Jamie21

I messaged you elsewhere 😉on it lol but here’s my list of red flags. 100% guaranteed! 🚩 Pic collectors (more than 1 pic requested). If my website/X profile/OnlyFans isn’t enough then that’s too bad. 🚩Endless chat before booking. Including phrases like ‘I’ll be a regular’, ‘I’m a virgin / I’m really tight etc’, ‘what will you do to me?’ etc. And of course discount requesters ‘I’m a student / unemployed etc’ : NEVER discount. Those guys are 99% definite flakes. 🚩Pic senders (more than 1 pic sent). These guys never become clients. Waste of time. 🚩’Hey’ as an opening message. He’s not serious. It won’t happen. Don’t respond. Those are the big 4. If somehow someone displaying one or more of those indicators actually makes a booking I seek a confirmation message (via WhatsApp or Signal etc or text) on the day before the booking and on the day of the booking if possible/necessary. If either of those messages are ignored I cancel the session. I tell them this when they book: no pre meet confirmation…no booking. I don’t travel / prepare or keep the time free if it isn’t confirmed. It saves a lot of grief. Sorry you had a bad run 😕

Yes, on Spotify on the Naked Men Talking podcast. Link here https://spotify.link/ClzyTW8HIXb

Ok. I’ll do it. But I draw the line at drying them too. I have boundaries.

I did a podcast. Was good fun. Good luck with it @Simon Suraci It is hard to put oneself in the shoes of someone who isn’t a sex worker. One becomes a bit blasé about it all. My experience was that people are intrigued by the work and have a lot of misconceptions about it, such as you have sex all day, you make loads of money and you live a jet set lifestyle. If only. I found they’re interested in the things that show those misconceptions aren’t necessarily correct. Yes some days I have a lot of sex, make money and go to interesting places but most days I’m dealing with flakes, making zero, and washing towels at home.

I’m vers but in most of the films I’ve been in I top. I’d say 80% of them I’m the top. I don’t watch much porn but the performers who interest me tend to be bottoms. I’m less interested in the role they take, it’s more about whether I think they’re enjoying it or whether it looks like they’re going through the motions. Those who really engage with it are the guys I like watching.

Reading these is so interesting. Thank you to everyone who has contributed. It shows that it’s definitely not just about looks although clearly that’s important: I think it’s like the entry pass to the job - you need some kind of looks attribute whether that’s a big cock, a muscular physique or something that is distinctive. It’s also about personality and professionalism. I think the professionalism issue is something frequently overlooked by those doing the work. They rely on the looks and think ‘job done’. Big mistake. My learning from doing the job is clients like the action but they come back for the connection and the intimacy. You can get action on a hookup but you won’t necessarily get connection, intimacy and someone who’s focused on giving. I’m glad to hear clients look for attributes like these.

I do sensual massage training! I’ve worked as a sensual masseur for 7 years and seen thousands of clients. I train people in a sensual massage routine and advise on setting up professionally if they want to do that. See my website for details. The only drawback…I’m based in London.

Nope! But If they watch my porn videos they can be satisfied 24/7.

I had a day this week when I saw 4 clients. That’s unusual. Some weeks I don’t see 4 in the whole week. On average it’s 4 a week. I do other things alongside sex work. It’s too unpredictable and challenging to do sex work exclusively.

I think it’s definitely a frame of mind thing to bottom. It is for me anyway…and in my experience (my ‘body count’ is in the thousands….and before you judge me for that… it’s my job) a guy has to be mentally ready to bottom as well as being physically ready - as in opened up a bit, empty bladder, no issues that might cause damage etc. If everything aligns and I’m in the right frame of mind then it’s easy to bottom but if there’s an issue like I’m not feeling properly douched, or I just don’t feel comfortable with him then I can’t take it for long, in any position. Also, sometimes people’s first experience of bottoming is traumatic and I think that influences their subsequent experiences: they tense up, and can’t relax into it. It takes a while to get over that.

Oh yes I’ve had that recently. It wasn’t a whole sheet but was a bit of paper 😱. He ought to have showered properly. But I don’t ask for pics from clients. I just deal with any unpleasantness appropriately, which may impinge on their experience. I prefer not to have a picture of the client, it’s not necessary.

I was semi joking. I don’t meet people on just a body part (unless it’s 10 inches) but I understand people do. They go to cum dump sessions based on only a bum pic. I think if you want to do that then it’s fine, why not? You’re just turning up and fucking him. I prefer a bit more interaction with someone before I’ll meet them off an app like Sniffies or Grindr but certainly part of the initial attraction is a picture. Then it’s the quality of their interaction and what they’re up for. If all that lines up, I’ll meet them.

Sometimes there’s a person attached to the dick or ass. Occasionally you speak to the person. Usually though it’s just a matter of dealing with the cock or ass.

I agree, morning sex is best. Nothing better than having a big breakfast after a morning client. The only challenge is if I’m bottoming because it does mess up my regularity if you know what I mean😂

£50? I doubt it! Going rate for an hour sensual is £120 to £180. You won’t even get a ‘normal’ spa style massage for £50.

You learn fast. It’s 100% the route to sustainable success. Most months over 50% of my clients are returning clients. There’s also truth in this in my experience. I’ve collaborated with quite a few of these ‘A list’ guys and whilst I wouldn’t say they’re not nice, they were perfectly friendly towards me but it was definitely a ‘performance’. That’s fine, it’s filming porn, you’re creating a fantasy and it’s perfectly possible to perform for the camera but I’d say if you’re hiring them then they’re probably not going to be doing much work to make you feel great. To some of these guys it’s simply enough to look amazing: they don’t think they need to do much for you.

I did do a tandem sensual massage for two lesbians one time (tandem massage is two tables, two masseurs, two clients, massaging next to each other, the masseurs switch tables part way through). I’m bi, so was the other masseur. Before the session we wondered whether the two lesbians would interact with us in any way. Despite us being naked and available to touch the lesbians were only interested in receiving touch and got turned on by the proximity and sound of their partner enjoying their massage. They both climaxed at the same time. So unfortunately we didn’t turn them straight 😕. Probably made them even more lesbian. I find ‘straight’ women are much more relaxed about same sex activities than ‘straight’ guys. I’ve been at parties with straight couples and the women play with each other easily whereas the guys are really anxious about doing anything ‘gay’. It’s like they think if they let me touch their cock within 5 minutes I’ll be balls deep in their hole…and they worry they might enjoy it 😂.

Here’s a challenge / question for you. In my other line of work I make massage porn films (quick promotion- available on my OnlyFans and Justforfans 🤪). One of the ‘guys’ I’ve filmed with is a lovely trans guy who has a vagina. The rest of him is very much male (hairy, muscles etc). He’s great and I enjoyed the filming with him, so much so that we’ve done two films now. I’m bi so the presence of a vagina wasn’t an issue for me (I understand how they work 🙂). But how would you handle a guy with a pussy? I’m genuinely interested, would it be a turn on when you look at his body and then 😱when he takes off his underwear? All my films are with guys and I expected some criticism for filming with a trans guy and showing me fucking him (in the vagina) but apart from one negative comment the films were received positively. I think that’s because apart from the vagina he’s very male. It looks like two guys having sex.

Many of my clients are straight when they walk through the door, but gay when they leave. Isn’t that fabulous 😉

I see guys regularly checking out my profile, not daily but very often, and they never make contact to book or ask questions. It is strange but I don’t mind. There’s pictures of me all over the web so I guess some people look at those too so why should I be bothered by regular visits to my advertising? I think it’s probably guys who are building up to booking. If hiring a guy is new to you, and if you’re also new to being with a guy, maybe you’re exploring your sexuality then it can take a lot of courage to build up to making contact. I like helping those kind of clients so I’ll not do anything to discourage them.

I agree with @AJDalton, it’s a read the room situation. A few clients are so horrified that they’re with a sex worker after they’ve cum that they want to be up and out of here immediately. It’s like the guilt and shame immediately kicks in as soon as the first splash of cum hits their belly😂. I like to give them plenty of time to come down from the moment. I usually do head massage (or surprisingly foot massage is fantastic after a climax) so they can get into a totally relaxed state. If the climax has been early in the session and if he’s able to have a second coming then it’s been known for me to start playing ‘down there’ again and get him going for a speedy second load. It’s interesting to take someone from zero to 100 in a short time. Most however just like the slow return to normal and some cuddles. Lovely.

Agree. I’ve declined other clients in the past because I’ve got a booking and I’ve made a commitment. I’ve travelled to the clients hotel, or place, spent time preparing, making myself mentally and physically ready to see him….and then I either get ‘oh I changed my mind’ or some what sounds like a lame excuse or worse just complete ghosting. I feel like a fool for having taken someone seriously. I’ve lost business and wasted my time. But I’ve learned and now I can tell with 95% confidence who is a flake. What I do agree with some clients comments is when unscrupulous and unprofessional providers accept bookings, even deposits and then flake on the client. That’s totally unacceptable. But my advice to clients is to book with your head, not your dick. If he responds lackadaisically, wants a deposit without good justification, seems too good to be true, is evasive with details, has few reviews or they are too unrealistic, or he’s suddenly appeared on platforms, then use your common sense. Good providers will be professional in all their dealings with you. You won’t see any of these red flags if you book a good guy.

It’s not quite as simple as that though. I’m up for clients filming their session with me, but only if they sign a consent and release form (online) for me to publish it on OnlyFans. You can’t simply publish a film on Onlyfans without all the participants agreement provided on the Onlyfans platform. Most clients, when confronted with putting their real name and ID into OnlyFans decide they’d rather not do it! So no filming happens. I’m ok if they want a few pics or a short clip but that’s just for them to keep, it doesn’t get published. Filming the whole session for them to keep is not happening, it’s too intrusive and distracting. Yesterday I had a client want a couple of pics of me and him during the session so he could show his wife. Happy to oblige with that.

It’s the worst part. But you can learn to spot the signs of a flake. They all have them. Long chats for over an hour on the plans is a definite red flag for flakiness. If the chat goes on for ages about what they want to happen then basically I discount the booking as being unlike happen and I won’t do anything to prepare or commit to it. When the time comes to commit (last minute to douche or travel or whatever) I send a message asking him to confirm and if I get no response then I take it as a cancellation. Nothing lost on my side except the time chatting. What happens is like @PhileasFoggsays. They book when horny. When the time comes they’re no longer horny and the prospect of a real situation freaks them out. It’s usually guys on the down low. They watch porn, think it will be fun, build up a fantasy while booking and then come the day it’s all too much so they go quiet and ignore you like you’re just some loser who doesn’t deserve the respect of a message saying ‘sorry I changed my mind’. I keep their number, because sure enough in a years time they’ve forgotten, it all happens again and this time when they message me I can say ‘last time you no showed so I’m not dealing with you, goodbye’.

I never do sessions where I don’t know the other guy. I need to be comfortable with who I’m working with. If I was a client booking multiple providers my advice would be to book your favourite guy and then ask him for suggestions of additional guys. He’ll go to those guys he knows are good. You can then choose which of these you like and the chances of getting someone who will derail the session will be zero. Get your main guy to do all the arrangements over fees etc and you just settle up with him.