% of clients who are straight

[Fridolf]

Was speaking with a provider who has become a friend. He reports that 85% of his clients are straight. 

Does this ring true for other providers on this site?

[Gilfson]

Nope if someone is hiring me a man to have sex with them they are not straight. Are some of them married with kids sure. But they are bi. Or at the very least heteroflexible. Class repeat after me… if you have sex with a man and you are a man you are not straight. 

[+ Jamie21]

They might outwardly present or describe themselves as straight, many are married (I see a ring on their finger), some tell me they are exploring, occasionally they say I’m their first experience with a guy but if they’re contacting me they aren’t 100% straight. I don’t think it matters. I just want to know what they are looking for not what  label they give themselves. 

[+ nycman]

5 hours ago, Gilfson said:

…if you have sex with a man and you are a man you are not straight. 

[+ Just Chuck]

Orientation is complex. The idea of a gay/straight binary caused me a lot of anxiety when I was younger.  There’s not a binary.  There’s not even a single-axis scale.  I think there’s a multi-dimensional scale for people’s sexual orientation. 

The Klein Sexual Orientation Grid (KSOG) gives one of the most succinct ways to describe a person’s sexual orientation that I’ve found.  You can take a quick seven-question quiz in the site that I linked and it will give you a grid describing orientation description table for your past, present, and future.

 

[Nightowl]

A lot of guys will claim to be straight because they are reluctant to admit to themselves that they might be otherwise.  

[+ FrankR]

9 hours ago, Fridolf said:

Was speaking with a provider who has become a friend. He reports that 85% of his clients are straight. 

Does this ring true for other providers on this site?

If the provider is somebody you are paying, he is not your friend. You may be on friendly terms, but that is likely where it stops. Confusing a friendly provider for a friend is likely to get your feelings hurt. 
 

Most providers dont ask for orientation, so getting a reliable answer here is doubtful.

[Nightowl]

2 minutes ago, FrankR said:

Most providers dont ask for orientation, so getting a reliable answer here is doubtful.

The only question about orientation I’ve ever been asked was whether I was a top or a bottom 😀

[LookingAround]

25 minutes ago, Nightowl said:

The only question about orientation I’ve ever been asked was whether I was a top or a bottom 😀

Interestingly I've been asked my orientation several times at the men's spa where I go for massage and I think it's because I always got a high score on straightacting.com back when it existed 😂😂😂. I think they were trying to figure out my story. So when I told them I was a gold star gay they were really surprised. Lol

Edited Sunday at 01:47 PM by LookingAround

[+ Just Chuck]

12 minutes ago, LookingAround said:

Interestingly I've been asked my orientation several times at the men's spa where I go for massage and I think it's because I always got a high score on straightacting.com back when it existed 😂😂😂. I think they were trying to figure out my story. So when I told them I was a gold star gay they were really surprised. Lol

I don’t trigger many guys Gaydar and they are often surprised that I’m not straight.  Escorts know why I hired them.  Masseurs often start to roll out the sensual/sexual side of it very slowly and a little timidly with me because they’re not certain that I’m game for that kind of massage.

[Gilfson]

5 hours ago, nycman said:

lol it’s not a big deal nothing wrong with not being straight but call a spade a spade.

[mtaabq]

Here’s my two cents - it’s not so  much a question IF a man is straight - because I agree if you’re taking it up the ass or sucking cock you’re not entirely straight - but if they IDENTIFY as straight. If 85% of that provider’s customers/clients IDENTIFY as straight then I can believe that. We all know men who get - and enjoy - sexual gratification from men but they identify as straight.

[Spikeguy]

Some guys think receiving head or topping is not gay lol.

[mtaabq]

1 hour ago, Spikeguy said:

Some guys think receiving head or topping is not gay lol.

And you’re absolutely right! Many men believe that. 

[+ Scott Carroll]

13 hours ago, Gilfson said:

Nope if someone is hiring me a man to have sex with them they are not straight. Are some of them married with kids sure. But they are bi. Or at the very least heteroflexible. Class repeat after me… if you have sex with a man and you are a man you are not straight. 

How can you be so absolute?  I have been servicing straight and/or married (to a woman) men for years.  Some may well be bi or gay, but the bulk of them were/are most probably straight.  Men who are not getting intimacy at home will seek it elsewhere and they oftentimes believe (absurd, I know) that getting a no-recip BJ is not technically cheating.  I provide them a safe non-judgemental space where they are free to express themselves as they wish.  The notion that if a man gets serviced by another man means that they are absolutely not "straight" is as absurd as saying that a gay man having sex with a woman means that he is heterosexual, in my opinion.   

[Gilfson]

8 minutes ago, Scott Carroll said:

How can you be so absolute?  I have been servicing straight and/or married (to a woman) men for years.  Some may well be bi or gay, but the bulk of them were/are most probably straight.  Men who are not getting intimacy at home will seek it elsewhere and they oftentimes believe (absurd, I know) that getting a no-recip BJ is not technically cheating.  I provide them a safe non-judgemental space where they are free to express themselves as they wish.  The notion that if a man gets serviced by another man means that they are absolutely not "straight" is as absurd as saying that a gay man having sex with a woman means that he is heterosexual, in my opinion.   

There’s a difference between experimenting with a man or woman. Yes you can have sex with a man to try it and I don’t think that makes you bi or gay. But if you are actively paying a man to have sex with you. Then you clearly have an attraction to that person. These “straight” men that hire you could easily hire a female escort they are making the choice to pay to sleep with a man. Look you can identify whatever way helps you sleep at night. But if you’re paying to have sex with a man then you’re not straight. That’s not me being judgmental either. I personally don’t care what you call yourself that doesn’t mean I have to agree with it🤷🏻‍♂️. Most of these men are probably bi and that’s fine. 

[+ Scott Carroll]

13 minutes ago, Gilfson said:

There’s a difference between experimenting with a man or woman. Yes you can have sex with a man to try it and I don’t think that makes you bi or gay. But if you are actively paying a man to have sex with you. Then you clearly have an attraction to that person. These “straight” men that hire you could easily hire a female escort they are making the choice to pay to sleep with a man. Look you can identify whatever way helps you sleep at night. But if you’re paying to have sex with a man then you’re not straight. That’s not me being judgmental either. I personally don’t care what you call yourself that doesn’t mean I have to agree with it🤷🏻‍♂️. Most of these men are probably bi and that’s fine. 

No one pays me for anything - I meet these straight men on doublelist.com and invite them to my home and service them no-recip style.  "You like to-may-to and I like to-mah-to; to-may-to, to-mah-to"!

[Km411]

6 minutes ago, Gilfson said:

There’s a difference between experimenting with a man or woman. Yes you can have sex with a man to try it and I don’t think that makes you bi or gay.

How many licks does it take? 😂 

Seriously, from this discussion it appears there could be many variables: (1) self-identification, (2) physical attraction, (3) frequency, (4) deportment, (5) sexual activity, (6) emotional attraction, (6) perception. And there are others not alluded to here, e.g., anatomical features. I default to self-identification because do we really need more stratifications in our society?

[Gilfson]

16 minutes ago, Scott Carroll said:

No one pays me for anything - I meet these straight men on doublelist.com and invite them to my home and service them no-recip style.  "You like to-may-to and I like to-mah-to; to-may-to, to-mah-to"!

Sure but the original post was speaking on a provider meeting with “straight” men. I.e. they are paying a provider for the service

[+ Scott Carroll]

6 minutes ago, Gilfson said:

Sure but the original post was speaking on a provider meeting with “straight” men. I.e. they are paying a provider for the service

Not to change the subject, but you have a very beautiful ass!

[Gilfson]

Just now, Scott Carroll said:

Not to change the subject, but you have a very beautiful ass!

Thank you I grew it myself😂😘

[LookingAround]

2 hours ago, Scott Carroll said:

How can you be so absolute?  I have been servicing straight and/or married (to a woman) men for years.  Some may well be bi or gay, but the bulk of them were/are most probably straight.  Men who are not getting intimacy at home will seek it elsewhere and they oftentimes believe (absurd, I know) that getting a no-recip BJ is not technically cheating.  I provide them a safe non-judgemental space where they are free to express themselves as they wish.  The notion that if a man gets serviced by another man means that they are absolutely not "straight" is as absurd as saying that a gay man having sex with a woman means that he is heterosexual, in my opinion.   

And the sky is not blue and water is not wet. I get it. Right. 

[+ Scott Carroll]

14 minutes ago, LookingAround said:

And the sky is not blue and water is not wet. I get it. Right. 

You should read some of my Cocktales on Squirt.

[jeezifonly]

The Kinsey scale (nor any other sexuality descriptors) is not measured in a laboratory - the behavioral pattern is based on what activities are self-reported. As far as a dating/romantic/longterm partnering situation goes, honesty up front does the least overall damage.

But with transactional/hookup sex, what he brings in the moment is what you get. He can slap on any label he wants. Either you get the sort of interaction you expect or you don't. If a 'heterosexual' client hires a male provider, the self-reporting of straight is already suspect.

A little interest can masquerade as a lot, but zero interest is difficult to hide. I guess for some men, the thrill of being "the first guy who's made me come" (again, self-reported) is the gay equivalent to "ooh that's going to be too big for me!" from the Slovenian photographer's model. (Only one of those responses results in jewelry, however...)

[+ Just Chuck]

I was listening to the Butt Honestly Podcast recently and the guest was a gay man recently released from prison.  He described some other inmates as “gay-for-the-stay”.  Men who live as straight men when they are free, but are flexible enough in attraction to have sex with other men when that’s the only game in town.