Bi guys' sexual roles.

[+ purplekow]

As a bi guy, I am usually a top.  I have tried to bottom, usually about once a year with very limited success.  So ever once and again, I try to bottom and I recognize why it has been so long since the last time I tried it.

So for the bi guys out there, are you willing and able to give and receive or are you a one way street?  This pertains only to anal, as I think most guys who have sex with men give and receive oral, though they may have a preference for one or the other.  

Edited Saturday at 10:52 PM by purplekow

[Nightowl]

I’m bi and do both.  They each have their appeal.  Fortunately I’ve found a couple of guys who have been willing to do both with me.

[+ JamesB]

I’m bi and genuinely enjoy both roles. My favorite encounters are those where we can flip roles, but it depends on the situation, bottoming isn’t my favorite because I dislike the prep work. When I hire, I’m almost always top only, with very few exceptions.

[+ PhileasFogg]

@purplekow, your story is my story.  I tried a few times out of curiosity, and I’m done trying.

Edited Sunday at 03:17 AM by PhileasFogg

[+ purplekow]

12 minutes ago, PhileasFogg said:

@purplekow, your story is my story.  I tried a few times out of curiosity, and I’m done trying.

There was an escort and porn actor Parker Williams and I decided that I wanted him to try and have me bottom.  He was generously endowed and he was trying to be concerned but, we we were not achieving the desired result.  In a moment of utter stupidity, I said. "just push the fucking thing in already". He did.  It was not fun.  I screamed quite loudly and begged him to take it out.  After he did so, he told me:  And that is why I love my job.  So at least one of us had a good time and to be fair, he more than made up for it on the turnaround.  

[pubic_assistance]

4 hours ago, purplekow said:

So for the bi guys out there, are you willing and able to give and receive or are you a one way street? 

I am primarily a top. But when I was younger and more active in same-sex pursuits I would end up with a lot of masculine top men who wanted to fuck me...so I went along with it willingly. I also used to spend time at sex parties where I laid in a sling and let multiple men fuck me for hours. 

I DO still find myself fantasizing about bottoming for certain big muscular men or possibly being spit roasted...but its been many years since I arranged any of that. 

[+ Jamie21]

I’m usually top, because most of my clients are bottom. However I do both roles, sometimes at the same time in the middle if I’m in a group. You do need to be in the right mindset to bottom though, I find if I’m in that mindset it doesn’t matter how big he is, he can go for it. But so many things have to align: I’ve to be confident about being clean (not perfectly so, but at least thoroughly douched), the position has to be right, empty bladder, lube, the moon has to be waxing (ok maybe I made that bit up). It’s such a faff to bottom tbh. I feel sorry for total bottom guys. It’s much easier to top. 

[+ PhileasFogg]

So @purplekow, is it your belief that it’s our bisexuality that contributes to our tight assed disposition or something else?  For me, it feels more physiological (although I’d never deny a psychological component)  In preparation for the few attempts I’ve made, I actually went to a lot of trouble to try to “train” myself with no success.   One very patient and trustworthy young man stayed rock hard for 30 mins barely getting the tip in and in his charming Australian accent finally said “nope, you’re just a top mate!”

@Jamie21, I think my “total bottom” friends would say it’s not harder to bottom.   Some of them have even described themselves as “lazy.”  But I’ll tell you what, they seem to love it.   In every case, they are not bisexual.

For those of us on the left side of the pond - “faff” means “to waste time on unnecessary or tedious tasks, or it can describe the tedious and time-consuming nature of a task itself. In essence, it describes a situation or activity that is more complicated, difficult, or time-consuming than expected, often involving minor annoyances or fuss” 🤓. I think it’s going to be my “word of the day” all week 🥸

[+ ApexNomad]

1 hour ago, PhileasFogg said:

I think my “total bottom” friends would say it’s not harder to bottom.   Some of them have even described themselves as “lazy.” 

Not harder? We don’t need to compare who brings what to the table or confuse prep with performance, but as a total bottom, I can assure you my prep before the deed is far more rigorous than whatever a top does on his way to meet me. And that’s just the prep. I haven’t even performed yet. One could argue, flippantly, that a top only needs to show up and… make a contribution. But I won’t. 

[+ PhileasFogg]

3 hours ago, ApexNomad said:

Not harder? We don’t need to compare who brings what to the table or confuse prep with performance, but as a total bottom, I can assure you my prep before the deed is far more rigorous than whatever a top does on his way to meet me. And that’s just the prep. I haven’t even performed yet. One could argue, flippantly, that a top only needs to show up and… make a contribution. But I won’t. 

I didn't mean to offend, but I'll also note that I was repeating what they tell me.   I'm not trying to suggest it's a competition

 

[+ Act25]

12 hours ago, purplekow said:

. "just push the fucking thing in already". He did.  It was not fun.   

I'll flip the script a bit...  I consider myself gay not bi even though I was previously married to a woman.  I can't bottom either.  I would really like to try and I was considering using the purplekow method - based on his experience I guess I'll pass. 

When I was younger (18-25, or so) and experimenting I could get some dick-sized dildos in without much difficulty and now no way.  Periodically I think about  "training" my ass to take dick - could still happen. 

[+ Jamie21]

1 hour ago, Act25 said:

I'll flip the script a bit...  I consider myself gay not bi even though I was previously married to a woman.  I can't bottom either.  I would really like to try and I was considering using the purplekow method - based on his experience I guess I'll pass. 

When I was younger (18-25, or so) and experimenting I could get some dick-sized dildos in without much difficulty and now no way.  Periodically I think about  "training" my ass to take dick - could still happen. 

You can train to take it. I find if I’m struggling then I prefer to be the ‘power bottom’ (I think that’s the correct description) and I’ll ride him cowboy style because then I can have more control over the pace, angle and depth. Tbh if I’m bottoming it’s my favourite position. If you’re learning to bottom you should find a good patient top and start like that. 

And as for it being ‘harder’ to bottom, as a vers guy I’m not saying one position is harder than the other. They’re different. I mean it is more faff (lovely word) to bottom because of the prep but of course it’s not absolutely necessary to prep. I’ve bottomed without prep (impromptu fucks, not with clients) and he just went in and stayed in until completion…easy, job done 😂. But generally it’s a faff to bottom. In the event it can be just as much ‘work’ to bottom. What sometimes is difficult with so called ‘lazy bottoms’ is they don’t position themselves for access. I’m sometimes thinking, arch your back…let me in!! 
 

 

Edited Sunday at 05:59 PM by Jamie21

[+ JamesB]

4 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

If you’re learning to bottom you should find a good patient top and start like that. 

 

This right here is key.

[theplayerking]

You can’t get fucked every now and then and expect to take it with ease. You have to train yourself with butt plugs.