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Posted

If you died tomorrow, what happens to your phone (data on your laptop, iPad, computer, etc)?

Like:
– Texts, pics, videos
– Notes, cloud stuff, emails
– Grindr / Scruff / RentMen / “research tabs”
– Passwords and things you’d rather not have a straight relative accidentally open 😬

Do you:
– Have a trusted friend who knows what to do?
– Leave instructions somewhere?
– Use a password manager / dead-man switch?
– Or just hope the universe deletes everything before your family finds your charger?

Just curious if anyone actually has a plan?

Posted

Really glad you addressed this topic. As an older (64) closeted, married man of 25 years, nobody but my providers are aware of my double life. So, I need to make sure to use a secure password manager for all of data. Frankly, I do NOT trust any of my family or friends to keep my secret. 

Posted
1 hour ago, 7829V said:

If you died tomorrow, what happens to your phone (data on your laptop, iPad, computer, etc)?

Like:
– Texts, pics, videos
– Notes, cloud stuff, emails
– Grindr / Scruff / RentMen / “research tabs”
– Passwords and things you’d rather not have a straight relative accidentally open 😬

Do you:
– Have a trusted friend who knows what to do?
– Leave instructions somewhere?
– Use a password manager / dead-man switch?
– Or just hope the universe deletes everything before your family finds your charger?

Just curious if anyone actually has a plan?

Bozo has pre-paid and pre-arranged to be buried with his cell phone, laptop, and desktop.
There will be no privacy/confidentiality issues in a post-Bozo world.

BTC
🤡

Posted
43 minutes ago, SidewaysDM said:

Really glad you addressed this topic. As an older (64) closeted, married man of 25 years, nobody but my providers are aware of my double life. So, I need to make sure to use a secure password manager for all of data. Frankly, I do NOT trust any of my family or friends to keep my secret. 

While I can understand that you do not want to cause a stir while alive by informing friends and family of your inclinations, I wonder what your rationale is for keeping that secret to the grave.  I think that most closeted men have friends and family who have some idea that there are additional aspects to the life that those men have presented to the world.  Do you believe that the truth of those details would tarnish your post mortem image?  Do you think that they would wonder why you were not honest about it?  Do you feel that those you leave behind will be shocked or angry or feel betrayed?  

As for me, I have not made any arrangements for my computers, telephone or other devices.  While I would not invite my friends and family to come and read my posts here while I am alive, I think they might gather insight into me reading those posts after I am gone.  I doubt anyone would be interested in all 15000 or so postings.  I must admit however, I have stumbled across posts fromyears priors and some of them are almost like reading something someone else wrote.  I have considered getting them all printed out and making an erotic autobiography for my enjoy and hopefully for the enjoyment of others.  After all, many people enjoy a scandalous recount of the exploits of the recently departed.  

Posted

I physically wrote down all of my passwords -including bank, Facebook, email, etc- and put the paper in an envelope next to my will for my husband to open. He will take care of destroying the naughty evidence. Now, if he dies before me, the envelope will be shredded by me and who cares what happens to my fun activities. I am completely out of the closet and I won’t be there to witness the reaction of the survivors anyway 🤷🏻‍♂️

Posted
2 hours ago, Nue2thegame said:

And then there is the matter of what to about the personal toys, dildos, P Diddy volume of lubricants, costumes, harnesses, S&M regalia etc. all left for the unsuspecting to discover. 

From the UK series Coupling. Jeff is explaining to Susan that he (Jeff) and Susan's boyfriend Steve are porn buddies. 
 

 

Posted (edited)
18 hours ago, BOZO T CLOWN said:

Bozo has pre-paid and pre-arranged to be buried with his cell phone, laptop, and desktop.
There will be no privacy/confidentiality issues in a post-Bozo world.

BTC
🤡

But is there a big enough plot for this chatroom, let alone all the dismantled washroom stalls bearing your scribbles? 

Edited by SirBillybob
Posted (edited)
19 hours ago, 7829V said:

If you died tomorrow, what happens to your phone (data on your laptop, iPad, computer, etc)?

Like:
– Texts, pics, videos
– Notes, cloud stuff, emails
– Grindr / Scruff / RentMen / “research tabs”
– Passwords and things you’d rather not have a straight relative accidentally open 😬

Do you:
– Have a trusted friend who knows what to do?
– Leave instructions somewhere?
– Use a password manager / dead-man switch?
– Or just hope the universe deletes everything before your family finds your charger?

Just curious if anyone actually has a plan?

It’s tomorrow, 12 more hours in my time zone to home free Monday. Not risking slipping and bashing my brains out on frigid Montreal ice. Thanks a lot. Had planned a rare Sunday evening strip club visit. 

Edited by SirBillybob
Posted

I don't think there is anything on my phone that would be a problem--or even surprising--for anyone, but I did have a strange experience recently. When an old friend died suddenly, I didn't delete her from my contacts, and her husband inherited her cellphone. I had only met him once. Several weeks later,, I was out walking my dog with my phone in my pocket, and somehow I accidentally face-timed her number, and he answered. I didn't recognize him and he didn't understand who I was, so we had a very strange conversation before I figured out what had happened. (Somehow I have face-timed other contacts unintentionally with my phone in my pocket.)

The only thing on my browser that might be a problem would be this site, and everyone of my friends and family knows that I am gay, but whoever gets my computer and iPad would have to understand that I was "Charlie," and I doubt that they would bother to try to read 20+ years of my posts and messages. 

Posted
2 hours ago, Charlie said:

The only thing on my browser that might be a problem would be this site, and everyone of my friends and family knows that I am gay, but whoever gets my computer and iPad would have to understand that I was "Charlie," and I doubt that they would bother to try to read 20+ years of my posts and messages. 

If they saw your profile pic, wouldn't they know immediately that you're Charlie?

 

Posted (edited)
9 hours ago, Charlie said:

and I doubt that they would bother to try to read 20+ years of my posts and messages. 

This made me start to think back to how long I've been contributing here.  I have a vague memory of reading  The Review Site and most likely the Message Center with a very jaundiced view. Don't get upset. That wasn't a moral judgement by any means. I used a computer monitor that was on the way to going out for years before I had to replace it. And the screen had a strong yellow tinge going on. So that would have been around 1998-27 years ago. I honestly can't remember how I first came across the Review Site or the Atkol Forums. 
 

Was the Message Center-or I believe as it was called then-The Forum-started at around the same time as the Review Site,  or were they separated by a significant amount of time? 
 

But back to the question posed in the title of this thread-I'm going to be in big trouble if they investigate my phone. I have two hidden vaults (although one is basically a copy of the other), and there's no way to lock the pictures I've sent on some websites like Adam4Adam or on some apps like Scruff other than just the general code you have to put in to unlock the phone.
 

I hope my family will be charitable if they are the ones unlocking the phone. 

Edited by Gar1eth
Posted
On 12/20/2025 at 9:58 PM, Gar1eth said:

From the UK series Coupling. Jeff is explaining to Susan that he (Jeff) and Susan's boyfriend Steve are porn buddies. 
 

 

That man is cute but that woman is exquisite.  

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