KensingtonHomo

That's odd. I'm assuming you didn't meet. I agree with @Moke.

It's unclear to me if you're attracted to men sexually or if you want close guy friends. Honestly, if you haven't spoken to a therapist about this, and you can manage it, that would be a good route to go. It feels like you have a lot to unpack likely due to your upbringing, which maybe a sex surrogate could help you address, but it feels deeper than that to me. are you attracted to women at all?

I agree with others here who think you're not ready for this. It strikes me as unusual that you are a man in your 40s - presumably sexually active to some degree - and you've never received oral sex. It makes me think perhaps you grew up in a super religious way or something else that's made you so scared of STIs. I have been sexually active 99 percent of the time with men and I got my first STI this year. I didn't love it but I take doxy for 7 days and I'm fine. I also contacted partners I had and they're all good. HPV is something to worry about. Many of us have it, but getting vaccinated is smart if you don't. My recommendation is that you go for an erotic massage first. Pick a few guys, and look them upere. Some will provide oral, and that's a lower s-akes (and usually cheaper) way to have a same-sex experience.

As with many things related to this hobby, it depends on the provider (and, I suspect, the client). I've had some great experiences with providers I've seen once or multiple times, who seemed to enjoy their work and I never got the impression they saw me as an ATM. And I've had a few experiences where it was obvious that they were just there for the money. The latter group won't be hired again. With the people who don't make me feel like an ATM, there's definitely more trust.

Yeah... I don't know if this other guy is his boyfriend or what. But he's like 22, 6'8" and not particularly good looking or fit. So it's not really a plus.

I've said elsewhere that I'm very sensitive to smell, so I'd rather they take 5 minutes to freshen up so the rest of the time is enjoyable. If you live in a hot place or its summer, someone can leave feeling all fresh and put together and show up sweaty and a mess.

I can't say if anyone is scamming. But as someone who's 90% a bottom, some days it's not in the cards. Perhaps saying they're "too tight" is a way of not having to say their stomach is upset or they have hemorrhoids. Either way, they should inform you that they're not up for it and offer to reschedule or reduce the rate. That said, I've been disappointed more than one by a top who couldn't stay hard. Do people think that should also result in a reduced fee?

I'm surprised the legal issue didn't come up sooner. If an escort sets prices for specific acts, arguing that the money is compensation for their time becomes difficult. I am pretty explicit about what I want. If someone doesn't offer that, I move on. The guy who recently stiffed me on my deposit, and I canceled because he said he doesn't kiss. If I'm hiring an escort who lists themselves as a top and offers various services, I expect them to be included in the overall price. Of course, if someone shows up smelling or dirty, a provider has every right to refuse service.

I want to reach out to CollegeBoy for this weekend. His profile doesn't list a phone number. For those who met him, did you message him through Rentmen?

In my experience, if it's a quick shower it doesn't matter.

I mostly agree with you. In fact, if we're having an escort over, the Virgo in me insists on cleaning like we're having a dinner party. I'm sober and my husband only drinks socially, so that rarely comes up. Regarding our first impression of the provider, I think manners go a long way toward having that be positive. And hygiene should not be an issue. It's the summer in NYC, so offering a shower is always good if I show up sweaty or the provider does. I am personally susceptible to smell and do not like anything more than a hint of musk. So I avoid providers who talk about armpits or being "ripe" in their profiles. I don't have any issue with those who enjoy it, but I literally could not have sex with someone who smells. Same for excessive cologne.

That's what I thought. I do understand that a lot of tops prefer raw sex (many think it feels better) but as a bottom I can barely tell the difference. So the idea of upcharging for someone who wants to avoid possibly getting or transmitting an STI is just whack.

I almost admire the gall of someone who catfished you to try and flip it into something long term. We’re the pics of him but at a different age/fitness level or someone else?

We just had a weird experience with Logan. We’re vacationing in Maui and there’s very few escorts. It turns out, he was going to be here for part of the time we are. We chatted a few times over a the last couple of weeks so arrange stuff. today, he texts that he’ll be arriving in Maui at 6. We discussed meeting up tonight. Confirmed a time and then he says “I’m traveling with a buddy. We do 4 handed erotic massage. Would you be interested in that?” We weren’t prepared to pay for two escorts so we said no. After some time I wrote. “Is that a dealbreaker?” And he said “yes it is.” His buddy lists his age as 22, and he’s not terribly attractive. So I have no idea what’s going on here but be warned if you reach out.

I'm inclined to agree with @Saabster. While I will send a deposit of no more than $50, the aggressive language is a turn-off. And insisting that you pay the rest before anything happens is a red flag. You'll see many people on here who paid upfront and got shorted time or suddenly promised services were not available. So I will make a deposit but I will not pay upfront. Christian

Yeah, we're looking at a provider right now and his profile says he's straight. However, in researching him he seems INCREDIBLY gay. All his porn is gay; his Insta is gay, etc. And he's not ubermasculine or what have you. So I'm guessing it's just a marketing tactic. Edited to add: We're going someplace with very few listed providers or I wouldn't have considered someone who said they were "straight."

I'm sorry to hear of your mother's passing. How far in advance did you cancel? I feel like 24 hours or more notice is not something to worry about.

I was recently burned by a provider that I sent a deposit to but it hasn't turned me off to the practice. I wouldn't send $250. But I'm generally open to $25-$50 depending on how much the total will be. I feel it's a reservation fee and having done this for 5 years and only been burned once, it seems most guys are legit. Caveat that I also check reviews and on here before I send on.

I'm cackling at the idea that both some clients and providers - who are MEN - are too precious for there to be body hair. Most men have a decent amount of body hair. So, expecting them to show up looking like dolphins or putting that expectation on yourself is giving into a pathological obsession with unrealistic looks in our community. Sure, we all have our preferences, and that's great. Oddly, I don't like facial hair, so I sometimes ask if a provider is sporting a beard or mustache. No one is offended. To the OP, I agree that if you want to see him again, tell him you're a bit hairier now. I also think it won't be an issue.

I hate them. If someone brings one out, I'm like "no thank you."

You guys have totally piqued my interest.

I think that @Walt is right. But if you've seen someone before and their profile is expired, it might just mean they're busy. But I've reached out to guys before who are still working and happy to see me. If the profile is deleted, I usually get no response.

I just searched Las Vegas on Rent.men and there was a ton of fit, muscular and ripped guys on there.

It sounds to me like you have a specific type (muscular) and "sexy", the latter of which is entirely subjective. We certainly have plenty of conventionally muscular men here. I don't find overly muscular men attractive. I prefer everything from average to tall and lanky - kind of naturally athletic looking but also into dorky guys. What is the typical Vegas type? Are they skinny?

Do you live in a city with no or only a few providers? I"m wondering why it was bad for these guys.