Grindr Rant

[Pd1_jap]

Hi guys, just need to vent about how horrible Grindr is. 

I recently reinstalled the app and started browsing. Even though I'm a big guy I get a lot of messages and taps. I try my best to get back to everyone and have a real conversation. After a month, I could not hookup with anyone. Many guys chatted me up and even more tap me but it just leads no where. Endless fucking convos asking for more and more pics and it never leads anywhere. Even guys who say they want to meet up RN flake like Kelloggs. I know I'm not everyone's dream man/boy but why contact me in the first place? I don't try and his my body. I make it pretty clear what my body type is and my age.

Is this happening to anyone else?

[Act25]

My bitch is with the scammers.  They use a pic of a cute Asian guy so of course I respond.  Sometimes I play with them like a cat with a mouse until I get bored.  I now can dispatch them pretty fast but still a waste of time. 

In general, once the scammers are removed from the equation, Grindr has worked fairly well for me.  The cutest guy I ever hooked up with was a 20yr old from Grindr and I'm now 67.  My best luck has just been being online and letting those interested reach out to me. 

[BuffaloKyle]

I rarely have free time to hook up so when I do I prefer to hire rather than have my time wasted anymore on regular hookup sites. My final straw one day was when a guy I chatted with showed up ten years older it looked like than his pics, much heavier, reeking of smoke, and missing teeth.

[Simon Suraci]

Yikes. 😳 Another stroke on the scoreboard for hiring. Yes there are positives and negatives to hookups and hires, but by and large, hiring offers a lot of value for a lot of people. 

Get what you want, with who you want, when you want. No muss, no fuss.

[BuffaloKyle]

Yes indeed @Simon Suraci! Now of course a provider could show up and not look like his pics as well but that's why I tend to stick to well reviewed ones.

[Guest]

I've never feared it for competition for what I do or any of the other hook up apps and sites. However, I have a friend in Los Angeles, who no longer uses Grindr as he calls it a "hostile" environment he says people can be brutally mean on Grindr

[+ nycman]

You need thick skin if you’re going to play in the Grindr et al. sandbox.

People are cruel. And if you care, you’ll get hurt. 

No…like seriously THICK skin.

Over the years I can remember exactly two "really fun" hook ups from the apps. That’s a really shitty return on the huge time investment. Not to mention the tremendous ego damage.

Just hire. It’s so much easier. 

[caramelsub]

46 minutes ago, Simon Suraci said:

Yikes. 😳 Another stroke on the scoreboard for hiring. Yes there are positives and negatives to hookups and hires, but by and large, hiring offers a lot of value for a lot of people. 

Get what you want, with who you want, when you want. No muss, no fuss.

Yep. Hiring is not just for the guys who are too old or unattractive or can’t get laid without paying someone. There are so many reasons why I prefer hiring over grindr. 

[Guest]

Agree; providers more likely to be:

1. Community vetted/recommended

2. Professional

3. Skilled

4. Client-centered

5. Healthy

6. Safe

[+ BenjaminNicholas]

Grindr serves its purpose, but as was said above, you have to take the whole thing with a grain of salt.

If you don't or can't, you shouldn't be on Grindr.

It's like watching satire and taking it seriously.  Just no.

[SouthOfTheBorder]

1 hour ago, Simon Suraci said:

Yes there are positives and negatives to hookups and hires, but by and large, hiring offers a lot of value for a lot of people. 

Get what you want, with who you want, when you want. No muss, no fuss.

As is true with most things - you get what you pay for.  “Free” isn’t free when you’ve wasted hours & then disappointed.  And then there are the predators, with bad intentions.

Not worth it.  I stick with providers only these days & it’s so much easier. I can’t remember the last time I was disappointed w a provider. 

[Simon Suraci]

13 minutes ago, SouthOfTheBorder said:

“Free” isn’t free when you’ve wasted hours & then disappointed.

Agree 💯 

[marylander1940]

2 hours ago, caramelsub said:

Yep. Hiring is not just for the guys who are too old or unattractive or can’t get laid without paying someone. There are so many reasons why I prefer hiring over grindr. 

Certainly "Grindr fatigue" is here to stay!

 

[+ Coolwave35]

5 hours ago, BuffaloKyle said:

I rarely have free time to hook up so when I do I prefer to hire rather than have my time wasted anymore on regular hookup sites. My final straw one day was when a guy I chatted with showed up ten years older it looked like than his pics, much heavier, reeking of smoke, and missing teeth.

How was the sex? 

[pubic_assistance]

7 hours ago, Pd1_jap said:

Many guys chatted me up and even more tap me but it just leads no where

Grindr is notorious for flakes who are sitting at home jerking-off and seeking momentary validation.

Maybe 1/5th of the guys on there will actually show up for a meet.

Your lack of success is primarily due to the nature of the platform which is focused on instant gratification and anonymous sex, leading to some strange behaviors.

 

[alrajee]

Hear, hear.

I was in Europe for two months, going through 7 countries. Of the number of times I had sex, only a third were from Grindr. (And this is with me showing my face and a relatively fit body.)

I’d set up with someone for after his work, and once I ask if we’re still on, I get blocked.

To be fair, the hookups that did happen were at least good, and a few were great that we met up again.

The worst offenders for me were the major cities: London, Brussels, Paris, and Copenhagen. I ended up hiring at these four because it was easier.

[BuffaloKyle]

10 hours ago, Coolwave35 said:

How was the sex? 

[EZEtoGRU]

Grindr is for the young and handsome/pretty.  It seems to work much better if you're in a big city.  Having said that, it's mostly a waste a time for me.  I am honest in showing my actual body and age and, as others have mentioned, I let other's reach out to me if they are interested.  It very rarely leads to a connection.

I am SO HAPPY, I grew up in an era when there were no smartphones.  The hook-up spots were campus bathrooms, adult bookstores, and backrooms in some of the bars.  No bots in the equation at all.  You saw exactly what you were going to get and they were there for the same reason as you were.   Not nearly the number of games that go on today with the hook-up aps.   Much simpler and more honest IMO.

[tenderloin]

Yes, Grindr probably works for the young and the pretty.  Even when one factors in the aesthetics (I do find there are a small few who are into dads & dadbods), there is still significant filtering for us mature folks to do. In NYC, my guess is that less than 30% of the profiles are actually genuine and viable. As for the rest, we have:

1. The voyeurs who are only looking to get off virtually, and never intend to actually meet anyone in person.
2. The liars who use inaccurate photos/stats to disguise age, weight, and other characteristics 
3. The scammers who are after your personal info (about five times a day I hear from a pretty Asian guy who asks me "what are you looking for here?" ...sometimes I reply "my glasses")
4. The grifters who are looking for cash, but don't tell you until you've spend 30 minutes chatting with them.
5. The trolls (homophobes) who seem to get off on pranking people ("on my way...in the subway now....")
6. The dudes currently living in Rwanda or Bolivia or Kabluchistan who know that I am the man for them and they want to spend the rest of their lives with me.
7. The brain dead who ask those great questions:
    Q "what are you into?"  A: "read my profile and you will see." 
    Q "how old are you?" A: "read my profile and you will see" 
    Q: "where are you?" A "read my profile....". 
8. Those with "unusual" tastes/preferences: Among the requests I have received are to agree to fuck someone on the subway, force odd objects into someone's rectum, parTy, etc. etc. 
   
   
   Aside from those folks, the apps are great...  

Edited December 7, 2023 by tenderloin

[marylander1940]

18 hours ago, Vin_Marco said:

I've never feared it for competition for what I do or any of the other hook up apps and sites. However, I have a friend in Los Angeles, who no longer uses Grindr as he calls it a "hostile" environment he says people can be brutally mean on Grindr

Do we have a "cocky" emoji?

Agreed, besides Grindr IS definitively good for business because folks after spending hours trying to get laid, they realize they can get what they want whenever they want and without drama and teasing. 

[Guest]

23 minutes ago, marylander1940 said:

Do we have a "cocky" emoji?

Agreed, besides Grindr IS definitively good for business because folks after spending hours trying to get laid, they realize they can get what they want whenever they want and without drama and teasing. 

I sincerely apologize if that came off as cocky or braggadocios 😞 It was certainly not my intent... it's just that "competition" comes up a lot on this forum and I think I view it  quite differently than most... I actually encourage and appreciate "competition" it's part of what makes me strive to be better. I'm not an idiot, of course I know it's there but I also put blinders on and push on fast and hard in my own lane. 

Edited December 7, 2023 by Vin_Marco

[pubic_assistance]

3 hours ago, EZEtoGRU said:

Grindr is for the young and handsome/pretty.  It seems to work much better if you're in a big city

It may "work better for the young and pretty" and it may work better In "a big city." But I have a young (27) and very pretty friend here in NYC who says that guys will spend all day LOOKING because there's so much to pick from. (Honestly, I think he does the same). Always searching for greener pastures and never ready to commit to anything until they've exhausted their search. By then they're too tired to fuck.So they go to bed alone 😔

[Jamie21]

It works better if you’re new in a small town. All the locals, bored of the same pictures coming up on their grid suddenly see ‘new meat’ 😂. When I used Grindr (before I was banned- thankfully) it was useful only when on holiday to somewhere new. Otherwise it’s definitely a time waster. 

[pubic_assistance]

31 minutes ago, Jamie21 said:

It works better if you’re new in a small town. All the locals, bored of the same pictures coming up on their grid suddenly see ‘new meat’

This I agree with.

As part of my job, I need to travel outside Manhattan to job sites in Westchester County and Long Island/ the Hamptons. Sometimes, I will check my Grindr to see who's around. By the time I get back to my office, I've got dozens and dozens of messages from having signed on in a new area where it's just small surburban villages, and therefore, a smaller population to pick from.  "New meat" seems to be welcomed, (no matter how close I am to my expiration date) 🤣

Edited December 7, 2023 by pubic_assistance
spelling

[Simon Suraci]

46 minutes ago, pubic_assistance said:

guys will spend all day LOOKING because there's so much to pick from. (Honestly, I think he does the same). Always searching for greener pastures and never ready to commit to anything until they've exhausted their search. By then they're too tired to fuck.So they go to bed alone 😔

^ This 100%
 

2 hours ago, Vin_Marco said:

cocky or braggadocios

Danny, you’re a humblecock

Urban Dictionary: Humblecock

WWW.URBANDICTIONARY.COM

---

hum-ble-cock / h^m bel kok/ n. 1 a quietly confident individual who does not brag or otherwise flaunt his...