First time advice

[DonVan]

I’m looking for some advice as I prepare for my first experience with a man. I’ve spent some time on Rentmen and, while there are certainly some very attractive guys, I was hoping for a bit more communication beforehand.

The overall vibe on RM feels very rushed — a lot of “I’m available right now.” That may be fine down the road, but for my first experience I’d really prefer to exchange a few emails and have a conversation first. I have questions and would feel more comfortable getting to know someone a bit before meeting.

I’m a bottom, so there are things I’d like to discuss in advance, and I’m completely fine paying a premium for someone who’s patient, communicative, and understands that this is new for me.

Any advice will be greatly appreciated. 

Thanks,

DonVan

 

[Blnj856]

I would do a thorough search and narrow down your choices to a handful or so. Add those potential providers to your buddy list. For me, this is important because I can see which providers post “available now” and how often. I see it as the ones that don’t post as often, tend to have a comfortable client base built up, and seem to be more reliable and open to conversation (don’t go overboard) when it’s time to make an appointment. Remember, there are probably a lot of people that reach out with no real intention of meeting, which is why some providers don’t want to get into the back and forth. But nothing wrong with asking questions to see if they will be a good fit or not. 

[+ azdr0710]

https://www.companyofmen.org/topic/161836-newbie-question/#findComment-2482282

[aiseeya]

Just be upfront that this is your first hire and you would like to ask some qns. Clear communication is key. Never assume, always ask and clarifies where needed.

[+ SidewaysDM]

As someone who just recently had their first experience with a man, I will tell you what helped me tremendously. Once I narrowed down my search, with a handful of local providers, who were my type and had a fair amount of good reviews on RM. I checked them with Company of Men, to get some trusted reviews. After they passed that test, I paid for an hour of their regular rate to meet them in person. I only did this with 2 local providers. We had coffee or quick meal, and I was able to ask every imaginable question, and share my concerns about my first experience with a man. It also allowed me to see if we had a connection and real chemistry. I was able to find an awesome provider who has been kind, patient and loving, as I explore my sexuality with a man.This is not a conventional way go, and some of you will disagree with my method, but it sure worked well for me. I wish you the best with your journey. 

[DenverDad]

4 hours ago, SidewaysDM said:

As someone who just recently had their first experience with a man, I will tell you what helped me tremendously. Once I narrowed down my search, with a handful of local providers, who were my type and had a fair amount of good reviews on RM. I checked them with Company of Men, to get some trusted reviews. After they passed that test, I paid for an hour of their regular rate to meet them in person. I only did this with 2 local providers. We had coffee or quick meal, and I was able to ask every imaginable question, and share my concerns about my first experience with a man. It also allowed me to see if we had a connection and real chemistry. I was able to find an awesome provider who has been kind, patient and loving, as I explore my sexuality with a man.This is not a conventional way go, and some of you will disagree with my method, but it sure worked well for me. I wish you the best with your journey. 

Actually I think, if you can afford it, it is a great strategy to see if it is a good match. It is a bad analogy but kind of like a test drive. 

[+ KensingtonHomo]

39 minutes ago, DenverDad said:

Actually I think, if you can afford it, it is a great strategy to see if it is a good match. It is a bad analogy but kind of like a test drive. 

Agreed. If you’re planning to pursue this hobby, spending a little two do research can be a smart investment. 

[+ purplekow]

7 hours ago, aiseeya said:

Just be upfront that this is your first hire and you would like to ask some qns. Clear communication is key. Never assume, always ask and clarifies where needed.

It is a nice idea to hire someone for an hour just to meet.  For me though, I would hire for an hour, talk for 30 minutes and if there is no connection, call it a day and if there was a connection, I would pin him up against a wall and ravage him for 30 minutes.  

[JB_Studio38]

15 hours ago, DonVan said:

The overall vibe on RM feels very rushed — a lot of “I’m available right now.” That may be fine down the road, but for my first experience I’d really prefer to exchange a few emails and have a conversation first.

 

I try to separate from the “right now” brigade, and revolve mostly around pre-booking visits. However, I have occasionally suggested RM to exchange “available now” to available today. Even if I’m 2 blocks away, it still takes time to communicate, screen and get ready to accommodate a paying suitors requests. And for me, that’s usually been anywhere from 4 to 48+ hours notice. 

My only thing with exchanging a few emails: I have heard some reach out to multiple providers at once. Which of the 10 guys you exchanged 10 emails back and forth, gets the carrot 🥕? That may be why some try to meet right away.
 

Also, not everybody wants to do the back and forth email exchanges. I think more RMs would be open to do so if there was a paid incentive (one that can be used to cover ad costs and platinum boosts, etc per email inquiry session: like $10/$20).

Regardless, you are doing the right thing by not rushing to “meet now”. But you may want to say initially that you want to consider reserving time in advance, with a reasonable suggestion of when. 

Edited 15 hours ago by JB_Studio38

[Joeysf]

If it's your first time with a man...Why not get an erotic/sensual massage from someone with great reviews?  This will allow you to relax into the experience, feel what it's like to have a man's hands on your body (and maybe his body on your body)?  Go for a 90 minute session.  Work your way up to paid escorts!

[DonVan]

Thanks for all of the great advice. Yes, I would absolutely pay $10-$20 for emails exchanges. And as I mentioned about I am willing to pay more than normal once we session. Not sure what the average is, but I was thinking $1,200 for 2 hours. Not sure if that's high enough.  

[DenverDad]

17 minutes ago, DonVan said:

Thanks for all of the great advice. Yes, I would absolutely pay $10-$20 for emails exchanges. And as I mentioned about I am willing to pay more than normal once we session. Not sure what the average is, but I was thinking $1,200 for 2 hours. Not sure if that's high enough.  

$1200 for 2 hours seems very high but depends on where you are.  

[Nue2thegame]

20 minutes ago, DonVan said:

Thanks for all of the great advice. Yes, I would absolutely pay $10-$20 for emails exchanges. And as I mentioned about I am willing to pay more than normal once we session. Not sure what the average is, but I was thinking $1,200 for 2 hours. Not sure if that's high enough.  

Not sure where you are but that’s way above normal for anywhere in the US. Many, if not most, have provided exactly what you are seeking. I would go with their standard rate. You might tip them, if you feel the need to offer more. You should have your pick of many. Good luck with your pursuit. 

Edited 5 hours ago by Nue2thegame

[DonVan]

It would be NYC. 

[+ KensingtonHomo]

38 minutes ago, DonVan said:

It would be NYC. 

As a NYer, that is quite high for two hours. Most guys charge $350-$500 per hour and usually discount multiple hours. And unless you have a particular person in mind who does porn or has a huge OF, that's the range. Doing this hobby for about 7 years, I've never found paying more than that to be worth it. 

[pubic_assistance]

20 hours ago, SidewaysDM said:

I paid for an hour of their regular rate to meet them in person.

ABSOLUTELY. 💯

If you're just at the gates of exploration, do yourself a favor and invest in some intimate CONVERSATION first.

Never jump into bed with someone who you've never met and expect things to go as planned. Nothing worse than PAYING for a bad connection.

Meet, chat, laugh, enjoy and THEN book a session of more physical pleasures once you've decided there was a passionate human being behind those sexy photos.

 

Edited 3 hours ago by pubic_assistance
grammar

[+ SidewaysDM]

So brilliantly stated! Thank you! It reminds me of a provider in Houston. He is extremely friendly, tries to get to know you by a phone call or video chat, before the actual meeting. Then when you arrive he welcomes you warmly, you talk, laugh then he  and gives  a free 20 minute rub down, before the action begins! He gives the 20 minute free rub down, during each visit. Then chemistry, connection and the relaxing vibes, do their magic. That’s does equate into an awesome experience! Just that effort on the providers behalf, makes a world of difference, when connecting and making a client feel desired and valued. Truly, If every provider, handled their clients in this manner, we would be greatly satisfied and be coming back for more! 

[DenverDad]

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[+ KensingtonHomo]

1 hour ago, DenverDad said:

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[Gilfson]

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