KensingtonHomo

Not to go too off track - because Alex is great - but I'm not a big tipper. Like a few others have said, providers are setting their rates. If I get a massage at a spa, I tip well. In Alex's case, I felt he set his rate a bit too low. 

I don't see how what the client suggested would even work unless the two of you already knew each other somewhat from repeated appointments.  How can one pretend to be someone's boyfriend without knowing anything about him?
I fully support your decision solely based on not wanting to attempt to deceive others.

Sorry it happened. But there were far too many red flags, starting with the discount request. Be strict, have your rules and never break them even if it’s tempting. 

I told a provider I was on my way to his place and he replied, “I'm a bit behind schedule with another client. I’m trying to speed up.”  He told me to give him 20 more minutes.
I should just have canceled.  He couldn’t get it up no matter how hard he tried.
 

Boys on the Island most likely have a nice spot in a nice house already in place 
The game has already been lost 

To phrase another way:  "Is a person who enjoys his job merely a good actor, or does he truly enjoy it?"
You can enjoy your job, despite not wanting to do it full time if you weren't getting paid.  I believe it's the same with many male sex workers who enjoy the time they spend with most clients, despite not wanting to do it regularly if they weren't getting paid.

I contacted Alex at the last minute because I had a meeting canceled. He was prompt in responding to me, and we were able to connect.

In short, he was terrific. His apartment was very nice and clean. He was clean-shaven and blonder than his photos, which made him far more attractive. Alex was very welcoming and easy to speak with him. We had a nice chat before and at the start of the massage. Then, he asked if I wanted some quiet time, and we did.

He uses medium pressure, which is perfect for relaxing. The extras were wonderful, and I'll be seeing him again.

I've had 3 guys ask for their donation at the beginning of a meeting; and, I gave it to all three, since it would not be the end of the world for me if I wasn't satisfied.
Two were less experienced guys, who I think were genuinely nervous about being ripped off. They did everything agreed to and were a enjoyable enough experience, but not repeats, probably because of their inexperience. The third was more experienced, had a "My Own Private Idaho" suburbs-gone-street-trade vibe, did everything we agreed and more... had a great time with him and would think about a repeat if I was in the same city.
In all three cases, I felt that the request came from their sense of vulnerability in the situation and not from a desire or plan to rip me off.
I get it. When I was their age and working as a provider, I was ripped off by one client: at the end of the session he informed me he didn't have cash and proceeded to write me a check from a closed bank account. Fortunately for me, it was a low effort encounter and I just wrote it off as bad experience. 🤷‍♂️

What's really strange is that these events are highly segregated within a community that loudly preaches wide acceptance.
The circuit muscle guys don't want the overweight guys at the event who have their own bear circuit events where they shit talk the steroid queens and twinks.
And then there's the subset of party guys who all look alike, fuck alike and only hang out with what might be considered their twin.
It's dizzyingly fucking stupid.

I think the only concern is for poor and marginalized sex workers. 
But I don’t think Trump’s verdict will have an impact. The case has nothing to do with an escort. Daniels was not paid for the encounter.
i think it anything is under threat its OnlyFans and similar services by someone wanting to expand SESTA/FOSTA. Or additional efforts by conservatives and liberals to control online outlets like TikTok. 

I agree that it's important to remember that this is a provider/client relationship. That said, I think there is some degree of acting but the best providers - whether you specify a BFE or not - are people who really enjoy meeting people, getting to know them, and providing them with pleasure. That part of it probably isn't an act per se. But they are definitely playing a role. 

We met Kai yesterday. He did look exactly like his photos, kind of a Baldwin brother vibe. His body is ridiculous. Kai was very kind and welcoming. Very adept at all the things we like. In terms of the "weird" vibe. he just has a very deadpan sense of humor, which I generally appreciate. But if you don't realize he's kidding, I can see it coming off a bit odd. If we see him again, we'd probably have him over to ours. We couldn't this weekend. DM if you want more details. 

I was not in my 20s in the 70s but I was very grateful to my predecessors who fought for that first nondiscrimination laws, who founded GMHC and ACT UP, who created and entire culture and when I was in high school and college were bearing the brunt of the AIDS crisis.
 
Honestly, it’s even more disrespectful for young queers today to lack appreciation when the information is so readily available. And the rising tide of anti-queer fascism is cutting our rights off left and right in many states. So the kids should wake up before they find themselves in a pre-Stonewall situation just like we’re in a post-Roe situation. 

If you want someone who speaks the language of love in an understandable way, try an English speaker.

That's not true. We all engage with other professionals who require a deposit to book an appointment or a credit card to charge you a cancellation fee. Sure, the illicit nature of the enterprise doesn't provide recourse that others would, but if we're talking about a small deposit of $25, that is reasonable. Also, in my experience, that deposit is only required for the first appointment. Once a provider realizes you're legit, they don't ask again. 

I think the only concern is for poor and marginalized sex workers. 
But I don’t think Trump’s verdict will have an impact. The case has nothing to do with an escort. Daniels was not paid for the encounter.
i think it anything is under threat its OnlyFans and similar services by someone wanting to expand SESTA/FOSTA. Or additional efforts by conservatives and liberals to control online outlets like TikTok. 

I find that statement to be true most of the time. I have typically found it beneficial for any relationship to let the other party know that my impression of them isn't based on the specific factors of A and B, etc.
For example, if someone starts in on an explanation of "why" they were late, I usually interrupt with "the why isn't important. You were delayed, but you are here now. That's all that is important."
My experience has been that when people know I am not judging them on EVERYTHING, they are more relaxed, and consequently more honest about true details of themselves.

I'm not an escort but if I was, I would much rather see a client with a physical disability than one who was rude but without disability. It's a shame that there are guys who will treat you that way but I bet there are some great ones who will be able to give you what you're looking for

Thank you for your replies. Didn't know. I'll try the suggestions. The masseur was great in every aspect of the event and he deserves a stellar review.
That policy makes it difficult for the provider to receive a review, and especially makes it difficult for the client to give a bad review since trying to contact the bad masseur after the fact might not be an easy task.

You can still write a review, but first click on the button to contact the masseur. Be sure you’re logged in so they’ll have record of that. They won’t know whether or not you actually called the masseur, but that’s enough for them to accept a review. You may need to fib on the date of the session so it’s at least the same day or later from when you initially contacted. 

I think the only concern is for poor and marginalized sex workers. 
But I don’t think Trump’s verdict will have an impact. The case has nothing to do with an escort. Daniels was not paid for the encounter.
i think it anything is under threat its OnlyFans and similar services by someone wanting to expand SESTA/FOSTA. Or additional efforts by conservatives and liberals to control online outlets like TikTok. 

I think the only concern is for poor and marginalized sex workers. 
But I don’t think Trump’s verdict will have an impact. The case has nothing to do with an escort. Daniels was not paid for the encounter.
i think it anything is under threat its OnlyFans and similar services by someone wanting to expand SESTA/FOSTA. Or additional efforts by conservatives and liberals to control online outlets like TikTok. 

This has been discussed so many times.....when providers talk about their clientele, the youngest end of the spectrum seems to be mid/late 30s.  The higher end seems to vary a lot but at least falls into the 50s, although some will report well into the 70s. and few, like Hagen have had even older clients There are some long-term past/present posters who were in their 80s. When I've attended DC meet-ups. I would guess that ages ranged from late 40s to 70s. 
The long-term guys for whom this is a profession are accustomed to their clients being older, sometimes quite older than them. Some, like Mike Gaite have indicated that they've always been into guys older than themselves.
If there's going to be a problem it will be among younger guys, new to the occupation. The youngest guys tend to be disorganized as business people which makes me glad I'm not interested in twinks. There is huge turnover within the first month of an ad and some others don't last more than a few months. The best advice if you want to avoid perceived rejection is to wait and see who establishes themselves and to look at comments here. 
If you're self conscious about your appearance, join a gym and get into a program of exercise and diet. You'll live longer and ultimately will be happier. Again, providers for whom this is a profession or at least a long-term gig, will have seen it all and will accept the range of guys they see. Newbies---well, wait and see who sticks around. If you're self-conscious, you probably don't want to be someone's "training case".
 
 

Hey Thomas, 
I'm sorry you're having this experience. I don't know where you're located but I do know some providers in NYC who are happy to see disabled clients. Perhaps if you share the city you're in, members can help identify some good providers. 

No, my argument was that deposits benefit more than just the provider. I'm sure you make deposits or give your credit card to reserve all kinds of things. And you do so because the professional or vendor will only reserve your booking with a deposit.