DrownedBoy

He has a habit of only advertising when he needs the money, which is always a red flag. And I know that, even years after he moved away, he never even bothered removing the word "Chicago " from his ad text. Doesn't seem that interested in escorting.

That's something I'd only discuss via PM.

Exactly. I keep those 2 separated very sharply. I had a regular who stayed well past the time I hired him for. I insisted on paying him extra to avoid any complications. Likewise, I make a point not to hire anyone for conversation. There are many intelligent, well read, and educated escorts, but for me, bonding over conversation is for friends, not escorts. In fact, 2 of my 3 regulars are ESL, and I find that more relaxing.

Agree very strongly. Talking about reality isn't condoning reality. But reality isn't nice, and it's wrong to just ignore reality when it makes us uncomfortable. Some memories came up while reading these posts. I grew up in a white, ethnic, working class Chicago neighborhood. By today's standards, you'd call the people I grew up with extremely racist. I mentioned having black providers who wanted more after we agreed to a price. I remember the exact words of one: at the last minute he said, "hey, can you make it [agreed rate plus 50]?" I immediately canceled. Now, I remember being warned against those exact words when I was younger, and I've been hearing versions of it my whole life. In my neighborhood, we had a phrase for that line, and that phrase included the n-word. Now, I've lived (and hired) long enough to know such behavior comes from people of all races. But if I hadn't escaped my neighborhood (and few did), I probably would believe those stereotypes.

Unless you're a shallow client like me, who's willing to pay extra if you look like a bodybuilder...

I've had several three ways, and all were cheaper than hiring 2 separate providers. In my case, either: The two providers specifically offered a discount if you hired both at once. Or: The provider had a friend who wasn't a regular provider, but needed some extra money. It's always worth asking if a provider has an "unlisted" friend he'd bring along. In my experience, the friend is always much cheaper.

Thanks for your honesty here. In several ethnographic studies of young male prostitutes in U.S. cities, many providers admitted they avoided black clients because they were "cheap" or too demanding. Racism goes both ways, although in this case, due to economic stereotypes. @DWnyc point of order. If either client or provider haggles over prices "after making an appointment," it's not "haggling." It's "a violation of a verbal contract." And to me, that means instant cancellation. EDIT: And @Simon Suraci I admit I'm seeing other patterns now thanks to your input. On several occasions, I've had a provider haggle with me after we agreed to a price. All of them were black. I see where these stereotypes come from.

Deployments are ALWAYS 30 days in the future...

Yes they are.... 😐

I have a question that I really need to ask providers. Is their an informal "tier" of different rates in the U.S. due to race? And how open are people in discussing that? I ask because I've read comments here about Caucasians making more than minorities. Likewise, I had an Asian provider flat out say that as an Asian, he makes much less than other providers. I'm not calling anyone racist for their preferences when hiring. I'm just curious, as the vast majority of my partners (hires or dating) aren't Caucasian.

Yup. I met a nice Medellin bodybuilder on one of those sites who provided me with many reasonably priced muscle shows. One of these days I must travel to Columbia, but I'll need a street smart guide.

Speak for yourself; my friends have also speculated that I have such an aging picture hidden away somewhere. Back to topic - despite being a Chicagoan, I'm afraid I have no input. Few of my hires are Caucasian. EDIT To be clear, I will add that few of my bfs are Caucasian either.

Unfortunately, as I noted, he's not willing to learn. Or more likely - he plays stupid to try and get out of doing any work. He's far from the only provider to do that. Nor is undisguised greed attractive. He had a channel that was ostensibly a guide to working out (he started it after leaving Chicago for California; don't know if he still films). Watching that made pretty clear he had an ego. From my experience and others here, he's been that way for years, so he's not going to just wake up one day and become professional. Hiring him is a pure crap shoot, and he's no good as a regular. Buyer beware.

I would have liked to have him as a regular when he lived in Chicago, but he was too inconsistent during the year or so when I was hiring him. Sometimes he'd be enthusiastic and friendly, while other times he'd start putting on his pants halfway through the session (although he took them back off when I complained). Sometimes, after we agreed on a session, he'd ask for more money at the last minute. Whenever he did that, I had to cancel that session to teach him a lesson. He'd stop asking for a bit, then a couple months later, start again, triggering another round of education. In short, he seems to have serious issues with taking responsibility and being professional. I'm sure his Ugandan background had a bad effect on him, but I'm not one to accept sob stories. This was a shame, considering he once made me come by just kissing me.

And only guys who save a penny make my rainy day...

The question is whether or not the relationship constitutes a "friendship. " That being said, everyone from Cicero to Francis Bacon wrote essays trying to define friendship, and nobody agrees.

Yeah. Clients should also be allowed to make fun of cheap prospective clients 😜

From personal experience at an elite university, I can tell you the gay mafia starts young. They were mainly rich kids who stayed in the closet out of fear of their families' reactions or the possible effects on their career (obviously awhile ago). They'd hook up with each other, join fraternities, and look down on openly gay people. I couldn't stand them, with the exception of some of them who paid me to write their research papers. Rich kids are hopeless 😏

I think of my regulars as businessmen I work with, and that I've found to be professional, trustworthy, nice, and can get the job done. Same as my barber and mechanic. We get along and chat while conducting business, but business is the only reason we meet. Sorry, but if you pay money to see someone, they are neither a friend nor acquaintance. That doesn't mean you can't get along and compliment them on their trade. But it does mean it's improper to let personal issues and emotions come into it.

Yeah. Go for 299.95.

Awwww.....some nice dungeon pics would add so much color.....

I will report the following trend in Chicago. Prices stopped going up, and 300 is the highest hourly rate, unless you're a stud from out of town. Some good newbies have arrived in the 150 to 200 hourly market. The interesting thing is "price shaving." Established escorts with good reviews on RM are going just a bit under 300 (e.g. was quoted 280). This price shave is minimal, and to someone like me, makes no difference since I use cash and round up. However, it's a strong indicator of bad economic times ahead if escorts are competing in price, even if it's only a token discount.

How interactive are they?

Everyone here is right. Make sure his money is in a pile. Take a Benjamin, and ask your question while holding that bill over the pile.

Ha! Got that too (I won't receive oral, only perform it). In some ways, RM can be just like Grindr. I recall one Chicago provider who, years ago, offered a 30 minute "quickie." I thought that was a bit tacky. (I later tried to hire the guy for an hour, but he wasn't into my stuff)