Anyone feel like a lot of providers are rude via text?

[INQUIRER1]

I've texted various providers who seem nice on their Rent men pages, but when I text them they seem very curt and almost annoyed. I also try to be very polite and respectful of their time (not having endless conversations).

[+ José Soplanucas]

How old are you? Could this be a generational gap?

[seattlebottom]

Think about the number of texts they're getting and the knowledge that maybe one or two will result in an actual appointment.   To me it's the same as calling a business and being asked to hold while they assist someone else.

[+ José Soplanucas]

1 minute ago, seattlebottom said:

Think about the number of texts they're getting and the knowledge that maybe one or two will result in an actual appointment.   To me it's the same as calling a business and being asked to hold while they assist someone else.

Absolutely. And also think that texting has evolved into an etiquette where laconism and straight to the point are highly appreciated. 

[dbar123]

Some people text with an attitude. Don’t take it personally. Everyone’s busy these days 

[pubic_assistance]

Personally I don't understand why so many providers insist on conversation being moved immediately from website messaging to text.

Seems that it would be less annoying to have the basic questions worked out on the site messenger before you end up with dozens of losers texting with you in your phone  and asking for close-ups of your dick or asshole.

[dcbbvers]

Have to say the curt responses are a huge turn off and will almost always make me check out other providers. For $300 I sort of expect responses that are more than one word. Its fine when texting friends but not when someone is looking to drop some nice money on time with you. 

[Guest leftbench23]

Even more annoying when you provide all of your info, stats, and availability in the initial text that they barely read!

[Jamie21]

9 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

Personally I don't understand why so many providers insist on conversation being moved immediately from website messaging to text.

Seems that it would be less annoying to have the basic questions worked out on the site messenger before you end up with dozens of losers texting with you in your phone  and asking for close-ups of your dick or asshole.

Most of the basic questions that get asked are already answered in the advert or website. It gets quite tiring to answer the same questions by text. 
I get “hi what’s your rate?”….”when are you available?”. I get a lot of messages like that. So sometimes the answer “please see my website” might seem curt, but it’s really just to avoid lengthy exchanges by text.

Also, if the first question is “what’s your rate” the likelihood is it’s too expensive for him. You learn to avoid wasting too much time on that kind of thing. 

[Chancealot]

Odd to me that most of the answers here “defend” not being the things one would associate with “selling” which is what the providers should be doing if they want customers 

Something is off 

i tend to agree with the poster and it can be a turn off as it’s the first impression from someone you think you’d like to meet 

[+ Coolwave35]

I mean no shade with this post. I think in any business, the salesman learns to weed out the tire kickers and time wasters, and lose patience when their radar blips. 
 

I’d be curious to know the ratio of how many providers the OP reaches out to “inquire” versus how many providers he actually hires and has a session with.  
 

Some of us on the boards have different experiences with setting up a session. Over the years I’ve surmised that those of us that close the deal 90% of the time have a different experience than those that hit up, audition, engage and evaluate dozens and dozens and various escorts before deciding on a hire. 
 

When I’m looking to hire, I go in on the one escort tickling my fancy and he has to do or say something incredibly outrageous to lose my business. That’s just me. 

[ChasingGirth]

I think since a text is emotionless per se unless you use smileys some responses can appear very dry. 

But In fact it could only be our own interpretation. 

I like a guy that will engage me after I ask a basic question such as rate and availability.

if the guy respond to me and immediately asks me what I am into and what turns me on, then it’s a good sign.  
 

I want someone interested on what I’m looking for. 

And I agree with others, communication for me is better to track on the website. I feel like that guys that I engage on the website are more responsive rather than via text. 

[+ glutes]

It is hard to get tone in text, buuuuuutt:

I have seen provider Grecos several times, and in my last text to arrange a meeting I asked if it was OK to call him.

His response, "I am not here to make friends. This is a job."

How about just being friendly?

That all said, I know he has recently been "released"  by his famous song writer and performer /  sugar daddy, he may be very angry. Now living in the Hollywood flats.

Edited January 28, 2023 by glutes

[Beancounter]

I see my regular guy once a month.  This guy is extremely popular, well-thought of and very much in demand.  We actually discussed this very topic after one of our sessions.  He whipped out his phone and told me that he received 50-plus text messages in the 2 hours we were together.   He also indicated this was the norm and that while texts slowed down during overnight hours he’d still wake up to a ton of messages.  I guess the point I’m trying to impart on Forum members is that it may not be humanly possible to rely to all texts with a lengthy text exchange.

 

These guys have a life outside of escorting, too.  They have their daily routines as we all do.  Put yourself in their shoes and how would you react to hundreds of emails on a daily basis?  
 

As an aside…..I learned a long time ago that the paltry $300 I fork over for a session is peanuts to the more popular providers.  He may be the center of my universe but I can guarantee you I’m not the center of his.  I’m a financial transaction, nothing more.  

[Jamie21]

3 hours ago, Chancealot said:

Odd to me that most of the answers here “defend” not being the things one would associate with “selling” which is what the providers should be doing if they want customers 

Something is off 

i tend to agree with the poster and it can be a turn off as it’s the first impression from someone you think you’d like to meet 

No excuse for being rude, but not engaging fully with some enquiries is a way of weeding out the time wasters, window shoppers and those who expect a ‘deal’. 

 

 

[Scott Virginian]

Time management and weeding the window shoppers may well be driving some of the brevity, entirely possible.

IMO there are some generational aspects.  Gen X writes texts like emails, full sentences with punctuation.  Get Z is syllables, abbreviations, no punctuation.  I've heard Gen Z'ers say that a period on the end of a text stresses them out, they think the texter is upset with them.  It's like their version of TYPING IN ALL CAPS (which grandma and grandpa do without even noticing...).  Gen X gets the shudders at the mere suggestion that they not. put. a. period. on. a. sentence.  

Edited January 28, 2023 by Scott Virginian
spelling

[Trick]

4 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

Most of the basic questions that get asked are already answered in the advert or website. It gets quite tiring to answer the same questions by text. 
I get “hi what’s your rate?”….”when are you available?”. I get a lot of messages like that. So sometimes the answer “please see my website” might seem curt, but it’s really just to avoid lengthy exchanges by text.

Also, if the first question is “what’s your rate” the likelihood is it’s too expensive for him. You learn to avoid wasting too much time on that kind of thing. 

This will only work if the provider is providing accurate information on their ad. 

My first question is always “Are you in (my city)?”  Some providers are not actually in the cities their ad shows.  Even with dates shown,  many times they are not the actual dates they are visiting.   

Rentmen does not show the rates so they have to be asked for.  

As for “I Am Into,” many providers check all the boxes so it has to be verified what they are really into.

[+ Coolwave35]

2 hours ago, Beancounter said:

he received 50-plus text messages in the 2 hours we were together.   He also indicated this was the norm and that while texts slowed down during overnight hours he’d still wake up to a ton of messages. 

Early in my hiring career I spent a week with a provider in Orlando.  As part of our negotiations, he asked for a few hours a day to manage his business leads. I thought it unreasonable so I pushed back. He explained that if he went dark for 7 days he’d lose more income than he was making. I disagreed but understood and relented. 
 

The first three days were eye opening about the number of inquiries he received and how time consuming the management was. Day 4 and 5 he ignored the phone and took a break from it and confessed to feeling burnt out there and wanting to stay present with me. 
 

On day 6 when he checked back in, he jokingly said “you know me by now, why don’t you answer these.” and laughed. I said ooooooo can I?  And he let me. I loved it.  We snuggled up together in bed and I’d craft these riveting responses and bait the hook while he reviewed before I hit send. It was thrilling to confirm appointments with him and I imagined him in all the scenarios he had agreed to with other clients. It was one of the most fun times I have had with a provider. 
 

He complained that the level of kindness and attention I was replying with was unsustainable, and I’d be burned out after a week of answering with such care. I lasted two days. On day 7 as we waited in the airport he gave me another shot.  It was exhausting and lost its magic.  There is a lot of energy coming at hot guys all the time. 

[Jamie21]

5 minutes ago, Coolwave35 said:

Early in my hiring career I spent a week with a provider in Orlando.  As part of our negotiations, he asked for a few hours a day to manage his business leads. I thought it unreasonable so I pushed back. He explained that if he went dark for 7 days he’d lose more income than he was making. I disagreed but understood and relented. 
 

The first three days were eye opening about the number of inquiries he received and how time consuming the management was. Day 4 and 5 he ignored the phone and took a break from it and confessed to feeling burnt out there and wanting to stay present with me. 
 

On day 6 when he checked back in, he jokingly said “you know me by now, why don’t you answer these.” and laughed. I said ooooooo can I?  And he let me. I loved it.  We snuggled up together in bed and I’d craft these riveting responses and bait the hook while he reviewed before I hit send. It was thrilling to confirm appointments with him and I imagined him in all the scenarios he had agreed to with other clients. It was one of the most fun times I have had with a provider. 
 

He complained that the level of kindness and attention I was replying with was unsustainable, and I’d be burned out after a week of answering with such care. I lasted two days. On day 7 as we waited in the airport he gave me another shot.  It was exhausting and lost its magic.  There is a lot of energy coming at hot guys all the time. 

He must have been in high demand! When demand exceeds supply, you put the price up. 

[pubic_assistance]

7 hours ago, Jamie21 said:

Most of the basic questions that get asked are already answered in the advert or website

Well...that isn't always true.

"Ask me" is quite a common component of the rates section. So I am forced to ask . The second most common need to ask is availability to host ( where and when ).

So I don't need to text you if you're too expensive or hosting somewhere inconvenient or working hours that are inconvenient..but that's not always apparent in the ad. So a quick response in messenger keeps me off your text threads on your phone.

Edited January 28, 2023 by pubic_assistance
dropped sentences

[Jamie21]

3 hours ago, pubic_assistance said:

Well...that isn't always true.

"Ask me" is quite a common component of the rates section. So I am forced to ask . The second most common need to ask is availability to host ( where and when ).

So I don't need to text you if you're too expensive or hosting somewhere inconvenient or working hours that are inconvenient..but that's not always apparent in the ad. So a quick response in messenger keeps me off your text threads on your phone.

Yeah I guess in some places guys have to be a bit discreet in their ads, for legal reasons. Must be really annoying. 

[coriolis888]

9 hours ago, arnemgreeves said:

could be a defense mechanism against time wasters. The 

Yes, the imaginary "time waster" label gets used again.    

A product is being sold (escort services).  If more than a few questions are asked by the client concerning details of the potential encounter, the client is labeled a time waster.  

Too often, something is out of sync.  

[+ glutes]

If you don't ask a couple of germane questions of a $300+/hour provider, you aren't doing due diligence.

[coriolis888]

 

-

If you contact to hire an attorney or designer or any other high hourly rate person  (like a provider or escort), and if you get called a "time waster" by the person you are considering hiring, you have to wonder how the person failed to learn basic communication or marketing skills. 

You also have to wonder why you bothered to call such a rude individual.

Statistically, there likely are some time wasters but I do not believe there are as many as claimed by the many "rude" providers falsely alleging their precious time is wasted by people contacting them with useless questions or "time wasting" questions.    

Civility is a two-way street.  

 

Edited January 29, 2023 by coriolis888
spelling

[coriolis888]

53 minutes ago, arnemgreeves said:

If they get that all day, or most of the day, it can fit. Lawyers or tradespeople probably don't get a stack of false contacts per day, and if they did they may get cynical about people contacting them. 

Many professions that rely on advertising get a lot of calls that do not end up resulting in a client being hired. 

It just goes with the territory.  

In our firm, we hire special "secretaries" to screen out" callers that likely would not result in becoming a client of the firm.  However, the secretary is not rude in the screening process.  

A lone individual, like an escort, having to screen calls and messages has a more difficult and time consuming job. 

However, to categorize many potential clients as "time wasters" is like throwing away money and a good possible client.