KensingtonHomo

You didn't list any "turn-ons;" only turn-offs. And you're far from the only one. Some guys on here want to hire a 23-year-old and then are scandalized when they portray themselves as a young person by sticking out their tongue or giving the finger. Then there's the constant harping about tattoos as if we're debating whether someone can be buried in a Jewish cemetery rather than fucking. Almost 50% of people under 50 have at least one tattoo - so they've dismissed half the providers based on something arbitrary and widespread. I have four tattoos, none of which are visible when I'm dressed. I imagine meeting these guys, having a drink, they're into me and vice versa and then we start taking clothes off and they're horrified by my tattoos. It's funny to consider. It's also never happened. I see guys with tattoos that I find to be too much or ill-conceived, and that may play a role in my decision-making. But it's not a primary driver.

Why not just say you want a polite, smooth twink/jock who wears tighty whiteys? I don't understand the need to point out all the things one dislikes. It makes folks sound dull and close-minded.

As a native NYer, most of us avoid NYE because it's "amateur night." I'd recommend you look for a local who is less likely to be partying on NYE, who is well reviewed and experienced. If you have a type, maybe some of us can make recommendations.

Some providers don't require a deposit. We met with two of them yesterday. It will just limit who you can hire.

I don’t think the deposit is connected to the rest of it. Deposits are to show a client is serious; put some skin in the game. I will send $50 to secure an appointment but I won’t send half. Unfortunately, there are people who I doubt are genuine clients who waste providers’ time. In my experience, it’s only ever for the first meeting. The other requests or unwanted attention sucks too, but if it’s not serious a provider can block them. They can’t get back 2-3 hours they’ve put aside for a client that doesn’t show up.

Yeah. Some clients post wild stuff on here that proves they're not right.

Since I have literally shared my experience once on this forum, to have paragraphs and paragraphs written as some apologia/self-exoneration is a bit much. As I never intended to see Angus again, I didn't keep our messages. If I came across as "snarky" it was because Angus asked me to delete my comment. The point of this forum is to share our experiences, which is what I did. If everyone deletes their unpleasant experiences, we end up with a false portrait of providers. I did not search the forum for his name to write a comment that might hurt his reputation or business. When his name came up, and input was requested, I shared mine. The vast majority of my commentary here is positive or in defense of providers when clients are being unrealistic or mean-spirited. It was a subpar experience. Does that make @AngusStevensxxx a poor provider or a bad person? No. Do those facts change my experience? No. Did I end up bleeding in his bathroom? Yes. My primary concern with Angus' response here is that he exonerates himself while claiming to take responsibility. I "asked him" to behave that way. He "gave us a discount." Clearly, my post hasn't harmed his business (not that it was my intent), since he's had many clients jump to his defense. What I do and encourage others to do is take all the information available on a provider and make their decision based on that. For me, I will no longer share subpar experiences on main. I will share it in DMs where providers will have no opportunity to respond. In fact, this is what most clients do already, and now I understand why.

I started having gay sex at 13 and came out at 16. Since most of my 20s were during the height of the AIDS crisis, I very cautious about sex and could count on my fingers how many partners I had up to 25. I got sober that year and it made me braver. HIV was also becoming more of a treatable disease tho I still practiced safer sex. I met my husband when I was 28 and we’ve been together ever since. We were monogamous with room for erotic massages together or separately after we married. In Spain one of those massagers turned into a full on threesome. And we loved it! All the fears we had about jealousy or envy fell away. We ended up hiring another escort before we left Spain. Over the past 6 years, we’ve hired in spirts while also meeting some guys in person - especially while on vacation- and used the apps from time to time. The apps - as many of you know are pretty awful. And it’s even harder for a couple especially since we’re not into the whole “daddies” vibe. And mostly we’re hit on by guys in their 20s who want to bottom for us. It’s just not our scene. So we hire on average once or twice a month, and a bit more when traveling. We’ve had mostly really good experiences with a few duds. We tend to have one or two guys that we see for a few months and then sometimes they stop working or the thrill is gone. Sometimes we find ourselves wanting to experience a guy we haven’t seen in a while which is fun. Overall, it’s been a great addition to our sex life. We still enjoy just being together as well and hiring has improved that because it makes us communicate more.

Girl... I'm not watching all that. If you have something to say, just say it.

We watched Crashing before Bridgerton came out and I never made the connection. May have to rewatch. JB is super sexy in "Fellow Travelers" - which you can stream now. It stars him and Matt Bomer (whom I never found remotely appealing UNTIL he plays a dom in FT) as a couple during the McCarthy era. It's really well done and follows their on-again; off-again from the 50s to the 1980s.

Increasingly convinced you're not a provider. You don't engage meaningfully with clients. You just post snark, which isn't doing you or your colleagues any good. If you represent what "providers are too scared to admit to your face," it's a real turn off to hiring in general. Thankfully, there are real providers on here who counteract your bad faith posts.

My husband and I started hiring in 2019. Our first time was in Spain. I believe the rate was 150 euros. After COVID, when it was safe to hire again, we were getting $300-$350/hour. Now, it's not uncommon to come across relatively new guys (with recent profiles and no reviews) asking for $500/hour. That's a 40% increase in rates in about 4 years. Over the same period, cumulative inflation is about 25%. And that inflation affects clients and providers alike. It's not for me to say how much a provider charges, but it's not surprising that some clients are turning their noses up at such a steep rate increase. It's definitely deterring us from trying new guys. First, because our regulars have kept their prices consistent. Second, because a lame $500 appointment feels worse than a lame $300 appointment.

I've contacted him a few times with zero response. I've heard this is not uncommon.

If anything I’m probably more critical of my appearance than is realistic. And both me and my husband get complimented frequently by providers. We also don’t hire ripped guys in their 20s, so I tend to think the compliments are genuine. But I also think we (as men and then as gay men) put entirely too much emphasis on appearance- even when hiring. I’ve lived long enough to know that anyone can get laid. But not everyone can get laid by “a 10.” But in my experience - across hiring; hooking up, and dating - many people who are conventionally extremely hot are not particularly good lovers. Attraction is unpredictable. It’s not just what you can see with your eyes. There’s pheromones. Depth and timbre of someone’s voice. And then there’s charm and charisma; neither of which are captured in a photo. One of our consistent regulars is younger than I’m generally attracted to - in his 20s - and he’s thin and somewhat athletic but he has a little tummy. I suspect he may have been overweight in his teens. But he is absolutely incredible in bed. He’s both intense and easy going. We enjoy talking to him before and after. So take the compliments; perhaps you’re being graded on a sliding scale. Or perhaps you’re just this guy’s type. And don’t overthink it.

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In my experience, lots of providers have average-sized dicks - or maybe the high end of average, like 7". The other things you desire are coded as white and either midwestern or maybe from New England ("All American, fairly smooth, clean shaven). So maybe filter for those qualities too.

Hard disagree. This is very dehumanizing. In fact, "at will" employment is dehumanizing. Treating human beings like replaceable widgets is one of the reasons the US is one of the most miserable countries in the world. While I do think @savantsav is overthinking it a bit, I respect him for wanting to treat this provider with care and humanity.

Thank God you're anonymous. 🤣🤣🤣

Is there a medical or other reason why cumming is difficult for him? I occasionally have difficulty orgasming but I know that it's in my head. I realize a lot of providers don't guarantee cumming, but as it's really important to you and you don't see him that often, I'm a little surprised that he cannot rise to the occasion.

Sure, but since he cannot come consistently, why not find someone else? If you're flying to see him or him to see you, I'm sure you can find someone who meets all your needs.

I'm sorry that you felt/feel this way. There's so much pressure to be young in gay culture. It's quite sad because we internalize these pressures and it robs us of enjoying our lives as fully as we could.

On the surface level, it doesn't seem like you're compatible. You want a particular experience that he seems incapable of delivering consistently. Is there something outside of sex that keeps you coming back to him?

Since my husband and I mostly hire together, we often have threesomes. I find that with any sex people occasionally need a break because they've been going too hard, or they're overwhelmed with stimulation. I don't see that to be an issue. If anything, it's an advantage of having more than two people. That said, depending on participants' preferences (who's a top, bottom, vers), I could see someone feeling pressured to perform throughout. But we usually try to assure the other guys that they're allowed ot take a break.

This cannot be emphasized enough. If you look at providers' posts on here, the most common complaint is that a client isn't hygienic.

I call everyone "girl." It's certainly not meant as an insult. I find most women far superior to most men, so if anything, it's a compliment. Also frequently use "hooker," "bitch," or "hoe." But not in a sexual context.