Hiring an escort to meet out in public?

[Starlight77]

Has anyone hired a provider you already been with (I wouldn't do this with a new hire) to have them casually walk into  a bar that you are out with your friends and kind of stage a setup or role-play where he walks in to the bar and takes a seat next to you and "organically" start having a convo with him but its all planned out between you and him.   Then it escalates into becoming flirty with each other and hitting it off in front of your friends.   Ive been thinking about this when I go out with my straight friend and I'm his wingman getting him girls and he's hitting it off with them....I thought it might be kind of cool if he saw me hitting it off with some guy and taking him home with me....even if it's setup.   I'm just wondering how guilty I would feel lying to my best friend that it's not real and I'm paying the escort to do all that.     I hope this made sense.   

[afterfallhours1]

I've asked many providers this and 99% they would, I would just have to order their Uber. Plus you pay for the time they spend with you 

[+ ApexNomad]

40 minutes ago, Starlight77 said:

Has anyone hired a provider you already been with (I wouldn't do this with a new hire) to have them casually walk into  a bar that you are out with your friends and kind of stage a setup or role-play where he walks in to the bar and takes a seat next to you and "organically" start having a convo with him but its all planned out between you and him.   Then it escalates into becoming flirty with each other and hitting it off in front of your friends.   Ive been thinking about this when I go out with my straight friend and I'm his wingman getting him girls and he's hitting it off with them....I thought it might be kind of cool if he saw me hitting it off with some guy and taking him home with me....even if it's setup.   I'm just wondering how guilty I would feel lying to my best friend that it's not real and I'm paying the escort to do all that.     I hope this made sense.   

When it comes to working with a provider, it’s a professional relationship with clear boundaries. As long as communication is upfront, mutual consent is present, and financial terms are agreed upon, it’s an interaction you control.

The deeper question I think arises when you think about your best friend. You’ve gone from seeing it as a fun idea to feeling guilty about potentially lying to him. Does it matter to you that it’s not real? And how much do you value the relationship with him? Are you willing to risk the authenticity of that connection for the sake of a staged moment? Would he even care?

Another element is your desire to impress him. But what would truly impress him? Would he appreciate seeing you connect with someone genuinely?

If you’re willing to be his wingman, has he ever been willing to do the same for you in a gay bar? Maybe that’s where you can both see how real, fun interactions unfold naturally—without needing to stage anything or hide behind something that’s not true.

[Starlight77]

1 hour ago, ApexNomad said:

When it comes to working with a provider, it’s a professional relationship with clear boundaries. As long as communication is upfront, mutual consent is present, and financial terms are agreed upon, it’s an interaction you control.

The deeper question I think arises when you think about your best friend. You’ve gone from seeing it as a fun idea to feeling guilty about potentially lying to him. Does it matter to you that it’s not real? And how much do you value the relationship with him? Are you willing to risk the authenticity of that connection for the sake of a staged moment? Would he even care?

Another element is your desire to impress him. But what would truly impress him? Would he appreciate seeing you connect with someone genuinely?

If you’re willing to be his wingman, has he ever been willing to do the same for you in a gay bar? Maybe that’s where you can both see how real, fun interactions unfold naturally—without needing to stage anything or hide behind something that’s not true.

I appreciate these questions alot because they are making me think.    

I guess when I thought about this idea,  it didn't matter it wasn't real but I do value my friendship with him and I guess I don't feel great about essentially lying to him because he would much rather see me connect with someone genuine.    But yea,  there is this desire to impress him.    Do I have feelings for my straight best friend.  Of course I do.   I guess thats why I thought this would be a interesting idea,  to not think about wanting him and for one night be distracted with a guy coming into the bar to talk to me.   

There are not a lot of gay bars in my area.  We have gone to one together.   Admittedly my friend is a very attractive man so when we did go, the guys were much more interested in him.     It's just a lot easier for me to get him girls than it is for him to get me guys.   

[+ DrownedBoy]

1 hour ago, ApexNomad said:

The deeper question I think arises when you think about your best friend. 

Another element is your desire to impress him.

These 2 points.

[acks0104]

It just really depends on what you want and what you care about. Personally, I would not do this because I don't think it's worth paying a guy $300 to talk to me at a bar nor do I care enough to try and impress other people with a setup like this. 

[Starlight77]

1 minute ago, acks0104 said:

It just really depends on what you want and what you care about. Personally, I would not do this because I don't think it's worth paying a guy $300 to talk to me at a bar nor do I care enough to try and impress other people with a setup like this. 

I would have him come back to my place to complete the "date".   it wouldn't JUST be the bar.    And good for you.   But for me, it's quite enticing .   

[pubic_assistance]

2 hours ago, Starlight77 said:

I hope this made sense.   

No it doesn't.

It's totally cringe.

[Vin Marco]

Oh boy do I have a story about this.... lol it's almost unbelievable but "we" pulled it off  beautifully!!!!!! Anyone care to hear the story? 

[+ ApexNomad]

26 minutes ago, Starlight77 said:

I appreciate these questions alot because they are making me think.    

I guess when I thought about this idea,  it didn't matter it wasn't real but I do value my friendship with him and I guess I don't feel great about essentially lying to him because he would much rather see me connect with someone genuine.    But yea,  there is this desire to impress him.    Do I have feelings for my straight best friend.  Of course I do.   I guess thats why I thought this would be a interesting idea,  to not think about wanting him and for one night be distracted with a guy coming into the bar to talk to me.   

There are not a lot of gay bars in my area.  We have gone to one together.   Admittedly my friend is a very attractive man so when we did go, the guys were much more interested in him.     It's just a lot easier for me to get him girls than it is for him to get me guys.   

I don’t think you need to impress him or stage something to prove anything. It sounds like he values you for who you are, and a genuine connection will mean so much more than anything planned.

You’re welcome to hire for whatever reason you want (again, as long as you communicate your needs and everyone’s on the same page), but you don’t need to go through this whole exercise for your straight best friend. Why not instead use the opportunity to have some sexual fun with the provider or maybe, if you’re so inclined, even fantasize they’re your straight friend to help you process those feelings?

Friendships are invaluable, and it’s not worth risking yours over something that isn’t real. If I may, there’s something truly special about a genuine platonic gay/straight friendship. One of my closest and dearest friends is straight, and I wouldn’t risk that bond for anything.

[+ ApexNomad]

34 minutes ago, Vin Marco said:

Oh boy do I have a story about this.... lol it's almost unbelievable but "we" pulled it off  beautifully!!!!!! Anyone care to hear the story? 

I would love to hear your story!

[acks0104]

47 minutes ago, Starlight77 said:

I would have him come back to my place to complete the "date".   it wouldn't JUST be the bar.    And good for you.   But for me, it's quite enticing .   

So then you're ditching your friend to go have fun with an escort. It doesn't sound like you're there to be his wing man but there to have him be impressed that someone is pretending to want to hook up with you.

[Vin Marco]

56 minutes ago, ApexNomad said:

I would love to hear your story!

First of all, I just would like to say that the OP's fantasy is a little more common than most would think...  I've been told many times that it would be so cool to meet at a bar and have me come in a bit later, sit down next to, strike up a conversation and after a few drinks leave together...  not necessarily around someone's friends, but just people in a bar in general...  it's a fantasy I've heard many times and it get it.... 
Here's where my story comes in.... years ago someone that Zeb Atlas and I used to travel together with threw  a 50th birthday party for his partner.....  he flew out like 12 of their closest friends to Las Vegas and put them all up in hotel rooms for a weekend.. he had the clever idea to hire two male strippers to "entertain" this dozen. His partner knew about us and the travel but he didn't want anyone else to know just how "familiar" we were... in fact we were told to pretend that we knew no one...  I remember Zeb and I waiting in the bar  downstairs  at the Wynn waiting for the green light 🚦 ( a text to cum up )  everything went according to plan and this particular suite had a massage room, and we took each and everyone of his guests in there to give private...... even the few shy ones got an opportunity to be not so shy 🤣  I think the whole ordeal lasted two +  hours. Everybody was super happy and the wonderful part of the story is that years later he came clean to every single person that was there....  after he retired, I suppose he felt a bit more comfortable coming clean.  He says those that were in attendance still talk about that night years later and my dear friends now hubby says it's probably his most memorable birthday 🎉 party 🎈 The funny part was that a few of them said they had a recognized us from the Internet 🛜  😜

Edited December 20, 2024 by Vin Marco

[+ ApexNomad]

10 minutes ago, Vin Marco said:

First of all, I just would like to say that the OP's fantasy is a little more common than most would think...  I've been told many times that it would be so cool to meet at a bar and have me come in a bit later, sit down next to, strike up a conversation and after a few drinks leave together...  not necessarily around someone's friends, but just people in a bar in general...  it's a fantasy I've heard many times and it get it.... 
Here's where my story comes in.... years ago someone that Zeb Atlas and I used to travel together with threw  a 50th birthday party for his partner.....  he flew out like 12 of their closest friends to Las Vegas and put them all up in hotel rooms for a weekend.. he had the clever idea to hire two male strippers to "entertain" this dozen. His partner knew about us and the travel but he didn't want anyone else to know just how "familiar" we were... in fact we were told to pretend that we knew no one...  I remember Zeb and I waiting in the bar  downstairs  at the Wynn waiting for the green light 🚦 ( a text to cum up )  everything went according to plan and this particular suite had a massage room, and we took each and everyone of his guests in there to give private...... even the shy few ones got an opportunity to be not so shy 🤣  I think the whole ordeal lasted two +  hours. Everybody was super happy and the wonderful part of the story is that years later he came clean to every single person that was there....  after he retired, I suppose he felt a bit more comfortable coming clean.  He says those that were in attendance still talk about that night years later and my dear friends now hubby says it's probably his most memorable birthday 🎉 party 🎈 The funny part was that a few of them said they had a recognized us from the Internet 🛜  😜

I can definitely see the appeal of that—kind of like showing up to a high school reunion and leaving with the hottest guy in the room. That would be funny!

And what a fantastic way to celebrate a 50th! It sounds like a memorable and bold way to mark the occasion. I bet that night will be talked about for years to come!

[Starlight77]

59 minutes ago, acks0104 said:

So then you're ditching your friend to go have fun with an escort. It doesn't sound like you're there to be his wing man but there to have him be impressed that someone is pretending to want to hook up with you.

He would ditch me in a second if he hit it off with a hot girl to go have sex with her.  and I would be happy for him 

[Starlight77]

1 hour ago, ApexNomad said:

I don’t think you need to impress him or stage something to prove anything. It sounds like he values you for who you are, and a genuine connection will mean so much more than anything planned.

You’re welcome to hire for whatever reason you want (again, as long as you communicate your needs and everyone’s on the same page), but you don’t need to go through this whole exercise for your straight best friend. Why not instead use the opportunity to have some sexual fun with the provider or maybe, if you’re so inclined, even fantasize they’re your straight friend to help you process those feelings?

Friendships are invaluable, and it’s not worth risking yours over something that isn’t real. If I may, there’s something truly special about a genuine platonic gay/straight friendship. One of my closest and dearest friends is straight, and I wouldn’t risk that bond for anything.

Thank you.  And thank you for not being judgey like other commenters on this thread.  It's shocking to me on a forum where we discuss paying men for sex.  

[Vin Marco]

@Starlight77That's why it was important for me to let you know that it's quite common. I'm not exaggerating when I I say I've heard it many times.  And if it was something that was going to fulfill a fantasy, no harm done and it's fun,  I would be happy to do it over and over 🙂 

Edited December 20, 2024 by Vin Marco

[acks0104]

38 minutes ago, Starlight77 said:

He would ditch me in a second if he hit it off with a hot girl to go have sex with her.  and I would be happy for him 

Sure, but you were the one who pointed out that you were doing this as a favor to your friend. If your fantasy is to hire a guy to flirt with you to impress your friend, that's what it is. You made it sound like it was some kind of altruistic thing and a funny little "haha" to have this done.

Literally no one here has told you not to do this. People are just giving their input on why they would or wouldn't. It's always going to be your choice at the end of the day

[TonyDown]

For all the $$ you're going to spend,

why not just take your favorite provider out, for a real boyfriend experience?   Treat him like a king.

Sure, you could meet up with your straight friend.  But pretending to pick up a hottie to fool your friend ...yeah I don't know.   Why not just let your friend know your date will be joining?

When you look back on that evening, which scenario might be your better memory?   

But yeah, maybe you and your straight friend like to play games, a couple of tricksters, then yeah, you do you. 👍

[BuffaloKyle]

19 minutes ago, TonyDown said:

For all the $$ you're going to spend,

why not just take your favorite provider out, for a real boyfriend experience?   Treat him like a king.

You have a point. You could maybe just find a sexy guy on grindr and ask him to do this roleplay scenario for a whole lot less money. 😅

Edited December 20, 2024 by BuffaloKyle

[Hen]

I did this once when my husband had expressed interest in hiring but had shied away from actually committing the act. I did not bring it up again for half a year then devised a scenario with an escort when we were in San Diego. I had the escort "meet" us in a hotel cocktail bar and really start flirting with my BF. I even played along that I was not interested in a 3-way but he kept saying "I can tell this guy is so into me". I finally relented and a good time was that by all I had slipped the cash in the bathroom for the escort to pick up as he left. I of course did tell my BF when the deed was finished. He loved it. Yes, it wasn't cheap (750) but it was fun to do once!

[+ purplekow]

If a hot guy came up and started hitting on me in front of friends, most of them would see right through that.   

There is a Friends episode where Raj and Leonard take Walowitz to Las Vegas and arrange for him to have a "Jesish Girlfriend Experience".  They are at a buffet and Walowitz has been lured there from his room with the idea that there are "shrimp the size of a baby's arm".  and a woman enters and complains about the buffet and asks if it would be too much to have a nice brisket.  Walowitz immediatly perks up and goes and starts talking with the girl.  She introduces herslef as something like Ester Rosenblatt and as they are talking, Walowitz stops and walks over to his friends and asks if they arranged for the hooker.  They sheepishly say yes.  He irritatedly asked if they have already paid and they again say yes.  He then says:  "Thank you" and runs back to the woman.  

 

Edited December 20, 2024 by purplekow

[MikeBiDude]

1 hour ago, purplekow said:

There is a Friends episode where Raj and Leonard take Walowitz to Las Vegas

I’m guessing you mean “Big Bang Theory”?

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

21 hours ago, Starlight77 said:

Thank you.  And thank you for not being judgey like other commenters on this thread.  It's shocking to me on a forum where we discuss paying men for sex.  

I agree.  This is the last place someone should judge you.

But we have a contingent of people here who use the anonymous nature of this board to make themselves feel important by shitting on others.

You do you.  It's your time, your money.  

If it makes you happy, it can't be that bad.

 

Edited December 21, 2024 by BenjaminNicholas

[+ Jamie21]

I think it’s just people sounding caution about deceiving a friend. The plan sounds like it could backfire if it ruins the friendship. 

I got hired for something similar, to hit on a guy at a sauna. He was tired of being ignored so hired me to be with him exclusively at a gay sauna. It worked fine and he had a great time. It gave him confidence to be more proactive when he visits the sauna now. Difference was that we weren’t misleading a friend. I think if the plan works that’s great, no judgement, but if he loses a friend as a result of it then he might look back and regret it.