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Posted

I have no idea if this is in the right place... Feel free to move it.

I don't have any kids, nor nieces and nephews. My dearest straight friend has kids; it is the first graduation. I think the best gift is cash, but I'm lost on the appropriate amount for an HS graduation. If I had $20 a million years ago, I would have been ecstatic, but that barely does anything today. Any thoughts?

Posted

In recent years I have given my nieces and nephews $150 for HS graduation and $250 for college graduation.  I see all of them fairly regularly so I am part of their lives.  I have no idea what Miss Manners would say, but it's an amount with which I feel comfortable. 

Posted
3 minutes ago, Act25 said:

In recent years I have given my nieces and nephews $150 for HS graduation and $250 for college graduation.  I see all of them fairly regularly so I am part of their lives.  I have no idea what Miss Manners would say, but it's an amount with which I feel comfortable. 

Did similarly with my niece and nephew for HS & her college.  Fortunately, their grandfather died and left them both a decent chunk of change a few years ago, so (since I just lost my part-time job & have to get by on disability) I had no problem giving my nephew a hug in lieu of cash last week when he graduated college (with a degree in cannabis management... just what my sister had dreamed of when he was a baby).

It was his own fault he missed out on the gift she got...  he's 3 1/2 years older, but took 10 years to graduate... partly due to cannabis, ironically...

Posted

HS? I’d probably go $250.

College? $1,000

Obviously, it’s a very personal decision though. I believe education (especially college) is incredibly important. 

Posted
4 hours ago, ericwinters said:

If I had $20 a million years ago, I would have been ecstatic, but that barely does anything today. Any thoughts?

 

4 hours ago, samhexum said:

I just lost my part-time job & have to get by on disability

Yes, you are out of your mind and/or hopelessly out of touch.

Posted (edited)

It really depends on your finances.  I just went for a casual dinner at Outback Steakhouse.  Nothing fancy and I was by myself.  Wound up costing $75 without alcohol.  So, figure out if this person is a one dinner two dinner or 5 dinner friend and calculate accordingly based on your budget 

Edited by purplekow
Posted

I personally think that the whole concept of graduation is kind of silly (“congrats, you did the minimum to pass… now let’s have your family travel potentially crazy distances to watch you walk across a stage while someone says your name”), but I do think that there is a societal expectation around a decent gift, so I’d say $100 bare minimum.

Posted
3 hours ago, ShortCutie7 said:

I personally think that the whole concept of graduation is kind of silly (“congrats, you did the minimum to pass… now let’s have your family travel potentially crazy distances to watch you walk across a stage while someone says your name”), but I do think that there is a societal expectation around a decent gift, so I’d say $100 bare minimum.

I had a small high school class (less than 20).  I observed at my high school graduation that the number of family/friends in the audience for each graduate was inversely proportional to the graduate's GPA.  The students who struggled the most, and likewise are still struggling 20 years later, are the ones whose parents hosted the biggest graduation parties and invited the neighborhood.  The students who graduated with honors had only immediate family present.  I graduated high school at the top of my class 20 years ago and received a small gift from my parents (cost $25) that I remember well and still have.

Posted (edited)
10 hours ago, ericwinters said:

I have no idea if this is in the right place... Feel free to move it.

I don't have any kids, nor nieces and nephews. My dearest straight friend has kids; it is the first graduation. I think the best gift is cash, but I'm lost on the appropriate amount for an HS graduation. If I had $20 a million years ago, I would have been ecstatic, but that barely does anything today. Any thoughts?

Be sure to give a physical greeting card.  Years later, the money or gift will be gone, but they may still have the card as a memory.  I still have the Congratulations cards I received for my high school and university graduations (unlike most birthday and Christmas cards, which I tend to discard).

Edited by Vegas_Millennial
Posted
6 minutes ago, Vegas_Millennial said:

I graduated high school at the top of my class 20 years ago and received a small gift from my parents (cost $25) that I remember well and still have.

E-Z Bake Ovens cost that much that long ago?

Posted

If it were my dearest straight friend, I would ask them about the gift. Having had a significant gap between my own graduation, and the time I was invited friends kids' and relatives' graduations, and then another significant second gap before my next round, I simply asked my friends and siblings what the "going rate" was.

My guess is that your close friend knows a bit of your financial situation. Seems likely that if you're close, that they will neither put you in a financial bind, nor will they fleece you on behalf of their kid when they throw out numbers.

Posted
12 hours ago, Act25 said:

In recent years I have given my nieces and nephews $150 for HS graduation and $250 for college graduation.  I see all of them fairly regularly so I am part of their lives.  I have no idea what Miss Manners would say, but it's an amount with which I feel comfortable. 

I like these #s.

2 hours ago, Vegas_Millennial said:

The students who struggled the most, and likewise are still struggling 20 years later, are the ones whose parents hosted the biggest graduation parties and invited the neighborhood.  The students who graduated with honors had only immediate family present. 

This makes sense, doesn't it? For those who struggled, graduation is a real accomplishment and ought to be celebrated, shouldn't it? For those for whom it was more of a foregone conclusion:

Ghost World

Posted
21 minutes ago, Vegas_Millennial said:

Yes, mine was a tie tack.  I wear it only on special occasions (job interview and weddings)

Good for you for still having it.  Tie tacks are the kind of item that gets lost very easily. You must value it greatly to have mnaged to not drop it, leave it in a tie and forget about it, put it in a pocket and leave it there, put it on a bureau and have it fall behind it or any one of a dozen other mishaps.  

Posted

Know his interest, Mr. Crazy Uncle, and get him something pertaining to what that is. A little effort put into a gift to brighten someone's day along with a thoughtful note with a humorous touch goes a long way. If he happens to not have a sense of humor, help by getting a card with a squirting flower. 

Posted

I’m going to sound like a really old person, but I give the graduate an engraved pen with their initials. For high school, I do the gold plated Cross pen (about $150). For college I do an engraved  Montblanc (not the crazy expensive ones). No one really writes anymore but it feels sort of scholarly.  I know they would rather have cash, and a pen is the equivalent of socks for Christmas, but hopefully these might be a keepsake that reminds them of their academic accomplishment. I always get a thank you note that they say is written with the very pen so I know it gets used once. 

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