Do you pay before or after?

[SecretProvider]

I was trained by the agency I started working with first to ask for money upfront, I would say "hey this is the first time we have met, is it ok if we get the money stuff out of the way and then we can both relax and enjoy the fun stuff" when they gave me the money I would leave it wherever they gave it to me, like on the coffee table  or on top of my bag. and it was true, it did make me relax. I wasn't stressed in the back of my mind that something was going to happen when it come to payment and could focus on being my best, but I noticed, that a lot of people felt uncomfortable with it. no one ever refused but instead of making us both relax it seemed to put clients off.  

When I worked for myself I started just having to trust them and do it at the end.  I have about one person a year try and stiff me with the money, its always guys that have cum super quick and then they don't want to stay the hour and think they can give half the rate, start a negotiation,  or 'forgot cash in my wallet, can I go to ATM and come back?'  I have had to walk people to an ATM I don't trust them to come back. 

It's a super violating feeling when you still have their cum inside you and they are trying to fuck you again. 

The other one, and I forget how many times this has happened, but they 'forget' to pay and go to walk out and just not pay. 'oh sorry I completely forgot I hadn't paid yet! I was so relaxed and it all felt so natural!' yeah right! that happens I would say maybe one a month where I have to stand in front of the door. I'm sure it could happen accidentally like @Nue2thegame but it happens way too often for it to always be. When it's a regular you know for sure it's an accident. 

The best middle ground is to put the money somewhere the provider can see it.  I don't even count it until they are gone. 

 

[Occasional]

1 hour ago, Nue2thegame said:

I’m comfortable either way. A while ago, in the post encounter bliss, both the provider and I forgot about payment. A frantic phone call 20 minutes later from him culminated in my turning around and going back in very heavy traffic. I was a return customer and he was more amused than annoyed but I was embarrassed. Now I usually take the envelope out of my pocket at the outset and I think they’re often relieved to see it. If I’m less than delighted, I won’t be back. What does really turn me off, is to watch them count it. 

I actually ask the provider to count it "to save any misunderstanding". With modern plastic banknotes that can stick together, it's as much for my benefit as theirs!

 

[DunwoodyGuy]

I pay after and place the folded-up money in the masseur's hands--often with a tip added to the agreed-upon amount--look him in the eyes and say "Thank you." Once, a very Zen-like practitioner squeezed my hands when I gave him the money and said, "May this come back to each of us a million times over." I thought that was lovely. I tried to say it myself a few times, but all I got out was "I wish this was a million dollars because that's how much you're worth." Not as spiritual, but I think it was appreciated.

Oh--and I always turn away to finish dressing after I give him the money. If he looks or counts it,  I don't want to know. More often than not, he just puts in in his pocket or the dresser.

[pubic_assistance]

I have gotten into the habit of leaving the money out somewhere as I get undressed before the session.

There has been more than one occasion where I got caught up in friendly banter after a meet up, and totally forgot I wasn't at just a hook up. Nearly forgot to pay !

So to prevent that embarrassing moment, I just leave the cash in full view. Tipping I always wait until AFTER, since tipping is based on above and beyond service.

Edited December 11 by pubic_assistance
grammar

[+ KensingtonHomo]

I only pay in cash if the provider insists. It's not me being a dick. I rarely carry cash and don't live near a bank branch. I'm seldom asked to pay in advance and - as others have noted - those who do ask are generally about to short you. A benefit of paying electronically is that I can tip with ease. If we're doing cash, I put it in an envelope and leave it on the counter or coffee table so we're both aware that it's there. Once or twice with a regular masseur the bliss has led to me forgetting, but the minute I remember or he reminds me, I send over the money. 

[sjmuktop]

This all depends on how the escort prefers to do business.

I have a number of regular escorts I've been seeing for several years, they know me well, and so paying at the end of the session is no issue. 

Often if it's someone new I'm seeing, they ask for the payment up front. That's no issue for me, I don't mind. If I see them a second time or if they become a new regular, then payment is often no longer asked for upfront, because trust has been well established.

All that said, I have a couple of regulars who I've been seeing for a few years now, who still like payment to made at the start of the session (despite knowing me well); it's obviously just the way they prefer to do things. 

I know there are many guys on this site who say they don't approve of paying upfront, but honestly, it makes no odds to me. Many escorts here in the UK accept bank transfers now, and this is increasingly how I pay them, often before even I arrive - I just zip the cash over to them via my banking app as I'm on my way to meet them (you often learn their real names this way, though in my own personal experience, once you know an escort well or even have met him a couple of times, he has no qualms revealing his real name. I know the real names of all my regulars).

[hotfunnow]

I hate the idea of paying first for a session.   It usually sets the tone off to a bad start and I almost expect a bad session..  thats just my experience.   When a massuer asks for money upfront I usually decline and move on. In my exp its never worked well. It doesnt give me the opportunity to tip.  I also get it from the massuer side they have probably been ripped before.  

We've combined this new thread created in the Spa with an existing thread in the Questions about Hiring forum. CoM Moderators.

[mrkileen]

14 minutes ago, hotfunnow said:

I hate the idea of paying first for a session.   It usually sets the tone off to a bad start and I almost expect a bad session..  thats just my experience.   When a massuer asks for money upfront I usually decline and move on. In my exp its never worked well. It doesnt give me the opportunity to tip.  I also get it from the massuer side they have probably been ripped before.  

You could always tip after. And how are you paying? Through Venmo or PayPal? What if your bank blocks the transaction for some reason? 

Are you talking about a new provider or someone you've seen before. They dont know you. You have to pay for Uber before they show up. Same goes for seeing a movie. You purchase the tickets first. I always pay providers upfront that way we can both relax and enjoy the session. If they're too polite to ask and it's in the back of their mind the entire time whether you're going to try to stiff them or not, you might not enjoy the session as much. 

I've never understood this logic, you seek someone out, want them to accommodate you for a service and not pay them for it? Seems like it's all about you with no consideration for the provider. 

The good clients pay upfront, no problem l, that way the provider feels at ease and can concentrate on you without worrying. 

What if you said after the fact that you didn't have it, or if your bank blocked a money transfer on one of those apps, are they just stiffed for the money? Not a successful business model, nothing in it for the provider if you can't understand they want to safeguard their business. 

Edited 18 hours ago by mrkileen

[realestateguy75]

18 minutes ago, hotfunnow said:

I hate the idea of paying first for a session.   It usually sets the tone off to a bad start and I almost expect a bad session..  thats just my experience.   When a massuer asks for money upfront I usually decline and move on. In my exp its never worked well. It doesnt give me the opportunity to tip.  I also get it from the massuer side they have probably been ripped before.  

Pay prior to session to ensure everything goes smoothly. 

[Rudynate]

I used to care, but I don't anymore.  I'm only interested in what's convenient for both parties:  deposit? fine, how much.  Payment app? Fine, which one?  Advance payment? Fine, when?  etc. etc.

[+ SidewaysDM]

As a client, I find paying in advance, by Venmo, seems to an easy, safe and convenient option for the provider and myself. I also include a tip with my payment in advance. In the rare case, that your provider doesn’t recall being paid, you have all the information and details on your Venmo account to prove you have paid in advance. It makes for a more relaxing and fun experience, with the payment out of the way. 

[OvrwghtQT]

Only one provider so far has demanded payment from me before the session. And then when I met again the 2nd time, he said it was fine to give it to him after. 

[+ JamesB]

Am I the only one who finds it interesting that most long-standing accounts/members tend to say they’ll pay after, while most newer ones usually insist on paying upfront?

[hotfunnow]

Thanks everyone for your input on this..  I do agree that newer users ask for money upfront while more experienced users are ok with paying after.  I am a repeat customer and have nevwr had an issue with paying after especially with trusted massuers escorts.  

I have paid upfront before and am usually disappointed after the services are done bc the massages suck or are mediocre.  I still pay the full amount but leave disappointed........

I understand as and its a 2 way streak though and a risk for them and me.  Im not in the game to gyp myself or the massuer eacort..