Escort I hired is a Lawyer

[Lazarus]

23 minutes ago, Kevin Slater said:

Please do not.  Identifying a provider's day job would likely violate the no personal info rule.

Kevin Slater (qua moderator)

I was joking. 

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

3 hours ago, Lucky said:

Because it's so lame?

That usual dose of Geritol hit hard tonight, eh?

Edited August 8, 2022 by BenjaminNicholas

[+ purplekow]

I do not know why one would assume this story is apocryphal.  I know at least two providers who are lawyers and one who is a doctor and another who is an accountant and another a civil engineer.   Some people can multi task and  if he has the skills, why not.   

 

[Guest]

There was an escort I hired some 30 years ago who was a practicing lawyer at the time (he's never had a face photo in his escort ads). All those years later, he still has an ad, and still claims to be under 50, though he must be getting close to 60 at this time. Still using decades-old body photos in his ads. I wonder what he really looks like now. Of course, I would never think of hiring him as a lawyer. 

[+ WilliamM]

4 minutes ago, Unicorn said:

There was an escort I hired some 30 years ago who was a practicing lawyer at the time (he's never had a face photo in his escort ads). All those years later, he still has an ad, and still claims to be under 50, though he must be getting close to 60 at this time. Still using decades-old body photos in his ads. I wonder what he really looks like now. Of course, I would never think of hiring him as a lawyer. 

I mostly agree,. But we only live once.

Cary Grant is just one example of a aging stud

 

 

 

[+ DynamicUno]

23 hours ago, boredboy96 said:

That's the thing. I have a meeting with a partner at their firm tomorrow morning. 

Then it's best to avoid engaging the firm.  I suppose it's a moot point now but I hope you were able to back out of the meeting with the partner.  

The question of whether you should mention it to your guy is a bit debatable.  There's an arguement for staying silent since you found it by chance.  On the other hand, it might be worth mentioning you happened across his photo when you were looking at law firms and avoided his to maintain his discretion.  If he's trying to keep his night job discreet, he may need to consider if his social profiles like facebook can make it easy to make the connection and if someone can make trouble for him that way.

[dutchal]

22 hours ago, WestGuy said:

Personally speaking (and as a lawyer myself) I would say do not go to the meeting and find a different law firm to represent you. Not sure where you live, but I live in the NYC area and there are LOTS of lawyers to choose from. You might also consider the effect you may have on your companion. He has only met you once and doesn't know what kind of a person you are. If you eventually establish a relationship with him and you are comfortable with each other, he might disclose his "day job" to you. Since he is not aware that you know about his "day" job, seeing you in the office would likely engender a bad reaction in him.  He might be concerned that his sex work would become known to his firm, which could result in his dismissal  and possibly sanctioning by the state bar. I think you will do both of you a big favor by foregoing the appointment with his law firm and not mentioning it to him at your next meet up.

As another NYC lawyer, I fully agree.  I hope to high heaven that you did not go through with the meeting.

[Beancounter]

I’m of the opinion this thread should be locked and closed to further postings.  Enough people have posted intelligent guidance for the OP to follow.  

[dutchal]

51 minutes ago, Beancounter said:

I’m of the opinion this thread should be locked and closed to further postings.  Enough people have posted intelligent guidance for the OP to follow.  

Further discussion of what actually happened would still be appropriate.

[samhexum]

On 8/7/2022 at 2:44 PM, boredboy96 said:

I hired very attractive and fit escort last night. We had such a great time. He's young, hot, smart, funny, and a great listener.

I am involved in a legal issues and was looking at law firm websites this morning. His picture came up as a lawyer at a firm. I plan on hiring him again and again, but I don't know how it will be with me knowing about his "real life." 

Advice? 

 

On 8/7/2022 at 6:46 PM, BenjaminNicholas said:

I'm disappointed no one's gone for the obvious 'Well, he can fuck you and then REALLY fuck you' lawyer punchline. 

No jokes about the quality of his briefs?

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

6 minutes ago, samhexum said:

No jokes about the quality of his briefs?

You win.

👏👏👏

[boredboy96]

OP here. I canceled before our meeting saying that another firm decided to take the case the night before. I only spoke to the secretary and she seemed to want to be anywhere but work anyway so it worked out. 

He does not have an ad, it is just word of mouth from existing clientele. 

Also, I do know of two other lawyers who are escorts. One quit law and does videos, the other has a solo practice I think. 

[BananaBagel]

2 hours ago, boredboy96 said:

OP here. I canceled before our meeting saying that another firm decided to take the case the night before. I only spoke to the secretary and she seemed to want to be anywhere but work anyway so it worked out. 

He does not have an ad, it is just word of mouth from existing clientele. 

Also, I do know of two other lawyers who are escorts. One quit law and does videos, the other has a solo practice I think. 

Appreciate you coming back to tell us how it worked out. 

[+ glutes]

Gosh,  I love reading fiction.

[MassageDrew]

I may be late to this conversation but don't even bother saying anything if you like your experience with him. Most providers don't like clients knowing about their private lives, unless the information is directly coming from them. Giving him info about what you know about him may make him think you're stalking him regardless of how you found it 

[coriolis888]

On 8/7/2022 at 1:07 PM, boredboy96 said:

That's the thing. I have a meeting with a partner at their firm tomorrow morning. 

You might not know that many law firms have access to "Lexus Nexus" a system/entity data company that will let you find out EVERYTHING about anyone.  You and your affairs could be made available to someone you used as a provider. 

Most law firms pay even new hires a decent salary.  I am curious why a young guy making a good salary would risk being an escort during his off duty time from his law firm employer. 

If you use the same firm as the provider for your legal work, and if something goes wrong with the provider relationship, you could find yourself in a very difficult and/or embarrassing situation. 

For your future well being, you will be wiser to select a different law firm.

Good luck on what ever you do.     

[maninsoma]

16 hours ago, MassageDrew said:

I may be late to this conversation but don't even bother saying anything if you like your experience with him. Most providers don't like clients knowing about their private lives, unless the information is directly coming from them. Giving him info about what you know about him may make him think you're stalking him regardless of how you found it 

I understand that reaction, but a few times I've told providers how easy it was for me to learn too much about them by just searching for their phone number and suggested it would be better for them to use a different phone number for escorting than they use in their personal life.  I don't think it's stalking someone to search their phone number just to see if you can find information related to their work as a provider.  Just as you wrote, however, I've more typically received a response that I did something wrong versus thanking me for pointing out that they are compromising their privacy by the use of a single phone number.  I can at least hope that after the irritation wore off that my information was useful to them.

[LookingAround]

You’d be surprised how many guys I’ve hired on the clock had law degrees and were members of the bar. Only a small number advertised. 

[KrisParr]

5 hours ago, maninsoma said:

I understand that reaction, but a few times I've told providers how easy it was for me to learn too much about them by just searching for their phone number and suggested it would be better for them to use a different phone number for escorting than they use in their personal life.  I don't think it's stalking someone to search their phone number just to see if you can find information related to their work as a provider.  Just as you wrote, however, I've more typically received a response that I did something wrong versus thanking me for pointing out that they are compromising their privacy by the use of a single phone number.  I can at least hope that after the irritation wore off that my information was useful to them.

I recently had a terrific session with a provider. Prior to the meet, I searched his phone number and immediately found his real name. And of course he has an active social media page with pictures of his family, his friends, etc. all going back several years. I suppose the somewhat satisfaction was knowing he wasn’t a flake and the extra photos added to the anticipation- a very handsome dude. Anyhow, I refrained from telling him how easy it was to find him. And we met at his place - kind of weird knowing in advance what his bedroom looked like. First time for everything, I guess.  

[+ glutes]

2 hours ago, KrisParr said:

. Anyhow, I refrained from telling him how easy it was to find him. And we met at his place - kind of weird knowing in advance what his bedroom looked like. First time for everything, I guess.  

Kris, how'd you ever do with the handsome guy at the gym that was making eyes at'cha?

[MassageDrew]

12 hours ago, maninsoma said:

I understand that reaction, but a few times I've told providers how easy it was for me to learn too much about them by just searching for their phone number and suggested it would be better for them to use a different phone number for escorting than they use in their personal life.  I don't think it's stalking someone to search their phone number just to see if you can find information related to their work as a provider.  Just as you wrote, however, I've more typically received a response that I did something wrong versus thanking me for pointing out that they are compromising their privacy by the use of a single phone number.  I can at least hope that after the irritation wore off that my information was useful to them.

You made a valid point. But how you see it as being helpful might be perceived as unwelcome info about his personal life. Haven't you had to make a decision about a friend? You know something they should know but it's better to walk away from it? That's this kind of situation. Just enjoy your sessions with him and leave it at that. The fact that you're thinking about telling him how easy it was to find his info isn't helping your case. He will not see it as "Omg, all my info is online?" Rather, he's going to think more about why you're trying to find info about him though that wasn't your original intent. You're trying to be helpful, I get it. Sometimes good intentions cause more damage than fix them. Maybe he cannot afford another line or he's okay with using his personal line. Just leave it alone.

[Love2GetMassaged]

I'm a lawyer (in California) and I've been a managing partner at two firms, and for what its worth, when I was in law school many years ago, I received the award for the highest grade in the school in Legal Ethics.  I cannot speak to how the State Bar (or the law in general) would deal with this in other states, but there are definitely some issues of concern here.

As far as having an ongoing sexual relationship, the California Rules of Professional Conduct are pretty clear:  CRPC 1.8.10 says:  "A lawyer shall not engage in sexual relations with a current client who is not the lawyer’s spouse or registered domestic partner, unless a consensual sexual relationship existed between them when the lawyer-client relationship commenced. (b) For purposes of this rule, “sexual relations” means sexual intercourse or the touching of an intimate part of another person* for the purpose of sexual arousal, gratification, or abuse."  (Interestingly, however, unlike many rules, before the State Bar will open an investigation, they have to ascertain whether that would pose a hardship on the client."  So, technically, because you were screwing before hiring him or his firm, the relationship could continue.  However... (and there's always a "however" with lawyers) one could argue that there was never a consensual relationship, because under California law, one cannot enforce a contract for an illegal act, and prostitution is illegal in the US, save for a few licensed brothels in Nevada in rural counties.  Furthermore, since prostitution - under the rather archaic and puritan laws in the US - is considered a crime of moral turpitude, discovery of this information could absolutely lead to disciplinary action by the State Bar, ranging from a private reproval all the way up to disbarment.  (I would suspect that the State Bar would probably go with a minimum of suspension with a further ethics requirement, depending on the aggravating and mitigating circumstances.)

Cancelling the meeting was definitely the right thing to do, as it avoids that awkwardness that could easily arise, especially in a small firm.  He may well be a damned good lawyer (perhaps needing extra money to pay student loans, save for a house, help an ailing family member, or perhaps just a thrill seeker), and his firm might be excellent, but there are plenty of excellent lawyers out there.

I do, however, think that you need to let him know what is going on.  You had a good time with him, and you presumably like him as a person.  You might even want to repeat.  But I think that out of respect for him, you should tell him how you came to know about his day job so that he can take the necessary precautions to reduce the possibility of being "found out" by someone at the firm (maybe even a gay partner who hires him!)  Unfortunately, there are a lot of mean people out there, and while you have handled this well (and preserved his discretion), there are many queens out there who would love to make this guy's life a living hell just for the "fun" of it.  

Maybe I should hire him and check out his briefs 🙂   

[RealAvalon]

On 8/7/2022 at 11:44 AM, boredboy96 said:

I hired very attractive and fit escort last night. We had such a great time. He's young, hot, smart, funny, and a great listener.

I am involved in a legal issues and was looking at law firm websites this morning. His picture came up as a lawyer at a firm. I plan on hiring him again and again, but I don't know how it will be with me knowing about his "real life." 

Advice? 

How much do you want to him to know about you?  Lawyers find out a lot. 

[+ glutes]

So do their investigators.

[AZNBoyNYC]

On 8/10/2022 at 3:09 PM, boredboy96 said:

OP here. I canceled before our meeting saying that another firm decided to take the case the night before. I only spoke to the secretary and she seemed to want to be anywhere but work anyway so it worked out. 

He does not have an ad, it is just word of mouth from existing clientele. 

Also, I do know of two other lawyers who are escorts. One quit law and does videos, the other has a solo practice I think. 

You made a very good choice and very ethical in your action. By withdrawing from this potential conflict of interest, you not only help yourself out of a potential issue but also help the escort too, it is a win-win situation and perhaps you can decide to continue with his service while engaging other law firm for your main business.