a lot of other escorts and guys in porn, live for tomorrow, not just moment to moment.