InChiTown

With very few exceptions, a provider who can’t manage to be where we agreed, at the time we agreed, at the price we agreed, gets struck off my list. If the guy follows up, apologizes, gives a plausible explanation, etc., sometimes I’ll reconsider; but it always leaves a bad taste in my mouth. The guys I see regularly are as anal (you’ll pardon the expression) as I am about where, when, and how much. Life is too short, and mine in particular is too chaotic, to put up with that crap.

The whole discussion around allegations that the provider is “illegal” is off track. Can we please get back to the extortion discussion? 🤔

Sounds right.
The problem is when the overpriced NYC escorts come to places like Chicago and expect the same reception.

I see both sides of this and am conflicted.  Totally understand Misterhumphries POV and the stigma.  For me the fantasy/reality of having a massage and it turning into something sexual is exciting.

I get what you're saying, and I don't want to overly dissect things, but I still find it hard to see how his reply to you was objectively a dismissal.  I can totally understand that it subjectively felt like a dismissal, but the average person reading the text would not likely come to that conclusion based on what he wrote.  He even thanked you for the offer.  Some could argue that you dismissed him by not replying to his text, until 12 hours later.  True, he did not ask any follow up questions, but there is no reason to if he only wishes to consider professional photographers.  I imagine that he thought the conversation was over once he told you he was not interested in being photographed and you did not respond with any other interest in meeting.  I have never met with anyone, so I don't know what an interaction like this is supposed to look like, and I'm sorry you have been rushed and scammed by others in the past.   It makes a person understandably wary, and in some cases we can become extra sensitive to how a message is given to us.  Maybe this is part of the situation?  I am nobody to judge or guess what goes on in another person's mind, but it is incredibly difficult to view text messages objectively if we have been hurt or disappointed in the past - it is too easy to read a tone into them that may not have been intended.  Or the guy is a jerk - but I can't come to that conclusion on an objective basis.  This is part of the issue with social media and virtual relationships - too much depends on our assumptions of one another, and not enough is based on real life connections.  

Since PD1_jap did not want to share his conversation. I contacted Lewis.
“Hi Lewis, I’m excited to see you this coming weekend. I have a quick question before we continue to speak about our meeting. I’m sure you get a lot of clients contacting you throughout the day. I’m curious in the past few days have you had anyone contact you and been rude toward you? Or called you rude, conceited, dismissive?”
Lewis - “ Hey hey, hahaha. What a funny question, it doesn’t happen often that someone is rude, but yes! Yesterday/day before that. How do you know? What makes you ask? Some guy contacted me and asked to take my pictures, so I asked for his professional link, he said he isn’t a pro but an amateur, so I replied “Sorry not interested. Thanks though” then he got butt hurt and asked me “How many people have fucked you over to be so dismissive” haha….so I told him to move on and don’t be so butt hurt by me politely declining his offer. Not heard back since thankfully. That’s it though. Why?”
”Thank you Lewis. As always I appreciate your time. I was asking as on an online forum someone mentioned you being dismissive toward them and I was curious why? Doesn’t sound like you.  I know from experience that is not your vibe. I was checking facts.
Lewis - “Ha hilarious! Some people are weird! Thanks for checking in……..” 
How coincidental only one person has called him dismissive in the last couple of days. 

Stop digging.  You came across poorly, to him and to those of us who've read this thread.  You wanted to take his pics, he (politely) declined.  That should have been the end of that particular issue, but you became obnoxious and agressive by suggesting  he must have been burned and that he was dismissive.  That interpretation says tons about you, and nothing about him.
 

Just out of curiosity @pd1_jap…..how old are you?  The vast majority of forum members here have been around the block more times than the good humor man (well-versed in life and matters like we’re discussing in this thread).  You, on the other hand, seem to just be starting out in life.  Give it a rest and learn something from what members are trying to tell you.  

This was your original statement. You are in the wrong. Learn from this.
(1) Making a broad statement. Off of zero to little interaction on a forum to damage the character of a provider isn’t ok.
(2) You showed us all how you did not communicate effectively to the provider. He turned you down and your feelings were hurt. 
(3) You’re now telling others to move on. It’s clear via your messages, you did not move on when Lewis told you NO. You had to text him a day later to call him “dismissive”. A day after commenting on this forum and calling him conceited??? Your interactions do not make sense. 
No this isn’t a Del Taco. This isn’t a restaurant. This isn’t a typical  “customer service industry”. 
Therefore you need to learn how to better communicate with providers. You are the person looking for a service. Communicate effectively what you are seeking and maybe your outcomes will be better. 
Looking at peoples emoji reactions I’m not alone In this thinking!

Very handsome, big uncut tool, I enjoyed his man nectar.

After one interaction, you call someone conceited. It’s says more about you than him. Many of us have had incredible interactions with Lewis and have stayed in contact. He’s far from conceited. He’s treats people how they treat him…….
Very excited he is visiting the west coast this week.

As I think much of Lewis, I will say in business discussions he's brief and direct; I could see how someone could take this as dismissive; he's not dismissive in person, but he's also quite direct in person as well.   As to conceited, in skills both relating to this forum and other skills, I'll say I think he's quite confident.  I've never experienced it as conceit.

I was at at 5 star hotel on Costa Rica and decided to get a massage. I was draped as usual in that type of setting. Lying on my stomach I was getting a bit aroused by his touch as he went just a bit further in his touch than most. After I rolled over and he was working my legs I started to get an erecting. I said the usual “oh sorry” and he proceeded to move the sheet aside and stroke me off. It was totally unexpected and a huge turn on. He cleaned it up and then finished the massage. Afterwards he left to wait outside the room (literally outside) and when I joined him he asked if I’d liked the massage. 

I rarely tip but I only see experienced/expensive guys at their places/hotels who are asking for how much they think they deserve (220+ usually). When someone is a bargain, goes over time, or creates a special connection I throw in 1-2 20s extra. I always leave reviews for quality masseurs and I’m quick to be a repeat customer if I had a good time, which I think people appreciate more than 40 bucks. Everyone has their own style, and it’s all about the vibe/relationship more so than the exact tip value. This is why YMMV. 

HE for me is simply a release. Most of the time a HJ but have had a masseur initiate a BJ on his own multiple times. Never paid for an upsell unless requested in advance and if it was an upsell, almost always declined.

What he’s selling is his youth, good looks and the innuendo that you’re going to get more than a massage. 
 
In most of these scenarios, what you’re going to get is:
1.) some cheap lotion or baby oil slathered on you for a few minutes, 
2.) a terrible massage, 
3.) a brand new set of blue balls
The word has been out to quite a few guys looking for some easy money that getting on these massage sites is an easy “money grab”.
 
 
 
 
 
 

I've had 2 sessions with him. Nice guy. Nice massage good techniques and style.  I've left happy both times

Nineteen Eighty-Four is one of those books I pick up repeatedly, thinking I am just going to read a scene or a passage and end up reading the whole thing again. Everything I've needed to know about human behavior, I learned from this book.

No. There are some things I consider private. My hobby of hiring, my net worth/annual earnings and the Justin Bieber blow up doll I have in the back of the closet in the hallway are a few examples of things I do not share with anyone. 🤫

No.    I have a few friends I met here on the forum who I openly discuss with, but not outside of this forum - there is too much judgement and negativity about the topic.

I completely agree about having low expectations with erotic massage and respecting the fact the provider’s ad is on a massage app. Unless you found out the provider also has an ad on rentmen. Anything beyond nudity, MT and HE depends on chemistry and mutual agreement with the masseur. If you and the masseur click, anything can happen. I have had some of the best sexual experiences of my life that way, involving kissing, embracing, rimming, oral, and yes, even anal sex. There’s nothing like the spontaneity and the intensity of going with the flow when two people explore their mutual sexual attraction by starting with sensual touch. 

Even the most experienced of us had a first time hire.  A bit of trepidation is expected but fortunately for most of us, that first touch, first kiss, first tingle of excitement usually has the nerves on the run and our cock rising to the encounter.   You are requesting a pretty vanilla experience and you described what you want clearly here.  Have him come in, offer him a beverage.  Have him come sit next to you on the couch.  If he doesn't initiate after a minute or two lean in for the kiss or place your hand on his groin.  You both know why you are there, so there is no reason to act like a teenager on a first date, though you may feel that way initially.  Once your eyes have met, your lips have touched and you hand has found your way into his pants, allow the action and the juices to flow.  
My suggestion is to be sober, but if you do take something to take the edge off, do not indulge to the point of not being in control of yourself and the situation.  
Also, do not be afraid to say no.  If he tries to do something you are not ready to do, a simple, not that or not yet should have him moving onto something else.  He will likely do the same.  Good luck with that first hire.  
 

Tell him you want to feel incredibly desirable. Even to someone as handsome as himself.
You want him to be in charge and you want to feel cherished.
That's simple enough that any professional provider would understand the scenario

The best contemporary romance novel of the year is Fire Season, by KD Casey, according to the NY Times. Fire Season involves 2 baseball players, one a Cy Young Award winner, the other a pitcher perhaps nearing the end of his career. I bought the novel for $4.99 on Amazon- the Kindle version that is.
Is it a really good, knock your socks off novel? I didn't think so, but that doesn't mean that I didn't enjoy it. The two players, both pitchers when you might think it should be a pitcher and a catcher, have both been married to women. Their romance takes time to build up. But, since there are sex scenes and it is a romance novel, the reader knows they will get together. Can they keep it from their teammates? How will their wives react? Will I get a boner reading the sex scenes?
KD Casey it is revealed is a woman. She apparently likes baseball and gets all those details accurately. Most gay romance novels seem to be written by women, and many times the sex scenes make one wonder how they could get man on man action so right. Casey does a good job here, especially in the first scene. I do admit to being confused at some of the action as I coouldn't really tell what the boys were doing at certain points.
Anyway, you like romance novels, you should like Fire Season.

Olivia. Waite of the NY Times writes:
For too long, I’d been craving a baseball romance book by an author who loves baseball and romance equally, and along came KD Casey’s FIRE SEASON (Carina Press, ebook, $4.99), the story of two major-league pitchers who become roommates and then considerably more. Casey’s work feels as supple and lived-in as a fielder’s favorite glove, resilient but never rough, and the difficulties of queer identity in an entrenchedly heterosexual industry are handled with care but never allowed to steal the limelight from her heroes.

You're too high. Inflation from 2019 to 2022 has been 11.39 percent cumulative or 3. 6 average annually. Inflation prepandemic was very low and in the first 6 months of the pandemic deflation.
So $275 is about $303 now.