Jamie21

I see the irritation @misterhumphrieshas around therapeutic masseurs being conflated with sensual or erotic masseurs. It’s because of out dated and puritanical attitudes towards sex, and the law being an ass. I start from the position that there is absolutely nothing wrong with doing sex work. As long as no one is being exploited then sex work is as good as any other work. It’s a societal need, and I hope that one day society will be mature enough to recognise that. For me, sensual or erotic massage is simply another type of massage. One should be properly informed and trained about the health risks etc, and trained to perform proper massage strokes, but ALSO be trained to massage genitals and areas that therapeutic masseurs don’t go. It’s certainly not just rub and tug. A great sensual masseur will understand how to give a fantastic therapeutic massage and they’ll understand how to arouse their client. It’s as much about what’s going on in their head as what’s going on in their genitals. In our society no one gets taught about how to get pleasure from their body, they find it by trial and error, if they find it at all. Having a sensual massage is a great step along the way to becoming a better lover.

You really do understand the massage scenario. As a masseur this is exactly the kind of thing I would recommend.

There must be some mentality that insists people should fall into categories that they define: “a sex worker is… a prostitute is…” etc. Lawyers? People who can’t abide ambiguity? People who like control? I’m a masseur, a sex worker, I have sex for money, I make porn. What category should I be in?

For me it depends how big he is and whether there’s going to be lots of positions. A small one (5 inch or less) is usually ok with a few goes with a bulb douche. If he’s big and it’s going to be extended multiple position sex or if I’m doing porn filming or a sex party then I’ll use a shower attachment and make sure everything is clean at least 2 hours before. I’ll also time my eating and avoid certain foods the day before. Probably also reassure myself with a bulb half hour before the session. Sometimes it’s not possible to anticipate so on those occasions it’s just bend over and hope everything is ok. I saw a client recently and wasn’t expecting to bottom so hadn’t prepared apart from superficially (in case a finger went in lol). During the session he wanted to top so I flipped him over and sat on it hoping that it would be a quick one (time was nearly up). Fortunately it was and when I got off I had a quick look to check everything was ok and it looked fine. I’ve no problem if things get messy, just stop and clean up, but some guys do freak out about it.

Unfortunately some clients think that sex workers are just doing it for fun in a casual way, and so they don’t see cancelling at short notice as being disrespectful. It’s an attitude I come across occasionally. They assume I’m just hanging around waiting for their call. They think it’s no big deal if I’ve wasted time travelling or preparing, or lost other work because they made an appointment on a whim and have now changed their minds because something better has come along. It’s an incredibly selfish attitude. Some don’t even bother to tell you they’re not coming, they just don’t show up. It upsets me because I really try to be professional and have high standards. Fortunately it’s usually possible to see this casual attitude when they make enquiries and so one can weed them out before they book. 99% of clients are great but there’s always a few who make life difficult.

Yes ‘giving him his time back’ is kind of not the thing he’d want. That time has already gone and he’s probably spent time preparing and booking the hotel etc. All of that wasted. He certainly wouldn’t see it as having the time back! Last minute cancellations are very annoying indeed: it’s impossible to schedule anything else and you’ve already committed time and money (probably) to the session and you’re out of pocket if you didn’t take a deposit. I’m not surprised he was annoyed. You should have messaged him to say you’d be late, turned up as soon as possible, and of course paid him the full rate even though your session was shortened. Sometimes if a client is late and I can move the session I’ll shift it all back by 15m but that’s only if possible and for a regular. If he is ok to accept another booking then I think you should pay a deposit when you book because I expect he will be reticent to commit again.

I did think once or twice during energetic sections that she was going to slip off completely and end up in a heap at the end of the bed. Didn’t happen unfortunately, would have been hilarious.

You wouldn’t use normal massage oil with a Nuru, it’s kind of not slippery enough. You use a powder that you mix up. It’s extremely slippery. I watched a masseuse give a Nuru massage to a guy at a sex party I was working at one time (massage themed party, I was there to help attendees with sensual massage). It was fascinating to watch her slide over him, she was very athletic and supple. Most of the time he was laying prone but did turn over part way through. It seemed to me that she got more enjoyment from it than he did.

You believe! I’m intrigued to know why the number is uncertain if it’s so few? Was it a case of “is it in yet”? I distinctly remember my first time bottoming…and he was large. It was definitely in. After he’d finished I lay there wondering if I’d be able to walk again. Half an hour later someone else was up there 😂.

Shouldn’t make any difference, if you pick the right masseur.

It’s not unusual! Lots of guys aren’t keen on anal. I see loads of clients who really don’t want anything to go down there but they love everything else. I do understand the anxiety about shit. If it does happen I have got used to just dealing with it. It doesn’t stop me doing anal because I like it either as a receiver or giver. The desire overcomes any inhibition about anal and I think that’s a learned response.

I’ve a client who I’ve seen a few times who asks me to keep my shorts on during the massage, and he asks that his groin / bum stay draped. I was surprised at the request first time I saw him. I said “you know this is sensual massage? It can include genitals, and climax if you want?”. I thought perhaps he’d misunderstood the nature of my massage (despite having seen my website which I think is quite clear about what can happen 😂). But he said “no I totally understand Jamie, and I’d love to have all of that but my religion says I must not. I just want a great massage. You can touch me there through the towel and if you’re ok I might feel you through your shorts but please don’t take them off or remove the towel”. I had to check with him if he was 100% sure because sometimes clients start with one intention and then during the massage they ask me to go further. But no, he was adamant that nothing beyond touching through fabric would happen. And so it turned out. I kind of found it a little challenging to end the massage…there being no natural climax and slow down so to speak but otherwise it was incredibly erotic. I could see he was hard, and so was I, but nothing happened. Afterwards he was so grateful for the session. Even more extraordinary was that he subsequently booked a 4 hands session with me and another masseur (a friend of mine who I absolutely adore and who I’ve filmed with). I had to tell my friend about the rules for the session; massage, touching, shorts stay on, no climax. On the day of the 4 hands the client again briefed us on what he wanted (and didn’t want!) and I could see the surprise on my friend’s face. I asked the client if he was ok if we, the masseurs, got naked and interacted during the session. Often a 4 hands develops into a sex session and I was kind of hoping he’d say he was happy to watch me and my friend play. But the client said that the religious rules meant he could not see another guys cock so we could kiss etc but must not remove our shorts. He was very insistent on this so I had to put some underwear on beneath my shorts because otherwise my cock would have poked out the leg hole (these were short shorts 😉). At this point the client went to shower before we started and my friend said to me “is this for real or is it a role play scenario and he’ll want to get DP’d after 15 minutes?”. I should add at this point the client has a wonderful bubble bum, which my friend had clearly noticed as the client walked in his underwear to the shower. “Wishful thinking” I replied “he’s definite about staying covered and no climax or anything, for him or for us”. Make it as sexy as possible but there’s a red line we must not cross”. So we proceeded to give our client the most erotic and intimate 4 hands no climax massage I’ve ever been part of. The sexual tension that could not be released made it all the more heightened. It’s fantastic to explore parts of the body in an erotic way without ever going to the genitals directly. I had to admire the client’s discipline, and appreciate the different perspective on erotic massage it gave me, even though I can’t understand the religious beliefs that he held. I should add that he paid us the normal rate for a sensual 4 hands session, and he was absolutely satisfied and happy with the massage because we’d respected his restrictions. It made me appreciate how having boundaries can enable what happens within them to be explored to its maximum potential. Sorry for the long response but I think it worth sharing because it was one of the most interesting massages I’ve ever done.

I always walk around naked in the locker room. It’s just more convenient than trying to keep a towel around my waist. Also I admit I like to annoy the muscle guys who show off how much they can lift in the gym. They’re surprisingly reluctant to be naked near me in the locker room if indeed they even drop their pants 😂

Or: 20🍆 + 20🍑 =♾️💦

20 guys = 40 holes. @Coolwave35knows what he’s doing.

Yes agree, I bottom too and prefer it to stay in once in. But sometimes if there’s two guys topping and they keep swapping ends etc then air gets pumped in!

Good for him if he can get that rate. I call it being entrepreneurial, creative and self sufficient. It just depends on your perspective. Some people are happy to work at a job where their future is laid out in a career path and they work to the established norms of corporate life. Others choose to take a different path. There’s many routes to self actualisation.

Ugh! You’re right!!! A missed opportunity 😢 But maybe Face Sitting is a whole new genre of sex work? You have Escorts, Masseurs,Porn stars and now…Professional Face Sitters (not to be confused with the Professional Face Shitters which is a whole separate body). One miss type into Google could get you in the brown stuff inadvertently. I do think face sitting is something that needs to be learned. So there’s merit in your face sitting school idea! It reminds me of a situation I had with guy one time when I was filming a porno. We’d done a fair bit of topping a bottom guy (I was filming with another top) and the next scene we had was the bottom would sit on my face. The bottom had been heavily used and I guess we’d pumped a lot of air in….(no one had cum yet). As the bottom squatted over me, his hole an inch from my face he let out an almighty long and loud fart. I simply couldn’t continue from laughing so we had to stop and take a break while the bottom got all the wind out of his system. It could, I acknowledge, have been much worse (as in the mistype above…) but it’s one of those things that should be taught to professional face sitters: check your face sittee (the receiver of the ass) is ok with a bit of blowback before you go down. That would be lesson 1. Lesson 2 is let him breathe a bit occasionally….

I’ve never heard of professional training in face sitting…

This! 100% And reading it has started the day well 🙂 All that matters is you fit on my massage table (and if you don’t…we can always use the Futon), and that you’ve no conditions that are contra indications for massage. Oh and that you want a good time too 😉.

I think it’s less of a dividing line and more like a Venn diagram where the two circles overlap to at least a 50% degree. Some sensual masseurs will work much closer to escort type work whereas others stick to just naked massage. In my time as a sensual masseur some of my sessions have been just massage and some where we have gone much further so that it becomes an escort session but always there’s been a base of massage.

Well said! A proper massage is important and needs to be done by someone who recognises that massage is an art. It’s not just rubbing your baby oiled hand up and down his back to kill time while you check your phone for insta likes and the mirror for your abs. A masseur knows that sensual massage is a seduction, to be savoured by his client. He knows it’s to enable him to learn about his client’s body and what turns him on so that when the time comes for his client’s climax he can press all the right buttons to get the desired response. Hire a masseur, because the journey is at least as important as the destination.

Yes they do tiptoe. It’s often due to shyness I think, but also I think it’s because they’re trying to be respectful, which I appreciate and is a nice disposition to have. However I’d say that there’s no need to be worried about causing offence by asking for something. You generally won’t cause offence to someone offering sensual or erotic massage because they’ll appreciate the clarity in most instances.

I’m so glad I work in a country where it’s legal to do sex work. It’s simply so much easier for me to discuss with clients what they want, and for them to ask. There’s none of this trying to decipher whether I’ll go further than a hand job from clues in my advert or asking coy questions and trying to guess! My clients can ask for exactly what they want, without worry that there’s any legal lines crossed or that I’ll get offended. Also, I really don’t think up-selling during the massage is a good idea because it interrupts the flow and is awkward. So I prefer to agree what’s included beforehand, and basically anything can be included. I don’t think there should be a hard line between massage work and escorting because it’s just different degrees of basically the same thing. The price will usually be the best indicator of where the service will be on the continuum from therapeutic only massage all the way through to escorting with full bareback sex. In my massage work I’ve worked along that whole range.

Cash is pretty rare here. Especially after the pandemic when many shops stopped taking cash. ATM’s mostly dispense £20 and £10. So £5 notes are rarer.