APPLE1

I have had several dates, and one long term relationship, with men I met on Grindr, Adam 4 Adam, and Growlr.

Interesting topic. In my experience, and also witnessing the life of people I care about, friends and family, I have seen many times the issue of lack of intimate connection, and ways of dealing wit it, many times. Personally I have concluded that this is part of people's own journey in life, and I am no one to tell what (or if there) is a right way of dealing with our own desire for intimate connections. First, I've found that what that means for different people is not the same. Some men are quite happy with having casual affairs every now and then and living their lives by themselves. Others seem to have a strong need and starve for the care and attention of another man in an intimate way, and have taken care of it in ways that are healthy, and in ways that are unhealthy.
One of my friends is in some kind of recovery program from sex addiction, which he defines as en excessive consumption of his own financial and emotional resources in the pursue of intimacy and excitement in the form of casual sexual encounters. He told me that he has "tried it all" in the sexual expression arena. His recovery program seems to be focused in looking for that connection in ways that are not harmful to him. I'm no mental health expert, so I cannot comment on how effective his approach is. He seems ok and he's still my friend, so I guess that whatever he's doing works for him.
Early in my adult life as a gay man, I immediately started noticing the issue of disconnection between us. I remember thinking "How come that we are so many, we know each other, we are together, we live the same or similar experience, we suffer similar social oppresions and struggles and yet, it seems like we just fail to find each other?" Through the decades, I've seen many gay men expressing their loneliness and starve for intimate connections, but sadly, when you take a closer look, none of their actions, attitudes and beliefs lead to legitimately looking for it, or willingness to provide it to others. Some are more interested in physical attributes, social status, or in the ridiculous fantasy of getting intimacy from a heterosexual man (a person who by the very definition of who they are, doesn't like you and has no interest in intimacy with you).
Some providers have offered me their friendship, and I have accepted it in some cases. One masseur actually hinted me that wanted to get to know me a little more (that's when I told him that I forgot to mention that I am married). My point is that even if there is a slight possibility that a provider might show some interest in something deeper, the reality and the possibility are minimal, and that is aside from the degree of comfort that a client might have with the provider continuing providing to other clients, had something deeper develops.
Then there's the issue of what does such intimacy look to you. Does it involve love, sex, frienship, support, presence when you are in need, or a combination of any of the above? That is something that we define for our own selves, and then that's something that we decide where (or if) to look for it.
I hope you find what you need and find it in a way that is healthy for your wellbeing and for your wallet.

Just by virtue of it being a gay app makes it a hook up app right??? LOL!
Excluding the apps marketed for selling services, you can make any app what you want it to be. I think guys looking for more than a hook up are in the minority on the apps, but you can do it. I've done it. I've known others that have done it.
As I have traveled, I have noticed regional differences in app usage too. How popular they are in an area, and how many guys in an area seem use a particular app for hook ups or dating.

Just by virtue of it being a gay app makes it a hook up app right??? LOL!
Excluding the apps marketed for selling services, you can make any app what you want it to be. I think guys looking for more than a hook up are in the minority on the apps, but you can do it. I've done it. I've known others that have done it.
As I have traveled, I have noticed regional differences in app usage too. How popular they are in an area, and how many guys in an area seem use a particular app for hook ups or dating.

those aren’t the apps to use if you want to meet someone for more than sex.  or, at least the probability is much lower.
use the more mainstream apps like Grindr, Scruff, Hornet - make it clear you’re looking for more than sex & you will only meet for coffee or drinks first, before any sex.  That screens out 95%+ of the people that want sex only and you might actually meet someone decent. 
i met my now husband online many years ago with exactly that strategy - it’s possible.  
I think it’s a better strategy to write a profile that is more about screening out the people you don’t want - something like “NO DRUGS” “NO PNP”.  Instead of writing to attract more people. 

It’s pretty fair to assume that guys who take multiple appointments per day are probably not ejaculating to all of them because they need to keep their mojo at top speed for their next client. There can be some fun and games with edging but, even then, I’m going to want to cum.  Not really convinced that not cumming repeatedly for extended periods is good for your prostate either.
 Dont want your pipes to get rusty.

Empathy naturally springs forth in response to the distressing account shared by the OP. Amidst the wealth of valuable advice, I feel compelled to raise a different perspective.
It's worth noting that the OP is a newcomer to our community, and while his story may indeed be genuine, we lack the necessary context to ascertain its veracity. Importantly, the accused party is absent from this dialogue, unable to present his side of the narrative.
In light of this, I advocate for caution before divulging the identity of the alleged harasser. Consider the approach Daddy would have taken in such a situation – thorough investigation before reaching conclusions.
@ANotAMouse please know that my intent is not to undermine your experience or sincerity in seeking support. Should your account be genuine, I encourage you to heed the valuable advice shared above. However, we must exercise prudence when navigating such sensitive allegations within the confines of an anonymous online forum.

Ignoring is the best, like others said. This guy has no power over you.
 
I would have trouble keeping myself from replying with this:
 
"I lost contact and was going to send you a hundred, but if that's how you feel, never mind."

To answer your question I think it's a little bit of column "A" and a little from column "B". It really depends on the escort... his physical limitations, how horny he is, whether he's in it to have fun too, etc.. 😛 
I would say out of all the providers I met most of them orgasmed/came. I have never asked/told an provider before the fun began, "I want to see you cum."  For me personally, it kind of takes away the experience, to say that in the beginning. Although I do understand it's a very import outcome for some clients. No pun intended. So i get why people ask upfront.
I have had a few providers ask me directly if I wanted them to cum after I had already did. I'm easy going... so I usually say, "if they want to." Most have. Some don't. For me the best is when it's obvious the provider wants to cum without me prompting. Even better when I make them cum and they didn't expect it or they're in the moment. I think one of my hottest is after a long session, I orgasmed and sat up to stretch at the edge of the bed. The escort says to me, "where are you going. I want to cum too"... raging boner in hand. I reassured him I wasn't going until he was happy as well.  

I estimate that a little over 50% of the providers I have met with came. It often gives me some questions. 
Is it sense of obligation to a client, or desire? Sometimes one? Sometimes the other? 
Sex should be fun. I don't want anyone involved to be miserable, so I am always willing to continue when any party expresses "almost there" or "could you do X." 
But, when we have the conversation about how our session will go, is it rude, or direct, to just lay out there that "I can be an active participant if you want to cum, and if you don't want to, that's fine too." 
Would providers feel less pressure and more relaxed having that knowledge from the start? 

I am not trying to belittle your experience, but unfortunately, YOU let them take your Ziploc baggie of meds, and YOU entertained their bullshit by answering questions.
Experience has taught me that I am the primary advocate for MY health. Generally that means, when I take my bag of pills along for a hospital stay, I only have to ASK 3 questions:
1) The chart lists current meds and supplements, right?
2) I haven't been declared not competent to make my own medical decisions, right?
3) My primary indicated I would be managing my own regular meds while I am here, right?
Once, a hospitalist tried to question my primary's orders on letting me manage my meds. It didn't go over well. My primary got loud and ugly. The hospitalist lost, quickly. I can't even imagine if it was a pharmacist and a nurse manager questioning the orders he wrote.

I am not trying to belittle your experience, but unfortunately, YOU let them take your Ziploc baggie of meds, and YOU entertained their bullshit by answering questions.
Experience has taught me that I am the primary advocate for MY health. Generally that means, when I take my bag of pills along for a hospital stay, I only have to ASK 3 questions:
1) The chart lists current meds and supplements, right?
2) I haven't been declared not competent to make my own medical decisions, right?
3) My primary indicated I would be managing my own regular meds while I am here, right?
Once, a hospitalist tried to question my primary's orders on letting me manage my meds. It didn't go over well. My primary got loud and ugly. The hospitalist lost, quickly. I can't even imagine if it was a pharmacist and a nurse manager questioning the orders he wrote.

And any other provider would also have blocked you for that! 🙈

I've never met with anyone, and I'm several years older than you.  What immediately jumped out at me was the phrase "provably on PrEP" and "willing to slip (me) a dose".  I cannot stress enough that a person cannot rely 100% on another's declaration of health status or their reported use of PrEP - provable or otherwise.  Compliance with medication cannot be proven, so even if you are shown a prescription or a bottle of pills, you have NO way of knowing whether or not your partner is using the medication correctly or at all.  Your health is 100% your responsibility, and entrusting it to another is extremely risky.    But only you can decide how much risk you are willing to assume.  As for having a dose or two of PrEP slipped to you, that is also very unwise.  How would you know if you were even given PrEP?  Plus, these are medications that can have significant side effects, and should only be prescribed by a physician who can assess your compatibility with the meds.  It isn't like asking someone for an aspirin.  I cannot tell anyone what they should or should not do, but if you are not at the point where you can receive advice from your own doctor about this, I question whether or not you should be considering a meet-up, given that you've referred to the safety aspect as the most important consideration.   Not trying to be a wet blanket, but I wouldn't want you to jump into a situation you may regret afterwards without fully assessing the risks. 

Recently I had a massage with a provider that I had hired a couple of times before. He did not let me know that there was someone else home. During the massage I could hear someone talking on the phone which of course was not great for the mood. At the end of the session on the way to the bathroom, I came face to face with his roommate/husband/partner/boyfriend. I think he was completely wrong not to give me a heads up about the situation and of course I will not be hiring him again.

It wouldn’t bother me at all. But if it diminishes your experience then by all means reschedule. You are spending your money and you should be totally comfortable with the situation.  

There's nothing sadder than a person who bases their self esteem on their sexy appearances. 
 
That's a great path to suicide as you grow old when gay.

I can understand that it's always a question of relative risk. I go to the dog park. Part of the "risk assessment" is weighing the other options. If I didn't go to the dog park, I'd walk the dog down the sidewalk. I typically encounter 15 other dog walkers on a walk. I let my dog sniff and play/interact with the dogs we meet for a bit. It doesn't seem significantly less risky than having more extended interaction with the 20 dogs that will be at the dog park. 
@Funguy is there a map to this mythical magical dog park you speak of full of the "snooty" people? I've never experienced it. LOL! I understand there are crazies on both ends of the dog park spectrum, but I think I would welcome the occasional canine tussle if it meant the DOGS socialized, and the owners got to  keep one eye on the dog and MY other eye on my phone crusing for escorts, or socializing on company of men, and not being  proselytized to about the mistakes I am making with my dog.  And don't get me wrong, I don't care who hosts, or partakes in,  a pot luck at the dog park. Likewise though, OWNERS shouldn't be badgered into participation because we are 2 strangers who simply encounter one another regularly at the dog park. I've known plenty middle aged housewives. WE never bonded just because we both liked dick, and just because someone else owns a dog, that's not enough to make a bond for me either. 
@Stormy  and @EZEtoGRU, I will am certainly willing to share a list of highlights that nut job dog park visitors have attempted to admonish me for: not feeding the right treats, not using the right bags to pick up his shit, not putting a coat on him in the cold (he is a cold weather breed), not shaving him in the summer so he stays cool, allowing him to interact with other dogs freely before asking the owner's permission (not that he's been ageessive to other dogs), not taking him up to and giving him an introduction to people (not that he's been aggressive to people), using a leash and collar instead of a harness (and he does walk completely calm and controlled with a collar), using the wrong leash for his breed, using hand signals and not talking to him enough, allowing him to play in deep water, mud, and/or cold water, allowing him to entice other dogs into playing in deep water, mud, and/or cold water, and finally my favorite, not teaching him that when he and another dog play with his tug toy, he has a social responsibility to let the smaller dogs win sometimes.
While I wish MY experiences at the dog park were better with people, I do still take the dog. HIS positive experiences are my ultimate motivator.

This is where the money is, it's easier than ever to get here, they're a very sensual, less inhibited Latin demographic, and the demand is high for their type of look: 
Muscled, smooth(ish), sexy and hung. 
I hope they come in droves and drive down overpriced mediocrity.  I'm not sure they're skilled masseurs, but they know how to enjoy sex.  😊

Everyone in my family bakes their own bread and has for as long as I have been around. With a wide network people who create, maintain, share, and trade starter, I have, admittedly, never bought it, but if I did, the King Arthur variety would not have been my choice. And I am not saying their FLOUR isn't quality.
Their website indicates they are using their all propose flour for starter. The easiest flour for a novice to use in starter is a high protein flour - whole wheat, Bran, Barley, etc. Once you have the knack, virtually any flour will work - rice, nut, all purpose, etc. I even have a great aunt who makes a cake flour starter.  If you seek a recipe online, or elsewhere, take a hard pass on the ones that add yeast. Starter is only flour and water. Anything else muddles the mix. If you hear people using yeast and sugar, that's Herman (sweat bread) starter, and it's a completely different animal.
If your tap water is high in Flouride or Chlorine, that can cause poor starter growth. A lot of my family uses filtered water, or trades well water as often as they trade starter.
Their prefered storage is a plastic bowl inside the oven. The plastic is resistant to temp changes, and the oven shields drafts. And yes, there has been more than one melted plastic bowl and ruined starter incident when someone forgot and turned the oven on.
A little about the final dough:
Some of my relatives love a bakers wisk, and some find them haughty fru fru.
The flour you have in the starter doesn't dictate the final flour you use in the dough.
It's a low effort process. So less is more when it comes to mixing/kneading. It can be a knack to figure out how much is just enough.
Often doughs are baked in an oven that isn't preheated. Therefore, a  heating pad  under your "rising" bowl can be a huge time saver when waiting for the dough to double in size.
And remember, if it's edible, it's a success!

@purplekow, before you fight the decision to total your car you might want to ask for the repair estimate. This will tell you why the car is being totaled. It is possible that there's damage to the axle, suspension, or frame that isn't apparent to the naked eye. 

Vegas is the last place you need to worry about 'being seen' with a hooker

I had an MT recently pull one out and while it felt great, I asked him if we could put it away and stick with regular Swedish massage. 
if it’s just for a minute or two it’s fine - but whether it’s a legit MT or a rentmasseur type MT, I’m hiring a massage guy - not a toy I could buy on Amazon. Touch is the point. 
 
sam

I'm hiring the masseur for his hands, not a Theragun.

I prefer to use this tool on myself to break up knots - I don’t trust someone to know pressure and angle - it’s not the same as masseur using own touch as a guide.