Are some potential clients sometimes too sensitive?

[marylander1940]

 

 

 

I don't see anything wrong with this conversation... This escort friend of mine told me this RM profile was based in Charlotte, a place he wants to visit soon, he also doesn't have a car and many places in Gaithersburg are hard to reach. 

Why the client got mad so easily?

Did he doge the bullet avoiding meeting a difficult client? 

 

 

Edited February 18 by marylander1940
Adding screenshots

[+ APPLE1]

I don't get "anger" from the client. I more envision frustration. The impression I get, having the bennifit of the back story from you, is that the provider's first 2 lines were 1 thought, but because messages can sometimes get interrupted if the other party keys faster or a senders connection is slow, the client's message came in between the provider's complete thought, and becauseof this the client felt like the provider may not have been paying attention to what he was saying.

Overall, I think the client could have explored more options for what/how the provider was trying to communicate. But, I also have to say, I think it would have served the provider better to give the client the explanation he gave you right from the start instead of just asking for the where and when details.

Sometimes one word, or a few words, work just fine in messaging, and sometimes, to make sure you're not misinterpreted, it helps to write a paragraph before you click send.

Edited February 18 by APPLE1

[marylander1940]

27 minutes ago, APPLE1 said:

I don't get "anger" from the client. I more envision frustration. The impression I get, having the bennifit of the back story from you, is that the provider's first 2 lines were 1 thought, but because messages can sometimes get interrupted if the other party keys faster or a senders connection is slow, the client's message came in between the provider's complete thought, and becauseof this the client felt like the provider may not have been paying attention to what he was saying.

Overall, I think the client could have explored more options for what/how the provider was trying to communicate. But, I also have to say, I think it would have served the provider better to give the client the explanation he gave you right from the start instead of just asking for the where and when details.

Sometimes one word, or a few words, work just fine in messaging, and sometimes, to make sure you're not misinterpreted, it helps to write a paragraph before you click send.

The client didn't even say he's in Gaithersburg now. 

 

"Where and when", if the escort doesn't take a hold of the conversation specially by text and get the details that matter God knows how long it would take to make plans. 

no need for the potential client to be passive-aggressive and overreact. 

 

 

[+ DrownedBoy]

When you look at the exchange as a whole, I get the sense that:

1. The client initial texted you without the intention of ever hiring you. "In a hotel for a week" is a large time slot, and I'm guessing he used that as a lure.

2. For some reason, he regretted bothering you with free sexting and stopped.

[marylander1940]

23 minutes ago, DrownedBoy said:

When you look at the exchange as a whole, I get the sense that:

1. The client initial texted you without the intention of ever hiring you. "In a hotel for a week" is a large time slot, and I'm guessing he used that as a lure.

2. For some reason, he regretted bothering you with free sexting and stopped.

I'll pass a link to this thread with the all the feedback to this escort later. 

Thank you!

[+ APPLE1]

I don't think the client being in Gaithersburg now, or later, was the stumbling block. The  client talked about Gaithersburg, and when the provider asked about Charlotte, the client was unsettled. Possibly thinking things like 'I said Gaithersburg, but he brings up Charlotte. Is he not paying attention to what I tell him? Is he too high to focus? And now he wants to know exactly where I am in Gaithersburg, before we have even gotten to any other details. I am feeling uneasy.'

I am not saying the client communicated well, or should have been weirded out. I am saying, like  many client/provider texts we hear about, both of them them could have 1) communicated more clearly, and 2) taken a minute to explore what the other meant besides the very first thought that came into their head.

Edited February 18 by APPLE1

[Guest]

I think the client just got cold feet, and was attempting, respectfully, to back out.

[marylander1940]

5 hours ago, APPLE1 said:

I don't think the client being in Gaithersburg now, or later, was the stumbling block. The  client talked about Gaithersburg, and when the provider asked about Charlotte, the client was unsettled. Possibly thinking things like 'I said Gaithersburg, but he brings up Charlotte. Is he not paying attention to what I tell him? Is he too high to focus? And now he wants to know exactly where I am in Gaithersburg, before we have even gotten to any other details. I am feeling uneasy.'

I am not saying the client communicated well, or should have been weirded out. I am saying, like  many client/provider texts we hear about, both of them them could have 1) communicated more clearly, and 2) taken a minute to explore what the other meant besides the very first thought that came into their head.

The client profile (which he showed me) is based in Charlotte and the escort will be there soon.

I do understand what you said about communication, in the era of texting folks can get upset easily. 

[marylander1940]

1 hour ago, Km411 said:

I think the client just got cold feet, and was attempting, respectfully, to back out.

I do think the response was a way to say: "have a nice day" in a sarcastic way.

[NJF]

Both questions from the provider appeared a little intrusive. Where the potential client live is irrelevant. And the next question is the exact location of the hotel. A closeted client will very likely walk away after facing these questions.

[DWnyc]

The provider tone is kind of “i can see through your deception and I’ll demonstrate it by asking questions that are almost rhetorical” 

nothing here generally that’s newsworthy though surely …

[Guest]

You can read into any tone you’d like—sarcastic, respectful; intrusive, direct; etc. To an earlier point, more words are sometimes needed to effectively communicate. But I still think the client just got cold feet.

[soloyo215]

Short answer, yes. Some clients are too sensitive. What I believe is up for discussion is the reason for it. Some people are not fully confident about hiring. Some struggle with all the feelings that come with hiring an escort. The reply from the client might have nothing to do with neither the location nor the provider. Who knows what's going on inside the head of that person. The possibilities of the feelings behind the reaction are endless.

[marylander1940]

9 hours ago, DWnyc said:

The provider tone is kind of “i can see through your deception and I’ll demonstrate it by asking questions that are almost rhetorical” 

nothing here generally that’s newsworthy though surely …

Rhetorical? I see he was trying to get to the point.

 

[marylander1940]

Another example:

 

[DWnyc]

Is the real question here in providing feedback on how to communicate (with clients) the the provider?

Not enough info here.

but I’d say from examples he needs to let the clients vibe come through more clearly before he asserts his interpretation and tone which might come across as “don’t waste my time” but is more likely “I don’t understand …”

think of one party speaking porn movie dialog to someone who is taking everything literally and when he does that it doesn’t make sense so he asks for clarification and it kills the mood.

that being said if the mood is free sexting that’s no good either.

 

[Jarrod_Uncut]

On 2/18/2024 at 3:14 PM, marylander1940 said:

The client didn't even say he's in Gaithersburg now. 

 

"Where and when", if the escort doesn't take a hold of the conversation specially by text and get the details that matter God knows how long it would take to make plans. 

no need for the potential client to be passive-aggressive and overreact. 

 

 

I’m still trying to figure out: what color bubble is the client and which is the escort?? I assume the client is the one saying he doesn’t want to waste his time?

On 2/18/2024 at 10:01 PM, marylander1940 said:

I do think the response was a way to say: "have a nice day" in a sarcastic way.

Yeah that’s passive aggressive client behavior I see often…(I’m in blue)

On 2/19/2024 at 5:54 AM, soloyo215 said:

Short answer, yes. Some clients are too sensitive. What I believe is up for discussion is the reason for it. Some people are not fully confident about hiring. Some struggle with all the feelings that come with hiring an escort. The reply from the client might have nothing to do with neither the location nor the provider. Who knows what's going on inside the head of that person. The possibilities of the feelings behind the reaction are endless.

My vote is YES: and I was going to post a topic about this exact thing but, I promised I’d make less threads and just respond to others, but it’s like practically revealing itself😂 

My topic was going to be: THE FRAGILE CLIENT EGO. It’s a very real thing. I’ve dealt with it twice in the past week: 

 

Then a couple messages later:

 

And I’m paying $49 and $79 a month to deal with this shit? This is an obscene. I’ve been dealing with shit like this ALL YEAR. People wonder why I ask deposits and charge to be contacted: because 90% of tripe from RM is all nonsense and flakes, I can’t run a biz that requires SPENDING MONEY on hotels, travel, etc. relying that unreliable, dishonest fake clients are going to show up. 

I’ve made sure going forward in my ads I make it very very clear what’s to be expected, and I’m not taking excuses because it’s all in writing! I feel like I’ma teacher of middle school students some days!!! We need to be getting paid an actual salary, this commission shit isn’t working 🤦🏾‍♂️ 

Edited February 24 by Jarrod_Uncut

[Jarrod_Uncut]

On top of that, many clients come off dismissive right off the bat. Instead of compromising and discussing an option, they immediately resort to passive aggressive departure. That’s a sign of a weak, yet controlling man who is afraid of any level of conflict.

That’s why I told RentMen and RentMasseur: I’m tired of this shit. For the money we pay to them, they should be doing more to micromanage these guys. It’s too much work. If someone is going to not read a profile, at least have the decency to follow what a provider asks for. Too many of these guys expect far too much upfront, but do very little to convey they are willing to put the effort.

[jmichaeliii]

7 hours ago, Jarrod_Uncut said:

On top of that, many clients come off dismissive right off the bat. Instead of compromising and discussing an option, they immediately resort to passive aggressive departure. That’s a sign of a weak, yet controlling man who is afraid of any level of conflict.

That’s why I told RentMen and RentMasseur: I’m tired of this shit. For the money we pay to them, they should be doing more to micromanage these guys. It’s too much work. If someone is going to not read a profile, at least have the decency to follow what a provider asks for. Too many of these guys expect far too much upfront, but do very little to convey they are willing to put the effort.

I'd be cool with what you are asking for.  I've been on the other side of this and have been no shown too.  I only asked for a phone conversation once because someone was brand new to the area with no reviews and I was trying to determine if he was real.  He's still working in Philly but impossible to communicate with.

You are showing you are serious about your business and Iike that.   I hate time wasters.

[soloyo215]

9 hours ago, Jarrod_Uncut said:

On top of that, many clients come off dismissive right off the bat. Instead of compromising and discussing an option, they immediately resort to passive aggressive departure. That’s a sign of a weak, yet controlling man who is afraid of any level of conflict.

That’s why I told RentMen and RentMasseur: I’m tired of this shit. For the money we pay to them, they should be doing more to micromanage these guys. It’s too much work. If someone is going to not read a profile, at least have the decency to follow what a provider asks for. Too many of these guys expect far too much upfront, but do very little to convey they are willing to put the effort.

In my experience, that is just all across the entire gay universe, not just in this industry. Dismissive, undecided, full-of-it assholes are found everywhere in any industry that is service oriented. What I'd suggest is that is a person has wasted your time in the past, don't continue wasting your time entertaining him or trying to make a point. There's absolutely no gain on your part by doing that. Personally, I don't have to have the last word in every interaction. I can ghost, ignore and move on without having to explain things to people.

That same thing happens in dating and trying to meet people online. For example, last year I met a person online who was going to coincide with me in Barcelona. I proposed to meet and share a drink at a bar. I thought it will be great to meet a friend in person during vacation. We agreed on a date/time/place to do that (he actually suggested the place). The time was 10pm. I showed up at 10, he was nowhere to be found. I still had a great time, I shared with other people I met right there. Left the place about an hour later. The next day (get this), he told me that he was there at 8pm and left at 9pm, and went back to the place at 11:30pm. I'm sure he's a grown up man, so I don't have to explain to him what 10pm means or how time works. I just moved on. When he saw no reply from me, a day or two later, he sent me another message wishing me a good trip. Who knows what was going through his mind that he decided to purposely stand me up like that. Don't know, don't care, the important part is not to waste time entertaining people's games.

Another time was some guy I was dating way back when. I had something to do on a Saturday at 2pm. I told him that we can talk before 2pm or after 4pm, that I wasn't available between 2pm-4pm. That was before the popularity of mobile devices, so I had an answering maching at home. When I came back home at 4pm, there were about ten messages from him, getting nastier as they progressed, and they were all left between 2pm and 4pm. That last of those messages said things like "Why are you doing this to me?" Again, I didn't waste time entertainning nonsense. I was done with him right then and there.

Our word and your time are valuable. I personally do not get involved in arguments over other people's nonsense. Not having the last word is not as important as my own wellbeing or my valuable time.

[marylander1940]

@Jarrod_Uncut the escort sent me the screenshot of the text messages. Therefore, he's the one on the right and the client (timewaster) is the one on the left texting him. 

[Jarrod_Uncut]

14 hours ago, marylander1940 said:

@Jarrod_Uncut the escort sent me the screenshot of the text messages. Therefore, he's the one on the right and the client (timewaster) is the one on the left texting him. 

Yeah, typical weak yet controlling client…not wanting to do the work to communicate, and throwing his toys 🧸 on the floor. He should have better explained his situation.
 

But then again, that’s why I am doing consultation fees, deposits and not showing my number as much. Dealing with that a few times, over a few days and not getting anything to show at the end of the week: and you lose your patience very quick…

Edited February 25 by Jarrod_Uncut

[ShortCutie7]

On 2/24/2024 at 9:07 AM, soloyo215 said:

 

Another time was some guy I was dating way back when. I had something to do on a Saturday at 2pm. I told him that we can talk before 2pm or after 4pm, that I wasn't available between 2pm-4pm. That was before the popularity of mobile devices, so I had an answering maching at home. When I came back home at 4pm, there were about ten messages from him, getting nastier as they progressed, and they were all left between 2pm and 4pm. That last of those messages said things like "Why are you doing this to me?" Again, I didn't waste time entertainning nonsense. I was done with him right then and there.

 

That’s not even a gay community thing, that’s people in general miscommunicating and hearing what they want to.  

Edited February 25 by ShortCutie7
Taking out my irrelevant example

[Jarrod_Uncut]

16 hours ago, ShortCutie7 said:

That’s not even a gay community thing, that’s people in general miscommunicating and hearing what they want to.  

Well that and just someone very obsessive and maybe into mind games if they called between a time that soloyo was busy. Then again, if they were “dating”, it sounds like they met more than once? 
 

Idk, hell I could name a million situations where a potential possibility failed to communicate properly, both in and out of sex work. Like saying goes, it takes 2 to tango. If 2 people really want to make something happen, they’ll do so.

Sometimes it’s not about who said what or didn’t say what, miscommunications etc etc. Like in one of my examples above, the other party had the option to put more effort into planning the booking. 

[Vulgarii]

Some clients are really sensitive when you don't respond right away. 

 

After literally 5 mins from receiving their text, they have told me too late or they booked someone else. Really? They couldn't wait 5 fucking minutes? And I can read their texts without opening them and giving them a read receipt. So oh well, my loss, they're my offerings to the other poor souls in the game.