Age and attitudes on nudity

[MikeThomas]

12 hours ago, Rod Hagen said:

Apart from runners, men in Gay Neighborhoods are shirtless publicly much less often than in the past.  20 years ago we used to work out shirtless inside the West Hollywood Athletic Club.  Men at the climbing gyms never used to wear a shirt, now they nearly all do.

Always loved the showers at The Athletic Club.

[marylander1940]

On 10/25/2024 at 2:33 PM, jeezifonly said:

The United States of Prudery 

We are so fucked up about nudity. 

Also no PSA...

[Rod Hagen]

On 10/26/2024 at 10:34 AM, misterhumphries said:

Shirtless gyms? That is so unsanitary. I do not look forward to laying down for a bench press where some shirtless knucklehead has sweated and left a dose of his dead skin cells and bacteria. No!

This makes no sense. Sweat is low risk.  Also if wearing shorts, presumably you'll rest your legs where someone just parked their legs, but you do mind their backs. What's the diff.?  It all comes down to our often imbalanced disgust.  Read this, it's VERY good:  

How Disgust Explains Everything - The New York Times

WWW.NYTIMES.COM

---

For psychologists who study it, disgust is one of the primal emotions that define — and explain — humanity.

 

Edited October 28, 2024 by Rod Hagen

[misterhumphries]

1 hour ago, Rod Hagen said:

This makes no sense. Sweat is low risk.  

 How Disgust Explains Everything - The New York Times

WWW.NYTIMES.COMFor psychologists who study it, disgust is one of the primal emotions that define — and explain — humanity.

 

When you get your degree in epidemiology, I may take  your opinion under consideration. 

Until then, I do not want to patronize a gym that allowed anyone's naked skin on benches and dismisses it as "low risk". As long as the word "risk" is involved, it's up to me to determine how much of it I'm willing to encounter.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

42 minutes ago, misterhumphries said:

When you get your degree in epidemiology, I may take  your opinion under consideration. 

Until then, I do not want to patronize a gym that allowed anyone's naked skin on benches and dismisses it as "low risk". As long as the word "risk" is involved, it's up to me to determine how much of it I'm willing to encounter.

Jesus, you're being a priss. 

I bet you're a real hit at parties and cocktail conversation. 

[Guest]

Oddly enough, I've gone through my own journey with nudity. I'm generally predisposed to to link sexuality with nudity, but that can definitely be attributed to escorting and stripping for a number of years. As a fresh 21 year old, I was afraid of "losing" my body and would develop insecurities around it and social nudity (or even partial nudity) became complicated. But as I mature and grow, I view my body as its own perfect thing to respect and cherish. Life happens whether one likes it or not, and we only get one of these! 

 

Cut to me now being naked in random places and practically refusing to wear pants in Palm Springs last year.

[Monarchy79]

On 10/26/2024 at 4:35 PM, ApexNomad said:

For men, especially in gay culture, it’s often the endowment that becomes the hang-up. But you reach an age where you stop giving a shit about any of your insecurities—and that’s where real confidence begins.

Facts. 

And guys who are “ growers”, especially  hate nude environments.  

There has been an extreme obsession with penis size that has gotten to a point where it crosses sexual orientation. 

Go to a gym and change clothes and strip bare and you’ll find many men of all background either staring are your dick, or intentionally flashing theirs.

I’ll admit that I’m one of those “towel” guys that nudists seem to hate. However, for a week, I decided to let it all out…. Strip down after my workout, throw the towel over my shoulder and walk to the shower butterball naked.  This guy whose locker was always near mine, literally started at my dick  the entire time.  And the whole vibe he gave was “Finally!!  I finally got to see your dick!!” it was cringey as hell. Oh, and now he strikes up a conversation  with me every time he sees me. 

People would be more comfortable naked, if others had more social grace and didn’t ogle and stare at others so aggressively. 
 

 

 

 

[+ sniper]

It's several things combining. Schools used to make kids shower( I suspect that was a backdoor public health requirement - some didn't have access to a shower at home and just making everyone shower got those kids clean without singling them out) so more people "got over it" earlier. Also with larger families back in the day most kids shared bedrooms and changing in front of someone else was not an unusual occurrence. But also increased awareness of "the gays" likely did lead some guys to cover up more. Schools stopped making kids shower, then they carried their hangups with them to college and because college is now a consumer experience, market forces took out the gang showers. So most guys get to their mid 20s never having been naked in front of someone.

[Ali Gator]

I have been friends with a guy half my age for the past two years (he's 30). Despite our age gap, we have so much in common (though I'm gay, he says he's straight but I do think he's at least 'bicurious' due to his questions some times).  He's very cute and has a nice, slender six foot body (never goes to the gym, so not muscular, but loves to run). A great personality, and he's the whole package.

A few weeks ago, we were in his condo waiting for a pizza to be delivered and we started talking about tattoos (we came across some reality show on TV about a tattoo artist). He mentioned he had just gotten a small one a few months earlier on his grandmother's birthday, who passed away earlier this year. He said it was a tat of a horseshoe, as his granny loved horses and loved watching 'the races' on TV. 

Of course, I asked to see the tattoo and he just pointed towards his heart. I asked again to see it, and he told me he was 'uncomfortable' taking his shirt off in front of other guys. I convinced him it was just the two of us in his condo and there was nothing to be uncomfortable about. Finally, he relented and took his shirt off.  What a fine chest he has (naturally shaped, not gym-shaped) and the tattoo was perfect - not distracting. I complimented him on his tattoo and on his naturally smooth body- let him know he should take his shirt off more often, as he has nothing to be ashamed of. "You're a handsome guy with a great body - share it with the world when you can."  I told him his smooth chest  looks great on him - especially with his beautiful head of hair and his facial scruff. I think he really needed that compliment as some kind of self-assurance. (He did tell me he was rather self-conscious about not having hair on his chest like other Italian guys). I told him to listen to me - his gay friend - he's one sexy dude. Again, he really needed to hear that.

So maybe next time we have dinner at his condo (which is every few months) I can coax him into sitting around without his shirt on. Who knows ? Maybe the pants will come off next. 

 

[+ ApexNomad]

56 minutes ago, Ali Gator said:

I have been friends with a guy half my age for the past two years (he's 30). Despite our age gap, we have so much in common (though I'm gay, he says he's straight but I do think he's at least 'bicurious' due to his questions some times).  He's very cute and has a nice, slender six foot body (never goes to the gym, so not muscular, but loves to run). A great personality, and he's the whole package.

A few weeks ago, we were in his condo waiting for a pizza to be delivered and we started talking about tattoos (we came across some reality show on TV about a tattoo artist). He mentioned he had just gotten a small one a few months earlier on his grandmother's birthday, who passed away earlier this year. He said it was a tat of a horseshoe, as his granny loved horses and loved watching 'the races' on TV. 

Of course, I asked to see the tattoo and he just pointed towards his heart. I asked again to see it, and he told me he was 'uncomfortable' taking his shirt off in front of other guys. I convinced him it was just the two of us in his condo and there was nothing to be uncomfortable about. Finally, he relented and took his shirt off.  What a fine chest he has (naturally shaped, not gym-shaped) and the tattoo was perfect - not distracting. I complimented him on his tattoo and on his naturally smooth body- let him know he should take his shirt off more often, as he has nothing to be ashamed of. "You're a handsome guy with a great body - share it with the world when you can."  I told him his smooth chest  looks great on him - especially with his beautiful head of hair and his facial scruff. I think he really needed that compliment as some kind of self-assurance. (He did tell me he was rather self-conscious about not having hair on his chest like other Italian guys). I told him to listen to me - his gay friend - he's one sexy dude. Again, he really needed to hear that.

So maybe next time we have dinner at his condo (which is every few months) I can coax him into sitting around without his shirt on. Who knows ? Maybe the pants will come off next. 

 

As the older guy and his gay friend to his young, straight/bi-curious friend, I think it’s important to keep things grounded and not steer the vibe toward anything that could feel awkward for him. He mentioned feeling uncomfortable taking his shirt off, and that should have been respected as the end of it. It sounds like he really trusts and values you for the encouragement you’ve given him about his body and confidence. To keep that trust intact, focus on the great connection you already have. There’s no need to coax him into anything beyond what he’s comfortable with. Being a real friend and valuing him for who he is will mean so much more in the long run.

[+ sniper]

You went on a little too long in the encouragement there IMO. Probably spooked him. Gotta keep it short and move on. "Good grief if I looked like you I'd never wear a shirt!"

[Vin Marco]

On 10/26/2024 at 8:58 AM, BenjaminNicholas said:

If you're lucky, you get to a point in life where you just accept who you are.  You stop doubting, picking apart and finding fault with what you see. 

It's what I call the 'fuck all' moment.

 

 

[Nightowl]

Gym class in high school or participation in team sports used to get you used to being naked around other guys. As schools drop gym class requirements, a lot of guys never have that experience and are shy about their bodies.  Add cell phones and the fear of dick pics being surreptitiously posted, and nudity in the locker room becomes a risk.At the gym I go to hardly anyone strips down completely in the locker room and those that do tend to be over 40.  I wonder if part of the shyness is our current culture where every body is expected to be firm and every male is expected to sport a cock that is only seen in porn.  After the age of 40, a lot of guys don’t give a fuck who sees them or what their body looks like.  The ability to throw away any concern about what others think is liberating.  I’m over 50 and I get naked at any opportunity.

[+ sniper]

It is kind of funny they're all sending each other dick pics but are afraid to change in front of each other.

[+ ApexNomad]

1 minute ago, sniper said:

It is kind of funny they're all sending each other dick pics but are afraid to change in front of each other.

Sadly the screen for some feels more real than in the flesh. Different generation.

[nate1090]

11 hours ago, sniper said:

It is kind of funny they're all sending each other dick pics but are afraid to change in front of each other.

So true.  Previous gym had open showers saw younger guy showering in boxers...

[borgerback]

All of my friends who are the least modest (or the least hung up about casual nudity) were either in jail or the military.  

Having said that, one of my closer buddies who was in the Marine Corps takes FOREVER to get ready; and when anyone complains about it, willingly shares that he was rushed so much from boot camp on through most of his deployments, that he considers it his right to take all the time he wants to get ready.   

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

If you want to quickly get used to being naked for long periods of time, I'd suggest visiting a Kspa.

You'll get over it within the first five minutes.  Then, it feels perfectly normal.

I've taken several friends who thought they'd hate it, but ended up loving the experience.

[Rudynate]

It's comical to watch young guys changing at the gym - they wrap a towel around their waist, and then drop their shorts or workout pants, while carefully holding onto the towel.  Then they put their underwear on, still holding onto the towel, then to put their pants on, they turn away from anyone who may be looking and slip into their pants.   Is this a result of helicopter parenting?  Most just don't even change at the gym.  They show up dressed to work out and don't go anywhere near the locker room.

[Rudynate]

4 minutes ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

If you want to quickly get used to being naked for long periods of time, I'd suggest visiting a Kspa.

You'll get over it within the first five minutes.  Then, it feels perfectly normal.

I've taken several friends who thought they'd hate it, but ended up loving the experience.

I got used to it in a flash many years ago on Mykonos.  I walked to the extreme end of Paradise Beach, where I wasn't surrounded by people, and got undressed as fast as I could, so not to lose my nerve.  As soon as I was undressed,  I realized it wasn't any big deal.  That was it.

[borgerback]

2 hours ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

If you want to quickly get used to being naked for long periods of time, I'd suggest visiting a Kspa.

You'll get over it within the first five minutes.  Then, it feels perfectly normal.

I've taken several friends who thought they'd hate it, but ended up loving the experience.

This has been exactly my experience.  My friends needed about 10 min to get over themselves/get comfortable.

Having said that, I've had two friends that remained uncomfortable enough that they have not wanted to go back; but everyone else has become an enthusiastic fan.

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

2 hours ago, borgerback said:

This has been exactly my experience.  My friends needed about 10 min to get over themselves/get comfortable.

Having said that, I've had two friends that remained uncomfortable enough that they have not wanted to go back; but everyone else has become an enthusiastic fan.

The fun thing about the environment is that it's not really in-your-face sexual, but since it's all naked guys, there's something inherently sexy about it. 

It's a gigantic tease without being as overt as a gay bath.

I also tend to pick my group carefully when it comes to inviting them to Kspa.  Not everyone is cut out for it.

The really fun part is scheduling the virgins a scrub and seeing how they fare  

 

[borgerback]

1 hour ago, BenjaminNicholas said:

The really fun part is scheduling the virgins a scrub and seeing how they fare  

This!  That was actually my first experience when I was taken by a buddy - and it was wild!  But I love it.  No more than once or twice a year.

[CuriousByNature]

On 10/27/2024 at 10:21 PM, misterhumphries said:

When you get your degree in epidemiology, I may take  your opinion under consideration. 

Until then, I do not want to patronize a gym that allowed anyone's naked skin on benches and dismisses it as "low risk". As long as the word "risk" is involved, it's up to me to determine how much of it I'm willing to encounter.

The concept of a shirtless gym wouldn't bother me, because in every situation I think we need to be responsible for our own safety and level of comfort.  I generally assume the previous person may not have wiped the bench, so I normally wipe it before and after using it myself.  

 

Edited January 3 by CuriousByNature

[Rudynate]

1 hour ago, CuriousByNature said:

The concept of a shirtless gym wouldn't bother me, because in every situation I think we need to be responsible for our own safety and level of comfort.  I generally assume the previous person may not have wiped the bench, so I normally wipe it before and after using it myself.  

 

I didn't know they had them.  I would join a shirtless gym. It's such a pleasure pumping iron with no shirt on.